/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Nothing in your image is named anything like that. They all have appetizing names. Maybe you're upset about something imaginary?

>>19989024
Stop ordering based off what amazon recommends, then you'll get good hot sauce

>Sauce log # 769: Professor Prolapse's Seven Septillion Scoville Total Eclipse of the Shart Sauce.
>Whilst taking a weekend stroll through Newbury Comics and perusing the Funko Pop offerings, I happened upon a display most intriguing: various bawdily-labeled bottles and jars of that red ambrosia most dearest to my heart. My humor tickled and my taste buds tantalized, I simply had to - had to! - acquire one of each - no less than 6 bottles - to add to my (rather expansive) collection. I bid the cashier adieux and headed back to my apartment with exposed brick walls.
>Now, where to start with Professor Prolapse's Seven Septillion Scoville Total Eclipse of the Shart Sauce? The label is a most humorous thing, depicting what appears to be a Martian landscape with a man in lab refinery dragging his gaunt, agonized body across a vast desert, his anus having prolapsed and caught fire, trawling behind him like a smoldering red wedding train. I chuckle heartily at the daft scenario and proceed to open the bottle.
>Fragrance: Astringent leather and capsicum forward; notes of alium, smoke, electric fire, feline piss. Very mature. My mouth begins to water.
>Taste test: I dab 5 ml of the tip of my tongue and swish it about my mouth. And lo, lo, for the fields of Elysium have opened up before me, so godly is the sauce! Yet it is not taste which immediately elevates me to such a state (though the taste is very good); nay, it is the HEAT, my dear reader, the divine HEAT of Helios that surges across my tongue and through my nervous system that defines any concoction by that culinary alchemist Professor Prolapse. The name is not the utterings of a blackguard: this is not a hot sauce for the uninitiated.
>Final score: 81/100. Pairs nicely with a thrice-hopped IPA.

Go outside and actually interact with real human beings with an open mind and a positive attitude rather than getting mad at strawmen you have created based on internet memes. You will never be happy otherwise.

>>19989213
>sauce log
I'm not reading this but you got me with the intro for sure.

>>19989213
Change it to
>Sauce Log, Scoville date 1,000,000.9

>>19989024
>naked
>gay
>rape
OP, I have identified your problem.
You're a bad angry person
Get help and seek Christ

>>19989024
Mythical Beast spotted.

>>19989460
Wheres the joke Buckley?

>>19989024
So you can have interesting conversations with other sauce heads using funny names and ideas. It makes non sauce head people uncomfortable while making you feel enlightened.

>>19989024
>gay rape shitfuck prolapse nuclear bomb 3000
>unappetizing

real talk, the yellowbird blue agave sriracha is fucking delicious actually. it's slightly sweet and the heat builds the more you use it instead of blasting your ass immediately

>>19989213
your shitpost writing is pretty good, don't stop

>faggot.jpeg

pretty accurate shit post aswell

>>19989024
>>19991094
>yellow bird
A chick from work brought in their serrano hot sauce and I really enjoyed it. Really good flavor with some heat. I made a chicken quesadilla with hatch chiles, yellow onion, pepper jack, and that sauce. Shit was so cash.

>>19989213
Fucking jej

>>19989024

>Louisiana Hot Sauce

Damn, I love it. my favorite hotsauce hands down in terms of flavor. so simple but so good.

>>19989213

spices>sauces

>>19989024
weren't you making this thread six years ago? get some new material already

>>19989213
lol

ahem

>*sniff SNIFF"
>*Salivates*

>>19989213
I can't tell if some elements in your post are mistakes or placed to get under my skin. Par excellence

>>19991478
>his resigned yet miserable expression
maybe this ai thing isnt so bad

>depressed
>buy reaper squeezins
>it tastes good
>it hurts my butthole
well that was a waste of money. it hurts my butthole

>>19989460
Is the second character's dialogue really stilted and weird or am I having a stroke

>>19989213