/ck/ - Food & Cooking

It looks like the slop in the bottom of the trash cans at work

No. There is no way to lessen the calories. Once you use the phrase "lessen the calories" you're full on mainland european.

>>4444266
Use good quality sausages and back bacon rather than streaky. In fact only have one of each. No black pudding but mushrooms and baked beans are ok. Skip the fried bread. Make sure your egg is poached instead of fried and try to use very little oil.

>>4444273
I think taking out the black pudding might help, but I'm not sure if it won't be as authentic.

>>4444278
To be fair black pudding is more of a scottish and irish thing.

>>4444275
What kind of sausages? I want to poach the eggs as well.

It isn't an English breakfast if the muffins don't have nooks and crannies

This is an important detail

The plate in your photo looks like something from a redneck covered dish supper

>>4444279
Is there an English equivalent to it, or what?

>>4444282
>nooks and crannies
Meaning..? And yeah, I see the unappeal.

>>4444266

>Lessen calories
>English Breakfast

Choose one. For me, personally, black pudding is an essential part of an english breakfast, even if it isnt strictly english.

Sausage, bacon, fried egg, beans, mushrooms, fried bread and black pudding are what constitutes an english breakfast for me. Quite a few places do hash browns or some other form of potato, but personally I dont agree with that. Theres plenty of carbs with the fried bread and beans.

start by frying some bacon. Once the bacon's done, remove it from the pan and then cook up your sausages, eggs, mushrooms, tomatoes, black pudding, etc. in the bacon grease. Heat up some beans, and you're good to go. If you want to go the extra mile then fry some bread in the pan after you've finished cooking everything else--it soaks up all the grease & drippings.

>>4444266
>lessen the calories but keep the good flavor?

Eat a smaller portion

>>4444286
Nooks and Crannies are what separate a proper English Muffin from a standard bun

It's basically all already been said. You do'nt need to go overboard like OP's pic. Grill 1/2 good quality pork sausages, back bacon. One poached or fried egg and some toast. That's where I'd stop if I were just cooking for myself, but if you're making an event of it add SOME beans, not like the heap in the pic, some mushrooms, fried until crispy (so maybe fry the bacon to get some grease, unless you're trying to do it healthily in which case fuck the mushrooms altogether.) Black pudding is sound, fuck muffins and potatoes and fried bread, I need to get up and do shit after eating my breakfast.

>>4444288
I'll remove the black pudding then. I don't think they have any here, but maybe I'll try next time. >>4444291
Thanks for this, good man! Seems to me like I can do this. How many times have you cooked the dish?

>>4444281
Chipolatas are a good choice of sausage if you can't find any straight breakfast sausages.
Also
TOMATOES!
Drip some of the cooking fat on those juicy red pockets of glory and maybe even some mixed herbs if you want to get fancy- although anything but salt and pepper is deviating from tradition.
Directly from Wikipedia:" A traditional full English breakfast includes bacon (traditionally back bacon), poached or fried eggs, fried or grilled tomatoes, fried mushrooms, fried bread or toast with butter, sausages and baked beans, usually served with a mug of tea."
They missed hash browns which are essential also.
Try not to serve too much of each element so that the meal doesn't go cold while being eaten and try to serve it with some elegance- don't just pile shit on the plate like pic.

>>4444304
Thanks, appreciate it. I'm in for a good reunion with my bros. And also, what exactly do you mix and match in this dish? First time doing this, and it was also a request.

>>4444313
Yep, definitely add toing tomatoes on the list! I'm thinking fried shiitake mushrooms but I'm not sure of what kind is used traditionally.

>>4444325
Whole button mushrooms or quartered flat mushrooms of any type really.

>>4444325
Button Mushrooms. Shiitake Mushrooms are a different texture. Buttons or Chestnut mushrooms are what you need.

>>4444333

>>4444333
Holy shit dude, sweet get. It emphasizes your message about the different textures of mushrooms in a dramatic way and made your post a pleasure to read.

>>4444336
I'm waiting for
>> 4444444

>>4444333
Short supply of them here. Any other substitutes?

>>4444344

get

>>4444344
portobellos are a nice swap in

based /sp/ here to grab your 4444444

>>4444356

Fuck off /sp/, /s4s/ has got this.

>>4444356
/sp/? Do you even lift? I bet not.

#lifting #betterthanyou #yolo

>>4444360


>TFW NO GF

chicken nugger

>>4444266
>Britfags from /ck/, please indulge me on how to correctly create a proper English Breakfast. How do you like it?
Isn't how you like it more important than some random anons?

>Are there any ways to lessen the calories but keep the good flavor?
Use less oil when you're frying, although draining well on kitchen paper before serving doesn't hurt either way.

Obviously: no fried bread. Skipping the fried mushrooms would help too, since they're basically sponges for any fat you cook 'em in. If you're having eggs, poach them.

Less obvious: quality sausages often (but not always) have a lower fat content so it's important to check labels. But there's a tradeoff in flavour -- M&S used to have 80% meat pork sausages, which while nice and lean simply weren't as tasty or juicy as your typical banger.

Black and white pudding can both be higher in fat than you'd expect, so don't serve too much if you're doing any of either. In fact portion size is THE thing that'll help control the calories for food like this.

>>4444313
>Directly from Wikipedia:" A traditional full English breakfast includes bacon (traditionally back bacon), poached or fried eggs, fried or grilled tomatoes, fried mushrooms, fried bread or toast with butter, sausages and baked beans, usually served with a mug of tea."
>They missed hash browns which are essential also.
Sorry, er, what?
>hash browns
>English

I like hash browns a lot, but they are in no way part of a traditional English mate.

>>4444379
I'm trying to get some input from other anons, maybe get some views on what is generally better to put on the dish.

Sausage must be good quality, high pork content.
Heinz baked beans (well cooked, thicker is best)
Bacon (never streaky)
Eggs - Fried or Poached, scrambled if you must
Fried mushrooms
Toast and/or fried bread
Tomatoes - Fried or baked (optional imo)
Black pudding is more common than white (in England) but is not all too common relative to the other parts. Both are delicious.

Hash browns do not belong in a proper English breakfast. neither do wedges or waffles or chips.

>>4444344
Baby bella are nice.

>>4444396
What's the difference between black and white?
>>4444391
So what do I put instead of hash browns?

>>4444403
White doesn't have blood.

>>4444391
My English father swears that they are, I'll have to talk to him about that then, thankyou.

>>4444415
Isn't pudding basically blood?
>>4444416
I swear on me fukin dad m8 ill blind yeh

/sp/ get

>>4444431
>Overestimating the speed of this board

Fried bread is a must OP

fuck off /sp/

/s4s/ are the keepers of the gets

>>4444434
Damn it don't do this I
/b/ and /ck/ get

>>4444444
YESS!!!!!!! YES OH MY GOD I LOVE YOU ANON!!!!

>>4444444
>>4444444
DAMN IT

>>4444444
>Le plebbit derivative board xD

>>4444444
Whatever, can we move along?

Polite sage.

>>4444444
Glory

>>4444444
YES! YES!

>>4444444
now shut the fuck up and get out you retard fucks

>>4444444
̥̱̊́̑ͯͩ̈́̽ͮ̈́K̬̭͔̳̜͂̐ͪ̈'̳̮̮̪̈̋ͪ̍̓i̲̘̹̻͐̑̋͐n̼͓͓̫͖̻̝̿ͦ̆͛̊i͕̹ͨ͒͛̅̎̆͐ͩc̲͔̺̟̈̿͗ͥͤh͎͕̰̹̒ͦ̂ ̙̻̰͌ͥͣJ̩͙̠̫̳̙̩͇͐́a̳̯͔̪͆ͦ̉ͬ͆ͤn̰̺̥̟̯ͧ̊̍̒ͭ̅ͫa͇̦̳̦̞ͭ̂̑a͎͖̥͔͙͙ͫ̈́́͒b̻̗͉͂'̟͎͈̞͙̟̜̍͌̽ͤ̉͑ ̘̠͍̜͍͙͉̼ͤP̪͚̞͓͐͛̔̓̌͋a̯͉ͧ̔͊ͫ͗̍̂k̤̲͉͔͛ͤ̌̓͒͐ͤ͐ͅá͖͙̺̟̗ͅl̥͍̙̣͚͓̤̏͑͊ͯ̌̓̀
͇͈̬͆ͯ̉̌ ̖̝͚̼̎̏́ͫK̠̟ͦ̚'̥̤̹͉̘̜̪̹͋ͧi̬̐̐̐ͥ̈́̇n̺͎͍͇͓̼ͧ̏ͧ͊̈́ͅi͖̱̖̣̒ͭͭ̍͐͒̀c̪͚͙̣̓̅ͩh̝͚̙͕̐̀̉ͥͅ ̫̭̹͚̩̱͚ͧ̇̌̚J̘̫̯̝̏ͭa̤̝͉̫̠͖̫̍̃͊͂ͣn̬͎̆ͦ̽̾a̰̠͕͚̹̰̋ͪ̂̎̌̈̑a̬̻̘͂͒̂̆̂ͪ̓b̳̥͌ͪͯ'̗̦͐ͨ̉̍̾ͧ͒ ͇̭̫̯͓̩ͣͮͥͭ̊̍P̩̮̥̙̹̞̟̅͋̽͊ͅa̱͈̭̿̏̃͒̓̌k͔̲̊̇ả͈̳̞l̥̭͇̝͉̦̺͎͋͛ͪ
̞͕̫͕̣̗͍̂͂ͯͮ ̬͒̌͌͒K̫̜̔ͬ̆'̤̦̟̙͇̬̾ͦ͌̇i̼̣̣͉ͥ̋ͮͤn͇͎̺̦̬͍̖̘͉ͮ͆̾́͌̓̋̈́̓i̙̓ͩ̾ͭ̽̒ͥc̥̻̦͚͗̆̑ͅh̲̙̥̱̳̊̒̋̌͆ͮ ͕̯̱̲ͭ̌J̭̤̥̜̘͒̃ͥ̿̈ͯͨ̎a̪̠̻̮̱̪͊̍͗ͪ̓ͤn̗̲̞̿͛ͭ́̃͒ā̟̲̹̲̻ͬ̊͂à̙͉͙̎b̪̯͑̊̑̾ͯ͛͒'̬͇͔͓̫͉̘͆̇̃̅̓̓ͫͅ ͓̖̣̙̩ͩ̂̿P͚͓̘̗̮͗ͤ̄͗͒ͦ̂̀ạ͚̬͈̤̋̅̓͆̅͛k̠͉͖̮͒͗ă͚̤̤̙̭ͪ̇̎͛̑l̦̼̗̱̗̓̓ͧ͒̆̋͋ͥ
͙͇ͩͫ͒̉̃ͥ̓ ̜͓̝̗̯̪̏ͥ͌̈ͨͧ̾̀K̜̳̥̮̙̓̊͊̋ͥ'̫̦̩̉́ͦ͆i̺͎̠̞̺͓̼̋̌ͮͣ͌̽͗n̘ͫ̆͛̌ȋ̮͖̱͖̩͔̞̳͛̔ͭ̀̆͋̅c̤̦̣͙̘̜͓͎̃͛̓ͬ́̈́͗̏ẖ̥̒̔̓̀̆̉͐ ̫̦͚̟̲͌̃̐́J̞̼͕̦̜͑̃̔̄ͮ̅̚ͅa̜͈͖ͥ͂̋̓̚n͇̫͉̯ͦ͌̈́̓ͯa̙̜͖̪͕͙̐̐͑̏̄ͨ̊a̰͈͖ͯ͋̓͋ͮb̻͔̩ͭͅ'̜̜̗̝͎͍̔̀ ̫̝͖̥̤͈͕͗́ͅP͍̩͕̖̬̣̮̙̯ͤ̾̀̎̚ã͈̲̠̪͉̫ͪ̈́̑ͥͨk̫̦̬̪̽ͫ͋ͅa̹̼̞̜̪̒̉ḻ͇̟ͭͬ͑̎͊̈́

>>4444444
NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO YOU FUCKING CUNT, YOULL NEVER HANDLE OUR BANTER

>>4444431
Too soon anon.

Hash browns are essential in my opinion. Also, for breakfast only, sausages > bacon

>>4444444
I'VE WAITED FOR THIS ALL DAY AND BY ALL DAY I MEAN LIKE 30 MINUTES!

>>4444444
Fuck. Thread derailed.

OP here. Pleasure getting master-dubs on my thread. I hope I'll get the dish right tomorrow. Will post pics.

>>4444465
>mfw hovered cursor over image
>mfw waiting for it
>...wait for it...
>filename.jpg

:(

>>4444444
toplel

>>4444403
>What's the difference between black and white?
Black pudding is made using blood (usually powdered blood these days but whatever), along with finely ground pork and/or beef, fat, rusk, pinhead oatmeal or whole oats and the seasonings of course.

White is basically all the above only without the blood.

>So what do I put instead of hash browns?
Fried bread maybe? But you don't have to sub in anything, if you want hash browns have hash browns.

/sp/ get

>>4444444
dave greatly approves of this get

>>4444496
I see. I'm probably going to go with fried bread since the hash browns are heart attack inducing
>inb4 the whole dish is

But yeah. I'm aiming for an authentic.

>>4444266
That seriously looks disgusting.

>>4444275
That's not going to be a proper English Breakfast anymore though is it, a nice breakfast but not an English breakfast

>>4444396
Putting knob of butter in the beans is also good, but doesn't fit the request for lower cal!

4444444 get

Hash browns are a bardardisation of the fry up and should not be tolerated.

>>4444523
too late haha

Fry the bread last to soak up all the fat

>>4444549
I'd rather have hash browns than a huge sloppy mess of beans that makes my plate look even more like pig slop.

They deep fat fried my mushrooms fucking fat brits

>>4444619
>deep fat fried

There's a difference between dropping a mushroom into an inch of oil and deep frying it, and sauteeing it in a tablespoon of bacon fat. Brits do the latter, and if you haven't tried it I feel really sorry for you.

>>4444444

im proud of your achievement sonny boy.

>>4444626
Nah they were definitely deep fat fried considering how shrivelled the outsides were. I have a couple of questions:

1. What do you typically put brown sauce on?
2. Are the sausages used in a full english always so mushy?

>>4444636
I'm not english, so I wouldn't know. Also mushrooms can get shrivelled like that regardless of how you cook them.

The most common issue with fry ups is the shit-tier sausages people seem to think are fit for human consumption.

I'm talking walls, or seemingly anything that isn't "luxury" in super markets.

Vaguley meat flavoured tubes of mush, yuck.

>>4444444

>>4444282
there's black pudding on that tray. And baked beans.

Rednecks do not eat either of those things. There woud be more meat, more eggs, and the egg would be fried.

>>4444444

>>4444819
Please ban sceak. Thank you on behalf of /ck/.

>>4444819
You forgot to mention that the get was in a GOAT national cuisine thread too.

>>4444819
>responding to gets with a mod tag and board shittalk
>being a terrible "culture" mod
pick both

>>4444878
report him.
see what happens.

>>4444878
I accidentally left my mod tag on. :(

>>4444444
Mein Fuhrer!

Mushrooms... yuck

>>4444444

lets go tell /sp/

I fucking make a ton of shit for breakfast and enjoy a great morning. Then I have people going "I CANT MAKE A FANCY BREAKFAST IM AN ADULT WITH PAYING JOB"

Are people really that lazy in the morning? How do you even work if you're like that? Do you fucking spend the first two hours sleepy as fuck

What kind of lard ass breakfast is this, holy shit.

>>4444266
The minimal English breakfast is bacon (fried or grilled or, if really desperate, microwaved), eggs (fried or scrambled usually, but not an omelette) and at least one of baked beans, cooked tomatoes and fried mushrooms. Oh, and toast or something closely related. Have with coffee or tea. The toast will often be had with orange marmalade, though I know that the US has many acceptable alternatives to that.

It is commonly done to add some fried or grilled sausages, fried potato or hash browns, fried black pudding (not in all parts of the UK, but still definitely there), add more of the optional things from the first list, and have additionally some fruit juice with it (orange being the most common choice, but that's up to you). The coffee/tea remains mandatory.

Don't think this is a slimming dish. It's not. Instead think of it as meaning you'll either be working physically very hard, or not be having a large midday meal.

Most hotels serve the full english as a breakfast buffet, so that you can choose exactly what components you want. This is the correct way to do it, though nobody will hold it against you if you plate up for everyone in the kitchen instead.

Of course, if you're *really* serious about having a proper English breakfast, you'll have a brace of kippers. That's definitely hard core though; if you don't like smoked fish, avoid.

Of course, most people in England start the day with cereal or toast. Life's too short to do the full works every morning...

As long as you're eating meat, you're eating better than most Americans.

>>4444283
Some parts of England make their own distinct type of black pudding. The Pudding Line (like the Mason-Dixon line, but more important) does not correspond with country boundaries at all.

>>4445421
I can only eat hot things for breakfast

>>4445421
>As long as you're eating meat
The best horse bute money can buy!

>>4444508
In that case I recommend eating a full english breakfast less often.

>not eating a full southern breakfast with biscuits and gravy

>>4444444
>>4444444
>>4444444
>>4444444
WAT

>>4445441
>>>/b/

Take your number autism back to /b/, we don't give a shit.

>>4445462
>>4445462
OLDFAG LE PRIDE? AMIRITE? XD

>>4445462
>number autism

You're fucking kidding me right

God tier english breakfast ( cheffag in london for 6 years) :

Sausages - as usual, not much to improve here,
Tomatoes : halves, season with s/p, finely chop thyme, sprinkle on top, thin flake of garlic on each , roast in oven
Eggs - if fried, yolk runny, if scrambled, add butter and double cream a bit, heat gradually while mixing, heat VERY SLOWLY. DO NOT ADD SALT until you serve it, makes it watery.
mushrooms - usually button, fry in butter with s/p, thyme until lightly golden
Backon - back, smoked, roast or panfried,
Baked beans - upon reheating add little bit of butter, ketchup, s/p, worcestershire sauce,
Black pudding - as usual,
Instead of hash brown make some bubble&squeak = mashed pots + blanched savoy cabbage+sauteed red onions, combine on frying pan with butter, s/p, and fry that bitch to get a lots of brown color. Incorporate the color in the mixture, the more color the more flavor. Personal favorite of mine on english breakfast.
Toasts - buttered.

Success guaranteed. Used to charge £12 for this and people were buying it.

You're welcome.

>>4444279

IS IT FUCK! GET THAT BLACK PUDDING BACK ON THE PLATE OR GO EAT A FUCKING CREPE!

pic related altough different style. Green stuff is watercress.

American here

We eat shitty link sausages instead of real sausages
We don't eat mushrooms
I don't know what the fuck that is inbetween the black pudding and beans
We don't eat beans for breakfast
We never heard of black pudding in our life
We eat bacon (BACON IS BEST EVAR etc) for breakfast instead of ham
Breakfast is the one thing I think we fucking suck at
Well I'd say everything but whatever, "mate"

>>4445597
That looks fucking delicious and I want it in mah belly right now!!!!

Its a cheap, fatty breakfast. Just make it however you like it. This isn't a fucking gourmet thing that has to be done a certain way. Sure there's a generally standard way of making it, but it's not some fucking ancient secret. If you don't like part of it, leave it out. Its just simple, rich food.

>>4445652
>We
>We
>We
>We

Nigger please.

>>4445652
ok, as an American I assure you that ham is eaten at breakfast time. Especially in the south.
>dat redeye gravy on biscuits with ham, fug.

>>4445652
Also american here

Only idiots eat shitty link sausages, the majority of the rest of us eat stuff called "country sausage" which is heavily spiced and doesn't come in a casing
Fuck you mushrooms are awesome
Tbh I don't know what that stuff is either (white pudding maybe?)
Black pudding isn't as readily available over here
Fuck you have some country ham biscuits you yankee bastard
You've never had a good breakfast in your life if you think we can't do good breakfasts
Go suck a dick

>>4445812
A majority eats sausage links bro

>Are there any ways to lessen the calories but keep the good flavor?

eat less.. Or cut back on cooking oil.

I've never been a fan of black pudding

>>4445757
Ham is not a food, or haven't you heard?

>>4445812
Bubble and squeak

>>4445589>
>OP asks for healthier wnglish breakfast
>Chef fag here
>Add extra butter on everything, add cream, moar butter
Confirmed for chef fag

>Hash browns are not a part of an English breakfast

u wot m8

Don't listen to these cunts i doubt half of them even live in Bongland (Or are from the posh snooty parts if so)

GOAT English breakfasts

>Kippers
>Fried Kidneys on toast/fried bread
>Poached eggs on toast
>Fry up
>Kedgeree
>Muselee
>Brown Toast, butter, Gooseberry or Rhubarb jam.

Also, Hash browns are only served in shitty greasy spoons. They're not part of a real English breakfast.

>>4446447
that's not how you cook black pudding though.

You slice it like salami, you don't serve it like a brat.

Thin slices, fried both sides so it has a definite crunch to it when you bite. Perfuckingfection.

It's true that we love kippers for breakfast, but they're not part of the dish people are talking about when we say Full English

>>4447017
Full English is a sexual act often performed with a pool cue

>>4445418
>Kippers
>Not recommended for everyone
What kind of sick fuck wouldn't want smoked herring?

Hey /ck/! OP here. Came back to this thread this morning. Posting pics of what I did, but not the final job, as I just cooked it to see if it would taste alright. I made fries instead of hashbrowns and forgot to include other shit. Pretty alright job for an amerifat, right?


>inb4 redneck arrangement

No, fuck you guys. Give me something to improve on because the date's been postponed.

>>4447049
>fries
No, no, definitely not.
Why is your sausage bright red?
Why is your bread not toasted?
I don't consider the beans optional, myself.

>>4447052
It's mostly the lighting. Toasted the bread for maybe 7 minutes and the sausage, I'm not sure either.

>>4447049
Bread needs to be toasted, also you need hashbrowns fuck what you've heard a full English has hash browns as a bongland resident i can confirm this. Also you need some baked beans and wtf is that giant red thing?

>>4447049
>no beans
>no butter
Dry as fuck / 10

That is not a sausage.

I'm actually fucking laughing. Man, I love you co/ck/s. Alright. I'll buy better sausages. Brands?

>>4447049
-cook your bangers to drip first, when done heat up the oil to high and fry your bread, then brown to finish at the end when all the flavors are in the oils. No clue where you can find good puddings but its not hard to make from scratch.
If she's english her knicks'll soak for a hot red pudding supper

>>4445812
Eh, ex-aemrican and I'd have to say breakfast in south london kicks the shit out of even most expensive joints in the US. Though probably just because they accept the all-loving that is mixed meats.

I don't imagine you guys get Cumberland but sausages that look like this instead of long red hemorrhoids

>>4447068
they're available at megamarkets like costco but America is seriously lacking. Damn all this breakfast talk, time for a quick spot.

>>4447061
This. It looks like red egg of sorts.

>>4447049
Those potato... things... looks under cooked.

Either way, potatoes (hash browns, chips ect) are only server in horrible greasy spoons here.

What the hell is up with your sausage?
What the hell is up with your bacon?
Why are there no baked beans?
mushrooms look a little under cooked.

-1/10

>>4447054
If you say it's toasted then you either need a better toaster or turn it up a bit.

>>4447049
that sausage looks more like a saveloy, which is fine British cuisine. However it is not breakfast.

The proper procedure for eating saveloy is to buy one with a pickled gherkin and chips from the chip shop. You then have to raise it suggestively to a 45degree angle when a sexy lady walks past whilst one of your colleagues makes a slide sound on a swanee whistle, and another exclaims "oooh, matron!"

Also:
>fried bread not toast or bread
>no hash brown
>brown sauce not ketchup
>fresh tomato sliced in half and fried cut side down
>or tinned tomato sluiced out into a pan and heated
>black pudding sliced and cried crispy
>no potato content whatsoever
>bacon to egg ratio is always greater. So if you have two eggs, must have minimum 3 slices of bacon. this is NON negotiable.

>>4447077
>The proper procedure for eating saveloy is to buy one with a pickled gherkin and chips from the chip shop. You then have to raise it suggestively to a 45degree angle when a sexy lady walks past whilst one of your colleagues makes a slide sound on a swanee whistle, and another exclaims "oooh, matron!"

British humor anons.

>>4447081
>British humor
no u

>>4447081
u r 1 cheeki cunt m8

>>4447049
No offence, but if that's the best you can do I suggest you just copy your picture from your original post. The one that you've made barely looks authentically English at all, and it doesn't look particularly appetising. Take your original pic, and grill (instead of frying) where possible to reduce unhealthiness. Then add toast. And watch your friends rejoice.

>>4447195
>grill (instead of frying)
GTFO
it's not called a Grill-Up you ponce.
Everything in one pan, OP. Tonnes of lard/dripping/cooking oil, soaked up with a fat slice of fried bread.
Eat now, bypass later fagets.

>>4446963
You're making me hungry mate

>>4447208
I agree with you, but OP wanted tips on making it healthier. What I meant was, grill instead of frying if you WANT to increase healthiness. But I wouldn't recommend grilling where taste or authenticity is concerned.

>>4444266
Just know that every English breakfast requires:
Beans
Fried eggs
Sausages
Bacon
Black pudding

Everything else is filler.

>>4444279
>Southerner who has no idea what he is talking about detected.

you saunter outside in promiscuous dress, go home and squeeze the jism from your major orifices and stab/gunshot wounds into hot oil, and serve with cheap lager

>>4447275
Shouldn't you be fucking your sister, northerner?

Disregard the grubby chavs that think hash browns belong in an English breakfast.

>>4447273
>english breakfast
>black pudding
u wot m8

scottish breakfast maybe

>>4447596
>No tattie scones
>No white pudding

Nigga if it doesn't feature these its English

Blood pudding is eaten everywhere, its not just a Scottish thing.

>>4444266
How to English Breakfast

Wake up in the morning feeling like Queen Lizzie
Grab my slippers and my fags I'm gonna go get busy
Before I do, wash my teeth with a pint of tea
'Cause stone me! last night's lager was far too fizzy

Right fuck that, I'm not going to sit here hanging trying to fit a recipe into a Kesha song. The main thing to remember is that a fry up has the same disagreement that Cream tea or a proper brew does, just cook what you like and damn the devil.

Personally, I'm a fan of the all-in

Frying pan, bit of oil, sausages followed by black pudding followed by bacon followed by eggs (keep them runny!) Once they're cooked chuck in some cheap white bread to soak up all that lovely dripping and bacon scraps. WHILST THAT'S OCCURING have some mushrooms in a smaller pan with a lid on too with plenty of butter, they'll cook in their own quite fine just don't forget them when you're serving up. Finally chuck some baked beans in the microwave, and some tomatoes if that's your thing pervert.

Putting it on a plate is fairly easy, just make sure eggs on top of the fried bread so the yolks cover it after you break them open.

Sauce wise, I'm a ketchup kinda guy, but if brown sauce is your thing then go for it - a breakfast is an Englishman's own private castle.

To drink, mug of tea with plenty of sugar and a bit of milk. Don't give me shite about "2013, sugar in your tea, unhealth" - you're sitting down to eat a plate of fat that built an empire, man up and get it down you

>>4449472
>microwave

Not even once.

>>4444266
To make it healthier you could put everything under the grill and poach the eggs. Portion control too. This does goagainst the spirit of the meal though. High fat fuel for a day on the farm.

>>4444279
What the fuck are you talking about? Black pudding is English. Are you thinking of white pudding which is Irish?

>>4444282
>muffins
What?

>>4444313
But that misses the black pudding, one of the most distinctive parts.

>>4445589
>color 3 times
>flavor
you
>not a seppo talking shite

>>4445652
What do you mean by real sausages because sausages come in links. Also, who mentioned ham? If you are having ham then you have lost control of your life.

>>4447049
What the hell is that red tube thing?
Those are chips and not fries
What the hell is that black thing on the right?

>>4447068
They aren't Cumberlands you dildo. Cumberlands are ringed

That looks so disgusting.

And for breakfast?

Do Eurofags really eat nasty shit like this for breakfast? No wonder they're such faggots.

>>4449236
Dear Scotland,
Lorne sausage is fucking heaven and if I could marry a foodstuff I would beg you on hand and knee
love,
Wales

>>4449472
I appreciate what you tried to do there, anon. It amused me while it lasted.

>>4449759
>Eurofags
Continental poofs eat shit like pastries for breakfast. This is 100% English man food.

>>4449760
You're welcome, Wales. We love them too.

What's with all the Britfags in here?

Fuck this. Why would anyone EVER want to emulate British "cuisine"? American food is virtually the best there is. We have the best burgers, fries, steaks, chicken, potatoes, pies, even pizza (real Italian pizza is shit). Tacos are great, and some Mexican food is good, but other than that, American outdoes everyone else.

Somebody show me one genuinely British dish that doesn't taste like a faggot's dildo.

>>4449760
Dear Wales
Your language sounds like a very angry Donald Duck fighting a rabid cat with an unreasonable vacuum cleaner against a background of analog television static.
Love,
The rest of the world.

PS
HISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS HAGH SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS<wbr> THTHTHTHTHTHTHT PTHTHTHT

PPS
It's a fucking "microwave oven," not a "popty ping."

>>4449774
b8 harder, m8

>>4449775
Nobody outside of the Valleys even speaks Welsh. It's a pointless language and I agree with you entirely.

The civilised world also just calls them "microwaves" and understands what that means without having to append the word "oven". Thanks for contributing though, America.

>>4449775
Actually, it sounds more like they're gargling placentas, but whatevs....

>>4449787

Well the thing is, out here in the normal world, microwaves are recognized to be used in telecommunications (telecoms as you guys call them) as well as reheating your frozen horse lasagne. So without appending "oven" or "antenna" or wot 'ave you, one would assume that "microwave" on its own refers to the waves themselves.

Next thing you know, you'll be adding pointless prefixes like "in" to perfectly good words like "flammable", causing confusion and fatalities.

>>4449759
>conflating mainland europe and the uk
You are the worst kind of person.

>>4449819

Hey, so every time I use that word on 4chan it causes someone to rage and accuse me of wikipedia or something. Does that ever happen to you?

>>4449813
There's this marvellous thing called "context" which miraculously negates the need for specific accuracy in almost every situation. Nobody with any degree of social adjustment would assume you were talking about "telecoms" if you said "microwave" in a discussion about food.

>>4449829
Remember, americans don't speak English. Like most foreigners, they struggle with contextual language which can, from the outside, seem ambiguous.

>>4449829
>marvellous

You should enable spell check, most modern browsers have it. Also, if context is so important why do you guys insist on sticking "aero" in front of the word "plane"? Just in case someone thinks that that when I "took a plane to London" it means I carried a geometric abstraction with me on a steamship?

>>4449775
Just kidding, Wales. I love you guys and I think your language, as awful as it sounds spoken, is lovely in song.
At the very least, it's the least awful of the Gaelic languages with Irish topping the list.

Let's have a pint when next I'm in Cardiff.
Love,
Italy.

>>4449840
"Marvellous" is the English spelling. You know, the correct one.

Nobody says "Aeroplane" in contextual conversation. You've clearly never heard a British person speak outside of a film.

>>4449846
Welsh beer is pretty good.

Just don't drink Brains. It tastes like muddy water. Shame of our nation, and all the Welsh "patriots" drink it purely because it's Welsh.

>>4449851

Nah, my English professors in college and my English/Australian people I work with (same spelling mistakes, same bizarro accent) help me understand your strange speech and writing patterns just fine. But I'm glad American English (aka modern standard English) is finally having a reforming effect on your backwards, albeit amusing and historically interesting ways.

>>4449861
>taking pride in ignorance
Typical American.

>>4449856
I love how the Welsh surname "Brain" looks identical to an English word but means "Crows" in Welsh and not the nervous system centre as it is in English. I think it's a fun little fact.

That said, I've never had Brains. Is there a crow on the bottle or the typical Welsh dragon so many pseudoWelsh things carry?

>>4449875
Yep, same old dragon.

Not that I'm ashamed of being Welsh or anything, but they could at least have chosen a dragon that didn't look retarded.

>>4449885
I don't think I could get it back home (Italy) but I might be able to find it stateside (where I live currently). Is there a particular variety you'd suggest if I can find it here? Otherwise, I'll have one more thing to look forward to when next I'm in Wales.

>>4449861
Look everyone! The American is trying to talk like a British man.

>>4449909
I don't know if you'll ever find any decent welsh beers outside of here, but one I'd heartily recommend is Rhymney (rum-nee) Export. It's great, assuming you get a pint from a good batch. Has kind of a toffee taste to it.

>>4449949
I'll give it a try! This toffee flavour you describe sounds lovely.

>>4449949
Rhymney is ok - i went to their brewery once although I was really hung over at the time. The hobby horse (?) I think was pretty good

I've had at least one brains seasonal that I really liked too, but I don't remember which one it was

I prefer welsh cider tbh - gwynt y ddraig does several exceptional ones

Gotta have homemade beans in a bowl so you can add as much as you want.

Two nice, fat sausages.

Poached or Fried eggs

Two hash browns

Some mushrooms

Some sliced fried tomato

Crispy short cut bacon

and a side of toast if you want

>>4449760
whoa man never thought of using square sausage in this way

that breaky looks tasty as

What's the best way to fry tomato?

Make it an unvegetarian meal.

>>4450062
Griddle pan.

>>4450018
As what?

What!?

Please tell me!

I´m not english but i think it´s any combination of:
baked beans
fried eggs
sausages
bacon
fried mushrooms
fried or roasted tomatoes
toast
potato wafers or cakes (don´t remember the proper name)

>>4450945
hash browns. I just looked up wikipedia.

>>4444266

christ that looks digusting

british food culture is absolute shit tier

>>4447049

Damn that looks gross. Here's an example of a nice-try tier English Breakfast. Still needs beans tho

>>4450994
everything on that plate is delicious

>>4449949
the tomos watkins brewery has a few little gems coming out of it every now and again, but you have to be careful, they have quite a few terrible brews, from trying to make too much variety at once.

>>4449745
i think he's confusing back bacon with ham slices if you get what i mean

>>4444266
Goddamn, I love me some baked beans.

>>4451008
Burnt hashbrowns are burnt

>>4452603

>beans for breakfast

UK confirmed as Kingdom of the Hobos

>>4452752
>dissing beans
DYEL?

>>4452763

Beans are great. In the US though the only people who eat canned beans like that for breakfast are homeless people.

Pic related, it's Prince Phillip

>>4452768
The only people who have better lives than hobos are the super-rich. Much better to be a hobo than a couch potato.

>>4452790

>obviously never been hobo raped in a boxcar

>>4452797
hobos don't rape other hobos.
I said that hobos have a good life, not the people in close proximity of them.

>>4452798

>he thinks hobos don't live in a hobbesian nightmare of the constant rape of all

>>4452804
I'm making light of the subject, but in fact you're talking to someone who has for various reasons slept rough and used homeless shelters many times. Never been a homeless myself.

Then again, USA has the highest percentage of homosexual rape victims per head of population in the entire world, so I don't doubt that there are just as many gay bummings going on in this part of American life as every other.

>>4449764
pig slop

Think they've got enough food there... damn Eurolards.

5

Tell you what.
Get two bacon rashers. Three sausages. Half a grilled tomato. Fried egg. Some baked beans. Buttered toast. Slice of both black and white pudding. A bit of fried button mushrooms if you like them.
That's it.

>>4449760
I have to buy it in bulk when going home
haggis and black pudding to the sides