/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>Modern Burgers
You mean meme burgers. Stop going to hipster places or make your own. Whiny little bitch.

>>19517608
Huh?

>>19517608
>What the FUCK went wrong?
The same thing that ruined beer & coffee for an entire generation: Hipsters.

>>19517608
YOU went wrong anon.
You were supposed to follow protocol.
They will be arriving soon.
Hope it was worth it.

>>19517608
I've noticed everything is just more greasy these days, maybe it's the PUFA

>>19517608
smash burgers are good, boomer, fuck off

>>19517693
fuck off no they're not, its literally just extra greasy ground beef in a pile

>>19517693
Chillin can consent

big tasty is the best burger of all time and no amount of seething by krauts from hamburg is going to change that

>>19517608
That look good thoughever

>>19517697
use thinner slices of cheese, dumbass.

>>19517608
I like both, I'm not a contrarian homo like you and just like food if it's good.

>>19517727
Children can consent yes

>>19517608
Where the fuck do you live where smash burgers have replaced normal burgers? They're entirely an instagram/reddit thing, and you'd have to go out of your way to find one irl outside of a fast food place. Go outside once in awhile; there are still normal burgers everywhere (brioche buns have largely become the norm, though).

>>19517608
The same reason fast food is so expensive. They have to use real quality ingredients nowadays.

>>19517838
Actually, the food is fresher and higher quality than ever.

>>19517838
>fast food expensive
Get a job. Fast food is cheap as fuck.

>frog poster
Ah... twas a troll. Here's a (you)

>>19517850
We're talking in relation to thw past dumbass. I may be retarded but I'm not a troll.

>>19517838
real soy protein, real soybean oil, real soy bread

>>19517857
>food price steadily increases over time

STOP THE PRESSES! THIS GUY IS A ROCKET SCIENTIST! Everything costs more than it once did you say?

Holy shit! *mind blown*

>>19517866
Don't forget this part!
>They have to use real quality ingredients nowadays.

>>19517608
oh boo hoo my life experience is only experience.

dude the only burgers that were like you say come from fast food places where they squeeze every drop of flavor out of them.

real burgers are juicy and "greasy".

>>19517693
Don't smash burgers, smash little girls.

>>19517869
Yeah ain't it something? As time progresses, we learn better food preservation technology and learn better techniques and procedures to make things fresher and better for everyone.

Wowie! I never knew as human civilization progresses we learn how to do things better. Who WOULDA THUNK?!

Christ you airwolfing retarded kids.

>>19517879
Try to be less retarded in the future. Even frogposting is less embarrassing than this drivel.

>>19517884
Yes, the frogposter should stop acting like a retard spouting nonsense. I agree.

>>19517608
>gross brioche buns
tf are you on
brioche is literally the best bread for burgers

>>19517870
juicy, maybe, but not greasy

greasy is "dude bacon dude cheese DUDE SMASH BURGER" soylent shit I will not eat

>>19517871
I do both

>>19517887
t: soylent zoomer

>>19517885
Eggs are poison.

>>19517893
t: unoriginal newfag

>>19517894
A cup of refined sugar daily is healthy.

>>19517898
Bread is poison.

>>19517902
Steak is healthy.

Children can consent.

>>19517915
BASED BASED BASED :DDDDD SO HECKING ZASED

>>19517889
juicy and greasy are the same thing tard.

>>19517920
As early as they understand the word.

mashachildrencanconsent.jpg

>>19517889
Smash retards think their burgers are juicy because they're covered in grease (and drowned in cheese and sauce). In reality, they're completely dry because they're always overcooked, and the only reason they always look greasy in pictures (the reason they're so popular on instagram and reddit) is because they're literally cooked on a flattop, which means they're sitting in their own grease. You could dip a burger in a deep fryer for a couple seconds and achieve the same effect - it wont make the burger any juicier.

>>19517838
bro thinks hes a /pol/ack

>>19517934
What

>>19517924
>water and fat are the same thing

>>19517937
so true anon

>>19517945
They MUST consent.

>Kewpie mayo on burger

>>19517953
do you have brain damage?

>>19517956
As early as they understand the word.

Boomer: McDonald's burger, folgers coffee, Coors.

Hipster: shake shack, starbucks, IPAs

It's objectively better the boomers taste.

>having a meltdown over someone posting a frog
>getting banned because of a frog
So this is modern /ck/

I don't understand the hate towards smash burgers. Are boomers trying to retroactively say their diners were always making pub style burgers despite pretty much every diner having flat tops? Waffle House and Steak and Shake are the only chains that are still around that have burgers resembling the time period they came from. While they aren't QUITE smash burgers they are close enough that you should be able to give said person a smash burger and the difference is negligible. I've tried pub style burgers many a times they just come out too dry. A meatloaf sandwich is unironically better than a pub burger.

>>19517663
I think they add way more oil to things now than before to substitute more expensive fats that they decided to skimp on.
Like they'll but the lowest quality mechanically separated meat that has 0 fat and then soak it in oil to give it some kind of moisture and fat.
Baked goods that call for butter are made with oil instead. Etc
Because oils are not nearly as good tasting, yet much cheaper, they just pile them on and add mystery flavoring to make it imitate the taste of the fat they're trying to replace.
Even popcorn butter at the movie theater is literally coconut and soybean oil with added flavoring and yellow dye
The more shit they add, the more disheveled the product looks, and when you actually chew a bite you can feel the oils separating from the rest of the food, as though you're chewing a sponge

>>19517838
>They have to use real quality ingredients nowadays.
If you care about "real quality ingredients" and eat at restaurants when you're not forced to you're doing yourself a great disservice

>>19518133
Pic related. Showing what kind of fat is used in foods with added fat (i.e., things you buy that contain extra fats such as fried products, baked goods, etc)
Not only has oil replaced other fats as an ingredient, its use has kept growing beyond the sum of all fats in previous decades. This only goes up to 2010 as well.
Basically everything is now made almost exclusively of oils, and there's more oil in it now that there would have been animal fats previously.

This is why that old product from your younger years just seems different when you tried it again recently.

I would rather have a smashburger over the 3/4 inch thick hockey puck patties that alot of places do these days.

>>19517705
>big tasty
I so want one of these again. I lived on these in college. They were $0.99 ea. Sadly they are discontinued here. So good, so sad. :(

>>19518194
Join the army, that's where they still have it in US, It's actually expensive now though.

>>19517608
They are brutally greasy these days. I have a boutique burger place a block from my house with a nice bar and patio and I can walk there. But, all their food is drowning in oil and their burger toppings are mostly fried eggs, avocado, greasy onion straws, oily caramelized onions, cheese that doesn't melt it just releases oil, on buttered buns with "hand cut" fries that are limp and single fried and full of oil. Makes me sick to even type this thinking about their food. Everyone else seems to love it. Makes me shit like a goose too.

>>19517608
>tastelet geriatric yells at clouds

go back to drinking your vanilla flavored nutritional formula shakes grandpa

>>19517608
Go to mcdonalds or some other fast food place. I'm sure they'll have the new and improved 1/6 lb hamburger for your little baby man mouth.

>>19518578
>dude... just slop my mouth up

Ooooo man nothing I love more than a sloppy burger that makes me want to slide my cock in it and give it a big ole kiss.

>>19517608
You're a tremendous faggot. Firstly, who goes to a restaurant to order one of the simplest meals on the fucking planet? Secondly, who goes to a restaurant to order the simplest of meals made in the most basic of fucking ways? If you want a lean and simple burger you can literally cook that shit at home for LESS effort than it would take to go to a restaurant for a fraction of the price. I have a slopburger once a year at most, but if I'm going to go to the effort of going to a restaurant and then ordering a fucking burger of all things, it might as well be the greasiest, tastiest motherfucker imaginable.

>>19517616
>complaining about hipsters in 2023

It’s been over a decade man

>>19517616
hate being able to buy fresh roasted beans that aren't burnt to shit

>>19520223
Who's talking about a restaurant you fucking faggot. Just going out, having a life, you get hungry, you need food, maybe there's a food truck or a local little place to eat. I just want a normal burger not a sloppashit greasy mountain, is that too much to ask?

>>19517608
there is a little too much meat on this burger (that could overpower everything else) but other than that it's perfect.
franchise chain burgers are trash and the patties are literally flavorless unlike this

>>19520597
perfectly greasy

>>19520597
>there is a little too much meat on this burger (that could overpower everything else)
When McDonald's almost costs more than Five Guys, I think a little too much meat (and maybe cheese) would not be uncalled for.
As it is, I feel like when I'm going to Mickey D's, I'm paying $23 for a White Castle slider and a tiny amount of crap fries cooked in soybean oil.

>>19517608
Wtf is with people thinking smash burgers are some new thing? Ever hear of white castle? They've been slinging smash burgers since before any of you were born

>>19520631
no one said they were new, but that they are more popular thesedays, are you retarded or deliberately posting dumb shit

>>19520631
>Wtf is with people thinking smash burgers are some new thing? Ever hear of white castle? They've been slinging smash burgers since before any of you were born
Until very recently, White Castle only existed on the east side of the USA, so it it is not unreasonable that literally half of the USA (millions of people) would not have had any experience with their franchise.

Amerisharts are just addicted to lard so naturally they will increase the meat and cheese percentage while phasing out leafs and tomatoes

>>19520649
>Amerisharts are just addicted to lard so naturally they will increase the meat and cheese percentage while phasing out leafs and tomatoes
Well, yeah. We are naturally inclined towards acting in a bigoted manner towards Canadians.

>>19520626
>I think a little too much meat (and maybe cheese) would not be uncalled for
it is when it's competing with homemade sub 10 minute burgers. when you make it at home you just use a scale and use the perfect amount of meat, for me it's 2x 65g. OP burger looks more like 2x 100g. at that point 2 patties barely make sense and all you taste is beef. as much as I love beef balance is everything

>>19520649
not an amerilard but I've made so many burgers at some point I realized that greens are not really worth it and if you get tomato it has to be small cherry tomatoes and even the best kind don't necessarily make a cheeseburger better, just a little different. bacon usually makes it worse. more than one piece of cheese per patty makes it worse.
caramelized or browned onions are the only topping that make a burger better without doubt but that takes a lot of time if you want to do it right

i made a yummy half pound burger today. i have concluded that a kaiser roll is the only bun option, but only if you're a tri state east coaster because you cant find good rolls outside of this area

>>19517608
i prefer brioche buns over disgusting sesame seeds buns
everything else you said i agree with

What brand of american cheese is best? They all taste like Kraft surely there must be better.

>>19520744
Potato bun is the best bun for burgers

>>19520764
nigga putting a burger in a potato lol

Eat faster before the grease drips everywhere. The flavor is more intense.

>>19520544
>not prepacking 3 burgers at home in ziplocs and storing them in your pockets for easy access throughout the night out on the town
not gonna make it bruv

>>19517980
Shake Shack is overpriced as shit for the same price I could go to a diner and get an actually good burger. Also their fries suck.

>>19517697
Lmao do you eat sirloin and call it a 'steak' too?

>>19520764
the burger hipsters do this, how is it compared to briosche bun? I fucking love briosche bun

>lean consistently shaped
Processed and low quality then, real food isn't always a fucking uniform shape. It's a God damn burger load it the fuck up, dig in and get greasy.
>ITS NOT WHAT IM USED TO SO ITS BAD, FUCKIN ZOOMERS! *cries*

>>19521343
nigga how bad are you at cooking that you can't form a round beef patty?

>>19517942
who wants a burger with water in it? how dumb are you? juicy has always meant fat.

>>19518214
STOP my penis can only get so erect!

>>19517697
Who the fuck dislikes beef fat?

>>19520631
you seem to not know what a smash burger is.

it's a wad of meat you place on a flat grill and smash flat then cook as normal.

white castle are preformed veal burgers with holes in them cookd on wet rehdyrated onions.

smashing a burger more than the first time squeezes all the juices out and ruins it.

>>19520763
this stuff, good luck getting some. it usually can only be purchased in cases of 6 5 pound packages.

>>19521566
IDK I can't figure out people who eat beef or pork but don't like the fat. hell if there was no fat in either I wouldn't eat it.

>>19517608
>When I was young,
that was what... a year ago?

>>19521590
I'm in my mid 30s, so I mean in the 90s early 00s

>>19521566
There's a difference between "mmm tasty fat" and "DUDE MY SMASH BURGER IS LITERALLY DRIPPING GREASY QUICK ADD MORE CHEESE AND SAUCE SO I CAN POST A PIC ON MY SOYSTAGRAM"

>>19517933
Fat is what keeps meat juicy. Meat (usually) isn't dry because there isn't enough water in it.

>>19521637
yeah burgers have all been the same, you must have been eating crappy burgers back then.

>>19521642
goddamn it now I have to change my undies again,

>>19521646
see >>19521642

>>19517980
>Hipster: shake shack, starbucks, IPAs
None of those things are remotely hipster.

>>19521562
>juicy has always meant fat
You're an idiot.

>>19521646
>wet isn't the opposite of dry
I bet you've never eaten a moist chicken breast, have you?

>>19517608
The best burgers are those thin, overcooked ones on a shitty plain bun you get at like a carnival or some other outdoor event in the summer.

>>19521680
This is what a soy-hipster would say

>>19517608
>orders smash burger that he doesn't like
>complains about not liking it
???

>>19523333
Yeah but the menu doesn't say smash burger you retard, it just says "cheese burger" or something

>>19517693
>picrel
yes
>t. nazi

Best burger is a simple slab (can be a little fatty) with some sautéed mushrooms, swiss cheese, and onion on a chewy, light bun (sourdough works, as does baguette or ciabatta). A bit of brown mustard goes a long way too.

>>19523559
>mushrooms

Hard no.

>>19523527
>Enter burger shop
>Can't see anyone cooking
>Can't see any burgers being garnished
>Can't see anyone eating

Even if this wasn't a smash burger it's still a bunch of red flags to leave.

smash burgers are dog shit lol. it has so much extra surface area for the grease to seep into because of the fanning out of the meat. no idea how it became such a big fad

Smashed burgers are the original burgers though. You just got fed a bunch of frozen pucks growing up and never grew out of them. Nothing wrong with them, I keep decent ones some in the freezer. But lean ones? You're eating fucking rubber.

>>19523625
I just want a burger so I order a burger, I'm not doing some gay ass sherlock holmes shit to find out the precise make-up

>>19523682
relatively lean, i.e. not dripping with grease you illiterate fuck

>>19523757
>admits to being clueless about food
good to see some honesty on here

>>19523765
I don't walk into the kitchen of every restaurant I eat at to inspect the food being cooked

>>19523762
What? 93/7?

>>19523649
word

>>19517887
Brioche is the worst bun for a burger frfr no cap

>>19524718
correct mah negro

>>19521705
ok then just soak your cooked burger in water.
you vagina blood fart.

>>19523226
Starbucks alone pretty much represents everything hipsters hate.

>>19523625
>can't see anyone cooking
Have you never been to a restaurant in your life? 99% of them don't have open kitchens.

>>19525387
Any decent burger joint has a kitchen you can see. Any decent restaurant has some way for you to see who's cooking even if it's just quickly around the corner so you know it's not a bunch of indians in the back not washing their hands.

>>19525469
>if you stand in front of the door to the kitchen you can catch a glimpse inside when the servers go in and out
>this is obviously intentional and any discerning diner should be standing in front of the door to the kitchen like a retard before taking their seat

Actually some of the earliest hamburger sandwiches were akin to what we now call smash burgers. During the depression they’re “smash” the beef onto a pile of thinly sliced onions to make the sandwich more filling for less money.

>>19525482
Kill yourself shit for brains. If the kitchen doesn't look like this why are you ordering a hamburger.

>>19525483
Yes, they're cheap, low quality, and fast, and have been sold in diners and fast food places forever. The stupid thing is that they've all of a sudden received this meme status in the last couple years that makes people think they're something special, or some lost art, so now you can actually go to real restaurants and (occasionally) find smash burgers, which is admitted really lame.

>>19525494
>why are you ordering a hamburger
Because I feel like a hamburger? What kind of question even is that?

>>19525501
>Because I feel like a hamburger
What kind of feeling is that? Do I need to be american to experience it?

>>19525527
In 1st world countries we have positive feelings. Feeling like a hamburger is a positive feelings. You wouldn't understand because you've only ever experienced negative feelings. Hunger is a negative feeling. Your desire to eat is the result of your negative feeling of hunger. Because we never experience anything beyond mild hunger, we have the luxury of desiring specific foods, and can go out and get them whenever we feel like it. And no, that doesn't mean we're all fat; you don't have to be hungry all the time in order to be healthy. That's pure cope and almost the opposite of the truth.

>>19525547
So it is slang for “I have cravings”?
Leaning another language really is a never ending task.

>>19525587
It's not slang. It's also not quite as strong as "craving", but depending on the context that's probably the closest word you'd use.

>>19525599
Thanks for the explanation. I was joking at first but ended up learning a new thing.
It may feel like common sense for native speakers but that’s certainly not the case for non-natives.

>>19525641
I'm American but have lived abroad for a few years and studied a few other languages. I get that English can be completely arbitrary sometimes. That said, "I fell like a burger" isn't some weird idiom; it's kind of just another way of saying something like, "I've been in the mood for Thai food lately".

>>19517608
It's called gentrification. Look at what happened to pizza and hot dogs and coffee, and is currently happening to ice cream

itt burgerqueer transphobes

>>19517608
Smash burgers have been around longer than your shitty lean patties, anon. We're returning to tradition and it makes you seethe since what you see as "tradition" is actually modern shit.

>>19525660
I was exaggerating a bit but even if I had an idea of what it meant, there’s a significant difference between assumption and confirmation.

you sounds like a psychopath. smashburgers have been around forever. and they taste good too. you’re just ranting about everything being soy

If you put sesame seeds on a brioche bun does it become a sesame seed bun?

>>19520391
we're still feeling the after effects

>>19517887
Kaiser rolls are so much better for burgers because they hold together and can soak up some the grease
brioche smush apart upon the first bite and by halfway through they sog out

>>19525853
>a bun that's precut into 5 slices will hold together better

>>19517608
Smash burgers are not fatty, and they are cooked well so the fat largely cooks off

>>19526008
Smash burgers are not fatty, but they are greasy. I.e., because they're cooked on a flattop the outside is usually covered in grease, and then they usually add way too much cheese and sauce, which is necessary because the patties themselves are dry, tough, and overcooked. Alternatively, a normal burger is going to have a nice sear on the outside but still have a tender, juicy interior. That makes smash burgers much more photogenic, but a much worse eating experience.

>>19520631
>white castle
>Smash burger
why do people talk so confidently about shit they have no clue about, kind of wild to me

>>19526070
to be fair, if you've never had a white castle slider, it can look like a smash burger.

That said, this entire thread is one anon intentionally bad faithing an entire argument because, to be fair, nothing he said was false, but was wildly inaccurate. It's like that cheese thread, some tard just wants to see people fight.

>>19517608
Preach brother

>>19517838
They could use rubber shoe insoles and everything could still technically be made of "real quality ingredients."
That means nothing.

>>19517616
>>19520391
I think its more people basing their entire personality around 1 thing

>>19525868
it can and dose

>>19517608
Just add some lettuce and tomato and wala

>>19517608
Do Am*rican'ts really?

here is my theory.
100 years ago, food looked like sloppa
then the industrial revolution brought mass produced, perfect looking food this brought praise as modern and consistent. this was appreciated. now everything is so processed and streamlined that this is seen as a bad thing

>>19527862
>tv dinner
>perfect looking food
retvrn fags should be fucking gassed

What's the ideal fat % for beef patties?

>>19526900
This

>>19528405
10

>>19517608
I agree with you except for brioche. I enjoy those buns.

>>19528999
And I agree with you except Brioche, its too soft.

>>19517608
>>19517608
the best burger i had recently was the patty melt from whatabuger which has a lot of sauce, meat, and cheese. if that makes me gross then so be it. their standard burger is boring.

>>19526736
Words have meaning beyond their most litteral definition, midwit.

>>19529213
correct

>>19529343
Huh?

I like a joocey boigah

>>19527862
>100 years ago
>then the industrial revolution

>>19526008
>>19526021
smash burger made by smash burger are dry as fuck and most certainly not greasy.

>>19517608
We can never go back.
t. Greatest Generation

>>19528405
25% no smashing while cooking.

>>19517608
a proper made burger should be no thinner than 3/4 inch. cooked to medium with 25% fat. never smashed or squashed when put on a grill or in a pan.

it should drip fat/juices, and make the bottom bun start to get soggy.

every time you bite in to it fat should squish out in a puddle on the plate so you can wipe it up with the burger before taking another bite.

you should have juices all over your chin and fingers when done eating it.

>>19531559
>smash burger made by smash burger
What the fuck is this even supposed to mean?

>>19531592
>it should drip fat/juices, and make the bottom bun start to get soggy.

wrong

>>19517608
You mean why is it so right

>>19531836
>sloppa shit, but with bread either side

>>19517980
>IPAs
This is the gayest thing about zoomers and hipsters

>>19531893
IPAs are boomer. Hipsters don't drink IPAs. You're either a zoomer or so flyover/basement dweller that your take is comically out of touch.

>>19531919
IPA is peak hipster you newblood

>>19531924
Maybe 10 years ago. It's sour hours now

>>19531924
>and then he said, "ipa is peak hipster"

>>19517608
borgar

>>19531928
we are talking about 10 years ago, hipsters were 10 years ago, IPA craze was 10 years ago, Hello? Are you awake?

>>19517608
I make my own.
1/6th lb is the perfect patty size, and if you want more cook two.

>>19528405
10-15%. Everything on either side has been mediocre.

>>19520659
But then who are tomatoes?

>>19532461
tomtantos

>>19517608
Shaddup eat a burger, have a coke and some fries
quit your bitchin

>>19520764
This anon Knows

>>19532524
disgusting

>>19517608
Lies. Modern burgers are the bestest.

>>19532524
bro put mirepoix and thin sliced onion on a crunchy sloppy smashburger stack. interesting concept but bad execution.

>>19521680
>IPAs are not hipster
lol, lmao

Go apply your build oil you tasteless fuck.

>>19517887
You are going to feel so bad about your wasted life when you discover potato rolls.

>>19520764
>Potato bun
like you slice a potato in half and use that as a bread substitute?

>>19532868
Yeah sure anon, that's what you do. You do that.

>>19532850
They're not, and never have been.

>>19533058
ipas?? yes they suck and they are hipster and hipsters also sucked and libtards suck too

>>19533058
They are and ALWAYS have been

>>19533058
>IPAs have never been hipster
They were the hipsterist hipster thing to ever hipster their way out of a small backstreet artisanal microbrew pub. They were as hipster as cereal cafes, beard oil and suspender. Literally everybody remembers this, and you're not fooling anybody by pretending you don't.

I'm actually more offended by the shitty cheese that instantly melts or worse comes melted. Gimme a slice of real cheese that stretches a bit but keeps shape.

>>19518214
Our town has all manner of precious bullshit like this. The local hayseeds love it

globohomo

>>19517608

I totally agree, while some """""premium"""""""" burgers are nice, I've always found the double quarter pounder with cheese (ordered without onions and pickles because they are disgusting) to be the perfect burger. Right amount of cheese, right amount of meat, right kind of buns. Clear in shape, uniform.

These smash patty burgers are disgusting. They taste of nothing, they are greasy and leave a nasty feeling.

ye we borgar

>>19517693
>They didn't put extra fryer grease and fat on my heckin fire seared, triple smash patty based burger.

>>19523559
Ridiculously excellent taste anon

>>19517627
Holy kek thank you for that chuckle

>>19535348
heeheehee

>>19517613
literally this, here's a burger from a new place down the street from me. It's literally perfect and during happy hour only $6.

>>19533081
That's not even remotely hipster. This >>19531936 is what actual hipsters look like. You're conflating reddit and instagram with "hipster" because you never go outside. Hipsters' entire "thing" is not to be trending or get upvotes. You're literally calling normie shit "hipster", when the foundational hipster philosophy is that everything normie is incredibly uncool. You can't bitch about how every bar and liquor store are two thirds IPA and then go on to claim that this incredibly popular thing is also somehow niche.

>>19535754
Take the L bro, the irony of hipsters always was they pretended their tastes were not mainstream

>>19517663
>>19517608
they literally used to fry burgers in beef fat retards. and smash burgers are based, just not the much instagram foodporn shit you've posted. those onions look great though

flame grilled

>>19536241
>they literally used to fry burgers in beef fat retards.
I suppose frying burgers in retards is illegal now

>>19535911
not him but,
mainstream among other hipsters, not normies. but yeah enjoy the self awarded W or whatever

>>19517608
naw you just a bitch ass pussy

>>19536367
t: greaselord

>>19517608
Honestly the burger in that pic looks unappetizing, but I think the problem you're describing can be solved by simply actually using lettuce, tomato, etc. They balance out any greasiness extremely well

I JUST WANT A NORMAL BURGER

>>19537057
You can't. We live in Amerigreaseville now

>>19517608
Brioche buns are god tier, you have no taste if you prefer shitty american bread

>>19517613
Hipster places make vegan impossible soy shit, these types of burgers are usually served at greasy spoons

>>19517616
Starbucks ruined coffee but you're right about beer, I just stick to Busch lite

>>19537720
Strange, from what I remember of hipsters they larped as poor white trash and drank pbr

>>19525828
No, we aren't. Hipsters and hipsterism were totally burnt out by 2016.

>>19521343
> real food isn't always a fucking uniform shape

Learn to cook. You have suitable quality control and standards it is very easy to make food look close enough to identical:

>>19532524
why couldn't this have been half the height, would have been totally fine otherwise

>>19537886
Umm it's gotta be instagrammable so all my fellow foodies can be impressed by my freakin' manly big boy burger that only cost $20 and contains gourmet ingredients, sustainably-sourced beef, locally-grown organic onions, and epic win. it's a culinary experience one does not forget!

McDonalds unironically has the best burgers who visits these gastropub $50 per burger places? They all shut down in my city

>>19517608
The brioche thing is next to the overwhelming sauce the ugliest..and it's cause of the costs. Wait a vew years and you will have untoasted whitebread sandwich slices. (cheaper). It's so gross you Americans don't do anything against everything what's wrong with your so called "food"(for humans) ich isnt even food for animals.

>>19538229
Brioche buns are high quality bread unlike regular american shit bread

>people still ranting about hipsters
dude all of the "hipsters" are like 35 now
young people today are all unironic wiggers

>>19538306
Yea 35yr old trannies

Making burgers tonight. What should I season the meat with?

>>19517608
The brioche bun is a genuinely good burger innovation

>>19538748
Wrong

>>19538550
Cum

love me a good burg

bun
meat
cheese
bbq sauce
onion rings
tomato
lettuce
fried egg
bacon
mayonnaise
pineapple slice
jalapenos
pickles
coleslaw
mushrooms
slice of avocado
kimchi
mac n cheese
peanut butter
scoop of chilli
and cream cheese

and thats it, bonapetito

>>19538834
>bun
>meat
>cheese
and that's it.

>>19525501
>Herro everyone!
>How are you? Fine, sank you.
>Oh my gah!
>I wish I were a hamburger.

>>19517608
For me, it’s god awful presentation. A burger should look like a well made sandwich not an uneven haphazardly threw together mess.

>>19538904
For you

If I can't fit it in my mouth, it's sloppa
If grease runs down my hand, it's sloppa
If the bread is mushy soaked, it's sloppa

Do you want to know what is even more disgusting? Moder niggers.

becuase you used to eat burgers from mcdonalds now you eat from home becuase inflation tard

>>19517608
All a burger needs is a beef patty, bacon, cheese, onions, mayo, ketchup, mustard, and normal buns. Fuck this fancy shit.

how do i make a black bean burger taste better without adding a slice of cheese

>>19539878
Throw it in the trash, and get a real beef patty.

>>19539880
okay so what do i add to make it taste good, without any cheese? i need to eat dairy free for the time being unfortunately

>>19539885
Maybe some anchovy butter. An egg. Something woth nutritional yeast in it. BLT and mayo. Prociutto or if you want to get really funky do country ham. You might want to soak the ham a bit depending on your salt tolerance. Don't worry, if it's good ham you're not going to soak away the flavor.

>>19532813
>the look on her face
kek

>>19525182
Man this
>apple
>watermelon
>celery
>tomato
>broth
>sauce
>perfectly cooked chicken breast

Is so >greasy<

Juicy and greasy is not interchangeable and if you think they are hand in your /ck/ card cos you're fucking baked mate.

>>19532813
Oh god this faggot is obnoxious thank god he fucked off to Dubai and only comes back to larp a few times a year

bun lettuce onion sauce patty cheese bun

For me, it's the bacon double cheese. The best fast food boigur.

>>19539798
Bacon is fancy shit, it's always like a $5 upcharge

>>19531919
>>flyover
>>out of touch
The vast majority of people live in flyover so out of touch with what?

>>19517980
Starbucks is the opposite of hipster, its basic white girl

>>19532206
>still mad about what hipsters liked 10 years ago
You are a 35+ year old boomer now. Accept it

>>19542675
Facts are facts, if you can't handle them it's not my problem

>>19542665
holy zoomer batman

>>19542649

Theres more land in flyovers but the majority of the population lives on the coasts. Thats why flyovers are out of touch.

>>19535392
that's a modern/meme burger

>>19543136
>>holy batman
Go back to redd it

>>19543411
That's just all the nonwhites, the vast majority of white people live in flyover, you're out of touch with white people

>>19535911
No they liked things that were hated ironically because they weren't mainstream

>>19535754
I get what you mean, the old brand of hipsters was liking things ironically then during the 2010s they just turned into soy boys

This thread has been going a week, and OP is still correct

>>19544018
Yea, theres a reason all these over priced "gastro pubs" are closing down constantly while fast food is still thriving

based

>>19545408
baaed on what?

>>19541907
Replace lettuce with pickle slice

>>19545580
>pickel

absolutely not

>>19535911
Lots of hipster things become mainstream like 10 years later, long after the hipsters have moved on to something else. You can't tell the difference because you only become aware of it after it's already mainstream. Protip: if you see someone wearing skinny jeans and a flannel shirt, and they have a beard and are drinking an IPA in a tap room, they're 100% not a hipster.

>>19537713
Greasy spoons, 24 hour diners, and neighborhood dive bars are literally the hipsters' bread and butter. You have no clue what you're talking about.

>>19538306
>all of the "hipsters" are like 35 now
35 is probably the youngest someone can be if they were ever a hipster. Hipsters stopped being a thing once smart phones and social media became ubiquitous.

>>19538896

>>19517608
>Burger
>Lean
Gross. Why would anyone want to eat a burger that's dry? You aren't eating it as a healthy food. It's a burger. It should be fatty and greasy.

>>19526900
I think it's more asocial shut-ins overreacting to every little thing they don't like.

>>19543853
Being a flyover doesn't somehow make you more of a "Real American" no matter how much you cope.

>>19546305
>>skinny jeans and a flannel shirt
They're definitely a hipster because that shit went out of fashion ages ago

>>19546466
Ofc it does, at least when it comes to white America

>>19546451
relatively lean=/=lean

also, lean=/=dry, lean to cook

>>19542676
Hipsters still exist. You're talking about the ones from 10+ years ago, which is irrelevant in 2023

>>19546698
but we're talking about the past vs. the future, that's literally the topic of the thread

you sound like a fag

>>19547043
DOOD GREASE SMASH CHEESE EXTRA CHEESE BACON BURGER EXTRA GREASE

>>19517663
Pat upper fubic area?

>>19517608
Cheeseburger tanuki

>>19546305
>skinny jeans and a flannel shirt
thats a hipster because thats two different fashions mashed together by a poser that doesn't understand why things are the was they were.

>>19517608

>>19518164
Good thing m*rgarine is dying at least.

>>19546480
I lived in Hawaii for years. It's the "least white" state, but is absolutely full of white people and white culture. I also lived in Chicago for a couple years and almost everyone I ever saw was white. You sound so retarded when you act like white people don't exist outside of rural areas. What would that even make "white culture"? Living in the middle of a soyfield, driving a big truck, shopping exclusively at Walmart and Cabellas, and going to church and Trump rallies for entertainment? That's the opposite of culture.

>>19518164
YIKES!! maybe OP is correct

>>19517608
I'm all for paper-thin manicured stack burgers like the McDouble but a classic burg patty should be thicker than your hand and make up 90% of the grease

>>19549047
>90% grease
The average american...

>>19517614

How did they ruin coffee?

>>19532461
It*lians
Those wops oughta see it coming.

>>19543440
>that's a modern/meme burger

I don't give a fuck, I know it's a restaurant chain from Denver. But it's still the best burger I've had in my city recently, perhaps ever. It is within top 3 burgers here and is extremely delicious. And for the price, there is not a better burger value in town

>>19517608
>make a 4 oz patty and use one piece of cheese
Burger.
>make 2 2 oz patties with a piece of cheese torn in half and smashed
>somehow less healthy and GREASY STACKS LOADED WITH GROSS CHEESE

you're a retard sorry to be the one to tell you

>>19550587
more surface area + grease on the cooking surface means more grease

I mean you can see the grease dripping, its gross

>>19550733
>grease
irrelevant if you are using saturated fats

>>19550757
but they don't

don't smash my burger
don't grease my meat

Allow me to end this debate: yes, burgers need to be JUICY (I.e. fatty, not greasy, big difference). When you render the fat out THAT is when they become disgustingly greasy. Kapischy?

>>19517608
my favorite smash burger place has been making them that way since 1946, you're a fucking idiot

>>19551061
?

>>19517608
you don't even know what a smash burger is.

>>19552663
i do know what a smash burger is

>>19537057
>I JUST WANT A NORMAL BURGER
a normal burger is a "greasy" burger. dry burgers are not normal.

>>19540243
we are talking hamburger not all that other stuff. tard.

>>19553355
juicy =/= greasy
juicy =/= dry

you retard

>>19548053
>>>/pol/

I will break it down for you mongs

>dry (negative connotation, not enough fat)
>greasy (negative connotation, too much fat)
>juicy (positive connotation, just right)

>>19553939
chicken breasts can be juicy if cooked correctly with no fat

>>19553953
joocey nigga

>>19528405
20

>>19554501
21

>>19517608
I never had this style of burger since they seem really unappealing, am I missing out?