/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>18360038
you posted the only one, friend

>>18360038
Based Surly poster

>>18360038
I'll have to eat my way out

>>18360038
>HOW?!?!

also, my sunbmission to the jury

dumping my *.webms

rispek to my swede fren who made most of them

>>18360296
Why does she look dead inside

>>18360301
it is a sex worker
there are more vids of pat&cat but they're nsfw

>>18360317
But she has all those hot dogs... how could you be sad with so many hot dogs?

>>18360038
How often do you guys think he washes or changes the spoon and cup?

>>18360322
true, i'm from where she's from and hotdogs brings sun into life


... idk why she sad
https://www.dailymotion.com/video/x10u4c3

>>18360338
I don't think he is familiar with those concepts

>>18360259
>don’t recognize this one
>see ring on finger
>immediately close webm
Many such cases.

>>18360338
not much, he probably doesn't do it..
his paki wife does it for him and then give him top tier kamasutra sex for selling the eggs

>>18360359
/ck/ is ja/ck/
/ja/ck is /ck/
such is life

Who has the one of Nigel in a maccas eating like 10 stacked big Macs?

Waiting for ja/ck/ to bring out the claws

>>18360038
thinly veiled jack thread

>>18360038
still the top

>>18360456
They're supposed to be related to food & cooking

>>18360505
???
But it is a video of a cooking appliance

>>18360283
I know that kitchen. Is this Jack pre-stroke?

>>18360038
How does he get in?

>>18360533
Nice

>>18360573
Yes.
But it wasn’t a stroke.
It was a failed suicide attempt fyi

>>18360391
Based

Can someone post the tf2 remake of that french fry pot webm?

>>18360607
That woman should be shot.

>>18360038
How does he get out?

>>18360737
what came first? the egg man or the egg fort?

>>18360038
We're two weeks away from this video being a decade old. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B9ahyPmDb7c

>>18360607

Never mind that horrid slop what the fuck is wrong with that mise en place

>>18361013

>>18360607
the heat from the doritos cooks the styrofoam

>>18361013
What the fuck was on that paintbrush
It looks like actual paint

>>18360277
at a building: 500$ plus tip
at a market: 6 dollars

>>18360290
>>18360296
most culinarily literate woman

>>18360290
Tranny food

>>18360347
God I want her to speak french with my bawls in her jaw

>>18361222
absolute retard

>>18360737
every morning a new man hatches from one of the eggs

>>18361290
Eww

>>18361287
sui fuel

>>18361299
I miss pangzai I think chinese government killed him.

>>18361299
It is so fucking pathetic watching a grown man do shit like this.
12-year-old's idea of cool.

>>18361336
You could not be more jealous

>>18361184
Thickened sourcream?

>>18360607
>>18361004
>>18361013
>>18361015
This is like watching a child at a mongolian bbq place add every single item and every single sauce to their bowl.

I love seeing how upset people get by dorislocos.

>>18360277
why are you chopping up a fucking bratwurst asshole

>>18361222
>if you dont like something, just call it a tranny thing
the amount of fucking videogames called tranny games and the term tranime is retarded, the people constantly thinking about trannies are more annoying than the trannies themselves

>>18361483
Ymnbaw

>>18361525
go to bed im fucking tired of you shits and trannies

>>18361290
the heat from the batter cooks the snoil

>>18361290
>0:15
Ah, so this is what they do with aborted babies?

>>18361534
Go back to fucking reddit, tranny retard.

>>18361525
kek

>>18361554
>everyone who questions be is a tranny
You're just as bad as the libtards. Fuck off.

>>18361290
I have seldom been this angry.

>>18360038

>>18360038
Why does he look so afraid?

>>18361588
this kek

>>18361571
wasn't this shit a comically fat person on tv would do in the 90s

>>18360038
Why's he so surly bros?

>>18360607
>American 'cuisine'

>>18360038
There are two sides to every story anon

>>18361639
these videos are for the absolute dumbest people.
it's a pile of dirt where there's another pajeet sitting on the other side
same goes for all the fish videos where they throw coke and mentos into a hole and a dead catfish comes out

>>18361657
>i want my husband to divorce.webm

>>18360607
this is literally prison/county jail food.

>>18360533
cringe

>>18360986
>>18361291
kek

>>18360296
Well I really wasn't expecting to see Ariel Rebel in this thread but I appreciate seeing her fat ass anyway.

>>18360607
Why does it just keep going and going and going? Every time I think they're done they slop on another load of nonsense.

>>18361013
>>18361015
>make a meal
>make a second meal on top of the first meal
>make a third meal on top of the second meal
Why?

>>18361290
I don't really know anything about cooking, I just like looking at the pictures, but this person appears to have made some sort of vague slop?

>>18360607
God bless America

>>18361548
>>18361551
Ah the trash smoked triple olive pizza, a delicacy in the boonies of Brazil

>>18361636
This is like when Marco Pierre White says "a dash of olive oil"

here is something new

>>18361639
>this is my hole! it was made for me!

>>18361919
>>18361657
racewar cant get here soon enough

>>18361855
legend

>>18361872
They heard you like eating so they put a meal in your meal so you can eat while you eat.

>>18361850
>tries to flourish
>rips a hole in the dough and tries to pretend he didn't quickly

>>18361855
dabbed on

>>18361877

>>18362071
funny if you have the sense of humor as a 10 year old

>>18362258
kek

>>18361299
try hard.

>>18362263
AKA joy de vivre

>>18362270
Won't those chips be completely soaked and gross?

>>18362290

don't think the Brits bloody give a shite, m8

>>18362279
no u

>>18362366
We're where going we won't knead flies

>>18360737
The egg fort was built around him

>>18361290
I recognise the shitty backdrop, does Kay have legit mental issues or something, or is she just playing up the stupidity for youtube fame now?

>>18361648
white hand though

>>18360607
>Cuts the Dorito bag with care and places the chips with tongs, as if they were an expensive ingredient to treat delicately so they don't go to waste.
>All for some spic sloppa.
That shit drives me up the fucking wall for some reason.

>>18362416
>that hand
>white
good morning

>>18360038

I fucking hate my life. The degree to which I hate my life is equally as strong as how fucking god-damn delicious these eggs are. I am the best egg cook in the world, you don't even realize. Here, eat this, it is the best. I hate my wife and children. See all the eggs on display. You will come here to eat again. God, I hate this country.

>>18361542
no those generally get sold in panamanian """""stem cell"""""" clinics

>>18361919
There is a spine like a piece of plastic and a beak in those things, there is no chance this is even sort of a pleasant eating experience. That's to say nothing of how bad it has to taste. Pure cruelty and nothing else

>>18362443
whats with the quotation marks? do they eat the baby?

>>18362258
>>18361877
genuinely accurate to most of /ck/'s users

>>18361548
I'm gonna throw up.

>>18361877
>>18362258
haha

>>18361548
>>18361551
This is missing the crucial middle section, the baking. With garbage.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-e5gTx1fVU4

>>18360456
I would def make sex-O on her

>>18361611

>>18360038
I watch this webm every time it's posted on any board, it's like a compulsion.

>>18361004
>here it’s not wet enough yet
>just a biiiit more wet
>and a bit more for flavor
>the chips are fucking floating

>>18362627
What other boards does it get posted on?

>>18362640
It's a regular on /tv/ for one, seen it on /v/ /tg/ and /sp/ too

>>18361017
Underrated

>>18361551
The way he limp wristed throws those three olives on at the end like it’s the finishing touch while he’s trying to look like a nbd badass has me in hysterics, I can’t stop rewatching it fucking kek

>>18362684
He's inordinately proud of himself during the entire video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-e5gTx1fVU4

>>18361588
He is afraid of filthy tourists stealing his eggs

>>18361615
Holy shit dude cool it with the autism and make the fucking food already, this webm is making me as unreasonably angry as the one where it takes the middle eastern dude like 20 minutes to make table-side tartare and he’s throwing shit all over the place. Stop playing with your fucking food and expecting people to be impressed, nobody cares. I hate this man

>>18361657
I fucking hate Koreans so much it’s unreal. Literal insect people. Same goes for the Chinese.

>>18361657
why does whatever's in the glass react so violently? it can't be hot oil since that would probably destroy the glass unless it's a pyrex wine glass

>>18361872
because fuck you that's why you stupid fucking chink. not everything needs to be stir fried bat and teriyaki pangolin you fucking gook

>>18361855
I love watching these guys

>>18362756
It's oil

>>18362725
It's a joke video from the onion you retard

>>18362270
>filling up on carbs
you got jewed for 20 GBP there m8

>>18360296
I love cooking now

>>18362774
What onion?

>>18362706
This video is like poetry..
The more of the poem being never go to Brazil

>>18361702
I'm pretty sure that's the point

>>18360533
2007 ass

>>18362774
The one I mentioned in my post isn’t though, bud.

>>18362766
The amount of projecting going on in this violently sperged out post is borderline impressive.

>>18361657
Buggirl eating bugs

>>18362809
u r autism

>>18362798
Then why is the video making you mad if you know it's a joke

>>18362766
And are these "chinks" in the room with us right now?

>>18360038
i wish i could go back to 2014

>>18362756
It's hot oil. Of course it's some kind of strong glass. How do you think they heat shit up in labs?

>>18362856
She's married, guys. You will NEVER have her give you that goofy, cute smile while she tries her best to cook her husband pancakes.

MESTRE

>>18360347
I had no idea she was french canadian. God I'm gonna coom hands free

>>18361611
The left is just when he clocked in, he's still trying to sell all the eggs before he can leave

>>18362901

>>18362820
The one I mentioned isn’t a joke and there are many such cases. Read better, fren

>>18362944
My reading comp is fine. Is yours?
>this webm is making me as unreasonably angry

>>18362901
Fuck I hate Asian people so much

>>18362948
Wew lad

>>18362951

>>18362953
I know, it's hard for you to be such a dumbass. You'll find a way to cope

>>18362270
>ladbox
This is a fucking 10 year old boy box, a real ladbox would just be a regular old fashioned munchy box but with a cheeky twist.

>>18363010
Vijay! I said to TOAST the meat not TOES it!

>>18362943
This.

>>18362969

>>18363045
LOL@ that kid having a full on legit "Emperor has no clothes" moment

>>18360038
>>18361611
post the other egg guy, the really surly one

>>18362896
What are they?

>>18362747
What the hell is going on here?

>>18363079
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lpgdwx5X_E4

>>18363085
ask >>>/pol/

>>18363045

>>18363091
I had music playing loudly and that bell made me shit my pants.

>>18363085
I think they're sweet potatoes that are going to get caramelled from the amount of sugar being poured on them.

>>18363131
>Win a visit from Davis

>>18363131
why do they always have that face? i feel like its one person doing any webm even remotely similar to this

>>18363154
so why do bugs/small creatures go insane when put in alcohol? the centipede webm just shows them dying, and you wouldnt be able to kill a mammal by submerging it in ethanol

>>18363045
>even the kid looking over like 'what the fuck is this supposed to be?'
lol

>>18363162
I too would like to know this.

>>18363162
They breathe through their skin by a process of gaseous osmosis. Normally glands snap shut on detecting moisture to exclude the intake of liquids, but ethanol dissolves those glands resulting in the insect being internally flooded.

>>18363162
pretty sure the animals in this webm are actually tiny eels of some kind
in either case it's the equivalent to you or me getting put in a room full of chlorine gas, the alcohol is literally burning their gills and they're trying to get free

>>18363162
The centipedes were put in hot oil
The leeches basically breathe in the alcohol. Only a small dosis is needed to kill small animals while large animals need more.

>>18360533
kek'd and check'd

>>18363125
A good way to ensure no one ever comes to your house again

>>18363142
>pours directly onto the counter in a big puddle

>>18363175
who can afford that much butter?
>cooks rice in oil
press x to doubt

>>18363165
This webm makes me want to commit a murder suicide everytime i see it

>>18362353
I miss that packaging

>>18363175
Seems a bit fattening

>>18363198
Dang, it's just a girl performing a character.

>>18363201
I'll kill you too

>>18363165
i'd pay someone to have the joy of killing this disgusting creature

>>18363198
judging by the hair you probably won't even have to be involved when that happens

>>18363165
What is a gerblin and why does he keep saying it?

>>18363211
These are for a joke, right?

>>18361571
>>18363175
This shit is just fake as fuck and made to trick zoomers on instagram

>>18363212
damnit, who am i supposed to murder suicide then?

>>18363223
Queen Elizabeth II

>>18363228
she died, do i wait for the third one to come around?

>>18363162

ethanol is a quite brutal solvent and I assume it enters their breathing systems quickly

>>18363232
>believing the lies
She lives.

>>18363165
>ywn fuck they/them gerblin bussy

ITT 99.9% of the same stupid webms.

>>18362736
Reminds me of your mom's asshole

>>18363217
Trick them to do what?

>>18363285
>posts absolutely nothing
>whines

>>18363284
thank god

>>18363131
you know, could be much worse
its just noodles + mince + some dough
probably tastes alright, and its mainly about the shape anyway

forkin the blender, no spoons allowed

>>18363320
did you miss the part where it's raw inside

>>18363337
I did, yes
raw mince, nice

>>18363162
>ou wouldnt be able to kill a mammal by submerging it in ethanol
fucking retard kill yourself

>>18363359
lmao chill bot

>>18363293
Wasting 30 bucks on butter just to burn the shit out of instant rice in the bottom of their favorite roasting pan

>>18360301
she's canadian

>>18360607
>>18361004
>>18361015
Aside from looking disgusting, how does one consume this slop, is it finger food or do you use utensils?

>>18363359
>shortly after the attacks of Sept. 11, 2001
kek'd

>>18363359
???

>>18363165
This is actually one of the women from the foam adventure video.

>>18361299
Getting secondhand embarrassment from this

>>18361290
Fucking hell mate, that ain't how you fry your pancakes.

>>18361290
And that's how you make vomit

>>18361299
>When you're finally legal drinking age but never drank before

>>18363210
>>>/pol/

>>18363232
peak internet

>>18362741
>BEST PIZZA IN TOWN

>>18361299
Ive always been curious to get a full accounting of all the shit shoved in that jar

>>18363211
oh my fucking god this one sucks
fuck whoever did this

>>18361611
How the fuck has there never been a follow up expose on these guys.

>>18361855
blessed and humble good humor merchant

>>18362263
or if you have one

>>18364059
There was one thread where a guy located the stalls on google maps

>>18360533
based

>>18364059
It's like that one barber in India who gave a memorable head massage in that video from the late 2000s, I think someone actually found him to have one himself and make another vid

>>18361779
roast beef detected

>>18364079
We need to get this to Mark Wiens.

>>18363868
Looks like
>1/3rd of a bottle of domestic beer.
>An entire cup of what could just be more beer since he had two other bottles and it's the same color.
>Blue cup could either be flavored vodka or mouthwash.
>Fire cup is clearly vodka.
>1 egg.
>Charcoal from his cigarette.
>Like 1/8th of a Pepsi can.

>>18362741
>waterphone sound effect
>the sound of the tacoma narrows bridge twisting
"fockin 'ell"
>people in the background screaming in pain
>waterphone sound effect
>royalty free guitar riff plays
"this is shite"

>>18363204
pretty reddit but I laughed a bit

>>18362300
No, they just have bloody shits from eating all that garbage

>>18363085
It's called adding a little spice. Something you white boys need to learn a thing or two about.

>>18362798
If you're referring to this >>18361615
Then no, that's most definitely a joke video

>>18363137
"I'll come to you"

>>18363676
Is this good grilled cheese?

>>18361855
The one I was waiting for

>>18364493
I came to her, too.

>>18362465
Little pain and suffering make the food taste better

>>18360533
I honestly miss such tounge-in-cheek misoginy from late 00s/early 10s internets.
Nowadays it's all trannies 9 times out of 10.

>>18360277
That meat is burnt.

>>18361525
Isn't that the Grinch?

>>18364594
It's not tongue in cheek. It's truth. Bitches exist to serve us. It's their genetic purpose. Look at the world since they started acting like they are equal. They have to be forced back down before they collapse society.

>>18360290
>>18360296
American cuisine at its worst.

>>18362627
There's something about it, there's just the right amount of stuff happening. The original video has millions and millions of views and comments from people saying they keep coming back to it for no apparent reason too.

>>18361604
i often make some food abominations like this and i'm underweight

>>18363428
Thank you for pointing out the joke in the screenshot, Anon, and also letting us know that you found it humorous!

>>18363782
fuck off i'm here to cook

>>18364749
Uma

>>18361639
what happens if i put my fat fucking cock in there?

>>18364668
Who pissed in your cereal?

>>18361571
Why am I not allowed to cut them with a knife?

>>18363181
That is the only thing ITT I'd actually eat

>>18363213
it's a type of goblin
they raise chimkins obviously

>>18361890
Hahahahahaha

>>18361855
I never noticed that retarded old lady who can't work the napkin dispenser. He just gives her like 50 napkins he just happens to have on the ready.

>>18364619
Kill yourself

>>18360277
>no gloves at 0:30

>>18364749
Looks cool as fuck and possibly even tasty. If they were nordics instead of nigs you'd call them cultured.

>>18363045
this looked good until they poured all that cum all over it

spaghetti and meatball sandwich is GOAT

>>18365354

>>18365354
if youve ever worked in a kitchen you know that gloves are worse..
without gloves you wash your hands every few minutes or after touching something
with gloves the cook thinks "i have gloves on i can touch whatever the fuck i want" and doesnt wash because puttng on gloves with wet hands is a pain

>>18365687
Why does he do that?

>>18363125
>oi wot if ye put jungle juice where it belongs before ya' serve it, crazy innit?

>>18363085
Sweetening the goyslop

>>18361657
I wanna cave that fucking cunt's face in like you wouldnt believe

>>18365815
Same except her cunt

>>18362366
I asked for gyros, not gyroscope

>>18365845
Carlos!

>>18364627
I think it's the straing of the guy at the camera for half the video, makes him look like a funny overconfident cook showing off and the fact he's lodged in an egg booth

>>18360277
>taps knife

>>18360607
definition of goyslop

>>18363085
Ensuring her fellow negro will not live past 55

>>18365296
I'd tell you to do the same but you already are by giving yourself stomach cancer.

>>18366134
see >>18365687, is it psyops?
are internet cooking shows even real? is it the jews/chinese again?

>>18361657
literal subhumans. it took japan a whole sea and centuries of isolation not to be associated with these wretches.

>>18361290
This isn't Jack?

>>18361855
i would be annoyed