/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>19512083
Pour it in your butt

>>19512083
Try weed

>>19512083
Learn to enjoy the taste of beer like the rest of us

>>19512093
gave me panic attacks and i felt like i was getting my body thrusted up on by demons.

>>19512101
god i wish that was me

>>19512083

just huff the alcohol with a bike pump dumbass. look it up.

>>19512083
Marijuana. You retard

>>19512093
>>19512119
Weed is trash

>>19512101
Try being less of a pussy

>>19512087
This actually works though, only really weird guys do it but it works

ice cold vodka mixed with Gatorade. used to be an infographic floating around on it. alternatively just chase vodka with something else.

>>19512083
Buy the alcoholic sodas or mix sweet drinks with it. But alcoholic sodas you cant taste the alcohol in. I cant imagine it would take much for you to get drunk so sodas or light drinks will do just fine.

>>19512121
nta but kill yourself

>>19512123
how to get colorectal cancer speedrun any%

>>19512083
Just don't drink, anything that significantly masks the taste of alcohol has too much sugar and will make your hangovers awful

>>19512146
If you drink a water after every drink and remember to keep up electrolites during drinking you will never get a hangover, suger is a diuretic so it makes you piss even more and dehydrate even more. For mixed or beers an equal amount water for the volume of drink consumed and you will never get a hangover. Also chugging a little extra water before bed helps too.
t. alcoholic pro

>>19512083
mix mid-shelf vodka and your fav fruit juice 1:1. then slowly try yourself down to either include more vodka, or to use ingredients of lower quality

You actually love alcohol, you just haven’t fleshed out the relationship with your vice of choice, yet. You’ll get there. You’re still early in the process, it’s going to be decades yet before you finally conquer the demon or succumb to it.

not much of a drinker OP but i enjoy a nice margarita or a gin and juice now and then. G&T is fine too, honestly most 2 part mixers are easy and cover it up

Buy a nice cider for yourself, sweet or semisweet, try some nice beers that aren't bitter like wheat beers/white beers. I used to think I hate all alcohol or all beer but I had to look around and find stuff I liked. A lot of good stuff from Europe and a lot of good domestic ciders, also pearies, cider maybe from pear juice

>>19512112
this is not an ironic post, i actually recommend this.

>>19512083
try GHB

>>19512083
Consider trying out magic mushrooms they're almost legal here in the states.

>>19513442
The problem with ghb is that is processed unlike some mushrooms which is quite natural.

With ghb you really don't know what your getting, it's like random shit from mexicans or niggers.

>>19512083
how old are you, nine?
low alco wine isn't far from grape juice
some kinds of fine sipping Scotch is almost honey
Jap fruit beers are like fruit juice
a lot of cocktails exist to drown alcohol in juice and sugar
fucking rum and coke or vodka and OJ is like babby's first binge

>>19513529
The thing with cocktails like seabreeze which is vodka is that it appeals to girls and gets them drunk so you can get into their panties.

>>19513518
Just make it yourself.

>>19513544
whatever
the point is that if OP is that much a pussy then go with that

>>19512083
Combine an ounce of vodka and butterscotch schnapps with a splash of vanilla extract, then pour a bottle of cream soda over that. You can add half an ounce of butterscotch schnapps and a splash of vanilla to a cup of cream and sugar to taste and whip it to soft peaks. Makes a good topping for the drink.

alcohol is really bad it damages every part of your body including your soul

>>19512083
Fireball tastes alright and somewhat high %
Use a coke/pepsi chaser if shotting it or mix it

>>19512093
This is the way. Try different types/etc. I used to like getting drunk too but the calories/etc really fuck you up. When I smoke sometimes I get mad munchies and end up eating way to much, but it is what it is.

When Im high I feel great. I go bicycling, walks, etc. And if Im not doing that I just chill inside and enjoy a movie or play video games. Helps me feel relaxed and good but without getting drunk as hell which can make you sick.

>>19512083
A little bit of Tullamore Dew is undetectable to my sister in Simoly Raspberry Lemonade, and she's usually extremely sensitive to that kind of thing.

>>19512083
Have you tried barbiturates

my dealer who hated being called a dealer and wanted me to call him a "plug" is in jail now so i cant get edibles

>>19512083
Everything gaba-nerg so GBL/GHB, benzos, barbiturates etc.

>>19512083
I don't like hard liquor but I do like beer so if I want to get really fucked up I'll do some shots of vodka and use beer as a chaser.

>>19512083
Just start snorting coke

Valium

>>19512087
fpbp, op likes taking it up the butt

>>19512083
If you don't care about getting really fat and spending a lot of money buy "Hard Seltzers"

>>19514099
This. People may say dude lmao weed but it really helps some people, myself included. It does usually just heighten the good feeling or bring me out of a stressful train of thought. Smoked a joint earlier while watching Redline, was sublime.

>>19512083
this is how alcoholism starts. You are pathetic.

>>19512083
Vodka cranberry

>>19516102
You have herpes LOL

>>19512101
Try smoking just enough to feel it, but not enough to get completely blasted. I personally enjoy that feeling more than getting trashed off drinks.
On a side note, I’d look into maybe seeing if you have generalized anxiety. I get this feeling based on your desire to get drunk immediately and the fact that you have panic attacks off smoking weed

>>19516115
Alcoholism starts when you depend on it to function.
This is just wanting a fucking buzz.

>>19512083
>What should I get to make it to not gag on the way down?
Go to an Adult Bookstore or something and buy those pills prostitutes use to numb their throats.

>>19516127
Alright, it's past your bedtime, junior, mommy's gonna unplug the router if you stay up.

>>19512083
do a shot or two of everclear or look into getting phenibut

>>19516268
>pills prostitutes use to numb their throats
...what?

>>19512173

Doesn't work the older you get fwiw. Doesn't matter how much water I chug, I'll feel it the next day if I go hard enough.

>>19512083
cat in bag

>>19512083
You can get the effects by being awake beyond 16 hours.

>>19512101
Why are 4chins posters such unsocial pussies?

>>19516102
d u d e

>>19512087
I only know this is a thing from all the doujins where people do it to lolis

>>19512083
closest thing to alcohol is GHB. you can try that

>>19512083

>>19512083
I mix it with flavorful sodas like Faygo.

>>19518312
Leave this cat alone

>>19512083

Throw a bottle of vodka in the freezer. Wait for it to be ice cold. Take it out. Get a shot glass. Fill it with your ice cold vodka Pour a glass of your favourite soda. Alternate between shots of vodka and chaser until you are sufficiently fucked up.

>>19512083
What kind of alcohol causes the least stomach inflammation? I like drinking a lot but I don't like my gut and intestines swelling up such that all digestive movement is painfully halted.

>>19512083
Throw the bottle in the freezer for a day or two, pour it over lots of ice, pour a glass of your favorite juice or soda or whatever, take a deep breath, hold it, pound the alcohol, and while keeping your breath held chase it with the drink. I love sour so I usually make a strong lemonade from concentrate with sugar and water. Sour helps neutralize the alcohol taste when you exhale.

>>19518377
Vodka or any other sufficiently pure ethanol-water mixture.

>>19512083
grain alcohol and lots of mixer

>>19512083
I've drank too much. My brain is filled with plaque, my psychophysiology is at a low point.

>>19519148
Not to mention my homunculus is all whack and my cortisol levels are abused. All I need to do is some exercise and cut back a bit.

>>19519160
>Not to mention my homunculus is all whack
Is that that thing that lives in vaxxies blood? You guys taking care of it now?

>ctrl+f
>no crams
/ck/ you're so fresh and summery!

>>19512083
It's an acquired skill. If you really want to be good at it you will need to practice often. There is no other way around. Start with lager, first drink four cans and increase the amount with two cans every time you drink.
I would prescribe you 4 times per month training schedule. Your goal is to be able to down 24 cans eventually and you can probably achieve this in few months.
You just need self discipline and drive.

>>19512083
Unironically find out what women drink. They seem to have a bunch of drinks where the alcohol taste is masked. Could also buy a "better" vodka like grey goose and mix that with cranberry juice.

>>19512130
If you smoked some weed you'd be too chilled out to say things like that. I smoke so much I don't even feel angry enough to say the nigger word anymore.

shut up retard

>>19512083
Lose dose of psychedelic drugs I guess.

>>19519233
>literally the first post

>>19519591
OP got filtered by weed, lol >>19512101
That'll probably kill him at that point.

>>19514375
>dealer
>edibles
I'm drunk, so it literally took me 5 minutes to remember that pot is still illegal in some places. Absolutely mind-blowing considering that alcohol is perfectly fine despite being way worse.

>>19520866
bro I was literally just thinking about this a couple hours ago, I watched that video where a cop basically rapes a dude on the street because he thinks he might have marijuana on him

>>19516102
>Smoked a joint earlier while watching Redline, was sublime.
Supreme taste. I think I know what I'll watch today after work. Making now some chicken butter curry to go along with the movie and the joint

>>19520866
>>19520928
who cares what utilitarian NPCs think about good drugs vs bad drugs, free all the drugs

>>19512146
OP can just use sugar free soda or something as a mixer. Lemon juice also hides alcohol taste exceptionally well.

>>19512083
A job
Nothing is better after a hard day's work than an icy cold beer

>>19512101
>i felt like i was getting my body thrusted up on by demons.
What the fuck is this supposed to mean? Like they were fucking your ass? What a weird thing to say

>>19518041
Not that anon, but getting paranoid smoking pot has nothing to do with being "unsocial" or a "pussy". I had tons of friends growing up and everyone smoked pot, but it took me years to realize that I didn't really enjoy it. I was the last person anyone would call a pussy when it came to drugs and alcohol, but pot always just made me paranoid and clam up and basically the opposite of chilling out and relaxing. I wish I enjoyed pot more, but alcohol is what allows me to turn off my mind at least a little bit. Pot just gives me a sensory overload and extreme anxiety around other people. I still think it should be completely legal even though I don't personally use it. It's great for the 99% of people who enjoy the effects.

ghb
good luck finding it. it's alcohol, but better. however it does taste worse.

Benzodiazepines is what you’re looking for, OP. It’s basically alcohol in pill form.

>>19522787
Aren't these extremely hard to get?

>>19512083
Just do vodka high balls.

>>19522843
Not if you doctor shop. There’s doctors out there who will give you a script if you tell them you tried antidepressants before for your anxiety and they didn’t work for you (because they really don’t). Just have to find one who is older typically and not as afraid to prescribe them.

>>19522843
no.
i literally told my doctor once that i was anxious on flights and how my girlfriend gave me one of her valium and it helped a lot. he just wrote me a script for like 30 xanax one time. which is all i need i mean i legitimately wanted them for flying.

but you could do the same thing. look up what they're used for. sleep problems is a common one. complain about the symptoms but don't suggest anything. be able to answer questions about it. don't suggest the drug otherwise you can be labeled as drugseeking.
you might have to get a couple scripts filled, then complain about some side effect, until you get the one you want.
once you have a script that works, you can go to any doctor anywhere with the bottle and they'll write you the same thing again.

>>19522920
yeah i'd do anxiety instead. much fewer drugs work for that so you'll get benzos pretty quickly.
avoid turning it into a habit. benzo withdrawal is one of the ones that can kill you if you cold turkey it. have strict rules around use and do not ever break them. no one becomes an addict intentionally, you just slip up enough times and you realize that you've become one.

>>19521142
hmm maybe cola chicken and some of the boof I've been saving for a rainy day.
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/VrL1hr4db6k

Realize there's more to life than being intoxicated

>>19523007
Nobody suggested anywhere in this thread anything to the contrary. Stop projecting.

>>19515265
Sounds like a projection to me

Lots of projection itt

>>19512101
>i felt like i was getting my body thrusted up on by demons.
damn I need to try weed now!!!

>>19523007
Some people may as well never be considered sober no matter how clean they actually are. Remember all the kids who just had naturally terrible memory in primary school, like they were born stoners?

>>19512083
Mixed drinks. Stop trying to drink it straight. Vodka mixed very well with iced coffee for example. Take a big glass, like one you'd drink water out of, pour 1/4 cup of vodka and the rest iced coffee, if you can't get that down then I can't help you.

>>19512253
>Buy a nice cider for yourself, sweet or semisweet
As someone that doesn’t like the taste of alcohol cider is the most tolerable for me - yes the sweetness is extra calories but you’re already getting extra calories from the alcohol itself.

>>19523361
>all the kids who just had naturally terrible memory in primary school
Literally me. And Einstein. And like half of everyone who went on to become an incredibly successful thinker/artist/innovator.

>>19512083
what you want is a brass monkey my friend. It'll get you right ripped, but itll taste like oj. Its a poorman's screwdriver.

>>19512087
Based boofposter
>>19512083
You kinda just get the hang of it.

>>19523501
I kneel...

technically, you can insert a bottle of vodka in your ass and drink it that way
you'll get wasted in no time

weed makes me feel like I'm fucking dying

>>19523501
Einstein had already made original contributions to science at 13

>>19512083
if only there were an entire industry subset devoted to this conundrum

>>19512083
There are plenty of sweet drinks and sweet wines that barely taste of alcohol. I can’t stand bitter flavors and beer makes me bloated but I still drink them from time to time because I hate myself.

>>19512083
Light liquor on fire in a glass, cover the glass (with another glass) to snuff the flame out, lift up the top glass and snort the fumes. Actually a lot of fun (I normally drink the warm booze too)

>>19525398
What like seltzers?
Actually, shit.
Why hasn’t anyone suggested seltzers?
OP go buy some whiteclaws and see how you like it.
It’s a fruity 5% abv seltzer, a little stronger than a lite beer but doesn’t taste like beer.
Still tastes mildly of alcohol but it’s definitely not as awful tasting as beer or as strong tasting as spirits.

>>19518308
Example

>>19512083
I personally recommend this brand of moonshine. all their flavors taste really good and it has really high abv so you get fucked up pretty quick on it. the apple pie flavor is my favorite.

any flavored vodka like smirnoff or rum like malibu are also good picks.

mix with something sweet
>>19512093
>>19512119
kys fucking retards weed is nothing like alcohol, its almost ther opposite

>>19525584
>any flavored vodka are also good picks
There's literally no flavored vodka on the planet that is a good pick.

>>19518377
eat before you drink

>>19522843
You can order phenibut online. It's alcohol in pill form but without the side effects. You won't feel fucked up if that's what you're looking for but 1g on an empty stomach in the morning will keep you buzzed for the entire day. Don't do it often though.

>>19525663
Do not advise anyone to take phenibut and go about their day you absolute fucking mongoloid lol
He can’t even handle alcohol and weed.

>>19525673
its way easier to handle. need to be disciplined about dosage and keeping it for the right occasions, but as far as the effect goes a lot of people say they dont even feel it lol

>>19512083
inject it directly into your veins via IV cannula

>>19525791
Kek I thought you were calling him an Italian slur but that’s a legit medical device

>>19512083
it's an acquired taste

>>19526656
Sexually acquired

>>19512083
Snort lemon juice first. You can neck a fifth of vodka without tasting it at all if you do it before the pain subsides.

>>19512083
get a bottle of vodka, Either make vodka watermelon , inject it or soak a tampon in it and shove it up yer arse

>>19512083
Drink 1000 beers. Then you are used to the taste.

>>19519525
You sound like one

>>19528535
don't do this you'll die

>>19512101
How so? Weed is so relaxing

>>19512083
jesus how old are you?

>>19512083
ketamine

bad sleep and lots of blue light

>>19512083
Get a coconut rum, mango rum, orange juice, and grenadine. Mix half and half both rums halfway up the glass. Then a 1/3 OJ and a splash of grenadine on top. Enjoy! Or stop being a fucking faggot and make an Old Fashioned.

I just drank alcohol for the first time. Bailey's irish cream, about 1/3 cup, diluted with a cup of coffee and a splash of extra cream. Went light because on its own it tasted like poisoned chocolate, not used to that. Will that be enough to give me a "buzz" or whatever its called?

>>19512083

Lately my drink of choice has been Arizona watermelon fruit drink with Luksusowa Polish potato vodka. I like that the Arizona has no caffeine or carbonation and is just $1.00 per 23oz can and Luksusowa is really smooth/silky and only $13.00 a fifth.

>>19531021
>Luksusowa is really smooth/silky and only $13.00 a fifth.

>>19512083
buy crown royal apple

buy ginger ale

mix them with ice

you wont even taste the booze if you mix to your liking

but you will in fact get drunk

/thread

>>19531020
Probably for your first time. I got absolutely loaded the first time I drank, but I was an idiot and too 3 shots of Wild Turkey before we headed out to a house party my freshman year of college. If only I knew that would be the beginning of my downward spiral.

>>19512083
Drink more alcohol

you could try drinking kava, it's like alcohol, less toxic, doesn't make you retarded and tastes worse. apart from the taste i'd say it's a straight upgrade over alcohol

>>19512083

how about benzodiazepines? if you can get yourself some lorazepam (ativan) or clonazepam (klonopin) you get the same comfy feel as you do when you get drunk (since both of them relax your central nervous system) but you don't get the downsides. lorazepam especially is a very well rounded benzo, it has a medium long half life. it comes on quite smooth and goes off quite smooth. clonazepam is similar but effects last longer, it's not as strong

I would avoid alprazolam (xanax) because it has a short half life, and generally won't make you feel that great. it's good for people with anxiety, it works well for that but to get blasted on xanax you are very close to falling asleep/losing your consciousness. benzos are all safe drugs in that if you don't mix them with opiates or alcohol, it's almost impossible to overdoes. the LD50 values are so high that you most likely can't even get your hands on enough of them even if you had a prescription

in the US there is a risk of getting fentanyl if you buy it from the streets, in europe you can buy "galenika" branded fake benzos, there's ksalol (alprazolam) and rivotril (clonazepam), it's a shame the operation that made the fake roche rivotrils has disappeared, they used to be extremely good value for money. I've probably consumed like 3000 of the rivotrils and about as much of ksalol since it's more widely available. difference is ksalol knocks me out so it's good for a sleep rhytm reset tool but it makes me feel like shit in the morning, rivotril doesn't. it will feel like I'm a little high the next day until it smoothly wears out

just remember the tolerance gets higher so don't get addicted to them. I used to start out with like 6mg of clonazepam, later on I could take 20mg or 30mg and I'd still have a little trouble falling asleep. meanwhile 15mg of alprazolam will knock me out and I find myself waking up after falling on the floor

>>19512121
>Thinking the weed makes you tough
LMAO I'd like you to spend the weekend with me and see if you make it out without melting your brain. Stop acting cool zoomer.

>>19512101
I used to be a pothead but now when I smoke I think about how me and everyone I love will die one day and how I’ll handle life without the people who raised me
Fuck weed

>>19535726
Those are realities we all have to face regardless. Weed has nothing to do with it. It's okay, comfort yourself.

>>19518030
sir I think thats called "drinking too much", that strat has its limits, it doesnt make you completely immune

>>19531021
this stuff is 95% HFCS and water

>>19512083
Jello shots all the alcohol less taste. I'm also told you can buy vodka powder and add it to food like a a burger or hot dog .

>>19518308
Same but with shotas

>>19512083
try pure GABA. will relax you a lot and isn't unhealthy. but won't get you as talkative as alcohol does

>>19535726
Based GAD haver

>>19538081

As in supplement form? Doesn't that stuff not really do anything because it doesn't cross the BBB? Just what I've heard.

>>19512083
Barbiturates

>>19512101
I used to have this problem. was the reason I quit smoking before the end of highschool. like the other anon said, try smoking less. my problem was I'd pack a whole bowl and smoke it alone and get paranoid as shit. I thought you had to smoke at least a bowl at a time, which with hindsight was really fuckin stupid to think...

but these days, I admit to myself that I'm just a fuckin lightweight, and if I take a small puff or two tops, I get the high without the paranoia.

>>19539518
Not him, but the reason I always ended up smoking too much was because I was vaping oil. I didn't want to smell up my apartment and ofc i did too much. Is there any scent free ways to take small amounts of thc?

>>19512083
Options:

GHB, Phenibut, Benzos

You risk addiction and fucking around with some illegal substances though. I know benzo withdrawals, like alcohol, can kill you.

You can also try pinching your nose while you take shots. Don't know why it hasn't been mentioned yet. Olfaction and taste deeply linked.

Or the other option, far less glamourous I know, is to deal with whatever shit is bothering you without relying on drugs. Sounds like you have some emotional problems to contend with first. Trust me, I've been there, trying to find fringe drugs/supplements to deal with emotional problems. They're all just band aid solutions that offer temporary peace. Fight your spiritual war, vanquish your dragons, and you'll be far better off.

>>19512083
I recommend zinfandel, It's very sweet wine that tastes like a soda. I can chug a bottle to have a good time, and 2 if I want to neck

>>19512083
take one sip and say "wow thats really going straight to my head" works the same for any percentage.

ask the operators to turn up and down your parameters respectfully.

>>19518308
I need to see a sample of this

>>19512083
The favorite drink of pedophiles everywhere

drink gin and tonic or vodka with orange juice, the tonic water/orange juice covers the alcohol so you get drunk without gagging

>>19514099
>This is the way

crown royal with diet coke.
i do 4oz whiskey in a pint glass with a couple big ice cubes

>>19512083
Lol drink wine or sparkling wine (Italyzñ Spain, Portugal and France)

>>19512101
Good, don't touch that shit, can fuck your life up.

>>19512087
Is there commercial buttplug dispenser?

>>19525584
>malibu rum
yes

>moonshine
fuck no

>flavored vodka
ROFL

>>19514375
technically he both since u buy drugs off him and u let him plug ur ass.

>>19512083
any girly drinks. Mike's is ok

>>19512083
Amanita muscaria mushrooms will get you drunk like feelings without the need to drink alcohol.

>>19512083
I hate the taste of alcohol and can detect it in small quantities, but White Russians are pretty good.

>>19512083
>Me after drinking a pint of vodka and getting ready for the next.

>>19539579
edibles/drinkables, tinctures etc

>>19512083
cheap shots of vodka with an ice cold soda chaser. It's literally that easy.

>>19512101
I got into delta 8 because real weed is illegal in my state. It's a mild weed high that only lasts 3 hours at most. At first I felt it was a cleaner high than real weed, no hangover fogbrain. But eventually I started getting anxiety attacks while vaping it, unless I drank too. Alcohol + d8 = very fun, no anxiety. I stopped completely when I vaped it on a work night, no alcohol, to help sleep. I woke up in the middle of the night. mind racing. Started seeing a random nonsensical image of myself opening a car door and getting inside. Literally only that image over and over. I could not stop thinking of this nonsense image. I thought I was having a mini-seizure, which made the panic attack worse. I don't touch the stuff anymore. I think being left-handed, means being scatter-brained (non-lateralized brain function). Which makes me more susceptible tripping balls. Just my theory

>>19512123
>This actually works though
That's why it was suggested dumbass

>>19525621
This. Just mix vodka with whatever juice or soda you like. Flavored vodka is terrible.

>>19514099
>When Im high I feel great. I go bicycling, walks, etc.
kys

>>19512093
No retard you mix with benzos. KYS stoner faggot

>>19512101
Don't smoke, that's a sign you can become schizo if you continue. Weed literally is a gateway to schizo, and in men schizophrenia generally shows in your 20s and both drugs and genetics contribute to development, with marijuana and psychedelics being the highest contributors

>t. professional schizo wrangler

>>19543007
>made it to 30s non-schizo
phew