/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>18224699
you're gonna get laughed for being a soft handed turbofaggot at and won't last a single shift

if they really need you they'll just make you the dish bitch

>>18224708
>soft handed
Anon we are talking about making food, not a skilled trades job like electrician or carpenter.

and they'll pay you a "training" wage until you quit

>>18224699
Entirely depends on the place and staff. Nights can vary from being well-oiled machines or royal clusterfucks via day staff leaving all the cleaning for you, other closers being idiots or just slow and the next thing you know it's 3am. Admittedly, most of the restaurants I've worked at only have 2 people on the close shift so your milage may vary.

As for bullshitting on your resume, as long as you're able to memorize shit easily and can achieve something vaguely resembling efficiency you'll be fine if you avoid talking about your past jobs too much.

Best of luck, OP.

>>18224708
>>18224720
I've actually worked in the trades and have ben addicted to fentanyl before, so I feel like I'm suited to restaurant waging.

>>18224729
No, that's illegal here. Full wages.

>>18224734
That's what I was thinking. I found training materials online and already memorized all the menu items and portion sizes.

OP is fucked. Gonna get the boot with no pay. Serves you right for wasting their time and ingredients.

>>18224752
>No, that's illegal here. Full wages.
lol. what are you gonna faggot cry about not getting paid anonymously on 4chink? lmao

>>18224760
I don't understand what you're trying to say.

>>18224758
Worst case scenario is that I fail miserably and they keep me on long enough to document said failures on paper so they can fire me without fear of a lawsuit and I get 2 to 3 weeks of hours at full pay.

>>18224752
>No, that's illegal here.
This post alone shows how dumb and how fucked you are. You're going to burn in a grease fire of your own making tonight. Nice knowing you.

Good luck moron
You should do a spy cam button or something so you can stream it here and we can guide you through what to do.

>>18224781
K

>>18224784
4chanatouille?

I get off at 3am. I will record some of the shift for entertainment purposes and convert to webms.

>>18224784
This.

>>18224773
You really have no clue what the "worst case scenario" is. You better have good reflexes. Sous is going to throw plates, knives, and hot pans at you all night. One word of advice: don't fuck with the dishwasher; you will die.

>>18224795
When they had me come in to do food safety training on the computer I looked up the WiFi password for the office, because the "guest wifi" wasn't working, so this may be feasible.

>>18224800
>you will get literally assaulted
sounds like an easy lawsuit

>>18224800
It's a ubiquitous corporate chain restaurant, I'm gonna go out on a limb and guess that the only "soux" is Sue the waitress, and that all the kitchen staff are pothead zoomers. But yeah, worst case scenario just means I look retarded, get fired and collect 2+ weeks of salary.

>>18224784
>literally op tonight

>>18224699
Hahaha you are completely fucked retard.

>>18224817
Yeah no really, try that and report back. Rooting for ya chief.

>>18224699
Obviously fake but you would be completely fucked in this situation. They will find out within literally minutes that you have no clue what you're doing and just fire you.

>>18224699
>be you
>google various info sites about line cooking
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHi7wetjbmg (googled how to be a good line cook)
>write down termanology
>make up stories about how we did it back at my other jobs
>make up stories about how some ethnic group treated me like shit or would make funny names about me and vice versa
>write down 5 questions
>go to job
>start asking questions "wheres the cleaning station"
>introduce self
>start telling stories
>be humble

its a physical labor job, just bust your ass and kiss the bosses ass. If you can bs for 2 shifts youll be fine.

>>18224841
Have you people never worked before? HR is terrified of firing people without documented cause and documented attempts to train/resolve whatever issues. Even in right to work states.

>>18224699
Holy shit, OP! At least practice at home if you're in for a prep cook nightshift, but if you're working assembling sammiches it's not that hard to learn basics on the go. If it's plating, your lack of experience will show immediately. If it's a fastfood joint, it might go 50/50. If the place wants a cook soloing the shift, i assume it's not a big chain like Subway or whatever you have there.

>>18224817
You really don't get it. You're going to sue some illegals with no money and no address. Good luck finding them and if you do, good luck getting any money out of them. Good luck not getting murdered if you do track them down. But you'll sue the restaurant too, right? Too bad they also have no money. But take them to court anyway and fail because you can't prove they told the staff to assault you. Now you're stuck with the legal fees from the suit too. Just do everyone a favor and don't show up, you're clearly too dumb to cut it. Maybe get a job at Kroger, pushing carts. That sounds more your speed.

>>18224853
>he thinks shitty restaurants have an HR department
Kek

>>18224861
You'd sue the company not the employee. You're dumb, dude. Post better takes.


>>18224846
I will watch that. Thanks.

>>18224865
It's a very popular corporate chain restaurant, of course they have an HR dept.

>$2 extra an hour

how do you people buy food and pay rent?

>>18224867
>Show up court
>Judge they fired me waaaah
Why did they fire you?
>I lied about my experience and actually don't know anything about cooking food in a restaurant
Bam give this down syndrome man his money for the emotional trauma and make the restaurant pay for a new helmet

Never worked in a restaurant before but /ck/ has got to be the dumbest board on 4chan. Throwing some peat in a hot frying pan or putting some pasta in boiling water isn't difficult retards. If OP really did some research about the menu I wouldn't be surprised if he is more competent than most of the guys cooking there

>>18224879
>>18224879
>Bam give this down syndrome man his money for the emotional trauma and make the restaurant pay for a new helmet

Yes, exactly. I see you're familiar with modern court rulings.

We live in an absurd litigious society.

>>18224867
And you need to prove the company hurt you. If a McDonald's employee runs me over on his way to work, I can't sue McDonald's. You have no idea how restaurants nor the legal world work. Take it from me, former chef, now a financial expert for litigation. This also assumes they don't just tell you to leave an hour in.

>>18224887
That's how I feel. If I can cook dinner, I can cook on a line. It's not rocket surgery.

any real restaurant will have you stage for like $40 cash to see what you can do

>>18224699
You're gonna do great, kid.

>>18224896
I've played operation so I'm just as good as a surgeon.

>>18224889
Even absurd bullshit lawsuits typically get settled out of court for thousands of dollars, and your "employee ran me over off the company premises while not clocked in" example isn't exactly applicable to what was originally said.

>>18224909
You're going to get a hot pair of tongs shoved up your asshole and I will laugh when I read about it.

>>18224908
is cooking eggs as complicated as surgery? I feel like I can cook eggs pretty well.

>>18224937
go ahead and try cooking four different kinds of eggs at the same time and post your results

>>18224699
Just start yelling at everyone below you, and assert the dominance of a managerial position. Make the other wagies do your job for you then take credit for it.

>>18224951
Sorry, I'm just not scared of cooking eggs. It is the least intimidating thing I've ever heard of.

>>18224965
Don't worry, there will be plenty of egg on your face tonight.

>>18224979
Preferable to the semen on yours. I refuse to believe it's a terribly difficult job. I will probably be running the place in a month.

>>18224887
>just throw some pasta in the water lol
>Never worked in a restaurant before
Yeah, no shit.

OP will be fired when the first batch of tickets start coming out.

>>18224996
Post an update tomorrow if your fingers still work, lmao.

>>18225022
I will post live from the line tonight and prove that it's a literal job for retards, which means I am well suited for it.

>>18224996
What type of restaurant is it? Does it get busy? Bar food, fine dining? You said line cook, is there a specific station that you were hired for or that you'll be at?

If you're working at Subway you'll be fine. If you're working at a steakhouse you're fucked.

>>18224888
>sues restaurant
>countersuit for fraud and wasting expensive product
good luck OP

>>18225040
It's a Denny's. Apparently I will be the sole night cook and run the kitchen solo. They said they get a bar rush at last call, but otherwise it's not too busy. I'm pretty sure I'll be working with someone at first, though, but I don't know.

>>18224699
Get an online Servsafe food handler certificate before you go
takes about 2-4 hours
if you have one you will seem more legit, people will hire you just because you have one

>>18225046
>solo nightshift
>Denny's
>first time working line

>>18224699
just tell them 'this kitchen is ridiculous, unorganized, and it's not even worth the TWO MORE DOLLARS PER HOUR' at the top of your lungs when you walk out
You seem like you're in the right, and piss everyone off to boot

>>18225051
literally not a single head chef gives a shit. they don't give a shit about 4 years of culinary school either.

>>18225043
>>18225051
I lied and said I had one, but it "was about to expire". I pulled a PDF of the certificate off google and edited my name to it, but they never asked to see it. I did study some basic food safety stuff first. Learned all about the "danger zone" and all that crap.

>>18225055
Kek

>>18224937
you'll have to do much more than just cooking eggs, like multiple dishes at the same time, and with barely enough time to breathe

>>18225060
why would you work in a restaurant? it sounds like you have some 1337 h4x0r sk1LLz

>>18225046
You have no clue how fucked you are. I wish I could watch. No chance you're in Colorado Springs?

>>18225066
OP is going to have a bunch of pissed off waitresses bombarding him all night
>where's are my pancakes?
>this was supposed to be cooked medium not well
>IT SAYS NO ONIONS IN THE HASHBROWNS, IT SAYS IT ON THE TICKET
>this was supposed to have grits and you gave me apple sauce?
>this is undercooked
>I'M MISSING MY TOAST FOR TABLE SIX

>>18225073
I just got clean from a few years of fentanyl addiction and just needed an easy job that I don't care about. I like cooking and banging 20 year old waitresses for xanax bars, so I figured restaurant work would suit me.

>>18225084
Sounds like you should have never cleaned up.

>>18225084
>easy job
You should have just got a job driving forklifts at night. You are going to be so overwhelmed I wouldn't be surprised if you just walked out in the first few hours, if you aren't fired. When my wife was younger she was a waitress at Denny's and thinks you're joking about this. She said if you're not lying you're fucked.

>>18225100
I don't know, I'm a pretty competent person. Maybe it's hubris, but if black zoomers with cheeto hair can do it, I'm pretty sure I'll be fine.

>>18225108
>maybe it's hubris
>maybe

>>18225108
you better follow up you lying faggot

>>18225108
>I'm a pretty competent
>black zoomers
>black
heh ngmi in whatever your life actually isgktkg

>>18225056
Who is that chick?

>>18225117
Don't worry, I will

>>18225108
You're not just frying some fucking egg sandwiches up for a couple of buddies and going home. Those zoomers start off as busboys and dishwashers and learn how shit works and usually end up moving up because someone called off.
>hey anon, Jerry called off, would you mind dropping some tenders and watching the fryer tonight?
>hey that wasn't bad, you wanna shadow someone for a couple of nights?

You're going to be so lost. I wish I was there.

>>18225123
You don't know how to reverse image search? Are you 68 or some shit? You daft and deranged mongoloid.
Use Yandex or some shit, fuck sake. Give a man a fish, and all that shit.

>>18225128
>calls others zoomers
>uses a zoomer website to find a job
kek

>>18225130
I'm smarter than them, though. I just lied and skipped all that shit. I don't see how washing dishes or byssing tables prepares you to be a cook.

>>18225128
We're all pulling for ya buddy, it's Denny's how hard could it be to whip up some slop

>>18225149
That's what I'm thinking. Thanks dudeman.

>>18225141
It's not about being smart anon.

>I don't see how washing dishes or bussing tables prepares you to be a cook
Because you see how everything works. You learn the timing of things. You learn the lingo. You get to know the menus. You absorb information by being in the middle of the situation. You're not going to know how anything works.

>>18225141
>I'm smarter than them
Pfbpf

>>18225154
It's a restaurant. You stock your line and cook food to order. This doesn't take an engineering degree to figure out. They wouldn't pay poverty wages if it required actual skill and talent. Pretty sure it's the most popular occupation for meth heads and parolees.

>>18225046
>>18225108

>>18225132
I'm in my forties fuck face, help a senior citizen out

>>18225108
If you were a competent person you wouldn't have had to lie on your resume to hide the fact you're a jobless neet.

>>18225178

>>18225178
I literally unironically non-metaphorically sincerely genuinely already did. Use Yandex, you aged old fruit. And how in the fuck does someone as old as you not know who that is. Holy fuck.

>Dennys cook shot by teenager on first day for serving bad food

>>18225183
ALL YOU HAD TO SAY WAS JODIE FOSTER

but damn she really dyked up

>>18225178
In your 40s and your first restaurant gig. And it's the Denny's night shift. And you're alone. Oh my god, the waitresses will stab you for fucking their tips.

>>18225181
My work history is fine, it's just all trade jobs with no relevance to the restaurant industry and I don't want to jump back into physical labor in the middle of summer after atrophying from a couple years of drug use and debauched living.

>>18225194
That's not me, just some random coomer lusting over teenage jodie foster

>>18225197
I mean, doesn't any sane man lust over teenage Jodie? You saying you wouldn't take her to pound town? You just gunna be a liar?

>american life and law takes
fucking hilarious to read from the civilized world

>>18225197
You don't want a physically demanding job in the summer.
>Gets a kitchen job
This just gets better and better

>>18225195
>my work history is fine
>i lied to get a job in a diner
>i'm definitely not lying on an anonymous imageboard

>>18225210
Iris? No, I don't know no Iris..

>>18225195
>I don't want to jump back into physical labor in the middle of summer
So your idea was to jump into a kitchen in the middle of summer? Man you are retarded. Trade jobs are what people in the kitchen leave the kitchen to go do.

>>18225210
no i lust over shooting and murdering pederast scumbags like you

>>18225123
The dude from The Accused.

>>18225218
It's spelled Eris, actually.
>>18225223
Woah, I meant when she was 18 bro. The fuck are you on about? Or I mean, 16 if it's legal in state. You don't have an issue with state law do you? Not some kind of communist are ya?

>>18225214
I'm actually a competent pipefitter and commercial plumber. I'm just not up for roasting in the hot sun for 10 hours a day.

Also I can't pass a drug test right now because I've been smoking pot lately and restaurants don't piss test. If this doesn't pan out I'll just suck it up and go back to making $26 an hour in the heat sooner than expected.

>>18225236
go ahead cry about state law when the noose is around your neck you disgusting piece of shit

>>18224699
>"how fucked am I"
>everyone tells OP he's fucked
>"nah, pretty sure I got this just fry up some eggs lol"

>>18225242
My state doesn't have capital punishment, so that won't happen. I do cry when I watch melodramas though. They always hit me hard for some reason. There a reason banging 18 year olds upsets you? Wanna talk about it?

>>18225249
I am nothing if not confident.

>>18225241
>Hasn't even started and is already complaining about the heat.
If you can't handle the heat, stay out of the kitchen.

>>18225252
all pederasts will hang you disgusting piece of shit. try to crying about state law when you're bleeding out of your neck hole

>>18225223
>pederast
A pederast is a boy fucker. Last I checked Jodie Foster was just a dyke not a dude.

>>18225241
How busy does your Denny's get. This is totally fake, no retarded restaurant would hire someone and immediately put them on a solo night shift with no training.

>>18224699
Your lack of experience will show within minutes of your first shift. You will be fired, they might even call the cops as you've legally committed fraud.

>>18225265
all pederasts will hang no matter how much semantics you wanna play you disgusting piece of shit.

>>18225262
What is your opinion on public hangings?

>>18225259
An air conditioned restaurant can't be hotter than the top of a high rise, in direct sunlight, while using an acetylene torch. You restaurant wagies don't know how easy you got it.

>>18225280
pederasts will hang from the nearest post.

>>18224720
>doesn't know what kitchen hands are
Yep--FUCKED.
enjoy fumbling around for the most BASIC of kitchen tasks--You'll be found out in less than a week.

>>18225270
They said nights aren't busy except for the bar rush. I will probably be working with someone thr first few days I would imagine . I don't know, though.

>>18225283
Laborerfag once again proving why he does what he does. UV vs Non-UV light is different. It's still hot in a kitchen, you fucking troglodyte. Of course your work is back braking and no joke, it doesn't mean other jobs aren't hard.
>>18225285
Are you an actual robot or something?

>>18225283
As someone who's worked both, you're 100% wrong. It really depends on the humidity, but working outside is 100% better than working in a hot sweaty kitchen. AC barely affects the inner kitchen with a fuckton of ovens and gas burners going. But you're working at denny's you probably just have to microwave.

>>18225298
i have nothing to say to pederasts except that you will meet a violent end.

>>18224800
>checked for truth diggits
He has NO IDEA.
>>18224817
Good luck with that, Moran.

>>18225283
>He thinks the kitchen is air conditioned
NGMI

>>18225298
If you've never done actual back breaking work, I'd imagine you would think restaurant work is hard. Everything is relative.

>>18225301
But i'm not one of those so we can still talk right?

>>18225275

>>18225307
no i'd kick your fucking teeth in for talking about pederasts sympathetically

>>18225300
The funny thing is, it's the refrigeration that generates the most heat. No vent fans on top either.

>>18225056
Yeah...
FUCKED--

>>18225314
Nah, you'd cook my eggs over easy and give me extra crispy bacon.

>>18225241
Do not listen to the faggots saying it's impossible. I lied and said I had 10+ years experience as a souschef and made a friend in Germany be my reference. I even set up a facebook page for the german fake restaurant and he must have been believable because I went from having worked less than 2 months in kitchen (no culinary school) to having a job as head chef at a hotel. So far so good, it's been a bit over a year now and I am no longer faking it, I am a real head chef. Do it op, I beloeve in you.

>>18225321
no i would knock your fucking teeth out and put you in a coma you fucking piece of shit

>>18225315
I was shown the line during the computer training shift. It's air conditioned, and they have a couple squirrel cage blowers on the ground. Ambient temp eas about 80. Paradise compared to what I'm used to.

>>18225315
I worked in a place that had all the fridges/freezers in a separate room(it was a shitty place) and it still turned into hell in the kitchen. FUCK southern humidity.

>>18225325
You could literally walk past me on the street and not know who I am, anon. Get a grip.

>>18225325
Yikes dude who cummed in your cheerios

>>18225321
Again, OP is not one of the faggot coom brains desperately trying to convince everyone they're not pedos.

>>18225335
all pederasts will hang you disgusting piece of shit. you will be found.

>>18225342
>>18225344

>>18225344
I will find your son and fuck him. If you don't have a son yet, then I will wait until he is born. There is no stopping me. You will cry in pain at the thought.

>>18225350
all pederasts will hang. come find my son and see what happens.

>>18225350
>>18225352
Meds now

>>18224699
this is the first thing on 4chin that has made me laugh for MONTHS!

KWAB!!

>>18225352
I've already found him. It's too late, your son's ass is mine. See you soon.

>>18225361
all pederasts will hang you disgusting piece of shit.

>>18225329
You don't get it, that's the coldest the kitchen will get.
>>18225332
Even in the northeast it gets hot. Ever see butter break, just sitting on the counter?

>>18225352
We did already, he just doesn't dare tell you because he thinks its his fault we raped him. Every night he thinks about it. He'll transition soon, remember to be supportive of his way of dealing with getting raped.

>>18225365
Lock your windows tonight. I'm coming.

>>18225377
Kek stop baiting the schizos

If it's a not particularly busy place and they have you shadow someone for a while I bet you'll actually wing it fine. If they're genuinely expecting you to hit the ground running and knock out 25 covers an hour it'll be a shitshow. Do you have good shoes?

>>18225387
I have $20 Walmart nonslips that i put nice $50 redwing insole inserts from my work boots into

>>18225395
One piece of actual advice I'll give you, get a pair of Crocs, bistro black. You want an easy slide off, just in case. You're still NGMI though.

>>18224720
Line cooks regularly burn their hands with hot stoves, boiling oil and 300 degree metals.

Do you even know what to do when boiling oil splashes on your skin?

>>18225325
If you wanted us to post loli stuff then you should have just said so baka tsundere anon

>>18225409
I literally work with molten metal. I solder pipes overhead with a torch. My work shirts literally have molten metal embedded into the fabric from drips. I'm pretty sure I'll be okay lol. You guys desperately want to believe cooking food is a special skill that few can manage. I can't force myself to believe it. I guess I'll find out tonight.

>>18225405
>You want an easy slide off, just in case.
Why's that? Not OP, just a curious rubbernecker.

>>18225409
I'm not OP and not a professional cook, but I certainly would like to know.
Google says put it under lukewarm water. Is that right??

>>18224800
>don't fuck with the dishwasher; you will die.
usually a guy just out on parole

>>18225431
In case boiling water or hot oil pours into your shoes
>>18225433
You suck it up and get back to work. If it's really that bad, take a cigarette break.

>>18225433
Dude thinks running to the sink after getting burned is secret knowledge and not instinctive behavior. I haven't even started and I'm already sick of restaurant workers bullshit.

>>18225425
>you guys desperately want to believe cooking food is a special skill that few can manage
No one is saying that you fucking idiot. They're saying you can't just walk into a restaurant with no experience and pretend to know what you're doing.

>>18225448
kek watch me

>>18225425
You will 100% look like a fucking retard in the kitchen. But Denny's is probably so desperate that they'll let you stay anyways.

>>18225411
>>18225384
>>18225377
>>18225368
you might think i'm joking but im dead serious. i will kick your fucking teeth in and choke you until you are dead. all pederasts will hang.

>>18225457
Nah dude, i watch a lot of pierre white and chef John videos on YouTube , pretty sure i got this

OP's customers tonight

>>18225462

>>18225465
You have no idea what you're doing, or else you wouldn't have chosen fuckin Denny's lmao.

>>18225484
Whym is Denny's hard or something? It's hamburgers, steaks and eggs, bro.

>>18225484
It's a shame he won't be at Waffle House.

>>18225484
What's particularly wrong with choosing Denny's for such stunt?

t. Euro, unfamiliar with restaurant chains of burgerland.

i'm watching diners dives and driveins and i could totally be a network television host

>>18225489
No retard, because it's barely above fast food. If you knew what you were doing you'd choose a place that isn't going to pay you fucking Denny's wage.
>>18225495
It's barely a restaurant.

>>18225520
They started me at 17. I chose Denny's exactly because it was basically fast food. I don't want to lie to and fuck over some mom and pop joint. Denny's can eat my balls, though.

>>18225495
It's the volume and the rush that will fuck OP. >>18225520 is right, barely a restaurant. But OP hasn't cooked multiple different meals at the same time before, nor does he know how to time them to all be done at the same time. What will really fuck him is the constant pressure from the waitresses whose tips will shrink more and more as OP flounders and the tickets stream in. Biggest tip for OP, make it edible and push it out. But I'm sure he'll pop a few bars on his way in and forget about the entire thread; it'll make him more like a real line cook though.

Okay I'm taking a nap. I start my shift in just under two hours. See ya on the line faggots.

>>18225455
Is there a way that I can do this? I'd really love to watch you work Denny's night shift with no experience and getting screamed at by bitchy waitresses.

>>18225537
the only line full of shift you're doing is taking a trip down the the monkeypox highway

>>18225526
It's not just Denny's. You're fucking over the servers and on a busy night too. I feel so bad for them.

>>18225535
I got footballs, not bars. And the training showed me all the cook times. Hashbrowns were 4 minutes before flipping, and can hold for 5 minutes on the grill, pancakes were two minutes per side, sunnyside eggs were a minute and 15 seconds, etc, etc. Also it said the tickets list items in their "drop order" from longest cook time to lowest. It's set up for retards. I am going to knock this shit out of the park and the waitresses will be amazed at how good my plates look.

>>18224699
If you have your shit even slightly together you're probably fine.
Expectations are very low.

>>18225555
That's what i think, too. This whole thread is wagies coping by pretending their job is hard.

>>18225550
i once had three waitresses and the owner's wife suck my dick all while running the line you'll be fine anon hope you took your supplements

>>18225550
Oh, they have the cook times and drop order for you? Why didn't you fucking start with that? You actually might be fine.

>>18225557
You're working at Denny's anon. You'd know any real restaurant would reject you on the spot after seeing your floundering in the kitchen.

Most entertaining thread in a long time. When’s your shift start

>>18225559
Well, I'm not retarded I can just look at food and tell when it's done, so i didn't even think to mention it. Didn't even seem helpful that they listed them in the training videos, desu.

Okay nap time.

>>18225535
Wow multiple meals at the same time and cleaning? That sounds super hard, you're definately not just a glorified house wife that doesn't get fucked after the customer eats the meal

>>18225543
>monkey pox highway

Are you planning to come back there and sneeze on my spatula or something?

>>18225570
Who says you don't get fucked? That happens when you look at your paycheck.

>>18225108
Competent people don't develop fentanyl addictions

>>18225241
buy fake pee for pee tests

>>18225683
I've never passed a drug test without studying in my life. I just wanted something easy I could coast through until winter, so I chose restaurant waging.

Whilst we at it, can /ck/anons who actually work in US HoReCa tell if it's really such a big workforce crisis as they say in restaraunt news webzines? Not a week goes by without an article, big or small, on how covid stuff got laid off BoH and FoH staff to get out of industry jobs and no new people want to work for that wage

>>18225550
definitely take at least 3 footballs

This makes me feel good about have an advance degree (JD)

>>18225462
>pederast
Anon, I don't think you know what that means.
If you like female teens, you aren't that.

>>18224699
>Fake resume
Tbh restaurant owners are asking for it at this point, fuck them and Chad move op

>>18225473
>OP's customers tonight

>>18225222
This is true. My husband was a chef and when we had our first daughter he became an electrician because it’s much less stress than being a chef

It begins

>>18224699
>How fucked am I
extremely. what kind of psychopath makes up a fake resume?

>>18225866
More people than you'd think

>>18225850
You got this anon. Make these retards who think cooking is difficult seethe.

>>18225872
Yeah, the dishwasher already offered to smoke a blunt on our break. It's going to be a good night. Smooth sailing.

>>18225877
you pop them footballs?

>it's another survivor bias episode
all jobs are equally fucking shit. there is no such thing as a comfy job. someone who is good at something will be able to tell a well trained but inexperienced person. you're all retarded.

>>18225899
>t. has had one job
You're beyond retarded if you think all jobs are equally good or comfortable.

Gay larp>>18225923

>>18225923
i've had way too many jobs which is how i have landed on this perfectly valid and logical conclusion. any situation where you have to exchange your time away is gay and aids and completely intolerable.

>>18225872
so you've never worked at a restaurant, huh?

>>18225883
You already know

>>18225935
>It's a larp to say not all jobs are the same
You are... incredibly low IQ.

This seems like an autistic LARP thread desu

>>18225967
Probably is but I'm super invested after reading all this and hope OP posts an update about how terrible/great it's going

did OP walk out yet?

>>18225967
Well yeah, OP's literally LARPing as an experienced line cook as we shitpost.

They made me finish the computer crap, now I'm going on the line after i smoke a cigarette. Working with an experienced cook tonight.

The manager had a call in for tomorrow and asked me if it's cool if it's just me and him tomorrow and the next night. I said sure thing boss Trial by fire nigga. Enjoying my second smoke break then im off to the line.

>>18225046
>Pretty sure I'll be working with someone at first though.

Dude you told them you have years of experience. They're good expect you to just be able to jump right in, it's not like there's anything proprietary in a Dennys kitchen that you would need special training for. At first yeah I thought the thread was overreacting but no experience, expected to solo a Dennys bar rush on your first night? Yeah dude you're fucked.

>>18226164
>Working with an experienced cook
KEK he's going to see right through you. But they sound desperate as fuck, so they probably will let it slide.

>>18226175
Based for actually delivering updates. Good luck you mad cunt.

Cook immediately went on break as i got on the line. Hope some orders come in so i can freestyle those bitches

>>18226221
Based. Let us know how your first orders went.

This is the best thread on /ck/ right now. I hope you make it bro fuck the haters.

>>18226175
Berger make up some stories about the old kitchens you used to work in if your going to be spending an entire shift alone with him. He’s also going to be able to tell your green by the way you have no idea where anything is or how to perform simple tasks.

>>18225955
Good shit my man have a blast keep us posted

>>18226221

Best get ready nigga, because me and my crew are headed your way for some Moons Over My Hammy

>>18225899
>there is no such thing as a comfy job

I get to work from home, and my employers think my job is way harder than it is so I only actually work an hour or so every day then shitpost or work on hobbies the rest of the time. Still get A+ reviews every year. It's only 19$ an hour but my rent is pretty cheap and I have no debt. So it's pretty comfy.

>>18225433
depends on how severe, if its just a small splash like the kind that would give you a blister put a tomato or pickle or whatever high water content veg you have on it
if it's bad just cover up the bone so the air doesn't sting that bad and have a cigarette before making your next order

>>18224853
>he thinks restaurants have HR departments
>he thinks brand new hires are given full protection
>he's completely unaware of the probationary period
>obviously never had a job and projects onto others that they've never had one
Top kek

>>18226221
Make me an eggs benedict bitch

I can't wait to see this fall apart spectacularly.

>>18226342
>bored anon works at Denny's for years
>makes thread saying he's going to work and doesn't know what he's doing
>other bored anon's basically chill with him while he's at work
>"lol I knocked that shit out of the park, 2EZ"

>>18226221
t h e r e d f l o o r s

>>18226345
Probably true.

Post dishes you made tonight with timestamp or you'rea faggot OP

>>18224699
>I've never worked in a biolab before, but made a completely fake resume with years of experience and got a job as the head of R&D
>how fucked am I?

>>18226419
Not even slightly comparable.

>>18226446
you're a fucking idiot man. might as well have lied about being forklift certified applying for a warehouse job.

>>18225366
>Ever see butter break, just sitting on the counter?
Damn near every day for four years, you just triggered flashbacks and now I can't stop hearing the tickets printing.

moar

>>18226221
I hope you got fucking swamped. Otherwise lame

Where is this anon. This thread had potential but now its kind of shitting the bed.

>>18226495
It's been over an hour since Anon's last post. He's obviously has had his shit hit the fucking fan.

just wait. OP will surely deliver ;o;

Someone make a collage of this and subsequent threads so we can laugh at this autistic retard

>>18226456
You can get away with that since a lot of places will train you anyway when you first start. And you can kind of bullshit saying you're not familiar with the layout yet that's why you're driving slow.

>>18226495
Kek it's Friday night anon, give him some slack. He's either in the weeds or smoking weed.

>>18225314
you seem like a pedo

I think we need to give OP the respect and kudos he deserves for having maxed out speechcraft. How the fuck do you get hired into the most important role in a restaurant with no clue whatsoever of how it works lmao. My man cna clearly talk the best of shit.

Absolute legend. I hope the waitress stabs you behind the dumpster at shift's end for fucking their tips.

>>18226584
>big respect bro
>i hope you get stabbed
Jej

First rush just ended. Ain't shit. Cook said I was a "beast". I burnt my thumb. The dishwasher never smoked weed with me. Busy as fuck. Not really any time to tak shit on 4chan. Management already asking me to take on more hours. EZ money.

I did manage to drop the wrong kind of pancake batter so far and had soneone waiting for an extra 5 minutes.

>>18226595
/ck/ on suicide watch

>>18226595
Respect.

>>18226595
Gratz, lol.

>>18226595
>lies on his resume
>"I totally aced it guys 100% truth"
sure thing buddy

>>18226595
What kind of "rush" are we talking here.

>>18226595
How many orders?

>>18226612
anon I work in finance and accounting and I've lied on every resume and excelled at every job I've every had

>>18224965

Brown edges, unless my tired eyes are not doing well right now. Most likely heat was too high. You don't want that brown crispiness going on in eggs.

>>18226595
/ck/ btfo hahahaha

>>18226595
Thank the xanax

>>18226628
>anon trust me I'm a liar so you can believe me when I tell you I'm saying the truth

>>18224792
>4chanatouille

Kek good one good luck anon

>>18226641
my salary doesn't lie to me :) only downside is that I can't get remote work yet because I change job titles so often I never make it out of the probationary period

>>18226649
yeah sure man. I'm the CEO of Levi Jeans

>>18224800
Are industrial dishwashers dangerous? Is it the steam?

>>18225283
based. fuck /ck/ wagies. you're gonna do great anon and everyone itt is gonna seethe at how easy it is to do their job.

>>18226679
They mean the individual responsible for washing dishes. Dishwashing is unironically a dogshit job, the lowest rung on the back of house ladder. An ex-con with face tattoos and cuts and burns on his hands from washing dishes for 8 hours day in day out.

>everyone thinking a job most people do on heroin is hard
glad you were successful OP, I work nights as a hospital pharmacist, it's 90% easy as shit. I would think pipefitting would get you more money but you do what you want, don't let anyone tell you otherwise

>>18224773
If you suck bad enough, they'll just give you so few hours that you quit. I've seen it a hundred times from employers that didn't have a legal reason to fire someone at an hourly position.

>>18226634
Get some glasses my dude


Here's some random doordash order i made that never got picked up. It's busy as fuck with drunks right now. Will post more when it slows.

Working as a cook at Wafflehouse and at Harveys are two completely different experiences anons.

Makin a skillet bitches, cook went home im 3 hours solo. Referring to recipe book js a bitch

Heated skillet on flat top instead of egg burner. Waitress bitched it wasnt "sizzling". Noted, bitch.

>>18226795
Add one part neutral oil (like avocado), to two parts soy sauce. Put in a squirt bottle. Squirt it over the dish in the cast iron before sending it out. That shit will sizzle nicely.

>>18226612
They are literally hiring anyone. "Very bad but nice and normal" probably won't get you fired even at a good place with high standards. We're in warm body szn

I quit being an RN after 12 years to become a cook last year and have found it very easy and less stressful.
It's all about attitude and how used to you are to dealing with being busy. Obviously, the fact that I was used to cooking at home helped quite a bit as well.
When I started, they didn't even expect me to know how to peel and chop a damn onion, because apparently a lot of culinary students don't.
Almost all of the stress and strain of being a cook/chef is manufactured in the head. These people just need to take a deep breath and calm down a little.
It's not like waiting another minute is gonna kill the client in this biz. Unlike the ICU.

Based thread

>>18226683
>And he WILL CUT YOU if you fuck with his positioning stacks...
This is probably a Larp, but honestly--Drunk Bar rush is ALWAYS fucked up--expectations are LOW.

Made lots of burgers tonight. I am alone but it's slow right now and I just ask the manager questions when I'm lost on something. He tried to rush to the grill when I had a table of 7 come in and started dropping shitI already had cooking, so he just fucked back off because i had it covered.

Y'all had me a little worried, but this ain't shit. I'm gonna coast here until late fall and go back to plumbing.

>>18226858
>>18226858
That wasn't me. Our dishwasher is a young black kid with headphones in.

Manager told me the shifts I'm covering tomorrow were called off due to "declining mental health". I think it was the kid I saw with a nose ring and lilo and stitch backpack during computer training.

We both had a good laugh about how soft zoomers are.

>>18224699
Oh boy I'm sure that restaurant is ready for the driest Steaks and undercooked chicken

>>18226890
I actually had a steak sent back for being too rare. But they asked for medium, then sent it back asking for well.

The chicken breast is cooked in batches and is shoe leather by the time it's served. I tried putting a water dish in with them but they're all fucked.

>>18224735
>fentanyl
Yeah you’re all set to be a line cook

>>18226345
100% this

>>18224699
I dunno, you'll catch up with it.

>>18226984

>>18226973
Cope

>>18226984
Interesting summons, anon.

>>18226993

>>18225046
Dude you’re absolutely boned. Please post what happened in a new thread on here in the following days, I need to know

>>18226984
>>18226989
>>18226993
>>18226997

Witness us, jannies.

>>18226984
>>18226989
>>18226993
>>18226997
>>18227001
See you in 3 days.

>>18227002
We all sink with this ship.

>>18224699
>>18227002
Exactly how I imagine OP's night is going lol.

>>18227007
THEY'RE GREEEEEAAAAT!!!

>>18227007
YIFF YIFF

>>18226863
Nice job OP

>>18227017
YIFF!!!

>>18227017
YIFF'N HELL

>>18227000
He already posted his experience you fucking retard

>>18227001

>>18227011

>>18227011
FATWA DECLARED AGAINST JANNIES.

>>18227037

>>18227047
kek

>>18227047
THEY DO IT FOR FREE

Frosted Flakes are more than good... THEY'RE GRRRRREAT

>>18227066
kek

>>18224861
>Good luck not getting murdered if you do track them down
Does this really happen?

>>18225283
I’ve done both. Construction was inconsistent but had the hottest days, kitchen was consistently hot(but I’d stand in the freezer for a minute to cool down).

>>18225941
I worked in M&A and made good money while surprisingly wanking most of the time, the work in itself was almost fun.
I also worked in a call center as a student and it was hell with minimum wage.

>>18226634
>You don't want that brown crispiness going on in eggs.
wtf, who prefers non-crispy eggs? That's the best part.

>>18224720
you're so fucked lol
my advice is to show up reeking of weed so they fire you before the shift even starts. that way you don't embarrass yourself

>>18224699
why would you do this when literally EVERY industry is SO FUCKING DESPERATE for any/all workers that you can walk into $25/hr jobs literally anywhere right now?
if you dont mind physical labour or a trade you can easily double/triple that amount.
are you retarded?

>>18226456
Some retard in our warehouse a few years ago who wasn't forklift trained thought it would be easy enough then picked up two ride-on lawnmowers and immediately dropped them. Bullshitting forklift credentials is a surefire way to fuck yourself over

oh it's this thread again... you're fucked
>>18227047
this will never be irrelevant

>>18225544
>found the boh incel
After I fuck the hostess in the ass then ghost her, you can be her shoulder to cry on. Maybe one day shell see you as more than a friend
>>18227001
Why isn't anyone replying to me

>>18225409
add seasoning

>>18227441
>you can walk into $25/hr jobs literally anywhere right now?
>if you dont mind physical labour or a trade you can easily double/triple that amount
where the fuck do you live?

>>18224846
Thanks a lot for the video mate, I struggle with simple things,bit autistic and this points out skills that I need to refine within myself. Simple I know but thanks mate.

Any more videos that point out useful tips for starting a new entry level job and what an employer would be looking for whilst K I S S, much appreciated.
Thanks again

>>18227662
Probably USA, UK, New Zealand, Australia, or the Republic of Ireland.

>>18227662
Outside of the basement

>>18227669
>>18227679
$75/hr? it's a seller's market rn but don't make shit up

>>18227682
Do you reckon your noodle arms can shear 30 sheep in an hour if so I've got some work for you

>>18226634
>nasi gorenglet detected

Looks like op got fired

>>18227741
They might have to give him a pay rise to show up tomorrow when some other guys friends sister has the coof

>>18227741
I just got home. They asked me to stay a few hours extra because the 11 to 6 cook called off. So from midnight to 6 it was just me and the manager in the kitchen. They said I did well. It got slow after 3 and I just did a bunch of cleaning. The rushes got a little overwhelming because I didn't know how to build all the recipes, but the manager bailed me out when I got buried.

>don't talk about your wages

lol, they're underpaying him

>>18227764
oh NO NO NO NO NO

>>18227769
Pretty sure they're underpaying everyone.

>>18227773
>restaurant employees
>underpaid
Most of those retards are overpaid if anything.

>>18227805
Yeah, almost everyone there is a retard. One of their severs is literally living in a van in the back corner of the parking lot.

>>18227821
Thanks for the fun thread OP.

Congratz, OP, you magnificent bastard.

>>18227764
Good job bro you showed all the wagie restaurant workers what's up. It's literally a job 16 year olds do. All these full grown adults acting like their "career" is so difficult... I haven't laughed this hard in years! Thanks for the thread, OP!

>>18226628
kek absolutely based. i also work in finance/accounting and exaggerated my responsibilities into a role i'm not really qualified for, boss loves me.

>>18228154
what a fucking mess

>>18225944
found a seething retard

Thank you for a good thread, OP. But thank you even more for showing these self-involved retards that ANYONE could do their job and it is not hard. I hate listening to these idiots gripe about their shit job. I'd love to see any of you show up in the courtroom and try to do what I do. Oh wait, you can't even try because you need to be a member of the bar to practice law. Fucking pathetic cunts.

>>18226465
I've been hearing that constant stream of *chtchrrrtchhtchrrrt* the whole time reading this thread.

>>18226595
>>18226793
>>18226795
>>18226863
Great job anon, I knew you could do it!

line cucks forever BTFO by OP. Enjoy your permanent nerve damage, bad back and lung cancer