/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>17639092
>bottled piss
>eels
>methanol
>cigarette
interesting combination

>>17639062
WebM thread without the Surly King of the Egg Fort ?

>>17639092
gooks, absolutley gross<span class="xae" data-xae="skull">💀[/spoiler]

>>17640267
What kind of metallurgical sorcery enables this bullshit?

>>17640278
Leidenfrost effect

>>17640295
does it really have to be the same 40 jack clips every thread?

>>17639911
He gets every 97th Saturday off as per his unwritten contract. Let him sleep on the floor of his shack in peace.

>>17639911
how does he get out?!?!?

>>17639062
people eating this should be exterminated in nuclear fire

>>17640809

>>17640809
>>17640851
so you're just caramelizing garlic?

>>17640824

>>17640867
What is that?

>>17640876
why?

>>17640888
A timid man will ask "Why?" A bold man will ask "Why not?"

>>17640888
>Larvanga

>>17640902
little sloppy but that actually looks tasty

>>17640665
>broccoli beef without oyster sauce
the fuck

>>17640934
It's a whipeepo version, think the smell alone from oystersauce could make my friends wretch

>>17641120
It just seems like a crime to waste the potential of bacon on a non-crispy dish

>>17641052
This is one of the reasons why I am glad self-serve has been killed by covid. Goddamn I hate people.

>>17641177

>>17640265
jumped

>>17639076
Why would you want an appliance just to make pancakes shaped like mushrooms?

>>17641052
that man has such a perfect posture and form, he probably has a huge dick and nobody dares to call him out when he does that at a restaurant

>>17641052
And if you kicked his ass like he deserves everyone would call you a karen.

>>17641177
Just because it's a cut of pork belly doesn't mean it's bacon you pig American

>>17639087
>make omlette
>call it bread

that's your brain on keto-retardation

>>17641405
kys on the lips

>>17641403
why not just use a long-ass knife?

>>17641433
"We lost four more men to this firepit"
"If you can think of a better way to make bread I'd like to see it"

>>17640977
>Fanta

>>17641510
Why doesn't he change costumes for the characters? No customer is going to enter a cafe wearing an apron.

>>17641510
still not sure if I'd give """them""" a porkin or not

>>17641510
Kys you damn tranny

>>17641543
>he
???

>>17641525

>>17641720
As far as I know most fanta flavors (including orange) today in Europe is made with sweeteners instead of sugar (I have some danish fanta, green can that has no sweeteners). I have tried imported american fanta but that tasted even worse.

>>17641727
Forgive me if I'm wrong but shouldn't add the green onions to the fried rice when it is almost finished? That way they stay fresh and actually add something to the dish insted of becoming wilted greens

>>17641753
If you subscribe to the Uncle Roger school of asian cuisine, yeah.

>>17641433
What happens if someone falls inside the oven?

>>17641899
It would be very painful.

>>17641899
Wasted batch of bread and the tandoor is out of commission for the rest of the day

>>17641804
fake and gay

>>17641953
Just like your mom

>>17641958
Fake and gay

>>17641979
Just like your mom

>>17641985
that is beautiful

>>17640317
Umm, I don't think Jack makes lolicon pancakes.

>>17640866
Yes and no. It's the same chemical reaction that causes caramelization, but by culinary standards it's a different process to create it. Caramelization is generally quickly done in a pan. You can caramelize garlic like this, but it isn't black garlic. Black garlic is created by allowing the process to be done slowly at slightly higher temperatures, think around 130F is generally where it's kept. This allows the reaction to occur all throughout the garlic without burning it as would happen if you tried to do it quickly in a pan.

>>17640888
It looks like a honeycomb. People do eat them.

>>17640851
whats the point of all this effort? does it taste better or something?

>>17641396
It literally does though.

>>17641112
Is that a ceramic cleaver?

>>17642080
Yes...?

>>17642004
Just like my mom

>>17641472
It's too hard. You couldn't get even half of the blade in and any kind of cutting motion would be impossible.

>>17640977
>why yes, I suffer from kidney failure at 30 from sodium overexposure

>>17639076
This must be one of those made in America product

>>17640977
What I never understood about these food stands is that it always takes like 15 minutes for them to make one portion of these shits and I bet it costs like $0.05. What the fuck, how do they profit when it's all taking them so long.

>>17639101

are you gay?

>>17640876

dis nigga thinks hes steve

>>17642366
labeast would eat your reddit ass and still be able to beat the world record amount of ghost peper in a minute

>>17641727
they should call this dish dogwater because its literally dogwater

>>17641961
I know a professional rat killer who wiped an entire nest of them from a store/apartment building. He also knew how to prevent them from entering the building with firestop clay and toxic caulk.

>>17639062
2

>>17641753
Yes. The stupid cunt is a bad cook.

>"Be on the lookout for anyone seen doing an unusual amount of laundry, do not approach, call police first."

>>17642053
There was no need to add white chololate

>>17643208
What's going on?

>>17643208
>>17643222
I don't think they paid for those products. I hear in usa these days they can steal upto $900 worth of stuff and police won't even open an investigation

>>17643271
That can't be right.

>>17643222
Organized theft.
>>17643271
True, that's why they do it, also Tod might get arrested. So no one does anything.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GET23syD8Nw

>>17639076
Dope Playstation 3, bro

>>17641543
>he
you will never be a woman

>>17641729
God I hate coffee fags

>>17643284
He's right
It's only in California though.

>>17641961
average New York city convenience store

>>17643190

i get 2 3x3 animal style and murder them just like this guy but i go outside to be respectful. how does that gay nerd have videos?

>>17639062
>>17640824
>I don't want to eat the bugs because they're icky and gross! You can't make me!
Stop being such picky children. Not eating bugs is like not eating the crust or crying if your food touches each other.

>>17643416
No, what California did was set the bar for grand theft (i.e., felony theft) to $950. You can still be prosecuted for shoplifting or other retail theft below that, just not at a felony level.
This has led to bullshit stories like one police chief saying they couldn't prosecute someone because they brought a calculator with them to make sure they stole just under $950 worth of merchandise. Which is silly, because even if you can't charge them with felony theft, you can easily charge them with felony conspiracy to commit a crime. Of course the whole story is bullshit since who carries a calculator with them that's not their phone?

>>17640295
hot

>>17641510
she cute

>>17641510
i mean id fuck him but hes still a pretentious fag that needs a slap

>>17643673
Proposition 47
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kWtLgsQRtJI

>>17643673
>who carries a calculator with them that's not their phone?
Engineers, accountants, pretty much anyone who deals with lots of numbers.

>>17643735
Yes, I just explained it. Saying it emboldened anyone is bullshit being pushed by right wing rags who don't want to look at data and just go by feelings. The same people who say the SF DA isn't prosecuting petty crimes, when he's prosecuting them at a higher rate than any predecessor. But these right wing chambers just echo the same bullshit over and over because it makes them feel better to shit on "muh failed libral policies!"

>>17643747
Engineers? None I've met. And I deal with hundreds of the bastards. Accountants? No, they have Excel to to the math for them. Anyone else who deals with money just has the computer do it.
Anything they need in the field is just done on their phone. If it's too complex for their phone, they'd have their laptop with them.

>>17642080
It's the same way you make a cavendish tobacco so I assume it makes it sweeter

>>17641052
>you wouldn't download a soup

>>17643208
baby gurl got an ass like damn
>>17643749
>"real republican policies haven't been tried ye-"
shut up homo your state is garbage, and i swear to your faggy little spaghetti monster if you and your blue cronies over there start sweeping the homeless to the east i will personally come to your state and stage a fucking coup

>>17643833
San Francisco isn't liberal and hasn't been for some time. It's coasted off its liberal past, but every since Ed Lee bent over backwards to lure in the tech corporations, the whole city is exactly what happens when hard-right corporatocracy policy rules. Its GDP rises every year and its real estate values are explosive. Yet it does nothing for the rancid, runaway inequality. But neither do Republicans at a national level, yet you suck their dick when they pass a tax scam for the billionaires on the lie that it will trickle down.

>>17641720
lmao @ the editing here
>zoom in
>zoom out
>zoom in
>zoom out

>>17641753
The white part of a green onion (so like the first half closest to the bulb) is perfectly acceptable as an aromatic. however, the greener parts are best for garnish.

>>17644010
>g*rmans

>>17641899
YOU ARE ALREADY BREAD

>>17643288
I opened this gif, knew what was coming, and I still watched it all the way through

>>17643940
>>17643981
>>17643988
maybe if china wasn't so concentrated on eating everything that moves, they wouldnt have caused covid

>>17641804
>Uses jackfruit when lion's mane mushrooms are better.

>>17643848
i've never seen such an eloquently accurate roast. have an upboat ;)
says here Ed Lee is dead. what's the damage with the latest guy? i bet it's a woman. ha!

>>17641804
>>17641953
the one time I had a fake meat burger convince me it was real was when it was smothered in BBQ sauce. I would not be surprised if they genuinely thought it was good give that it was basically candied with how much they added.

>>17642060
Aren't latkes supposed to be super crispy? I've only made em a coupe times but every recipe I've seen essentially shallow fries them.

>>17640265
i see a face at :09. is he okay?

>>17643284
>That can't be right.
have you been asleep the past 2 years?

>>17644220
NOPE

>>17643284
George Floyd thing. Police decided they'll only arrest thieves if its over $1000 worth of stuff, to avoid "escalating"

>>17639092
Pangzai the legend.

>>17643208
if those people wanted to prevent that theft, why not pop their tires?

>>17644100
Covid was clearly made in a lab. Not that geoduck eating isn't disgusting.

>>17644482
It's not that clear. Its DNA doesn't have the typical markers of purposeful cultivation.

>>17641433
native yorkshite pudding

>>17643664
sorry goy, bugs aren't kosher. You can est them, my cousin Chaim even wrote an article about how good they are for the environment.

>>17644540
Grasshoppers are.

>>17644184
yeah those looks kinda shitty, but I've also met a lot of Jewish moms who couldn't cook for shit so maybe its normal.

>>17644100
dude we eat geoduck in WA. There's plenty of other things China eats to balk at, but bivalves are bivalves.

>>17641510
this is really just the same joke as the one pump joke and equally unfunny. that's how we know this is actually a woman and not a tranny

>>17643208
>that little pussy cuck cart toss at the end
lol What an effeminate faggot, too much of a pussy to stand up them with honor so lets do a little passive aggressive woman-tier damage after they're packed up and the """danger""" is passed.

>>17644461
and get their asses beaten. yeah, I wonder that too. more people need to escalate criminal acts. besides, they are just employees, they don't give a fuck

>>17642181
fame

>>17644505
lmgtfy "polybasic furin cleavage site"

>>17642042
Yes but normally people eat the comb with only honey in it and not with the bees in it.

>>17644327
>Police
It has nothing to do with the police, it was the politicians/DAs that decided this bullshit.

>>17644327
They decided that because people got upset with them murdering a guy who had stolen $0 worth of stuff? Police are weird.

>>17644955
Don't forget his arrest record.

>>17643749
>>17643848
>amerimutt seething
Not only you're a faggot, but you're also dumb enough to seethe at a right wing boogeyman, like a good corporate bootlicker you are. You might be blind to your own retardation, but not everyone else is.

>>17644955
Nah, american police is too soft.
That negro was a criminal and deserved it for being a druggie.

>>17644963
Good point, better murder him while he's subdued like he was in China.

>>17644986
Tell me again how much fentanal was in his system.

>>17640676

>>17644595
Do you just bite into it raw?

>>17639062

>>17645083
name?

>>17639092
I've never noticed until now that he eats from a bowl covered with plastic bag just so he doesnt have to wash it
grim

>>17645088
maya ali

>>17641316
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T1BDcI-tAfQ

>>17645094
Horseshits Vomit Chocolate

>>17643848
What is this insane cope? The mental gymnastics required to justify that SF is a city led by the right-wing just shows how delusional leftists are. After all, nothing screams right-wing like trying to rename a bunch of SF schools because they had George Washington or Thomas Jefferson in their names or making shoplifting have less punishments.
When liberal policies fail, you retards go back to the classic "no true scotsman" fallacy. Your bullshit about "hard-right corporatocracy" in fucking SF is the exact same bullshit as "true communism has never been tried" or "there is no such thing as left-wing authoritarianism".
Back in reality, SF needs corporations to finance their bullshit policies. And I don't notice any liberals making a noise when tech corporations are heavily in their favor politically, overwhelming donate to and support their causes, and also censor people liberals disagree with. No, it can't be that there is a left-wing technocracy in SF, where insane identity politics runs amuck and tech corporations pander to your retarded ideology by bending their knee whenever twitter comes out with its newest thing to be outraged about. No, only the right-wing can have a corporatocracy. When the corporations ideologically support the left, they are still right-wing because my city is a shithole and it's the fucking SF right-wing that is ruining shit.
You people are delusional morons and I seriously hope you walk in downtown SF, step on an infected needle covered with the feces of the homeless and die of some incurable disease. But meanwhile, please keep your retarded takes to yourself.

>>17641405
Id say its more a fittata but you're right. It's definitely not bread

>>17643209
It creates the "reveal" by covering up the top where the hole is. Idiot.

>>17645470
>>17645471
>>17645477
>American
>Is blatantly German

>>17640283
so basically I've been burning the underside of my eggs because the pan is too cold

>>17643848
>>17643749
>>17643673
wordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswordswords UMMM ACHTULLLLYY wordswordswordswordswordswordswordswords

>>17643981
Why the fuck would you want to eat that

>>17645495
newfag

>>17645471
For a second, I forgot what I was watching, thought it was like, sausage, mash and gravy and thought it looked good, then suddenly became disgusted with myself

>>17645512
Huh?

>>17640265
You do not fucking understand, how much i dream of chopping a snake that big in half with an axe. Or cutting it wide open with a knife from tail to head.

>>17640295
Holy fucking based

>>17642350
wait are you not?

>>17641905
you're a big guy sir

>>17643735
>not body slamming the jogger

>>17641433
That oven is clearly a practical joke
No one would realistically use it over an oven you access horizontally

>>17645633
can find these on the ground outside

>>17645477
>>17645471
>>17645470
Do amerisharts really?

>>17643749
the best part of this is that he's using a rented city bike. hilarious.

>>17641214
Don't know where you're at but self-serve is back around me. Cheaper to let the plebs do it themselves than hire a wagie to dole out soup.

>>17643848
>San Francisco isn't liberal

>>17642042
It's brood comb, not honeycomb. Big difference.

>>17639101
you couldn't pay me enough to be in this ad

>>17641985
It's called a fry up not a bake up, what a shit eating faggot this guy is

>>17645765
holy shit

>>17645586
want to get sued?

>>17644992
How much fentanal are you allowed before the police are permitted to murder you?

>>17645061
Korean mukbangers are gross too. Fuck all mukbangers actually.
That webm was just showing how to prep one you mong.

https://files.catbox.moe/nxm00o.mp4

>>17641052
I desire nothing else but to dropkick that fuck into that whole soup stand

>>17643673
Wait until you get a criminal mastermind who can add simple numbers together in his head.

>>17640809
>>17640851
the heat from the rice cooker cooks the garlic

>>17639062
>half a kg of dead bees :(

>>17644906
Not everyone gets your search results, I just get a bunch of research papers about how adaptable the spike protein is.

>>17641952
aren't bigger squid usually worse tasting?

>>17645094
>top 10 anime betrayals

>>17642607
You can easily wipe out their entire population with instant mashed potatoes.
Not sure if it is humane because I don't remember the exact science behind it, but if I remember correctly they go into a food coma and just don't wake up again.

>>17645500
I am so happy that this monstrosity will suffer a slow painful death

>>17647887
deep fried pasta will always be the most cringy shit

>>17645586
>Being a simp for big corp
LMAO

>>17647896
do blacks eat anything other than junk food?

>>17643673
Watch calculator.

>>17643673
>>17643749
>>17643848
Why do you still try on this shithole of a site?
It's been infested with over confident rightoids since the 2016 elections, shit got even worse when the_donald got banned.
Read the reactions to your posts, these fuckwits still think left means the democratic party.
Really, you're arguing with retards.

>>17639091
That looks awful

not enough jack webms

What do you hope to gain by spamming the same ancient unfunny webms that everyone has seen a thousand times?

>>17647881
Is he being held at gunpoint?

>>17648032
gain?

>>17648032
its funny to newfags
t. newfag

>>17647985
i want them gone
and i want you gone

they're right, it's legal to steal things in california, really helps offset how expensive the rent is since all my groceries are free, as long as i only steal $949 worth of hamburger meat at a time.

>>17643208
Is this J-ROC and the ROC-pile?

>>17648034
AK47 actually.

>>17640902
looks good.
why add the sugar to the onions though?

>>17647889
does uh, does this work on people too? asking for a friend

>>17648156
no because humans can vomit and rats can't

>>17642607

Is this him?

>>17647889
I remember this episode from The Boondocks?

>>17645765
I'm impressed.

>>17647889
what you just wrote makes sense to you? they go into a food coma? LOL

>>17642080
every single time i've had black garlic at a restaurant it tasted like ash

>>17648360
nigga garlic

>>17645477
>stuffs an onion into a hamburger patty
>OK, I'm down with this, probably makes for a good burger
>eats it raw
>mutter gottes

do you like this

do you like this

>>17641261
Is that some RecipeTinEats? Man, that woman's my go-to for anything Asian.

>>17642100
You were saying?

>>17648409
Nagi is Australian...

>>17645511
unironically yes

>>17648463
you're mom is australian lol get 0wned n00b

>>17642181
Retards are willing to pay double just for delivery
Guess how these food stands profit.

>>17643848
>democrat uni-party state and its most liberal city isnt liberal
Lmao what?

>>17648463
Asian Australian.

>>17648552
You have the brain of a child

>>17639082
Not a fan of szechuan style chinese food but chinese eggplant stir fries are so fucking good. I think it might be the best vegetable of all time for me purely because of it. I can even eat it without meat and be completely satisfied, these soy sauces the chinese come up with are fucking amazing.

>>17645512
READ NIGGA

>>17645471
I struggle to eat 3000 cal semi clean and this bitch is just devouring that. I am amazed.

>>17647985
dilate

>>17644048
Underrated

>>17648916
t. limpwristed dyel stick faggot

>>17639062

>>17648032
ja/ck/ never gets old

>>17648425
Would cause a lot of waste. Those little wedges open it cleanly

>>17639092

Westerners fear the rural China man

>>17639066
This is terrible!
I had no idea that the tomatoes I buy at the store have been handled so roughly. I shall demand a discount on all future purchases.
What if I get the ones from the bottom of the sack?

>>17640867
Neat.
I've been meaning to take a holiday there.

>>17641052
The heat from the soup sterilises the ladle.

>>17641510
I've got some white liquid for that cute enbie if you know what I mean

>>17641403
Ever heard of a chainsaw you faggot?

>>17641804
I was at a vegan restaurant a couple of days ago and they had loaded fries with this on it and a bunch of other stuff
It's honestly not bad at all, no way it could be mistaken for real pork, but still pretty good.

>>17645094
>>17645285
>>17647871
I've seen this with sound. The kid insisted on trying it after being told he wouldn't like it.
I'd say it's actually good parenting apart from her not making sure he only tried a little bit (a big spoonful could mess with his breathing)

>>17644048
You fool, you've only unleashed my final form!

>>17639101
Didn't ashens make a video about this gadget 10 years ago?

>>17643981
>first instinct is to open her mouth when it sprays

>>17649584
nah lol

>>17648402
based

>>17648020
there's something with jack and non-newtonian fluids.

>>17639062
What kind of Bushlandian cuisine is this?

>>17640867
>>17639062
May Allah forgive them for their sins but I sure as shit won't, alhamdullilah

>>17639092
literally me when the kratom toss&wash doesn't go as planned

>>17648402
>that knee kick to get it back on the umbrella
fucking awesome

>>17639091
Why are Eastern Euros so bad at making food?

>>17641510
I want to nut inside of that thing.

>>17647779
Y'know, I actually think this may be somewhat useful. Easy way to make bulk burgers of consistent quality without a big grill.

>>17650575
Centuries of poverty.

>>17639091
This is basically just a ramen omlette but the steps are completely fucked.

>>17650660
nah, you are almost completely giving up char on the patties for convenience.

>>17649993
GMO to make Tomato Sauce.

>1 If it is organic a “9” is added in front of the 4-digit product code.
>2 If it is genetically modified an “8” is added in front of the 4 digit product code.
>3 If it is conventionally grown it is either left as a 4-digit code, or a “0” is added in front of the product code.
https://youtu.be/xqbNuejnP_4?t=70

>>17645500
He's ukrainian

>>17647881
this nigga jizzed at a kitchen appliance

Wala

>>17648393
That's raw pork (Mett) which you usually spread on a roll. Guess she's on a no/low carb diet so it's just 1 Kg Mett for breakfast.

>>17641985
>10 minute to prepare everything, 30 min in the oven, 40 min to make breakfast, without cleaning after
by the time i am done, i am not hungry anymore.
>>17645534
>that cheap
from what year is that? 2000's ?

>>17651050

>>17648037
Why

>>17641952
>excuse me, sir, but this squid is rubbery
>AH! Sank you velly much!

>>17644590
jews generally cant cook for shit, that's why their cuisine is hideous

>>17650767
>oven dried
Isn't that known as BAKING?

>>17639087
bread is flour+water+heat

>>17645215
>japs have benis festivals
>still censor benises in porn
i dont get it

>>17651308

>>17652139

>>17652144