/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>18819266
Its obviously dtf, bro.

>>18819266
Did you use cake flour and not knead it at all?

looks like a cake

>>18819266
tell us your process so we can know how you fucked up so bad

>>18819266
because you made hole wheat bread

>>18819266
too much dick

>>18819266
that bread is a man

>>18819300
heh

>>18819266
Warm ball pouch. And edible!

>>18819269
>>18819296
4 cups whole wheat flour
Pint of water
Yeast pack
Tablespoon honey
Teaspoon salt

Proofed yeast with honey in the warmed water, then mixed with the flour and salt (which I had sifted together). Kneaded it until it was plump and well incorporated
Let rise for an hour covered by a hot damp towel, rewarmed towel and placed dough in a bread tin and let it rise for another hour. Baked for 15 minutes at gas mark 7 (425F), then for another 40 minutes at gas mark 4 (350F).

>>18819300

>>18819300
im gonna fucking kill myself

>>18819333
It looks like your yeast was dead and there’s literally a pocket of moisture under the hole.
Not sure if u really tried to make bread or u actually just fucked and came into that loaf of bread.

>>18819438
It puffed up well everywhere else, just not in the centre
>did you actually shag it
No, just thought it was a funny thread name

>>18819487
But it’s not very airy overall?
Perhaps you overkneaded it after proofing? I’m not sure. Definitely not sure about the fuckhole either

>>18819266
It's so you can make cream filled bussies.

>>18819540
I kneaded for about a minute and a half. Just what was necessary to get all the dry flour mixed in with the water.

>>18819730
Lad I would just try again with some fresh yeast and see what happens. I really don’t know what to tell you. It almost looks as if there was a pocket of moisture in there that created a steam bubble, hence the undercooked looking part under the butthole.

>>18819266
God it’s just ASKING for it

>>18819266
batter/dough too wet

one time when I was a kid I was really horny and tried to make one of those cornstarch fleshlights from the image that gets passed around here (I think I found it on /v/) sometimes, there was noone else in the house for the afternoon.
I didn't have any container that would be ""thrustable"" so I just used one of the house cups from the kitchen.
It was in the middle of "solidifying" but I got a text from my parents that they would be coming back sooner than they expected. I panicked, prematurely took it out and it was kind of half solid, half oobleck, and I warmed it up in the microwave for some reason (I guess I wanted it to be warm). I tried to fuck it really fast and made a mess all over my bed because it was still partially liquid, and I finished despite how shitty it was, because I was a kid and I would be able to ejaculate from a light breeze. I was scared that they would be home soon so I ran downstairs, lightly washed the cup then put it back in the cupboard and went back upstairs
Im pretty sure the cup I impregnated is still being used in their house today all these years later, and I regret not just throwing out the cup (or not trying to make the cornstarch fleshlight in the first place)

>>18819266
It's literally the perfect bread for eggs in a basket

>>18819300

>>18819266
m8 don't make whole wheat bread.
What you do, is add a small amount of whole wheat flour to white flour.
I add about 150 grams of whole wheat flour per loaf. that's all you need to do to get enough fiber in the bread.
white flour is superior to ww flour.

>>18819333
Not enough kneading. Also not enough time for the whole wheat flour to hydrate which combines with the lack of kneading to mean not enough gluten development. Also looks underproved and not cooked for long enough, though the cooking time is somewhat dependent on the prior steps.

Did you give it a crumbpie? UwU

>>18819300
Sometimes i hate this board somuch

>>18819300

>>18820283
Why did you post a picture of a duck?

>>18819300
hue

>>18819300
Omg

>>18819333
>Proofed yeast with honey in the warmed water
Proofing yeast is useless thanks to modern zymurgy.

>Baked for 15 minutes at gas mark 7 (425F), then for another 40 minutes at gas mark 4 (350F).
Your bread looks undercooked, yet you cooked it for nearly an hour. Also, I dunno why you did high temp then low temp. Seems pointless to me.

Nick Avocado's bread

>>18819300

>>18819266
it's consenting

>>18819300

>>18819300
Ayo! Where my Carlos at?

>>18825955
Bros, is fucking your bread any good?

>>18819266
That's not supposed to be banana bread?