/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>17554154
Does it have to be an actual dish that tastes good? If not, just grind up all kinds of animals, add dairy, alcohol whatever and make a big heretic sloppa.
Bonus points for eating it during ramadan/lent etc.

>>17554154
Steak (Hindus can’t eat cow), slaughtered by an Hindu in the name of Vishnu (idolization, all Abraham religions), cooked in bacon lard (Jews and Muslims) with a shellfish and cream based sauce (crustaceans and mixing meat and dairy is nono for Jews).

That’s the main dish, what should the sides be?

>>17554215
the steak should also be cooked with blood to trigger the abrahamists again

a dangus

>>17554154
Semen

>>17554247
norse pagans would love that actually

>>17554154
human flesh. It does violate most religions and also almost the totality of states laws of the earth

>>17554275
obviously cooked in palm oil, so you also damage the planet

>>17554275
christians claim to eat human and god flesh at the same time every sunday so youre wrong
also the mesoamericans and africans would love that

>>17554164
Goal is for it to taste good/seem like a real dish I assume. I did a quick search as for what is forbidden:
Step 1: Add alcohol. Prefereably as a side and in the sauce. It's forbidden in a lot if not most religions. (Baha'i, Hindu, inslam, mormons and sikhs)
Step 2: Mix meats. A few religions are vegetarian by nature. To make sure use minced meat from various animals. The basics are including pork (against islam and judaism), but feel free to add others too just to make sure. Add eggs and a splash of milk to bind the minced meat better (milk isn't supposed to be mixed with meat in judaism) and use unkosher eggs. Maybe some blood too, you won't notice it really in the final dish but it will fuck with some religions. Bonus for cannibalism (or your own flesh). Ground up fingernails if you want to keep things legal. Exotic animals are good too, best if they are very smart (primates or octopus).
Step 3: The right preparation. Some religions practice seperation of ingredients where you have to use different tools for different ingredients. To make sure, mix and prepare all foods on the same cutting board with the same tools.
Step 4: The right time: I'm too lazy to do it, but take a calendar, mark religious holidays where one is supposed to fast/eat a certain way and find the day(s) with the most overlap. During those days eat in the middle of the day (not after sunset).
Step 5: Eat the wrong way: Most religions practice moderation so be a glutton. I'd suggest eating naked, unclean and unshowered, while drunk and blasting a mashup of satanic metal as well as MLG parodies of nasheeds. Have a slideshow of pictures of different deities on your tv. Bonus points for it being rule34. Have sex before, during or after the meal, use contraceptives and make sure to use the lords name in vain.
Step 6: Document it. I want to see it.

So a massive mukbang with burgers (patties from the minced meat), seafood, fast food, a lot of fat and a bunch of alcohol I'd say.

>>17554283
You don't know how to read don't you?

>>17554283
>good news everyone we're having human flesh tonight!
>*zulus mouth start to water*
>*waiter brings out baskets of unsalted wafers*

>>17554283
>christians claim to eat human and god flesh
god is not human, where did you get that?

>>17554298
is jesus not fully god and fully man? docetist retard

>>17554154
Human flesh violates all religions' dietary laws as well as the laws of man. It's the most taboo food on earth

>>17554355
wrong

>>17554355
indians, germans and scandis were happily eating flesh as recently as like 1600's, and 1300's ish. there are extant cannibal societies in who-cares-jungle I'm sure although won't look it up myself

>>17554381
idk about india but i call bullshit on germany and scandinavia being cannibal except during famines

>>17554391
american indians

>>17554412
IT'S NATIVE AMERICAN

>>17554435
bite me ;)

>>17554164
FORBIDDEN HAMBURGERS

>>17554448
since we're on the subject of cannibalism, sure

>>17554285
anon i love you

>>17554435
It’s a bunch of dead savages who cares

>>17554215
On a friday during ramadam of course

>>17554154
So it's only pork bacon and ham? The rest of the pig is fine to eat?

>>17554355
Christian eat christ's flesh and drink his blood.

>>17554311
>is jesus not fully god and fully man?
yes

>>17554783
No it's the whole pig.
The rule is animals have to both chew their cud and have a cloven hoof to be kosher.
Fish have to have fins and scales, so catfish is right out.

Why is goose okay but not swan? It's just a dire goose.

>>17554285
that image is truly cursed

>>17554285
Don't forget to eat it with your left hand. It's considered the bad hand by muslims because they wipe their poopoo with it

>>17555074
True, it's a bit of a social faux-pas to serve the car keys in the pie rather than alongside them. so people can add them to their slices if they want. But the rest is a real crowd pleaser, where else do you get lines like that.

>>17554154
imagine cucking yourself out of the most delicious foods

>>17554215
>Steak (Hindus can’t eat cow),
I know a Hindu temple that was made in an old Ryan's steak house. I am really curious why they did that, but I imagine it comes down to the location, its near an area where a bunch of Indians live, and it was probably a good deal.

>>17555103
do modern muslims still do that or is it just the crazy saudis or the afghans

>>17555181
Nah they don't wipe anymore

>>17555170
It's just a case of getting whichever spiritual leader to consecrate the place. There's a Sikh temple near me in the same building as a community center that sells booze. They consecrated their own half

>>17555186
but point being, yeah, it was probably a cheap buy