/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>/ck/
>girlfriends
Lmao. No one here has a g. You don't belong on 4chan if you do anyway.

>>17337714
Some pasta with a side salad. Chicks love pasta.

>>17337714
one totino’s pizza

avoid beef since she's probably not a cannibal

>>17337714

>cooking dinner for your first date

are you retarded?

>>17337714
A FISTFUL OF MY POOP

>>17337727
I have a wife. You’re a fag. Also, this is 4channel.

I've never had a physical interaction with a woman. I'm 37.

>>17337714
My wife likes seafood and veggies, so something with those.

>>17337714
oysters and asparagus

>>17337757
Me either, but I still like to date them for a while before letting them know I'm not willing to be tainted by their sinful touch.

>>17337714
Fancy steakhouse where I order the most expensive thing on the menu. When you are finished eating, tell her that you just need to use the restroom for a moment and then leave her with the bill. Go home and masturbate yourself to sleep knowing that you are the superior sex.

beans, brussel sprouts, and onions

>>17337714
in the back of the trunk

>>17337714
>first date
Just make a small buffet arrangement of different bite-size foods. Sandwiches, wraps, dips, chips, carrot sticks, etc. That way there is minimum risk that she won't like any of it. Go with traditional flavour combinations like ham and mushroom, cheese and tomato, tuna and mayonnaise, etc.
Once you find out what she likes, then you can be a little more adventurous. Also make sure you are outspoken about what you like, so she knows what to cook for you. Cooking is an important wife skill, especially if you want children.

>>17337714
make her about 4-5 extra strong margaritas and never offer any food

>>17337858
Its clearly implied its a date between a man and a woman not a date between two fags

>>17337727
This, dating is immoral anyways

>>17337714
Eggs. A bowl of eggs. She must eat all of the eggs.

>>17337714
I made my now wife an omelet breakfast dinner. It was a little unusual, but it was also a test to see if she would be into that sort of thing. She was and now we're married. Bitches love eggs.

>>17337881
What would you suggest? A supersize big mac meal? A plate of nachos and cheese? Does that make you feel very masculine and heterosexual?

cock meat sandwich

>>17338005
The girl gets lobster, the guy gets steak. That's a heterosexual date.

>>17338005
you're retarded. making a plate of a million small things is dainty and effeminate, not to mention unfulfilling. it shows indecisiveness, cowardice, and to a woman, shows neither that you know how to please nor choose. even if such thoughts are not conscious on the woman's part, they are undoubtedly subconscious. if you want to look like a faggot, you make stupid, dainty shit like that. if you want to look like a normal person - let alone like a man - you make a dish that you like and can cook well. food is food, and even if a dish isn't spectacular or to your woman's exact tastes, it will be appreciated and eaten, supposing it's neither garbage cooked nor garbage raw.

>>17337714
women love charcuterie boards, get a bunch of fancy cheese, meats and crackers. Get some honey and jam on the side with some olives and stuff. You don't want anything too heavy in case you end up fucking

>>17338262
retard. red meat gives you energy as spurs to a horse. why would you want to have no energy on a "light dinner" versus having the enormous RED MEAT ENERGY that only ALPHA RED MEAT, cooked well, can give you?

>>17338280
it's for her, not for you. You would eat heavy beforehand dummy.

>>17337714
going to dinner for your first date at all is a terrible idea, let alone cooking it

Burgers. Ask her how she likes hers. If she won't eat a burger, trash her.

>>17338262
this is cute!

>>17337736
and for her?

>>17338250
OP said "make", not "order". Cooking both lobster and steak at home is too expensive and time consuming for a first date.
>>17338252
OP said "first date". It's an introduction, not a display of commitment and bravado.
>>17338262
This. Also a light bread to dip in your olive oil and balsamic vinegar.

>>17338262
>woman shows up catfished
>just you and her
>answer the door with a full suit and bowtie
>stumble through your own house trying not to wake mom upstairs
>she sees the "charcuttree" board of kraft singles, pepperoni, and great value crackers
>she calls 911 on the way out

>>17337858
>>17338313
And don't forget to finish off your romantic idea with a bowl of eggs

>>17338319
cant win if you dont play

>>17337737
Underrated

paella, bitches love paella

>>17337714
>gf
>first date
wut

>>17338329
Sure, why not?

>>17338633
>"do you like deviled eggs? I love em"
>casually eat the tray
>if she doesn't partake, she is infirm and unsuitable
Good test

>>17338646
That was just the first test.

Undercooked chicken. Hide the toilet paper

>first date
>gf
Really putting the cart before the horse anon

>>17337714
Summer
Pesto pasta with pesto made from scratch with 1/5 of a clove of garlic.

Garden salad with simple vinaigrette.

A bottle of Riesling, mid tier price.

Winter
Pan fried white fish with a lemon caper parsley pan sauce.

Roast potato wedges

Steamed vegetables

Bottle of Chardonnay

>>17337714
I live in Chad, women are illegal here

>>17338525
This, but you have to get the moisture level just right.

>>17338250
Surf and Turf for me.
The lady will have a salad.

>>17337714
All women love pasta

japenese pancake. okonomiyaki

>>17337714
i have never had a girlfriend, but there aren't any good restaurants around here anyways. i am a good chef and if she really wants to go out for that shitty finnish mickey dee's knock off instead of my cooking then she wont be a good gf.

>>17337714
Beef stew or reverse sear steak

>>17337858
If a woman doesn't like good food you should dump her. I dated a nice girl earlier this year but she only ate peanut butter sandwiches and ice cream. I tried taking her to a few restaurants and she wouldn't eat anything, it was really embarrassing. Women are children and do need to be forced to eat new foods at times but this girl was on another level of mental illness. At first I thought that was just an insignificant thing but the more I thought about it the more I hated her. Eventually I had to dump her.

>>17337714
The most important thing is this. Do not try out some new recipe or technique. Do a recipe you can nail every time. Even if it is just a simple quiche with a side salad, If you can execute it perfectly it is more impressive than a sad looking steak, pizza etc.

>>17337714
>that pic
I’m so fucking lonely bros

>>17338305
Nothing. The bitch can starve, why the fuck should I pay for some roastie to annoy me with her boring, bland, narcissistic life, that I have no interest in? I swear, my stories are always about epic adventures or surviving natural disasters, and women have the worst, most boring stories. They're only marginally less annoying than fags.

>>17337787
Brilliant. Except the masturbation part. I'm on nofap, so I have found after 4 weeks of abstinence, just how little I need porn.

>>17337737
Lol

>>17339358
How to tell a girl you're a lolicon weeb. I am too but I hide it

>>17337757
>I've never had a physical interaction with a woman
did you come out of your dad or something?

She's trans btw if that matters.

>going out to dinner on the first date
Why do americans do it?

>>17337714
Paella de marisco (with chicken bits ;^)) if you're willing to put in the effort, and by that mean practice the recipe until you master it, the rice must be "al dente" , no liquid, heavy shellfish taste, nice yellow color on the rice, etc.

>>17338646

I have been on only one date in my entire life. I'm 30. It was underwhelming.

>>17340035
>he has to actively do no fap
Nigga, get on my level. I have no libido to speak of and I don't know when I masturbated the last time

>>17340035
>>17340316
I'm on day 2 of nofap (lulz) and you have no idea how hard the pr0nz are calling me

Filet mignon, Kraft shapes mac and cheese(trust me), and roast some sort of vegetable on the side like Brussel sprouts. Have her make the Mac and cheese with you in the kitchen and i guarantee she’ll hop on your dick raw. Works every time. I say use Kraft shapes because women are children and they think it’s fun and cute

>>17337714
>girlfriend
>first date
She’s not your girlfriend yet retard.

>>17340582
this nigga might be up to something

>>17337727
This is /ck/ where the poster average age is way older than the containment boards you come from

>>17340722
This is a good point. What percent of /ck/ do you reckon are oldfags?

>>17340745
Honestly a % is too hard to give. When I started browsing Snacks was still a mod. We've had the hackers on steroid, gamergate, 2016 Trumptard invasion and some /tv/ seeping into the board slowly but steadily. Still I'd say we are definitely older. It's a slow board so kids get bored quick anyway.

>>17337714
>What is a good meal to make for your first date with your gf?
split pea soup, trust me she'll love it

>>17337714
>First date
>She's already your gf
Did you buy her ? How much ? What country is this ? Do they welcome foreigners ?

>>17340337
If it's any consolation, it gets exponentially easier. All you have to do, is close your eyes, breathe deeply for a bit and you're good to go. Worked for me every time. Also, try not to fantasize.

>>17341105
haven't even opened a pron tab yet, I can dodis, I won't even fap on my bed cause even my imagination is fucked from a life of super perverted pr0n consumption

>>17340745
I found this site when I was 16 on 2008.

>>17340263
SI HACES LA PUTA PAELLA DE MARISCO NO LLEVA POLLO JODER PUTOS GUIRIS

>>17341133
grim

>>17341125
Yes anon, you can do this. I believe in you. Never forget, PMO achieved absolutely nothing but guilt. A few tips include
1. Never sleep with electronic devices within reach
2. Always take cold showers, really smashes through dirty thoughts
3. Don't start/edge. If you do, it isn't possible to stop. Remember, it's more about staying away from porn than not masturbating, though that's also a part of it. It's a mind game, but to your advantage, it's all in the mind. Nothing real, so strong mind, and you can conquer it.
4. Biggest enemy: boredom. Never allow boredom to take you.

>op mentions being in a relationship
>thread turns into r9k shit
every time

>>17341159
HAHAHAHA puto nazi de mierda, lleva pollo si me sale de los huevos maricona, yo me la hago como me sale de la polla

>>17341180
good tips, thx pham you're truly a brutha

>>17341186
POR MI PUEDES SEGUIR COMIENDO MIERDA SUBNORMAL

>>17341233
>t.

>>t.

>>17341269
>>17341307
Sad!

>>17340582
I almost instinctively know that this works. Wish I'd have the opportunity to try.

>>17337737
KEK

>>17337714
the first time I cook for a girl, I always make shrimp pasta with a pesto cream sauce. I would use scallops for a better meal, but they're expensive

>>17337731
Came here to say this. A putanesca or a midnight pasta with a side of fish is an easy way to wow a special lady. Pair it with an italian wine and you're golden

>>17340745
>15 years of this hellhole and still an eternal newfag
/ck/ is an interesting mix of zoomers and burnt out old timers. You can tell that boards like /diy/ are mostly functional adults too.
>>17337714
Pasta is the easiest option to show some level of basic competence in the kitchen without fucking up catastrophically due to nerves. The sauce can be as complicated as you care to make, and still look reasonably impressive to a normie without breaking the bank if they weren't worth your time.

>>17337714
Penis pot pie.

>>17337714
>first date
>girlfriend

>>17339877
You're not alone

>>17340582
You and charcuterie bro are the only one that know what up

>>17337714

why dont you ask her what kind of food she likes and then make that

>>17338961
>wine
I never touch that stuff

deviled eggs appetizer; hot dogs and beans main course; hardcore anal sex for dessert, if you know what i'm saying.

>>17345086
virgin take
she's having 32 boiled eggs and that's that.
Pour Moi, a simple dish of confit duck, grilled aubergine and goat's cheese salad, with sourdough croute

Learn to make spaghetti carbonara. Cook it for her at your home. Make sure your parents know to stay in their room to give you both done privacy. My parents make me bring them home a pizza beforehand. But then me and my lady friend have total privacy and she gobbles more than just my carbonara, lol

alcohol fruits and cheese

What should I cook for my gf in order to prevent this from happening to her?

>>17337772
No asparagus for a first date. Tastes great until the golden shower.

>>17347367
portion control is far more important than diet

>>17337714
just something ethnic, it doesnt have to be amazing, along as it's a 7. It can be asian, western or whatever the fuck you want. As long as it's just a tad above mediocre

>>17339826
They probably give you those ones because you're a craphead

>>17338252
This guy's right. You dont make a charcutier board on a first date.

I made a steak mid-rare with pasta, and had pesto I made previously. She asked how she could help. That was cute.

A charcutier board? Pussy. If you want to display your obsession with pinterest, that might be a good idea.

>>17349210
I'm not attractive to women at all

>>17347367
she looks way better on the right

>>17337714
Depends on what the woman likes. For my wife I did surf and turf. Nice steak, lobster, simple salad, drinks

>>17337731
Winner. so ez

>>17337714
for you: baked beans and pork with onions. girls love flatulence.

>>17350939
Based architect.

>>17339877
>>17343344
i am here to check you, brothers
we can be alone together

>>17340337
i'm on day 4, and i keep popping up some Cassi ASMR from time to time just to remember what i'm doing this for. i can't even leave this board.
i'd recommend the same thing anon. don't stray from this board. there's titties around every corner out there.

>>17340582
>Have her make the Mac and cheese with you in the kitchen and i guarantee she’ll hop on your dick raw.
Is it because the sound Mac and cheese makes?

>>17347367
Mostly fresh vegetables and fish. Keep grains and sugars to a minimum. Use real butter and olive oil. Avoid margarine and seed oil. Also feed her lots of avocados and coconuts.

>>17337714
Good question, I have a date with a cute transgirl I met at work and I plan on railing her tight ass repeatedly.
Are anal prep foods different to normal foods?

>>17354254
Yeah don't give him anything with a lot of fiber in it.

>>17354269
She identifies as female.
Wouldn't fibre be better for cleaning out her colon pre coitus?

>>17354277
Yeah go ahead and make 3 bean soup and then he'll involuntarily evacuate his bowels all over your cock.

>>17354279
That actually sounds pretty hot.
I'm quite into scat, I wonder if she'd consider shitting in my mouth.

>>17354288
I'd bang a tranny too but I draw the line at getting shit on

>>17354293
I think I find it hot because it's the final forbidden fruit, something that her body has processed just for my sexual pleasure.

>>17354304
b-based?

>>17337757
>>17337784
How about men, Nancy boys?

>>17338262
Get a load of this retard

Order MacDonalds before she arrives. When she asks what you're making, announce (loudly)
>For me, it's the McChicken

The rest of the night should proceed smoothly