/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>17243577
I've never been to one but that doesn't look like asian food at all

>buffets

fried shrimp
fried chicken
potstickers
simple as

>>17243577
Those fries look more limp than my grandfather's dick

>>17243577
Beeg
Fried rice
Crab legs
Shitty sushi

>>17243584
>>17243597
these niggas get it

all kinds of meat
imagine being retarded enough to eat carbs at a buffet

>>17243589
>Those fries look more limp than my grandfather's dick
Wha...What the fuck anon...

>>17243604
What about an entire plate of egg rolls or crab ragoons or dumplings with no care for the other patrons needs or desires?

anything that looks like this
also egg rawls

>>17243577
shimps, crab, steam mussels, chickenwings, eggrolls, dimsum meatballs
i can eat 3 plates of those items. then I settle into the regular chinese menu (2 plates) avoiding rice and the high starch fillers. the one we go to has maki sushi also..

>>17243611
I eat at a buffet to enjoy it, not be a faggot and min max prices. Of course I'm getting some rice with my meat.

>>17243770
especially at these cheap asian joints where price doesn't even matter. just eat what ever the fuck you want.

Crab rangoons motherfucker.
There’d better be sufficient rangoons on that buffet table.

rangoons just a big fuckin plate of rangoons, an unreasonable amount of rangoons.

>>17243802
this dude knows whats up.

Onion buns when it's the bun festival menu, otherwise spring roll, General Tso sauce (without the chicken) on the spring roll, a couple of teriyaki meatballs, black pepper steak, mixed vegetables, some of the cheese cauliflower if they have it, fried rice, and a perogy. Chili sauce on everything.
Second plate is a little bit more pepper steak (more sauce and green pepper than actual steak), veggies, and a few california rolls. No dessert.

>>17243579
The popular one around here (which is not that cheap, but still kind of shitty) has perogies, fries, roast beef and pizza for people who are so whitebread they can't handle American Chinese food.

>>17243577
lo mein, crab rangoon, chicken and broc, mac and cheese, sushi, those big sugar chinese donuts

I will straight up eat the FUK out of that fake crab with the layer of cheese broiled on top.
And yeah, I’m the motherfucker that will grab some, and scrape off a bunch of the extra cheese layer and add it to my crab. You won’t do shit.

>>17243611
you have fat ad poor hands.

>>17243770
this.

>>17243577
>You're at one of those cheap shitty asian buffets.
No. No I am not.
I refuse to go to buffets anymore.

>>17244727
Sorry, faggot.
You entered this thread despite OP’s warning.
Your faggot ass is now in a cheap Asian buffet whether your faggot ass likes it or not.

>>17243577
Crab rangoon, egg rolls, skewered teriyaki chicken, and some General Tso's Chicken.

>mac and cheese
>fried chicken
>brown gravy
>repeat 5x

>>17243943
KINO. I've eaten myself into a salt induced stupor as a child on that plenty of times

>have local Chinese buffet
>typical American-Chinese-buffet setup (owners/servers are a Chinese family, kitchen staff are Mexican)
>one server is their oldest daughter
>always looks angry
>always wears a tank top
>always has noticeable coarse black hair under her arms
I go back just to see it.
Multiple tables of buffet goodies and the only thing there I truly want to taste are those armpits.

Fuck a plate I’m walking back with the entire tray, and it there’s any room left some shitty sushi

>>17243577
>hi i'm doing market research
>i want to find out what the most popular buffet items are
>just spoonfeed me your answers pls
no fuck off
not doing your research for you.
go to a buffet in person for a week and take notes on what people take.

>>17245184
>retarded ass zoomie shizo faggot thinks a fucking Chinese buffet needs market research
Can you please kill yourself?

>>17243577
Jalapeno chicken. Egg roll

>chinese chicken nuggets
>fried rice
>pizza

>>17243577
First, I like to hit the buffet line:
Egglol
Big heap Kalbi beef
Wings
Hot sour soup
Almond chicken no rice

Then, the mongol BBQ station:
Pork, green onions, cabbage, mushrooms, garlic into the bowl
Tell em to do it up extra extra extra hot
Side of rice

Ipa to wash it all back

Now that's some good eating right there champ

>3-4 teriyaki "chicken" on a stick
>2 Chinese "donuts"
>Massive pile of every flavor of chicken they have. Especially bourbon if they got it.

I'm not big on sea food.

>>17243577
Probably jello

>>17243579
A lot of Asian buffets usually have american dishes.

>>17244753
So i did(see gif)

>>17243577
E-coli

>>17243577
beef&brocolli, chow mien, dumplings/gyoza, ginger beef, special fried rice, spring roll

>>17243577
Grab all the robster craws before the fatties from some tourist bus get to them.

>>17246268
I suspect that a cheap shitty asian buffet will not have "house special fried rice"

I've never been to a buffet that the public has direct access to since I've read some horror stories about homeless people going into them with a water bottle full of piss and they pour it into the buffet dishes.

>>17246282
most do.. its just left overs off the line chopped up and added to the day old rice from the sushi buffet.. I worked on cruise lines for years and thats how we made a lot of the asian and Mediterranean dishes. leftover dinner items, supplied all the stations menus for breakfast and lunches. we staggered them so it wasnt obvious.

>>17246296
what city?

>>17243577
1st plate: General Tso' or similar chicken, steamed rice, green beans , crab Rangoon.
2nd plate: lo main noodles, mystery meat on stick, fried sugary donut thing, crispy shrimp
3rd plate: crayfish
Desert: chocolate or banana pudding

>>17244727
Why not, anon? I hear the bat soup is breathtaking

>>17243577
Man I miss the precovid buffet experience. And it sucks because you didn't even realize it was an experience but now it's gone and we'll never get it back. Just one more big generational shift

>>17243577
Crab legs
Crab legs
Crab claws
Crab legs
Stuffed shrimp
Chocolate pudding
Crab legs
Crab legs
Crab claws
And some lumpiya if they've got any.

>>17243577
Probably orange chicken, mongolian beef, any other bite sized thing that's fried, egg rolls, and greasy noodles.
But fuck buffets I hate it when my friends want to drag me into one.

>>17243589
do they taste better than that though?

>>17243630
>breading and sugar
ngmi
your goal is to make them lose money on you. multi plates of high-ticket items, ideally purely meats, is essentially the only way to do this without just throwing food away or being rolled out of the building.

>>17246736
I'd rather just eat whatever I feel I'll enjoy the most instead of treating a meal like a contest to win.

load up on chicken w/ broccoli. get some dumplings and a chicken teriyaki on a stick while im at it. and get vegetable fried rice. prob 2 plates of that. then ill finish with a little bowl of strawberries and bananas and maybe one of those chinese donuts.

has anyones chinese restaurant buffet opened back up yet? mines been takeout only since covid started. when your order off a menu, the quality of the food is way better yeah but you all you can eat at the buffet for the price of one item off the menu tho so it kinda sucks. its nor unusual for the familys order of chinese to be 60 dollars

giant plate of brownies then leave

>>17243577
i get some egg drop soup with the chinese fritos, an egg roll and some cheese potato skins. i then go to the hibachi station and order a stir fry noodle plate with a ton of shrimp on it.

after that i start grabbing random foods

>>17246912
>has anyones chinese restaurant buffet opened back up yet?

we had one that converted to takeout, reconverted to buffet/takeout and then they mysteriously died out.

another buffet reopened nearby but the food there became horrendous quality. felt like you were eating food from yesterday. that restraunt is still going strong, but i won't go there again.

Cici's pizza nearby me shut down shortly after covid19 first happened and never reopened. it's annoying because i have to drive further to eat one of those places. For a long time cici's wouldn't let you serve yourself pizza. you would have to tell them what pizza you wanted and they put it on the plate for you.

besides all that, there's a extremely busy chinese buffet in my city that never closed. all they did was require patrons to use new clear gloves each time they get a plate of food. and the rule is enforced. fuck them though because one time I noticed they were blocking a fire exit with chairs and tables, so I notified the local fire department in the area and the captain went out there and probably gave them a fine.

>>17243802
>>17243844
did someone say rangoons

>>17243577
Rice.

>>17243577
Lo mein or chow mein
Fried chicken wings
Mussels or whatever other odd seafood thing
Crab rangoons
Spring rolls
Sweet and sour sauce

>>17246912
>has anyones chinese restaurant buffet opened back up yet?

Mine never closed, I love tennessee

>>17243614
You ever seen that video of the lady yelling "Bill? Bill? BILL? BILL?" I was in a similar situation.

If you want to get as much out of it as possible, have some desert first then wait 10 minutes. The sugar will make you much more hungry due to releasing a hormone called grehlin which just acts to make you hungry. Then you can stuff your face with all the expensive food.

>>17243577
>>17243577
My dad always goes for the squid and always gets dhiarrea
If anything one has to admire his determination

>Early 2ks
>Go to disney world hotel buffet
>See chocolate cake
>It's covered in gnats

>>17246736
Why would you go to a restaurant with a goal other than to eat what you'd like to eat? Who gives a shit if the place loses money on me? The important thing is I get my money's worth, on things I want.
What kind of meal is "pure meat"?
>>17243802
I don't like crab rangoon, but when I'm high they're really fun to eat. Shit's crazy.

>>17243577
Any combination of
Chow mein and/or fried rice
egg roll
orange chicken
Wings
Kungpao

For the second plate I try to get something different.

>>17243577
>What's on your first plate?
Fried rice, if they already fucked up that one, you know the rest will be barely edible and just start ordering beers instead.

>>17247636
>I don't like crab rangoon
you in the wrong neighborhood, boy.

>>17246613
>it's gone
I dunno where you live, but buffets have been open and operating normally since last year where i live

>>17246613
Man that sucks, bro.
In my city they had to adjust for a while.. during which most of them went to takeout-only, and a few remained open as “buffets” but you had to point at what you want and staff would put it on a plate for you cafeteria-style.
But they’re back to normal now. Hopefully wherever you live will eventually let them do that too.

>>17243577
Shrimp and crab legs. I want to get all the shelling done before I start eating.

>all those crab leg people ITT
Do you guys have like a secret technique or something?
The little snow crab legs I always see on buffers just don’t seem worth the effort to get to the meat.

>chicken with the most crunch
>lo mein
>beef n broccoli
Yummy in my tummy

ameridogs be like yeah lets eat sinovietnamese tonight uuuhhh yeah i will get a burger mate extra bbq sauce please and a happy meal to take home

I get a fuck ton of crab legs and don't even eat them. I just like wasting the chinese money. I make sire to put as much food on my plate and only take 2 bites of everything then get more.

>>17243577
>pick the salmon and shrimp from the maki
>leave the rice

honey chicken, generals chicken, fried rice, 4 egg rolls

chow mein, sesame chicken, spring rolls

The fucking mussels if they have them. What do they do to them? It's like a thick rich mayo sauce right? I have to learn to perfect it at home, but even then the buffet near me has massive 4+ inch mussels
I can't compete

>>17243577
>sweet sour ribs
>fried rice
>6 x egg rolls
>drenched in plum sauce

>>17244937
you gotta use the salt from the armpit sweat

basil chicken, fried rice, chicken wings, beef and broccoli

>>17243577
All of the crab legs

>>17243577
A large pile of fried seaweed on a bed of prawn crackers.
I eat 5 plates of this.

All the shit from the hobachi bat and I eat it cold and rawppnmp

>>17243577
Pretty much just string beans and fried rice. Maybe a couple of those sugar donuts.

>>17243577
pizza
chicken nuggets
that fried bread with the powdered sugar

repeat as nauseum until kicked out

>tfw the local chinese buffet took away the crab legs

is it even worth it it?

>>17247365
>>17246974
probably one of the largest and best chink buffets around here is now permanently closed. its probably impossible to go from a buffet with hundreds of ppl to only take out orders

>>17243577
honey walnut shrimp
slice of pizza

>>17246334
nyc

>>17243577
my first plate is always a bowl of wonton soup (with extra scallions and fried noodles). if the broth is good i will go back for a second bowl.

>>17246946
>

I want some of those multi colored shrimp crackers with hot mustard sauce that I never see anymore.

Anybody else embarrassed but can't resist at least loading up one slice of pizza when at the asian buffet? It's like the buffet equivalent of the walk of shame.

>>17250052
WTF kind of asian buffet has pizza?
I've never seen that before.

>>17250052
Never touched the pizza.
But I do occasionally get a slice of garlic bread and use it to soak up the sauces of whatever else is on my plate.

Is asian buffet pizza like that sbarro shit that looks like it been under a heat lamp for six hours?

>>17243577
‘Goons, mein, drop, rice, and Tso’s. Soy sauce all liberally and a cold Pessi

>free carafe of very drinkable merlot
>kino gin & Tonics
>order of oysters rockefeller
Head to buffet
>chicken chow mein w/fried noodles & tons of duck sauce
>fried dumplings
>wonton soup
>soft shell crabs
>beef & broccoli
>pork & mushrooms
>order a dry martini
>fuck w/ staff because we tip well and its our goto bar
>round two starts w/ bacon wrapped scallops
>dates smothered w/ peanut butter & sugar
>chicken satay w/ peanut sauce
Usually finish up w/ some bread pudding, thats ordered cuz it's full of rum & whats obviously breyers french vanilla ice cream. Then I spend another few hours drinking hard seltzers w/ whatever comfort girls are hovering around.

maybe some chow mein
pepperd beef and some fried shrimp
oh and the crab not the king crab though i like the smaller crabs cooked in spices

>>17243943
Nah kid I’d say something then you’d apologize and be awkward as fuck. Guarantee you won’t be coming back for more the rest of the night faggot weakling

>>17243577
I always eat a ton of pot stickers/ gyoza, I like them and you usually only get a few at take out places

>>17250099
most of them. some of them are high end bars that have full menus full of food you wouldn't expect. something like a brazilian steakhouse but w/ chinesey foods.
the one I went too, -->>17250231, was 47 a head but you got unlimited wine and one cocktail. kids were less but infrequent

>>17244937
wife her, sounds ideal

>>17243577
God i miss these places like you wouldnt believe. Canada doesnt have them anymore since our economy is in the trash.

>>17243577
The entire tray of crab rangoon.

>>17250581
You are a man of fine taste.

>>17243577
crawfish
crab legs
Shrimp
the other shrimp
the mussels

>>17250052
I was surprised when I learned it was usually pretty good. After that, I have no hangups about it, as I have absolutely no shame.

>>17243577
chicken on a stick

>>17243577
jews.
Deep-fried jews.

>>17243577
slice of pizza, mac and cheese, and chicken tendies

sweet and sour chicken is heavenly. pretty much I will fill the plate with just that. which I think is probably really rude thing to do. I think I'll just try to do it at home (even though I'm a terrible cook)

I had a friend who would only eat sushi from crappy chinese buffets. Was pretty based, he'd take entire rolls for himself.

Me, I'm a crab rangoon and chicken skewers guy

Fried Dumplings
a few cream cheese wontons
Shrimp and lobster sauce
bok choy
this imitation crab + cheese dish
a baked clam that's just fish-flavored breading
cup of wonton soup

I pick out each little shrimp out of the seafood mix

Short ribs

Pick out all the beef from the beef and broccoli

Cheesy Krab

Krab Wontons

Pick off salmon from sushi on top or if a roll pick off rice and eat mix with fork.

>>17243943
Holy fuck yes CHEESEKRAB

>>17252206
If you like that, try making it with lump crab meat and a dash of old bay.

>>17243577
I like the idea of buffets, but only nice ones. I don't care if it's all you can eat when everything looks like the OP image; I'm not paying $20 to stuff my face with a bunch of bland, reheated/frozen shit. Like, just look at that picture. It all looks bad, and the fact that I can eat as much bad food as I want doesn't make it any less bad.

I thought i was beating the system by loading up on pork belly last time I went though, joke was on me though because all that fat had me sickeningly full before I could finish my first plate

>>17252228
>not cutting it off

>>17252215
Then it would be KRAB anymore.
That’s part of the charm.

I read a reddit post from a buffet worker where they had a woman eating an inhuman amount of crabs legs and the owner was tossing up whether to pay her to leave or something. Turns out she was eating crabs legs until completely full, going to the bathroom and forcing herself to vomit it all up, rinse and repeat for hours. Pretty based

>>17252241
It's better though. I don't mind surumi and the fish it's made of, but when its real crab it's better. Like Crab Rangoons are better than Krab Rangoons.

>>17252285
That's good practice though. If you don't use the vomitorium at least once, you didn't get a good deal.

I got your goonies right here with some springies and what looks to be egg drop soup.

I tend to go for the combo soup myself, combination egg drop / wonton.

>go to buffet

Eat only spagetti and mac snd cheeze.

>>17252287
Yeah but I’d need legmeat to replicate the CHEESEKRAB, and it would require huge leg meat, and be prohibitively expensive to make a significant quantity.

>>17252306
Could just make a crab dip then.

>>17252320
Bro, that’s not even close to cheesekrab.

I cheesekrabed your moms last night!

for dessert i load up on the coffee cake

>>17252342
I like the tiramirsu myself but don't trust cheap asian joints to do it right so it keep it simple like green tea ice cream.

>>17243577
I'll go for the things that I am least likely to make/try at home. I don't worry so much about getting my money's worth as I do about trying something new.

>>17252293
>vomitorium
that's not what that word means

>>17252356
No, it is.

>>17252356
That's what the trolly dolly places are for on Saturday and Sunday mornings, there's usually something that most people haven't seen or heard of before and its inexpensive complete with that bingo card billing.

>>17243577
small amount of each type/variety of meat dish so I can decide what I want more of or what to avoid on the second trip.

>>17244937
Do men really like armpit hair?

>>17243770
Never gonna make it

>>17252537
Only patrician men.

We also like prepubescent girls. Little 70lb oriental portable onaholes.

>>17243577
PB chicken
Sesame chicken
Lo mein
Couple crab rangoon

>>17252537
Depends on the girl.
If you're ugly and fat being hairy will make you more disgusting.
If you're hot it will increase the hotness.

>>17243770
This. Just enjoy yourself and eat like a respectable human being.

If you see body hair around pubes/pits it means you are too late.

>>17244937
hyuck

>>17252797
Gawrrrsh!

>>17243761
>mussels
This is the only thing I've done multiple solo plates of from buffets, Asian or otherwise. Fucking love mussels, but they're too expensive to order a la carte at most places and kinda pain in the ass to prepare at home despite not being that expensive. The actual cooking is easy enough but removing all the residual beards and then disposal of the shells dissuades me from preparing my own. Last buffet I had them at was at the Sam's Town in Vegas, went through 3 plates.

>buffet near me went from $13 to $19
bros...

>>17253172
Tell me about it. Lunch was 6.29 two years ago now its almost 8.

Fuck I can’t resist any more.
I’m headed to my local big ass buffet to load up on rangoons and cheesekrab.

>>17253194
Put some semen in the coconut chicken for me.

>>17253172
>your local buffets still being open
fuck you the one near me is only doing takeout now, no dine at whatsoever.

and what's the point of getting their shitty food if it's not all you can eat. Besides if I have a hankering for cheesekrab, sesame seed balls, and rangoons of course.

>>17243577
Meat.
Fuck the fillers and vegetables.
They spend most of their money on meat and I'm getting my monies worth by gorging on meat.

One of the worst pukes I ever had was from a cheap Chinese buffet.
I have an iron stomach I've eaten expired food and usually get a nice loose shit but never puke.
Went in everything in the main buffet was lame usual fodder. They had a "sushi" it looked dry and I dodged it.
They had peking duck tho.
After a few bites felt like I was dying.

>>17243577
Eight pounds of orange chicken, and one egg roll

>>17253503
When I go into a buffet it's because the last night I got drunk as child fuck. It's then I want a big variety to get my nuitrition back. It helps that I already kinda want to throw up when I get there so it's easy to eat a bunch, vomit and repeat till the hangover recedes.

>>17250016
I hate yankees SO FUCKING MUCH

>>17248048
These "people" see a $12 buffet as a contest to maximize their money's worth instead of a way to eat a wide variety of (kind of shitty) American Chinese food. I highly doubt there is any thought beyond: crab is expensive, get all crab, in their minds.

>>17253521
Based pedo always thinking about fucking kids even while bloatmaxxing at the buffet.

>>17252782
No respectable human would go to one of those. I need to go visit my local one this week.

>>17253609
You know it. MAPs represent!

I usually don't touch the buffet, maybe I'll take some sweet and spicy pork/chicken tendies. Otherwise you'll find me queued up at the Mongolian BBQ counter.

>>17253647
There’s literally no cheesekrab or rangoons at the mongoloid BBQ counter, bruh.

>>17253656
I don't know what any of those words mean

>>17252767
my guy
best taste

deep fried whatever, dumplings and Vietnamese spring rolls (spring rolls are there just to so I can tell myself I ate vegetable)

>>17243577
Crab meat

>>17243577
one of everything, including the overcooked to fuck squid, chocolate pudding, and tiny little ice cream cups

>>17243577
Shitty sushi, beef and broccoli, macaroni and cheese, fruit

Four trips up, each time bringing back nothing but bowls of bananas floating in that strawberry sauce.

>>17243943
If you did that when I was standing there I'd ask you firmly to put the cheese back. If you refused or mouthed off, I'd knock your fucking teeth down your throat, take your plate, and eat the krab while you writhed in pain like the pathetic weakling you are.

>>17243577
Ginger beef, sweet and sour pork, mixed vegetables.

Maybe an eggroll / sprinroll or two.

>>17243577
>crab rangoon
>chicken teriyaki skewers
>cheese stuffed mushrooms
>stuffed shrimp
>lo mein
>some kind of spicy beef
>egg drop soup

Mongolian bbq, butter mussels, baked oysters in black bean sauce

Why did I enter this thread while I’m on a fast?

Half the plate is Lo Mein with extra shrimp and imitation crab
Crab Rangoons
Egg Rolls
Mushrooms

FUCK I LOVE FAKE CRAB MEAT.

>>17244937
fuck I wish I had a domineering hairy arm pitted Chinese wife. One day our half yellow son will take over the buffet business

>>17243597
>Shitty sushi
kek

>>17250016
Of course you live in a shithole city.

>>17255415
Jokes on you, bitch.
If you tried that shit, I’d lick the cheese on my plate, toss it back in the buffet tray, mix it up, and say “all yours”.

>>17243577
Just load me up on the fake macaroni and fried chicken tenders.

>>17246736
pleb who grew up poor mindset. trying to min max at a fucking shitty chinese buffet. some people are just not meant to make it in life

>>17243577
Looks like a Cooking with Jack Show recipe.

Is it worth it to travel from Canada to a red state to go to a buffet.

>>17257858
Fuck no. Unless you're paying $40 a person at a Brazilian steakhouse it'll just be cheap slop (which I'm sure you can find regardless of location).