/ck/ - Food & Cooking

"Boy, that Puffenstuff thing sure looks popular with children. We should copy it."

for you zoomers out there who don't remember, McDonalds used to have this weird creepy clown as their mascot.
Where did he go? But, most importantly, where did he come from??
Who could ever think this was a good idea?

WHEN THE CLOCK STRIKES
HALF PAST SIX BABY
YOU KNOW TO HEAD FOR
GOLDEN LIIIGHTS

This is grimace. He is a weird purple blob thing.
He was introduced as a character who would steal milkshakes.
All these freak characters lived in a place called "McDonald Land".

Who comes up with this shit? It's like a bad acid trip.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gMS5dsdNSqE

>>18229428
I want to cum all over Birdie.

>>18229428
marketing to attract kids

This is birdie.
bidie was a character invented to market their line of breakfast products...

Why?? How is this thing supposed to sell me breakfast? Just looking at it makes me lose my appetite...

>>18229466
I want to fuck both of them.

The Hamburgaler always steals burgers.
Now, stealing from McDonalds may be based, by why would you want this image associated with your restaurant?

>>18229466
Cus eggs

>>18229439
It's Saint Pepsi bitch!

These disfigured monsters are known as the "fry guys".
Their entire purpose in life is to steal french fries.
What is this companies obsession with retail theft? Is McDonalds a criminal enterprise?

What the fuck is the pirate and mcnugger guy

>>18229527
That's Captain Crook.
He was used to market the Fille-O-Fish.
In the commercials, he would steal the sandwiches from Ronald in McDonald Land.
Why are most of these characters are career criminals? It's so bizarre.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IUVycby05Rk

>>18229428
They were thinking that marketing to children was a good idea. They still do, but the children are in their 20s and 30s.

>>18229428
The 70s were a different time and most of it can be explained by LSD.

Was Mayor Mccheese corrupt?

I am craving his mcnuggies

Here is a compilation of old commercials. It features:

1. Ronald McDonald leading a congo-line of chimpanzees.
2. Ronald McDonald riding a camel.
3. Ronald McDonald lecturing children about preventing slip and fall accidents at their personal residence.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LwNbjyK09CI

>>18229591

>>18229456

>>18229564
And the guy holding the nuggets?

>>18229428
synergy

>>18229478
>our products are so delicious people are willing to commit a felony to get them
maybe they should hire the guy who murdered the mcdonald's worker over cold fries to be their new spokesman

>>18229428
merchandise my nigga

>>18229492
and maybe being an early bird

>>18229625
man that hamburger jail was fucking wild. it always made me uncomfortable. the one at my mcdonald's didn't have gaps, the only way out was to climb back down the ladder but it was always a traffic jam so you'd get claustrophobic and flip out

>>18229428
they were setting these guys up with costume ideas

>>18229682
That's The Professor.
He was a mad scientist who created the McNugget Buddies.
Anthropomorphic chicken nuggets....
Because people enjoy eating smiling puppets...

Why did they take ronald from us bros...?

>>18230496
lol

>>18230723

>>18229428
I miss em. It was a fun shorthanded way of saying McDonalds is cheap crap mostly meant for children. Their current coffeehouse aesthetic is such a cringe larp

Grimace used to be evil and had like another set if weird udder hands would steal food from people. i personally prefer the dopey mute Grimace

>>18230723
Supersize me poisoned the well so thoroughly that it made it practically impossible to make anything targeted towards children that wasn’t grey bland meal-replacement shakes

>>18229428
maybe Ronald wasn't meant for kids after all

>>18230723
American children became too obese.

>>18229428
right? McDonald's was quite the wholesome place before all that shit

Children desire to know the lore because of their innate curiosity. McDonald land lore is hidden and suppressed wherever it is found, which feed the children's thirst for an answer when they do see glimpses of it.

>>18230723
Along with the whole fatass kids thing, I think it should be noted that into the mid 2000s, Ronald McDonald was becoming something of a joke character. The character was repeatedly used all over media in unflattering parodies (including but not limited to child molestation and flat out murder) to the point that publicly he seemed more recognizable for the parodies than the original one. It was never really specifically said but I think that might have played a part in why he was slowly phased out despite still being the only still existing mascot.