/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>18263234
Why are you retards so fucking triggered by this menu?
Lmaoing at your autistic asses.

>>18263268

What are you ordering though

>>18263234
>beef
I'll have normal, thanks

>>18263238
catering to their audience i see

>>18263289

No substitutions

>>18263234
balsamic chicken sounds good

>>18263298
But I don't want beef, I want a Beyond Beef patty

>>18263306

Get out of our diner

>>18263234
Texas two step for me. In all honesty though I think I'd just leave if they handed me a menu like that

>>18263308

Would you like to add 10% to your bill that will go towards trans runaways?

>>18263320
>bowling alley that sells sushi

>>18263316

>>18263234
Cream cheese jalapeno burgers always end up becoming my personal default choice when they're available. The parmesan garlic fries on the side sound great.

>>18263320
>lucky strike roll
Do you get a cigarette with your sushi? Could be fun.

Well? We're waiting!

I still don't know how they got away with it

>>18263354

I honestly would have enjoyed eating here

>>18263234
I would like... the poutine burger...
>>18263320
...with a side of Belgian fries...
>>18263346
...some $1.50 Poptarts...
>>18263354
...a Big Sexy Porterhouse...
>>18263366
...and some Back-Breaker Beer-Battered shrimp!

>>18263373

Your card declined

>>18263378
I am paying for everything with Scrooge McDuck swimming pool jewels.

Welcome to gook burger home of the gook burger can I take your order?

>>18263268
It "looks goods", but it reads terribly. The leading is too tight.
And WTF is "Woah" supposed to mean anyway?

>>18263398
A Double Beast and K-Pop burger, pls!

>>18263426

>no Dr.K

Smh

>>18263234

Why?

>>18263797
What the fuck ahhhhh

>>18263894

What country is this

>>18263346
Just imagine for a second being the pitiful wagie stuck on menu duty.
>make cutouts for every single redundant word
>glue them to the wall, letter by letter
>roastie manager comes by and tells you to start over, to make it a little more silly (: haha
>take them all off, letter by letter
>remove the glue
>start putting them up AGAIN, letter by fucking letter
>ponder the perfect balance between sillyness haha (: and legibility
>at least the glue fumes start kicking in
>gonna make yourself a nutnutnuttinutbutterflakecchiato or a doubledrizzlehellaheckinchexmixnuttabalooza
>yeah, that sounds nice
>oh damn, a customer
>finally, your hard work's gonna pay off!
AYO, can I get uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
poptart and some coffee

>>18263894
Piz

>>18263894
I’m not saying those names to a waitress

>>18263993
ey yo bitch i wanna hot piz with uncut penut bites with pussy jews and cum sauze

>>18263894
>classic carbonara with a latin american twist. you werent expecting a boring old pasta, were you?

>>18263442
wtf, its in there

>>18263953
>>18263999 (checked)
KEK
>>18263894
This is a pretty pozzed menu but I bet there's even worse out there. For example, I don't even see anything about white people being responsible for BIPOC suffering, or any references to burgers exclusively for trans folx.

>>18263296

>>18263797
is that Alex from A Clockwork Orange at the top there

>>18264099
Checked, why yes it appears to be!

>>18263953
its probably magnets

>>18264148
This one is an eyesore but there's nothing too retarded on there.

>>18263234
>Cream cheese, jalapeno please, love the menu btw.

>>18264148

No.

one page of like 5 but you get the gist

>scan this to see the menu! It's so much more sanitary!

>>18263398
Big Bang, Girls Generation, After School

>>18264455
Food sounds decent though.

>>18264472

This is annoying AF

>>18264472
i dont have a smart phone wut now

>>18264833
Ask for a paper menu and they'll give you one. For all they know you could be disabled and can't use a phone for whatever reason.

>>18263935
I’d bet Portland or somewhere in California

>>18263238
Wtf is that real?!?!?!

>>18263894
Uncut peanut bites

>>18263234
>>18264148
>>18263238
>>18263346

how to fuck with people who are color blind or have bad eye sight

>>18264553
ive had it before, its very very good.

>>18264455
Crocodile Cristo sounds nice

>>18263234
Yeah it's kinda hard to read I guess but some of those burgers sound pretty good

>>18263894
ITT: We make up gay names for normal food

>peanut butter and jelly
Nutty Butty & the Sweet Stuff

>>18263797
I never trust a menu with this much variation unless its like 5-6 ingredients used a bunch of different ways.

>>18263354
He was in a frisky mood, Chud.

>>18263354
God, I could really go for a Big Black T-Boner

>>18263234
Surf and turf and it had damn well better not be savory like last time

>>18264985
i had the chunks of meat in a circle

just left a brewhouse restaurant with family. digital menus from a QR code, of course. puzzlingly, their drinks weren't on the menu, anywhere. i thought it was odd for a brewhouse. normally they'd be shilling their brews and all the special ones you can only get there, or what meals it would pair with. naturally the first thing we were asked was what we wanted to drink. no surprise, we were all "fine with water."

>>18263234
from a design perspective this works as long as it's a decently small menu. the concept of showing what you're getting on your order in the same order it's assembled is kinda neat functional visual communication, but i don't think it's crucial information for the customer.

seems like it works fine because they're still using it
https://www.stuftburgerbar.com/_files/ugd/cf3aa1_5b888991e0214f2eaa80b84add91fe8b.pdf

>>18263234
i’m starving. i’ll have:
- the slider sampler, with cream cheese jalapeno, tequila sunrise and chile relleno,
- the cranberry chicken starter
- chipotle bbq chicken & brew no. 2 onion strings for the road
much want. thanks, op.

>>18263354
The Summer of 92 Sirloin for me. Can't beat the classics.

>>18263234
>fried egg on veggie burger
kek wtf was their problem

>>18264928
color blindness would probably be an advantage here?

>>18263234
Black & Blue. best damn cheeseburger ever conceived.

>>18263234
Yeah, can I get an uuuhhhhhhhhhh a Western?

>>18264009
>there's a shriveled monkey head in hidden in the spaghetti

>>18263234
YEAH UHHHH I'LL HAVE THE BLACK & BLUE CHIPOTLE KETCHUP APPLEWOOD BACON CARAMELIZED ONIONS BLEU CHEESE CRUMBLES FRESH BEEF SHREDDED LETTUCE *breathe in* PLEASE

>>18263404
It's spelled "whoa"

>>18264141
How does that work?

>>18263234
Everything on here looks hella good wym

>>18263404
Look at the menu. "Whoa" is meme items

>>18264148
>Ill have the blacked chicken and a wop salad

>>18263234
idk, I think this menu is fine

>>18265082
p-predator...

>>18264455
sovl

>>18263797
It would be absolute hell to work here and have to memorize this shit.

>>18263238
Trying to be hip but yeah difficult to read

>>18263346
Trying to be hip but yeah difficult to read.

>>18263366
I ate at the wwf New York Chris Benoit came in half way through our meal it was a slow night and he was alone at the time he was new to wwf and We didn’t say anything to him oh yeah the food was decent I guess like an applebees

>>18263234
BEEF

BEEF

EVEN MORE BEEF

>>18264833
Go eat at the retirement home grandad

>>18263234
Triple Threat
Hand-cut Fries
Chocolate Shake

>>18263894
yes i'll have the slap yo mama

>>18263346
why are soys obsessed with cereal?

>>18263398
One (1) girl friends, please

>>18264148
>soft crab salad shell
wat

>>18266061
Ever get all covered in mud and extra slippery? uwu

>>18266283
Yeah I'll have the Jerusalem artichoke and the.. uhhhhh.. young pinecone. The Mrs. will have the blood and spices

>>18264148
Imagine running in with an eraser or black spray paint

>>18264099
He wants you to drink his milk while his eyes are being kept wide open by calipers, so he can watch it, dude!
Ultraviolence!

>>18263426
For me, It's the SUBGENIUS' CHOICE!!

>>18264472
this led me to a pornsite full with furries... you sick boy

>>18264141
It is magnets, from those refrigerator poetry sets.
>>18265894
>pic

>>18268138
>take shitty British food
>attach celebrity name to it
>sell for three times as much
Fuck I hate people

>>18266061
Holy shit... I can see the original...
But WHERE'S THE GUN??

>>18264148
I like this one. What's wrong with it? It's easily readable and it's stylish. They have clear bold bright colored letters, keep the stark black background for legibility, and every item is in order.

>>18263935
usa do you even have to ask

>>18268303
>readable
Objectively no

>>18264148
LOLs
That shit is the signifier of a SCATTERED KITCHEN

>>18266208
HOLY FUCK!!
>Imagine being THIS programmed
No...Really, HOLY FUCK!!

>>18268135
I'd love to see that---The new ""Knock over the greeting card display" Anon makes good...

>>18269444
>going to SHAMELESSLY self-check my new OC with my gal.
WTF 4chins?!?1

>>18263398
I'll have the ramen.

>>18269513
Number #13 for me---
>checking yer poast

>>18268188
Being real, those are typical restaurant prices these days

>>18263354
kek what a bitch

>>18263398
Ive had a kimchi burger before, it's delicious.

>>18265011
>carbonara fiesta
>normal food

>>18264148
>voynitchmanuscript.jpg
I kek'd out loud.

>>18263354
It has officially been 30 years since Kevin Nash was raped

>>18263894
>Hi, I'd like a plate of piss please

>>18264455
>Bottomless O-Rings
Isn't that what destroyed the space shuttle Challenger?

>>18263234
what is wrong with a menu that tells you the exact location of all the ingredients in the dish? Sounds amazing.

>>18268188
In this case it's overpriced because the restaurant is located in a casino in Las Vegas

>>18264928
Do you think the color blind cannot see the letters at all?

>>18269434
good name for a bad band

>>18269513
namsanmamamubangtansinsadongchingchongdingdongTWICE

>>18264009
Pasta de Macaco

>>18268303
What background?

>>18264083
What happens if I beat Chuck E at pong?

>>18266198

I really wish I could have at at WWF ny shit looked comfy

That and JRs BBQ

>>18263373
Fat

Most of these problems could be avoided by not allowing women to run their own businesses.

>>18266572
soft-shell crab salad?

>>18263234
OP, this is a neat menu.

>>18263238
>>18263346
>>18263797
>>18264148
>>18264455
Horrendous.

>>18263953
>at least the glue fumes start kicking in
kek

>>18263282
Poutine burger with kettle chip nachos

>>18263234 is it cheating to post this

>>18274434
it's genuinely impressive that a couple can eat there for $9.95 but all the retarded influencers will pay him $205.95. good price differentiation.

>>18263234
as goofy as this menu is it's at least legible unlike some of the menus ITT

>>18266283
This is like the shit they eat in American Psycho

>>18266283
fuck it. i'll eat the whole damn duck.

>>18274457
i heard something about how the burgers are actually dry as fuck but it was a reddit post so idk if it is true

>>18274482
>call your burger wet burger
>make it dry as fuck
god salt bae is based. it's nearly as good as "the cheese is melted."

>>18266283
>norway
>english

>>18274488
also a glass of water is 4.50 and a glass of red bull is 7.50
what type of motherfucker goes to a restaurant orders a burger and has an entire glass of redbull

>>18274559
>he doesn’t enjoy a ‘bull with a ‘burger
Bet you don’t dip your pizza in oj, either
Fag

>>18268165
Shut the fuck up and peacefully die, old man.

>>18263346
Can I get gift voucher available?

>>18263993
That's what I in most foreign restaurants, I just point to a thing on the menu and refuse to say what its called, fuckers should have numbers

>>18263346
What's blood milk?

>>18274434
>juicy burger and easy burger are identical
>one costs twice as much
this is a menu that requires you to pay attention

>>18274434
This menu is based beyond belief, every option is bait designed to separate retards from their money

>>18263346
>when your menu is also a ransom note

>>18270321
>>18263354
To this day I don't get the hook of this meme. Like specifically why Kevin Nash in particular over other wrestlers.

>>18263234
The Hangover, because fried egg on a burger is fucking delicious, and I like bagels.

>>18266283
>Buckweat "chocolate"
w-what is it?

>>18263234
Just a word salad for me, thanks

>>18271767
hahahahaha fuck nice one

>>18274448
this looks like when i was in graphic design class in high school and I was testing out le funny fonts on a blank ppt

>>18265774
>in hidden in
ESL

>>18263296

>>18263346
I'll have a gallon of milk thanks

>>18271923
You get put in the pizza

>>18274482

I appreciate a good pretzel

>>18264842
bullshit. I was at this "hip" burger place on vacation and they had zero fucking paper menus. since it took me and my family like half an hour to get the shitty website to work last time we were there, we just called for a waiter who had to use his tablet to go through the menu for us.
fucking retarded. at least the fries were good.

>>18274434
>get easy burger
>free fries
>tap water
>pay 10 bucks plus tax, no tip
better than going to 5 guys ngl

>>18263797
kenny shopsin was a legend take it back

>>18274434
>Hi, yes, I identify as a woman
>I'd like the Veggie Burger, a French Fries and some tap water please
>Thank you

>>18263797
Does a .midi start playing when you open this?

>>18263894
I can't decide if this menu makes me want to kill myself or send me on a murderous rampage or both. I mean I'm joking of course but I don't get how these people are that unaware of themselves how all this meme shit with titles and everything is beyond embarrassing.

>>18263894
"i'll have the 'edgy veggie stew', niggers"

>>18263234
I like this menu. It’s bold, daring, and informative.

>>18274482
Where the fuck are the prices? I better not be paying $30 for a funnel cake

>>18264148
People who live in cities are getting more cancerously mentally ill by the day anymore I swear.

>>18263234
Do I get to send it back if it isn't stacked in the exact order shown on the menu?

>>18263894
>Literal progressive pride flag on bottom
yeah, I would leave the resturant for that alone. Reading the actual menu makes me want to an hero.

>>18266208
Kill yourself immediately.

>>18277241
If a place refuses to give me a menu I can hold in my hand and expects me to scroll through my tiny phone screen I walk out and leave.

>>18277241
You sound like you're either a geezer, disabled, or both lmao, either way, kys

>>18264455
>Sanford's
WY anon? This restaurant is in my town and the menu is a bitch to read

>>18268188
I've worked in a few Gordon Ramsay restaurants. Trust me the food is never shitty.

>>18274482
What’s 7OS burger?

>>18278299
A Gen X burger

>>18278303
So it’s 70’s burger.

>>18264131

I want the m&m slice

>>18263346
they're seriously offering cereal and poptarts at restaurant prices and people are paying it?! Wtf?! Why the hell would I not buy a $5 box of cereal and get 5-6 breakfasts out of it? But hey, you gotta be bad at your personal finances for communism to seem like a good idea I guess.

>>18263238
Tacky as shit

>>18263234
wait... this isn't a bad menu...

>>18278644
it's the rEsTaUrAnT eXpErIeNcE BrO

>>18278644
Kind of makes sense if they get exotic cereals from around the world that you can't easily get
I bet japs have lychee cereal, I would like to try that

>>18274434
>invest in shitty $5 wig
>claim you're trans and therefore a lady
>order 10 veggie burgers for free every day
It's win/win.
Either you get free food or the place gets smashed by an angry PoL mob looking for excuses to destroy things. And if they try to fuck with the food, it''ll just be more fuel on the chimpout fire.

>>18274743
Your first mistake was to expect schizo posting to make sense.
The second was to reward his failed memeforcing attempt with those shiny red exclamation marks he craves.

He once insisted that his retarded acronym was totally used by everyone on /co/, only to get humiliated when an archive search returned a whooping 5 results that were all posted the same day.

>>18274881
>bagels
Anon, those are doughnuts.

>>18271792
if they are blind to colours and all the leters are colours then obviously, they cant see them are you retarded or what?

idiot

>>18279459
they aren't shape blind professor drooling dipshit

>>18263234
Dennis please

>>18264455
https://youtube.com/shorts/qos0D6tjs7I
This place looks cool

>>18264148
Welcome to Café Seraphinianus, may I take your order

>>18263234
Does this still count as a menu?

>>18266283
duck heart
beef fat... is that a side?

blood and spices

>>18263797
based gradient aesthetics

>>18263238
$100 this has one of those "everyone is welcome here" lecture signs next to a "fuck trump" sign

>>18263346
i set the menu on fire

>>18263894
>piz'
>not 'za

>>18278005
And you've obviously never seen how garbage some web/app designs can be. I recently ordered from Costco photos and their online cropping tool is garbage. And that's Costco, if anon tells me some hip burger place cheaped out on code monkeys making their website then I believe it in an instant.

>>18278644
Now you're starting to understand how people who can cook see the majority of restaurant food.

>>18278878
Let's be real here the pastel pink and blue police probably wouldn't back you up unless you put in way more than 10 dollars worth of effort to convince them.
Now if you got an actual pink and blue person to do it then maybe.

>>18263346
these are making me angry

>>18263894
>classic carbonara!
>with a latin twist
these cunts

>>18274434
>saltbae baklava shake
I want one

>>18277406
>>18278878
the place is in Dubai. Try to pull that shit and the angry comes for YOU with rocks wrapped in handkerchiefs

>>18269513
let me get that GG

>>18269513
>ayo lemme get that number 13 TWICE

if given 1 burger:
>AYO WAS DIS I ORDERED THE 13 TWICE HUZAAAH

if given 2 burgers :
>LOOK MUFUGAH I ASKED FO MUH SANWICH AN I WAS GET 2!?!??! YOU MUFUGGERS WANT TO SELL ME ANUDAH OF THAT UU TRYNA ROBBING ME SENPAI

>>18274482
dairy bar kino menu. The kind plastered on the side of their window with wheat paste

>>18263894
>tossed in parmesan
>vegan (yes, really)

>>18280157
This is what trying too hard to the point of being negative levels of funny and just annoyingly gay looks like.

>>18283675
This is what pure unbridled autism looks like when rolled up clumsily and packaged in a single low quality post.

>>18277354
>be lady
>get veggie burger for free
>fries for free
Ez life

>>18281518
Anon...have you seen trannies nowadays?

>>18266205
NOW THAT'S A FUCKING MENU ITEM

>>18266283
I imagine each dish costs like 3000 dollars but some of that actually sounds good, first time ive ever said that about a pretentious place.

>>18263894
can someone please post that mac n cheese recipe some guy made for his nephew

>>18268117
it's a total course, you have to get everything

>>18264148
Wop sAlad?

>>18282159
>order the GG burgah
>get served a pile of shit on a plate
>get raped by the waiter
Delicious

>>18285019

>$58 for a whole chicken

Gtfo

>>18263238
ah yes the ransom note cafe

>>18263797
the schizo van aesthetic

>>18280866
>nooooo you have to accept me and my racist, sexist beliefs!!!!
>you HAVE to welcome everyone even people who want to take your rights away or even kill you!!!
>us rightwingers are the true oppressed minority!!!

fuck off fascist.

>>18285469
people act like this and then act surprised when random mass shootings happen

>>18285475
>if you don't let us threaten and/or harm anyone who's not a straight white man we'll do a hecking mass shooterino!!!
fucking chuds like you will get no mercy when the time comes.

>>18285506
do it faggot

>>18275152
Take my free award good sir

>>18263234
Hangover. Or maybe the poutine. Or maybe the Hawaiian. I'd probably go here more than once. I like the menu too

>>18285506
>Anonymous 08/26/22(Fri)20:09:47 No.18285506>>18285516
>>18285475
>if you don't let us threaten and/or harm anyone who's not a straight white man we'll do a hecking mass shooterino!!!
>fucking chuds like you will get no mercy when the time comes.

>>18285249
Hmm, you can get 2 whole raw young chicken fryer from Costco for like 17 bucks sometimes, so that'd be a pretty crazy profit margin. I think they're trying to justify the 58 bucks by if they're deep frying an entire bird + 'all the fixins'

Which is a fuck ton of labor, but still for 58 bucks I'd expect a frigging Christmas/Thanksgiving meal for a few at least lol.

>>18263882
>>18264099
>>18265033
>>18266113
>>18274404
You retards all deserve to get permabanned from /ck/ for speaking ill of our based lord and savior Shopsin.

>>18263354
kek what a raped bitch

>>18263320
If this is a menu for a strip club, it's actually a good menu. That said, I'd never order fondue or sushi or tacos at a strip club.

>>18285249
What do you expect from Sohla Oy-Veylly

>>18264455
>for FREE
>for FREE
>for FREE

>add Cheese for .50 cents
the fuck

i like those thai restaurants where theres a typo every page, but they have a fucking picture of half of the meals (and the menu list is ordered, so theres like 300 meals).

theres a greasy spoon kitchen i really like where the menu is fucking stupid huge, goes around two corners of the inner wall so you have to physically walk around just to see half the menu. shits pastrimi fries were amazing. the true, extreme and obscene greasy plate of death

>>18263894
i want a chocolate pop tart and a cream,crusheddigestive

>>18263346
>>18289180
>i want a chocolate pop tart and a cream,crusheddigestive
ops

>>18271923
you wouldn't, chuck entertainment cheese is a gamer
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BPcC7cHEhzw

>>18285469
>you have to accept me and my racist, sexist beliefs!!!!
>you HAVE to welcome everyone even people who want to take your rights away or even kill you!!!
>us rightwingers are the true oppressed minority!!!

>>18266283
isnt oslo super remote?

>>18263346
>>18263797

>>18279459
Retardios Custodio everyone

>>18285019
this isn't that bad, it just has a shitty unreadable font and the food is overpriced

>>18266572
It's soft s and crab salad hell

>>18264148
>wop salad
....

>>18271767
kek

>>18280157
This is too far from reality.

>>18280157

>>18264455
i'll have the mashed tatters

>>18266283
>quail egg cooked in roasted bone marrow
>raw milk
>blood and spices
best menu i've ever seen fr fr

>>18266283
Euros are so poor they are literally eating fucking PINECONES?! Lmao

>>18263234
I'll have the BEEF BEEF that's all you need to know

>>18263328
They almost certainly don't make it.

>>18274434
Golden shake??
This is a blue board anon!
Kek

>>18268165
13013

>>18263346
Help I'm having a stroke

>>18263398
I'll take a girlfriend please

>>18263797
I'll have the waitress read me the menu