/ck/ - Food & Cooking

NOOOO DON’T DO I- AHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRHRGRGGGHHH

Let me hide in that corner 1km away first.

Uh oh

>>17487850
The trick is to open it right above eye level so that way the stink drifts up and away from you, just kinda hold it up above your head

Someone did this in a dorm a few years back and the whole building reeked for weeks so please don’t

>>17487854
>captcha N D0NT

>people complain it smells bad
>think they’re just exaggerating
>buy can
>open under water
>whole apartment smells like vomit
>the fish taste very sour
>throw it all away
>the smell stays for a solid week
Eat that shit outside

>>17487850
Gotta buy these and use them as stink bombs. Just hide them in a public or private place after you open it and never look back. I will continue serial stink bombings until I earn the moniker "Lil Stinker"

>>17487850
God I hate italian food

>>17487850
Don't listen to the other anons in this thread sempai! this food is very sugoi cute yummy desu and you should open it and dig right in to amazing oishi desu yo UwU

>>17487850
Whatever you do, open it outside and under water.

Make sure you clean the vessel in which you open it thoroughly afterwards.

Also, once you get over the smell, it's actually somewhat nice on flat bread with sour cream and onions.

>>17487850
The braap food to end all braap foods.

>>17487908
You can also do that with small chunks of durian, the area will soon start reeking of rotting corpses.

>>17487850
don't do it. Thats something special to share at work.

>>17487908

>>17487908
we sprayed liquid ass in the school stairwell for our senior prank I wish i had known surstromming existed back then I woulda used that instead liquid ass doesn't smell bad enough to make you dry heave and it goes away after an hour but I bet this woulda cleared out the stairwell for at least three days

>>17487850
I took that shit to Christmas dinner. One of the few times we had nearly the entire family there. Told my mom it was a special treat to be served as an appetizer. Cleaned the entire house before we even got close to dinner

>>17488445
>filename
Kek

>>17488416
The day you quit.

>>17487850
THINK OF THE CHILDREN

Rip

>>17487850
>1645926898562.jpg
>no timestamp

Imagine the factory that cans this stuff.

>>17487850
Bought one of those once. Opened it in the middle of nowhere with my friends. Pretty much everything it came into contact with had to be quarantined. Later when we got back indoors our clothes reeked of it somehow. I'd rate the power of the smell somewhere between vomit and skunk spray

>>17491005
Savor the flavor, if you will

>>17487908
That's illegal you'll go to jail.

>>17491046
The charges, officer?

>>17491054
Is only smells

>>17490961
Been awhile since I've seen this pic

>>17491056

>>17487850
Save it for lunch at the office breakroom.

Aren't those cans already under relatively high pressure?
What would happen if I threw one in a Flameless Ration Heater?
Why no, i am not trying to make a timed stink-bomb, Herr Officer.

>>17487908
Absolutely based

>>17487850
>making the can look exactly like a landmine
they knew exactly what they were doing

>>17494345
The Flameless Ration Heater heats the can and makes the Surströmming Uma Delicia

>>17487850

open the can but while its inside a large ziplock bag. as it rots and gasses come out, itll expand and eventually burst the bag, gives you a few days to escape AND the suddenly pop will flood the area with lots of odor instantly

>>17487850
ANON NO-

>>17487932
I... obviously bate or you deserve to be removed from the gene pool for everyone's sake... go get a map you ameritard

>>17487908
I used to do this whenever there was a test coming up or if I didn't want to go to school. Just put a can of Surströmming in the main ventilation intake and watch as they have to evacuate the entire school.
Eventually the school had to install camera surveillance for like a million SEK or something.

>>17496739
>a million SEK
whats that, like, 5 american bucks

Imagine shoving it up someone's ass and detonating it.

>>17488445
>people are still posting my gif
but i preferred my rig a tony name

>>17487850
you finna better not be

>>17496745
Yes, 5 American bucks. There there.

>>17496864
>SEK is worth about 10% of a US buck
oof

>>17496729
if it's not italian then why is it red and yellow?

>>17487850
>not my problem

>>17487850

>>17487908
My mother told me that one year when she was in school (back in the day when senior pranks still existed), a group of seniors put limburger cheese throughout the ventilation system in the school and the smell was absolutely horrendous.

>>17487908
t.Lil Stinker