/ck/ - Food & Cooking

why post this shit?

My boss told everyone how good this was on the job site. Bought like 10 bottles on Amazon and passed them out. He was also a young guy who looked like picrel.

I stopped at chik FIL a on the way home and doused a sandwich in it.

It was pretty good, but I don't get so excited about food products.

>>17979025
they bought an ad, jannies post the ad in the form of an "organic" thread

are you seriously so dumb that you don't know how 4chan actually works? lol

>>17979050
don't narc on the 'vark, dude! not cool!

>>17979020
>*velcro scratches*

>>17979020
Hey folks, just wanted to let everyone know this reddit ketchup is a huge scam!

The first ingredient is TOMATO and it is just SALSA REBRANDED as hot sauce so that it can be MARKED UP heavily. Lmfao who pays 8 dollars for a tiny bottle of salsa? Seriously?

>>17979507
Wow. I never though out of it like that! Fuck I hate getting ripped off. The stupid salsa reddit ketchup didn't even taste good at all.

>>17979507
Unfathomably based.

>>17979507
Tastes pretty good.

Redpill me on making a copy cat at home for cheap.

>>17979535
Gladly. Here's the igredient list:

Ingredients: Tomatoes (tomatoes and fire roasted tomatoes, tomato juice, citric acid, calcium chloride), White Wine Vinegar, Carrots, Water, Yellow Onion, Habanero Chile Pepper (habanero chile peppers, water, salt, citric acid), Mustard (distilled vinegar, water, mustard seed, salt turmeric, spices), Organic Cane Sugar, Salt, Modified Food Starch, Garlic, Sunflower Oil, Herbs and spices.

I would start with 1 can of tomato, one can of fire roasted tomato, use the juice from 1 can strain the other.

2 carrots, and one onion, however many habaneros and garlic you want. 5 cloves would be a nice starting point for my tastes.

Chop everything up. I'm not sure if they cook everything before blending. I know some salsas cook their ingredients first, so maybe try one with one without.

Blend everythinf fairly fine.

Taste.

Add mustard, salt, sugar, and the white wine vinegar to balance everything out to your liking.

You've just made a ton of salsa for probably 10x less.

Herbs and spices would need to be experimented with, but the salsa will be fine without.

Enjoy. :)


>they use seed oil in a salsa. LMFAO LOOOOOL.

>>17979557
>SEED OIL IN SALSA! FUCK!

I will never buy such poison garbage. Thank you so much for giving me a great starting point to make my own healthy salsa.

>>17979557
Fuck these stupid shills! I'm going to share your recipe with all my friends and family!

>>17979020
Hey Shill OP, how close was I to your salsa recipe? >>17979557

I'll be sure to make it soon and make a thread and detailed pictorial on the clone recipe. Every. Single. Thread. You ever make will have the truth about your scam and a better recipe for 1/10th the price. :)

>>17979507
BASED BEYOND BELIEF.

>>17979020
The address where it started at is a historically jewish part of town. Makes you go hmmmmmm.

>>17979507
aardvarksisters, they're making fun of us

>>17979020
i caved and bought a bottle. it's just spicy sweet salsa with chipotle seasoning vibes. I'd rather go with homemade habanero sauce or fuckin crystal than this shit.

>>17979020
Glad to see you guys are doing well enough to have a marketing department again. Congrats on the new job and enjoy the archives.

'vark slander? on MY /ck/?

>>17979020
>For me? It's Secret Ardvark Premium Hot Sauce®, the perfect blend of taste without compromising on that 'varkin hot spice we all know and love... it's not just a sauce, it's a lifestyle!

>>17979020
stay varkin' bro!!!!!!!!

>>17980580
Extraordinarily based. Use my recipe as a starting point to make your own. >>17979557

>>17982360
>>17982255
Please explain the use of poisonous seed oil in your reddit ketchup.

How fucking old is this meme? I am considering buying some online because I like the little ardvark. Is it good sooce?

>I'm american and sugary tomato is spicy for me

>>17982562
been a 'varker since 2018, i think that's when it first appeared on the chanz

>>17982562
>>17982619
DO NOT BUY.

READ >>17979507 , >>17979557 IT'S INCREDIBLY IMPORTANT. DO NOT FALL FOR THE SCAM.

>>17979050
how much commission do the jannies get?

>>17982954
Don't care, it taste good and is like 5 bucks on sale

>>17982964
don't listen to him, he's one of those people we call SUCKAAAS in the 'varknation!

i wish i got paid to spread the holy word of the 'vark!

>>17983003
I see shit getting shilled on all boards, I know something is up when the regulars get their threads taken down for advertising, but the big/established names get a free pass.

>>17983014
i'm just a 'varkficionado citizen of the 'varknation!

>>17982967
Lmfao how poor are you making such horrible financial decisions? You really pay 5 dollars for less than 8oz of salsa? Are you serious? I guess it's all that seed oil you're consuming.

>>17983003
>>17983019
Please explain the poisonous seed oil you put in your reddit ketchup.

OH GOD I'M GONNA VAAARK

I like Secret Aardvark but I am scared to go any deeper into the specialty hot sauce realm

>>17979507
hot sauce and salsa are the same thing

>>17983553
salsa can be chunky, hot sauce is always runny and liquidy.

>>17983557
What white people call "hot sauce" is just vinegar based salsa.

>>17979050
Based,
but take your meds, schizo.

Sometimes I just gotta shout it from the tallest building, or the tallest peak, don't matter to me: Vark hard, Vark well, Vark often

I got memed into trying this when I saw it at the store a few years ago. It really is just shitty slightly spicy ketchup. Tossed it into the garbage after a few days.

>>17983014
They have CSG on /g/ filled with affiliate links. Anyone else who does something similar gets yeeted. If someone makes the next thread without their affiliate links, thread deleted and new one made immediately with affiliate links and remains up.

... but what's the secret?

>>17983575
Salsa can be whatever spicy tomato sauce you want. Hot sauce carries a different meaning. How are you just discovering the definition of words across cultures?

>>17984286
The secret is that it's a scam and you could very easily make 10x as much for the same price.

>>17984265
INCREDIBLY BASED. GOOD JOB. I reccomend giving them 1 star reciews on everything for them being a scam, poisonous seed oil, and shilling on a racist alt right nazi 4channel.

>>17984327
how much do (((the))) pay you for your anti 'vark shilling?

>>17985043
Please see post(>>17980570)

>>17985085
'vark is a white man's sauce

>>17984286
Aardvark surprise!

>>17985095
>>17985043
It's literally in a historic jewish part of Oregon

>>17985106
what now? the silly little goyim are upset about our superiority again? send 1000 more stromg black bvlls to their location, stat!

>>17982619
shut up new fag, i've seen posts about this shit back in like 2011

I like it and keep an a bottle of Secret Aardvark, Chulhula and Tabasco Sriracha in my work truck

>>17986547
Do you like getting ripped off and consuming poisonous seed oils as well?

>>17979020
Aardvark is alright but picrel is better