/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>17810094
>tfw you will never enjoy a rat burger nor pizza hut/taco bell fine dining with prime sandra bullock in the near-future-utopian-dystopia
it hurts bros

>>17810154
>>17810159
didn't you post those in the last thread too ?

>>17810090
God fucking dammit

>>17809906
Pathetic

>>17810159
Why does he open the bag like that

>>17809908
Stopped watching when the kraut started to boil a bird with zwiebelwhatkin and pweffernoose until a paste. Britbong level food.

>>17810290
Did you just get a stroke while writing that post?

>>17810202
Because every pretentious cook has to stay pretentious. And even regular daily things must be done with extreme pathos and pretentiousnes

>>17810301
Did you stroke your dick while posting that reply?

>>17810384

>>17810120
maybe when meat eaters are driven into sewers and vegans populate surface

>>17810418

Requesting egg boy in the egg fortress truck making egg sandwiches

>>17810481
here you go bro

>>17810199
He was performing for /ck/ in 2006, so yes pathetic.

>>17811070
that's pretty cool

>>17811129

WEBM threads have gone severely downhill in the past weeks

>>17811129
They're still around, very useful if your signature holiday dish is an apple pie. I've never seen one as elaborate as >>17810199 before, looks like the kind of thing you'd use if you used a ton of apples in a commercial setting, I think he added that steel plate for portability and normally you'd just mount it on a workstation.
Pic rel is the most common style sold nowadays, they're all over.

>>17811775

>>17811798
if he figures out how to fold it by swishing the pan around, then is able to fling it behind him onto a plate, he'd be the omelette master

>>17811183
Nice and rusty

>>17811805
ah the classic "pour water on the grill to make a much of pointless steam" trick.

>>17811823
this takes longer, looks worse, and probably tastes inferior to just using a griddle on the stove. Not even healthy, look at all that fucking spray oil.

>>17810397
>climate change drives humans underground
>no vegans allowed
ideal

>>17810100
At least it wasn't hot oil... but yeah, this is why I never rush in a kitchen while carrying stuff.

>>17810204
Jeeeeeesus Christ.

>>17811823
Took like 15 minutes, and he didn't even have any meat. 10 minutes to cook one egg?

>>17811837
free iron

>>17811794
Those things work for like 4 or 5 pies tops before they stop peeling

>>17810100
>>17812052
>At least it wasn't hot oil.
Even worse melted sugar, or caramel. If that shit gets on your skin in can burn you to the bone, because of how much heat it retains.

>>17811823
>Cut the muffins in half
nigger wtf are you doing, this is way worse than anything else

use a fork or don't waste an English muffin

>>17811070
That looks potentially dangerous

>>17810094
>this is a rat burger?
>takes another bite
i laff errytiem

god I wish this were me

>>17810100
lmao get rekt fuckin nerd

>>17810165
bros i need this in my life.

>>17810418
That's not what I meant when I said I wanted to fill your buns and make it hot and saucy!

>>17812543

>>17812507

>>17810384
Never stop stroking, anon.

>>17812569

>>17811837
Annoying and bitchy

>>17812580
Peak performance

>>17810202
Maybe his hand hurts.

>>17812507

>>17812598
fucking trash pandas

>>17812589
Here ya go Jack...

>>17812447
all that money, engineering, ingredients, manpower, and it's for one of the worst things ever made

>>17812630

>>17810100
I remember this commercial airing on TV. Accidents don't just happen!

>>17812580
Why does he walk like that?

>>17812630
Is this literally designed for amputees?

>>17812666

>>17810204
What the fuck are those?

>>17812674
Unironically yes.

>>17812753
That's quite based. It does seem like it would make life easier for them (except for the whole thing being quite bulky).

>>17812756
True. My sister in law is a occupational therapist (dunno if the term translates to the USA) - her job is to help rehabilitate people with life changing issues.

Mainly physical issues - they have access to some amazing kit that when you see it you think fuck that's so simple! And yet it changes people's lives.

Can openers that can be operated without hands (stumps only) sort of thing. Even simple stuff like a stick that helps my mum put her shoes on herself (she has advanced Parkinsons so it's quite difficult for her).

>>17810159
>salts the fritos
>salts the haloumi
Every fucking time

>>17811823
Why not put egg in by itself first so the bread isn't cold when you combine?

>>17812666
Blew out both achilles doing half of a 5k walk

>>17812794
The heat from the egg cooks the bread

>>17811441
>Churchkhela is a traditional Georgian cuisine candle-shaped candy. The main ingredients are grape must, nuts, and flour.
neat. it seems like everyone makes their own for later or something, too. looks like a comfy tradition.

>>17812373
You're supposed to cut them.

>>17812373

>>17812691
my nigga on the left corner up is watching all of it happen and being fucking traumatized

>>17810301
I think he was speech to texting

>>17813040
>takes so long to do he has to put in a fucking jump-cut

>>17809912
for some reason i find this pepe very cute, i think because he is in such a vulnerable position and shocked/caught.

>>17812449
when in rome

>>17810100
nightmare.. be careful

>>17810159
here is your michelin chef

>>17809906
Always a comfy thread

>>17811837
The rust adds flavour

>>17813745

>>17814199
god damn, I didn't know tiktok was around when nikocado was a kid

>>17810202
Because the bag later becomes a vessel. The sloppa goes back in the bag for serving

>>17814199
that stupid god damned grin before he drops a handful of flour into his eyes is funniest shit I've seen this year fucking hell

>>17810204
mazel tov!

>>17812794
Too high IQ move for an air fryer user

>>17814471
technology was a mistake

>>17812732
https://youtu.be/858SqPwixwg?t=144
korean food init, apparently they're called penis fish and are a type of sea worm they love to eat over there.

>>17813040
This looks just as effective as using a knife and takes maybe 5 times longer.

>>17810154
Who's that dude? I've never seen such a perfect burnt bread cold sandwich. He should open a restaurant.

>>17810290
>doesn't like presswurst
filtered

>>17810199
i often feel that people who do this are more performance artists than cooks. if they focused on learning what they were making they wouldn't need to develop circus clown skills.

>>17810159
Why the fuck is Gordon cooking Fritos in the middle of pit lane at COTA? COTA sucks shit, go cook at Silverstone or something.

>>17813040
>doesn't go full fork and use the fork handle for the butter
what's the point

>>17811844
>water
Its actually vinegar. Always hated the sour taste of Tantuni.

>>17812367
this one >>17811183 clearly has a replaceable blade. you can see the screw in the back holding it in. likely so does the big blue one. amazon crap likely would not i guess.

>>17817252
I never tried those, just the amazon crap in the one I was replying to. If you know where I can get one a bit more heavy duty that isn't an antique I'm all ears because I just might get one.

Last two can openers , died within a month, thanks China.

>>17810497
the eggman does not enjoy you recording

>>17810094
Best adaption of Brave New World so far desu

>>17810094
predictive programming

>>17810100
One of our waiters is a retard and never says when he's behind me.
I think about this video every day.

>>17812449
a man finishes what he starts

>>17817761
That's nasty, I don't understand people who eat seabugs. Disgusting.

>>17817968
Is there also a bacon and cheese option?

>>17810199
But the skin is healthy.

>>17810100
Happened to me before but thankfully it was a lukewarm porridge.

>>17811447
People are weird

>>17812569
Excuse me, was that chocolate? In a chicken dish?
Why?

>>17812564
Is this a bootleg gorden Ramsey restaurant improvement show?

>>17812593
Hes a big guy

>>17814471
If I ever see those, I'm gonna pick them up and smash them.

>>17818161
Could be dark chocolate, which is mostly cacao. Seems like a light dusting, so just as a flavoring? Wouldn't overpower too much.

But I'm giving Jack too much credit.

>>17817968
How does she get out of there?

>>17818164

>>17818237
If it was a meat roast Id get it, but chocolate and chicken, that makes no sense at all.

>>17818260
>I deserve 15$/hr

>>17817968
Is that basically a yorkshire pudds batter with bacon and egg?

>>17810159
Why does everyone post this shitty short version now where you dint even see the finished product?

>>17818237
>But I'm giving Jack too much credit.
>make sure chicken had a temperature of 185F
Yeah you are.

>>17812052
No shit, retard. It’s a cautionary video. Did you think this was real?

>>17818164
Holy shit an oven fire video were someone actually does something smart

>>17817754
absolutely mind boggling the amount of processing power that his brain is doing trying to understand why his world just turned upside down........ and then a puff of cacao, lmao

>>17812634
English muffins rule you philistine

>>17810418
>go to subway
>spend an extra 50 bucks for extra meat on my sub
>sandwich artist jews me by putting 3 pickles on a footlong

>>17818583
Because women are cute and smart and have pleasing voices and nice smells.

>>17817663
atomic shrimp is that you?

>>17818190
Don't do that, they've got cameras and you'll be liable for damages.
Instead, tip them over. They'll have to pay some wagie to come out and retrieve them, you won't have to pay anything because you didn't destroy it, and whoever ordered food still gets fucked.

>>17818577
No? Why do you think i did?

>>17818164
>gas is still on the stove
we don't use gas in our country but isn't it a good idea to turn that shit off?

>>17814928
Cool cooking vessel, massive waste of plastic

>>17817982
They taste good

Why is it always the same garbage in these threads? There's rarely any new garbage.

>>17809908
I thought was going to be some joke about how rediculus german words are but it's actually a serious cooking webm.

What the fuck

>>17818166
Yes and no. The license was sold to Finland and they made their own version of it.

>>17818780
Smart Thanks

>>17818994
Probably doesn't make much difference as it's already burning (so it can't explode) and not contributing to the oven fire.

Reauesting the whore making an Old Fashioned in a Tom Collins glass
>>17819534
>t. Chinese kid webm

>>17819534
We live in an illusion

>>17818254
she doesn't, they just built it around her like the vendotron gun runners uses in new vegas

>>17810397
Vegans can't even drive themselves into their wives

>>17812666
Diabetic feet

>>17819534
Imagine forcing your kids to perform in front of a camera for Internet points

well, which videos should be made into new webms?

>>17817968
Dumb question but Asians are able to eat American cheese right? Considering it's just hydrogenated oil?

>>17811438
I kinda want one but I just know the blades are trash-tier

>>17812351
As a jew, I feel it's kind of disrespectful to put kosher salt on ham. Could you please use another type of salt when making this meal? Thank you.

>>17812543

>>17812981
You're supposed to use a fork to separate them along the natural air pockets inside like >>17813040 shows.

NOOKS AND CRANNIES FOLKS, NOOKS AND FUCKING CRANNIES

>>17813638
the jump cut was pointless
>>17815063
oh no, halving an English muffin took 7.5 seconds with a fork to make it way more enjoyable than mechanically cutting it in half with a knife in 1.5, the whole world is gonna end my dude

>>17819759
To be fair, it's not gonna make much difference to that dry-ass, unbuttered egg sandwich.

>>17819759
It's better if you cut.

>>17810418
kobraJFS would be proud of this concoction TMDWU

Knife skill videos are the only ones that do it for me anymore

>>17820539
That's not how you're supposed to process lettuce.
You're not supposed to use knives on it in the first place. Cutting off the end of the head is even weirder.

>>17819534
look, the newb wants OC from 4chan
Everyone laugh at her

>>17820312

>>17810159
>vile

>>17811798
still not letting a tard handle my food

>>17812753
based

>>17813599

>>17820656
calm down anon, it's a silly cartoon.

>>17819715
it said beef bacon right in the video you low IQ so and so

>>17820656
looks like cabbage

>>17812794
Why put a slice of fucking Kraft "EBT poverty" sliced cheese on anything?
Why not just fry a fucking egg?
If you really want to be lazy why not just boil an 18 pack of eggs on Sunday, then make egg salad and fry that spread on the muffin for 5 minutes?
Why not add vegetables and/or meat if it's already taking you 20 fucking minutes?
Why not just microwave a fucking frozen egg muffin thing if you're eating that shit tier of white bread muffin with Kraft "Now Melts!" Singles?
Why eat at all if? you're that fucking useless just kill yourself.

>>17810165
Raccoons are so cute

>>17812784
Perfect translation.
Occupational therapists and Physical therapists are more important than doctors but less so than surgeons and I will fight any non-specialized medfag over this.

>>17810154
the heat of the board melts the cheese

>>17812373
just found out you roll english muffins and they come apart

https://youtu.be/tv4MPZe2dro

>>17812634
dude what. premade english muffins are the best cheap premade processed bread product you can buy. better than any off-the-shelf sandwich loaf, by far. if you want cheap bread with a nice crumb and texture that you can buy anywhere and keep on your counter for like two weeks you can't beat an english muffin. are you eating them untoasted or something?

>>17819624
>never learned how to cook
good parents you had

>>17818457
I think more look how dangerous it is

>>17815209
dumb and insecure pilled post

>>17821146
>Retard does everything wrong because he lacks even basic life skills, like knowing you don't throw water on a grease fire.
>"Look how dangerous it is!"
Kys.

>>17817761
Imagine the footjobs

>>17818457
to put out a fire? yea. otherwise enjoy your business getting burned down, I don't want to lose my life or become permanently crippled

>>17819546
>Germany
>humour

>>17817761
>feet1
how big collection you have?

>>17819534
You Ok you posted this WebM in the last thread.

>>17817541
not really, my go to strategy for getting around planned obsolescence like that is to buy vintage. otherwise it seems like for a lot of things the only option is a pro tool (i.e. expensive), which i guess is what the big blue one is. seems one like the green one can be had on ebay for around $50 shipped. the blades look like a special size though; could be a PITA

>>17810154
anyone have the copypasta?

>>17811447
peanut butter eclipses the taste of most other foods you put on it. peanut butter and sauerkraut is the same story.

>>17811447
Ugh. What is wrong with people?

>>17818190
very original idea, I havent heard a thousand tough guys say this in the past five years at all

>>17819245
what plastic? the fucking "tablecloth"? its less plastic than you've used in the past hour you idiot american.

>>17820683
who has the one of him nearly starting a grease fire when trying to make fries

>>17811798
> downies enjoying being a line cook

>>17812463
> raclette is now off season

>>17816429
Typical amerilard mart

>>17817761
Wait where are her arms?

>>17819534
> Tiger mom parenting

>>17822114
Did you miss all the chingchong chinamen? You'd think they were trying to gobble up stray dogs or foreskin or something the way they're going at it.

>>17811798
His smile was the best thing I've seen all day.

>>17813599
>Go, tell your people what happened here.

>>17811805
cool, a philly cheese steak.

>better chef than 85% of /ck/

>>17818190
leave it alone Jamal

>>17811070
looks based

>>17814199
this looks highly irresponsible

>>17822465

>>17822625
>eating animals that eat poop, trash and meat

>>17820456
Holy shit please share more knife videos. What a fucking embarrassment lmao

>>17822637

>>17812598
i hate when coons take forever to order.

>>17820456
>>17822639
i don't even cook but is the option to cut the side so you have a flat surface and then cut it?

>>17810159
I think he just doesn't give a fuck since he knows no one ever learns shit from his cooking and is just making a joke by making vile cheap shit while acting like he's a professional chef teaching people how to cook

>>17811070
Perfect for anal penetration.

>>17822686

>>17822737
yeah that's what i thought

thanks

baffling that people can get people to record them and plan it all out for a video and not have basic critical thinking skills

>>17822686
>>17822739
She can't even cut it down the middle because the knife is dull and she's a retard.

>>17821870

>>17822701

>>17820738
Holy shit is it easy to troll you people

>>17822041
Yes, the plastic "tablecloth" they have to swap between every eater. You sure are upset about it, are you ok?

>>17822660
What a bunch of savages.

>>17819534
This is child abuse. I'm glad I live in a country where this doesn't take place.

>>17813696
I don't get it.

>>17823166
>swipe his sweaty forehead with the cloth
>swipe the chopping board with the same cloth

>>17818602
this and vanilla extract.

>>17821361
dont ask a question you dont want an answer to.

>>17823336
why do you assume i don't want to hear the answer?

>>17823368
The answer is one. I doubt that is what you wanted to hear.

>>17823372
well i heard the answer and i am a bit disappointed of your lack of dedication

>>17817754
I made this exact same mistake when I was 25. Was going through my cousin's house while pet sitting, and boy my disappointment was immeasurable.

>>17812691
Watch the floor to the right at 0:34

>>17819534
Smoke in my eyes.
Give thumbs up!
But smoke in my eyes.
Give thumbs UP!!
> Also, that WebM was made by OP "China can't get YouTube"

>>17823459
Normal people (i.e. people not poisoned by modernity) don't care about a little bit of smoke in their eyes. I'll bet you a hundred bucks that kid didn't feel a thing.

>>17823497
You have to realize when your heart's on fire smoke gets in your eyes.

>>17811441
>>17812961
No wonder americans are so fat.

>>17811798
>Hello? I ordered my stack of pancakes an hour ago!

>>17823517
>Georgia
>Americans
Hoo boy.

>>17823211
the sweat from the forehead disinfects the cutting board

>>17823459
It's a fuel-air explosion obviously, but what's the fuel? What happened?

>>17811823
>Takes bite
>Gets mouthful of black pepper
>Choke, cough, splutter
>Breakfast ruined.

>>17814212
I love potato curry dishes. I need to find that webm of the perfect rice.

>>17817761
i really dont get it. why do people like footjobs when the mouth and pussy are right there? it just doesnt make any sense

>>17811447
I've heard PB and pickles is tasty so this must be similar

>>17817687
He knows he can't do anything because he can't get out until he finishes all the eggs

>>17812691
>Chad Frenchman surviving on frogs while amerifat need another burger

>>17818190
>If I ever see those, I'm gonna pick them up and smash them.
The video was taken infront of Kadaka Selver in Tallinn. You see them there quite often. Have fun and film it

>>17822056
You need sound for that. webm don't do it justice
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7E4StlboB48

>>17822637
But lobster is delicious

>>17811441
Georgian food utterly mogs everything in the region. of course central asian and turkish cuisine is good, but Georgian stuff is just unique, great wines and hospitality as well
vidrel is reduced grape or other fruit juice dried on a string of nuts, delicious

>>17810154

>>17811805
>he will never obliterate your ass and then make you lunch

>>17813055
American alcohol culture is so bizarre

>>17812691

>>17811805
>turkish
>gloves
That bitch is in Los Angeles

>>17812630
>filename

>>17811070
Would have never thought to use my Betty Crocker Cock Mangler Pro for this.

>>17811438
the vaguely soviet-style font at the beginning really sells this one for me

>>17825450
Mmmm, so juicy.

>>17822660
>AsianStreetMeat
this used to have different meaning...

>>17812593
From what?

>>17809908
I bet sliced more thinly and fried on a pan would make a good breakfast meat.

>>17810165
if you are a mean fucker put out a bowl and sugar cubes and a bowl of water, they will try to wash the sugar cube and it melts :^(

>>17812988

>>17827051
You can just use it as spread as it is even better with butter or the like, not sure with this specific recipe however

>>17818164
what was that, flour?

>>17829309
baking soda

>>17822660
That's a big dog.

>>17818254
she has to eat all the pastries

>>17817968
I'd have that

>>17829402
4U

>>17815209
i usually see this sort of thing from food cart vendors in third world countries. makes sense, serving one or two simple dishes all day will drive you to make it interesting / challenge yourself somehow

>>17810204
I was not prepared for that

>>17819534
This one isnt new either.

>>17818260
Why is the extinguisher way up on the ceiling ?

>>17824503
its weird to see him with dexterity in both hands. how long has it been since the third stroke

>>17809908
I thought this was filling for some kind of pasta or pastry, what the fuck coca cola chicken?

>>17818634
you doin alright mate?

>>17812351
Air frying is a bit of a meme, turns the foods texture into plastic, probably should add a bit of water at the bottom so it doesn't dry shit out too much.

>>17818073
No its not you nigger

>>17810094
i fucking love this movie so much

>>17812634
if you've only had cheap english muffins, you wouldn't understand.
buy the fork split muffins

>>17811447
do it with red onion pussy

>>17825425
Havent u died of aids yet you degenerate faggot?

>>17809908
>>17819546
What's actually wrong with it? Because they used a bottle and not a purpose-made plastic cylinder?

>>17817663
That's really cool for disabled people and noone else.

>>17819683
Yes. Asians can also eat most cheeses, unless it's cream cheese or very young cheese. Depending on how severe the lactose intolerance is cheese is usuall fine.

>>17822833
>olive oil
>Fruity, tangy and bold.
>Mild.
???

>>17811798
Us

>>17812449
Who cares what it is if it tastes good and won't kill you?

>>17810204
This kills the FTM.

>>17810418
Still better than any jootoob video where they want to make "the world's most expensive sandwich" and just end up putting wagyu, foi gra, and caviar on it.

>>17818161
Plus the fact that he's cooking the chicken to 185. That's gonna be dry as a motherfucker.

>>17811438
I'm so over shitty plastic gadgets with tons of fiddly parts that need to be washed.

>>17811844
Making steam is fine if you capture it under a bowl to melt cheese.

>>17834406
Furious Pete is only there to eat large amounts of food disgustingly fast with no shame at all.
I don't think he gives the slightest of fucks about cost or actual food type.

>>17823137
A child who appears to be perfectly capable of cooking his own food? How is that child abuse? I call that 'self sufficiency'.

>>17809908
This is basically kholodets and it's really not so bad. Not the most delicious dish and I wouldn't order it but also not the Satan's anus you all make it out to be.

>>17831254
It seems fine for making tater tots. For anything else, IDK, that's all I make in it is tater tots.

>>17812580
Did he have a stronk?

>>17823137
How is making food for himself and his little brother, an abuse?
You stupid whore, I could mak my own breakfeast since I was in first year of elementary

>>17814888
No, silicon valley techbros were a mistake.

>>17820456
Holy shit. It kind of pisses me off that my first thought when the video started was "tranny hands", and it turns out I was right.

>>17833253
when they walked in there still were no white people there

>>17833200
Where do I get a screaming pancake demon?

>>17811805
They make cheesesteaks in Turkey?

>>17826478