/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>19471525
Sounds like your coworkers are keen at finding the retard in the room.

they were planning on stealing your sandwiches and you thwarted them

>>19471525
bro, cool it with the autism. part of being tolerated at work is behaving within a set of norms. if you dont play ball, then you're going to be 'that weird guy'.

Eating like a pig is almost as bad as being a picky eater. It reflect on your entire character and makes people around you recognize what a stunted, boring, and uninteresting person you are.

>>19471525
This wouldn't happen if you weren't such a fat pigman. Lose some weight and eat a salad for once.

>>19471593
But i don't make a mess of my plate and i always make sure lone pieces of chicken never fall out of my sandwich

>>19471609
I ain't fat. I'm quite healthy for my size

>>19471525
You're that guy. I have a friend and used to work with him. He didn't chew, just ate like a starving dog. We'd go to lunch and he would eat a $25 plate in five minutes and be all squirmy and asking if I was ready to go, let's get going, all before I had my third bite. My wife does this to a lesser degree. I'll admit that maybe I'm a slow eater, but holee sheeeit some of you retards need to just slow down and chew and enjoy the little things in life like a good meal. I'm getting old and I've learned that as time goes by, good things come to you less and less. No more naked hot young chicks in hot tubs, no more risky adventures or rippin parties. Just the ever increasing march of time towards eventual death and eternal slumber. Slow down. Enjoy a meal. Appreciate the company and the time you have.

>>19471624
But i do. That's my entire point

>>19471525
Why are you working with people that aren't afraid of you?
Make them fear you.

>>19471525
I'm a fast eater and this shit pisses me off. My gf is always complaining when we eat together and I always finish my meal sometimes before she even takes a bite.
Worst part is if you're eating with a large group of people and you finish first people start piling their food onto your plate thinking you want more then get pissed when you don't eat it. I usually leave a little bite on the plate while I wait for everyone else to finish.

>>19471645
Just say "no thanks I'm full" you drooling autist.

>>19471650
>he thinks it's that easy
I always say that but people will do shit anyway. You've clearly never had a pushy aunt or grandma who keeps piling food onto your plate well after you're finished eating.

>>19471658
Don't let no dumb bitch big league you.

>>19471609
Most people who eat like this aren't fat at all, quite the opposite. If you haven't noticed fat people eat very slowly. They take great pleasure out of eating and want to make it slow as possible

>>19471624
Shut up and eat, faggot

>>19471525
Just eat slower. Eating quickly implies you don't want to spend time with anyone who's with you, during the meal. You're trying to get out of there as fast as possible to avoid human interaction.

Pace yourself, talk to a friend, it'll be more satisfying.

You need to establish dominance. Next time they try to mock you go HAHA YEAH I MOTORBOAT PUSSY EVEN FASTER LADIES IF YOU NEED A DEMONSTRATION THERE'S A QUEUE EVERY FRIDAY 5PM AT MY CUBICLE BUT SHOW UP EARLY I'M ONLY DOING IT FOR THREE HOURS TOPS

>>19471525
You are unable to process the complex flavors of a meal eating like that. If someone put a blindfold on you you'd be unable to decipher what you were eating.
Flavor is one of the best experiences to enjoy and prolong, scarfing down food is akin to admitting you'd be fine with goyslop tubed directly down your throat

>>19471621
Is that size fat?

>>19471525
I have never seen a thin person eat quickly. Chew your fucking food.

>>19471621
Why the fuck are you eating two sandwiches unless you're a bodybuilder or other athlete then? Fat as fatass

>>19471593
not being picky with your food is pig-eating behaviour pal. it means you will eat basically anything and thus literally have no taste

>>19472492
Nobody cares unless your picky about normal shit. Like food touching or not eating lettuce.

>>19471525
I used to be a fast eater and I got the same shit.
>>19472407
I was thinner when I was a fast eater on my teens/early 20s. My bmi was like 21~22.

>>19472492
This is what picky eaters ALWAYS say. Having preferences and being a picky eater are not the same thing; they're basically polar opposites.

>>19471668

>>19472507
The problem is that I’m picky about everything, not only food. For example when I got some decent headphones everything else started to sound like shit, or the fact that I can’t be out in the sun without sunglasses because the light is too strong.

>>19472539
That's not being picky.

>>19472539
>Cant handle the sunlight.
Never procreate your genes must be eradicated.

>>19472556
I work in the fucking sunlight. If I lived in a colder area of course I wouldn’t mind the sun.

>>19471668
He ordered two sandwiches, Anon

>>19471884
Cringe post lad

>>19472570
Two sandwiches isn’t a lot.
T. 75kg 1.8m

>>19471525
>parents would fight at the dinner table for years before they finally got a messy divorce
>develop a habit of eating quickly so I can slip away as soon as possible
>still scarf down my food to this day

>>19471525
first time being around other people? you gotta eat at the same pace as them same as if you're walking in a group or something, you dont want to lag behind or be the powerwalker blasting off from the group. just act normal for 5 minutes and you'll be good
>>19472716
i do this by nature but you gotta pretend in public baka

>>19471525
The best reply:
"Sorry, my sammie levels were critical and i didnt have time for breakfast"

Prolonged explaining of how fast eating is chadded out or whatever will make your little puzzle piece shake a little too loud to remain hidden