/ck/ - Food & Cooking

look mang, I appreciate the recipe and all, and it sure was fun trying something so absolutely retarded and then posting pictures of it
it brought out this wonderful level of butthurt & unbridled autism in everyone gathered here and I, for one, take great amusement in this

it must be just thrilling for you to see your very own coffee recipe prepared by some anonymous fag on seekay
but at some point you’re gonna have to realize that we’re just making fun of you

>>16789243
Just having the usual for me tonight. How about everyone else?

keurig chads where we at

>>16789251
Here's my iced coffee recipe, I hope you guys make it and then tell me what you think:
Ingredients:
>nguyen vietnamese coffe (or preferred coffee. No phin is needed, you can just get the beans. Cheaper coffees require no cold brew hot bloom and can be directly cold brewed).
RATIO: ONE CUP COFFEE-4 CUPS WATER
>Star anise (~2 pods/1 teaspoon),
>Vanilla extract,
>Cloves (2-4 cloves to taste; you can always add more at the end but you can't take away!),
>Cinnamon (about 1/2 to 1 stick, or, 1/4 to 1/2 teaspoon ground),
>Ginger (4 teaspoons),
>Nutmeg (1 teaspoon. Remember that nutmeg is sweet and you're adding sweetened milk, this recipe makes 4 servings!) to taste,
>no cups coconut cream, which does not emulsify and I need to do some experimentation. My current thoughts are on gellan gum F, but for the time being, this can be made with only:
>1/2 cup sweetened condensed milk (total, so 1/8 cup or 2 tablespoons per drink),

Cold brew, hot bloom your coffee: pour about 1.5 cups of hot water over the grounds, shove your spices and vanilla in while it's still hot, allow to bloom for 30 seconds, then pour over the rest of your water. Let steep in the fridge or at room temp--covered, obviously--overnight. Let those flavors get to know eachother and mingle. You can add your 1/2 cup S.C. milk now, or 1/8 cup each, per drink, when you are serving it. I prefer now.

Take that bitch out, filter it through a fine meshed sieve. Drink it.

>>16789324
Should I care? Keep making fun of me, meme me. Eventually it'll be good and then I'll have a great recipe attached to my name spreading around.

>>16789324
looks promising enough

>>16781991

>Coffee Time General /ctg/
it's 9:45pm you animals

>>16789342
>here’s my take on it:
>the smell is a little medicinal, but the taste grows on me
>the coffee is not at fault, and neither are the spices; it’s a refreshing flavour and all coffee is extremely mild and delicate when it is extracted cold
>my problem is (and I had a feeling this was going to happen) that the coconut cream is very fatty and doesn’t emulsify into the drink
you’re left with little blobs of coconut cream that give a terrible mouthfeel…I mean look at the congealed scum on the ice cubes there
>if coconut is integral to this drink, I would omit the canned stuff completely and grate fresh coconut into the mix that steeps
>either way…I like trying new things,
>I thought the other threads were funny,
>and I appreciate trying your recipe thx

>>16789342
>here’s my take on it:
>the smell is a little medicinal, but the taste grows on me
>the coffee is not at fault, and neither are the spices; it’s a refreshing flavour and all coffee is extremely mild and delicate when it is extracted cold
>my problem is (and I had a feeling this was going to happen) that the coconut cream is very fatty and doesn’t emulsify into the drink
>you’re left with little blobs of coconut cream that give a terrible mouthfeel…I mean look at the congealed scum on the ice cubes there
>if coconut is integral to this drink, I would omit the canned stuff completely and grate fresh coconut into the mix that steeps
>either way…I like trying new things,
>I thought the other threads were funny,
>and I appreciate trying your recipe thx

>>16789350
>at some point you’re gonna have to realize that we’re just making fun of you

>>16789357
>I think you need to triple the scm, double the coconut cream and add in as much gellan gum F with sodium citrate as possible. That'll surely prove to everyone you're not a mouthbreathing tard.

>>16789361
Make sure you're roasting the chicory in lard as well. Essential step.

>>16789368
Why would you add chicory to a coffee that already is darkly roasted vietnamese style? Plus they already use butter.

>>16789382
I thought we established we're cutting cafe du monde from the recipe.

>Some manufacturers roasted chicory with two pounds of lard for every “hundredthweight,” or cwt, of chicory "to give the chicory a better face.”

>>16789397
>I thought we established we're cutting cafe du monde from the recipe.
I thought we established 4 times that I was using cafe du mond for easy access to more bitter coffee. You could also add chicory to a lighter brew if you wanted to. Cooking is about using your head. The recipe even said "or whatever coffee you prefer."

>>16789397
Apparently they roast in lard in phnom penh https://www.phnomenon.com/index.php/cambodian-food/drinks/roasting-coffee-phnom-penh-style/

>>16789404
> I've admitted being wrong to the OP of this thread and agreed to take on your suggestion for a coffee--which flat out, I can tell you is going to be better
So roast some chicory in lard and add it in. The recipe clearly calls for
>nguyen vietnamese coffe
which contains no chicory. Chicory imitates the bitterness in Vietnamese coffee beans, so with a more modern nguyen roast you've gotta add it in.

>>16789428
>which contains no chicory.
But it doesn't need it, because it's already the darker vietnamese roast. Use your head.
>Chicory imitates the bitterness in Vietnamese coffee beans, so with a more modern nguyen roast you've gotta add it in.
No, that would be a bitterness overload. Use your head.

>>16789428
sounds like a nguyen nguyen situation to me

>>16789431
NO YOU HAVE TO USE CHICORY NYUGEN IS FOR WESTERNERS YOU'LL THROW OFF THE BALANCE.
>Cooking is about using your head
So you agree using something like a super light nordic roast isn't going to go well with the recipe right? Using
>whatever coffee you prefer
is going to provide an incredibly wide variance on the original recipe. Use your head. When you're following the recipe for a wellington, you're not just going to sub in boston butt on a whim.
>>16789440
gotem

>>16789457
>NO YOU HAVE TO USE CHICORY NYUGEN IS FOR WESTERNERS YOU'LL THROW OFF THE BALANCE.
I think you're a retard but if you prefer chicory, go for it. It's your choice.
>So you agree using something like a super light nordic roast isn't going to go well with the recipe right? Using
For me, but that's the base recipe. You can modify it if you want.
>is going to provide an incredibly wide variance on the original recipe.
It's your choice really. I use nyugen, you use chicory nyugen, it's all good in the hood
>When you're following the recipe for a wellington, you're not just going to sub in boston butt on a whim.
I might sub in another cut of meat though, experiment. It doesn't have to be a loin

>>16789431
>Why would you add chicory to a coffee that already is darkly roasted vietnamese style?
>It's your choice really. I use nyugen
https://nguyencoffeesupply.com/blogs/news/faqs-vietnamese-coffee-roast-levels
Looks like they're all medium roast. Better get that chicory and lard out.
>Chicory imitates the bitterness in Vietnamese coffee beans, so with a more modern nguyen roast you've gotta add it in.
You can't just skip steps in so good you'll cum yourself coldbrew.

>>16789492
>Looks like they're all medium roast. Better get that chicory and lard out.
Hmm, alright! I guess it might work, I'll have to see how much chicory you need and what amount of lard:butter.
>You can't just skip steps in so good you'll cum yourself coldbrew.
Apparently not. I will make you need thick wool boxers to absorb all cum from drinking my coldbrew by christmas.

bros I keep my beans (5lb bag of raven's brew) in the freezer, grind them, then use a french press. anyway to upgrade my coffee game with easy changes that aren't autistic?

>>16789511
stop storing your beans in the freezer it dries them out and makes them taste bad

>>16789501
For the record, the
>base recipe
is cold brew. If we're modifying the recipe how we please, 7 ingredients are coming off that list.

>>16789243
Indonesian beans from Java; not my usual, giving it a go.
Plunger
Condensed milk? In my place, it's use for dessert and whatever is left sits in the fridge until forever...

>>16789562
the best recipes that call for sweetened condensed milk use an entire can with nothing left over

shits got no place in coffee

posting my shitty cappuccino again
just glad i got the milk frothed correclty on the first try
ended up being delicious

espresso made with a 9barista, milk frothed with a nanofoamer

>>16789581
>shits got no place in coffee
cmon now you'd never trust a skinny chef right? Why would you trust a skinny barista?

>>16789582
responded on the other thread but this is a good start, good foam control. looks like the crema is too thick when you're pouring, this means the milk can't push through it which is why your design is narrow. Try giving the coffee a good swirl before you pour to smooth out all of those lumps.

Help me decide which coffee to make today:
1. Pineapple fruit bomb Ethiopia
2. Squash + pumpkin seeds Yemen
3. Bright, citrusy Kenya

>>16790227
don't put syrups in good coffee, retard

>>16790227
How actually is Yemeni coffee? As crazy as people say or overrated?
Can't go past an African coffee with tropical fruit personally, cash fucking money. Is it a natural?

>>16789243
>how do you take it?
black
>how long does a can of milk last in your house?
this house doesn't use milk

>>16790308
I decided to make the Ethiopian. Yes, it's a natural. It was my second favorite one from 2020. I had been saving it for when I finally got a nicer grinder. I still intend to give a detailed review of my 1zpresso k-plus after I use it a little longer. It's really nice so far though.

Ok, so when I had started getting into coffee 20ish years ago I found Yemeni coffee, and it was fucking nice. Only recently have I been able to find it again. Tiny beans, natural process, often has this really wild and combo of dried fruit (apricot, date, raisin, fruit leather) with chocolate and some unusual savory flavors like squash, pumpkin, toasted pumpkin seed, tobacco, and aged steak fat (serious). The nearby natural Ethiopians on the other hand tend to be more berry and tropical fruit and chocolate, but the savory rustic flavors seem more like flaws in them to me, like medicinal herby or woody. So I guess if it sounds up your alley it isn't overrated just because of its uniqueness. It's very expensive though. I'm not sure that $10/lb green is justified, but neither is gesha or island coffees. You get some rare flavors like florals and prices seem to skyrocket. The deeper I go down the coffee rabbit hole, the less I know about coffee.

>>16789253
thanks elliot

Which one do I get bros? The ethiopian is a micro-lot and really expensive.

>>16791279
The Ethiopian. How expensive is it?

>>16791279
Easy rider, but that's just cause it has more fall flavor notes.
>>16790399
The pumpkin and tobacco notes sound nice. I had a pour over a couple months ago that had notes I'd fig, brown sugar, and tobacco. Shit was good.
>>16789582
Ah, your the nano frother anon. How is it? I'm using a double headed milk frother which works decent enough. You enjoying the 9barista? Does it BTFO the humble moka pot?
>>16789324
Sounds interesting, but I'd replace the star anise with cardamon. Aniseed ive found to be too bitter and doesn't go well with coffee. Cardamon on the other hand is fucking great; a little goes a long way. Rose water and cardamon is a good combination to.
>>16789243
I haven't posted in a while, and I've been using my moka pot more. I'm making my basic bitch pumpkin spice cappuccino. If you want the recipe for my sweetened spiced pumpkin puree let me know.

Oh and the coffee is alright for a cheapish robusta, but it has a cheap acidic bit to it. I think the Italian version was better.

>>16791506
I'm being lazy and carefully microwaving 4oz of 2% milk with some cinnamon maple added.

>>16791513
And its done. Not too sweet and spiced right. It's a little foamy than I'd like though.

Latte art bros...

>>16791506
>Cardamom replacing the anise
Okay, I can see how that'd work

>>16791279
Why the fuck you drinking coffee that tastes like mango pineapple nectarine you massive flaming fucking faggot?

>>16791279
Easy rider. Reasons
>Based movie
>Costa Rica is based and underrated
>Ethiopia is the Funko pop of coffee origins

>>16790305
you're so retarded it hurts

>>16791334
15€ for 200g, the easy rider is 10€ for 250g.

>>16791506
>>16791624
I'm leaning towards it as well, I've had my share of fruity coffee even if this one looks pretty good.

>>16791572
If I wanted to drink ash to placate my fragile masculinity I'd drink instant.

>>16791506
the nanofrother is pretty based, no issues getting high quality foam from it yet
9barista absolutely btfo's anything other than a $1500+ espresso machine

>>16791687
>15€ for 200g
Absolute state of turd wave roasters and Ethiopian coffee drinkers (aka redditors)

>>16791777
Maybe if you ask your parents for christmas they'll kick you $20. I know money is tight.

>Maybe if you ask your parents for christmas they'll kick you $20. I know money is tight.

>>16792068

Would you buy an older Rok machine with the new bellows for 50$?

gimi

Irish breakfast tea with some milk and sugar

yeah that's right I came to the coffee thread to talk about my cup of tea. what of it?

>>16792860
If its the old acetal brew chamber its going to crack.

>Hario V60
>Hario Switch
>Kalita Wave
>Clever Dripper
>Origami
>anything else

which of these do you recommend? I know Switch is an immersion brewer, how good or bad of a job does it do as a pour over? Multiple answers are fine. I have a French press and Chemex already but I don't really like using them daily just because of cleaning.

>>16793598
I prefer my origami to my v60.

>>16793598
Switch as a pourover is literally just a V60 so it does exactly the same

Been using this lil nigga to make me some coffee, I like to add a bit of coconut cream to oat milk before frothing to make a nice macchiato

>>16793242
no, it's been replaced with the new black one

>>16793730
Snag it but understand its said to be the worst of the 3 cheap manuals (robot,flair) when it comes to thermal stability. At $50 i'd treat it as disposable and pick it up to fuck with. Who knows if you'll be able to flip it for a few bucks profit eventually when you want a different machine.

>>16789581
>>16789589
Some recipes unfortunately ask for proportions that are fractions of a can/container/packet
https://youtu.be/j70yTq2ysLQ?t=44

>>16791551
It's getting better.

>>16794031
They come in resealable tubes now...Coppercow packages individual servings with their drip bags. Stop using foodtubers as justification for your actions.

>but but but kenji says

Just had another 9 cup shot out of this little nigger

>>16794202
Start tallying your output. You need to make ~100 drinks for the price you paid to be negligible. Post some drip shots aushomie.

>>16794202
>9 cup shot
?

>>16794289
Already made about 10 in a week only paid 200usd

>>16794086
Thanks for this anon, I've been wasting these cans of sweetened condensed milk after using them in my coffee.

>>16794202
>9 cup
>shot
you should be shot

>>16794202
why not just use a moka pot for 10% of the price and get better coffee retard

>>16794202
>$200 moka pot
No thanks, fag.

>>16789582
Based fellow 9Barista and Nanofoamer chad. I accidently went too fine on the grind last week. A loud pop and the safety valve engaged - no harm done

>>16791506
There are now two 9Barista/Nano Foamer users here

>>16795707
very based post, friend
good to hear i'm not the only one here with this setup
gonna try my hand at a cortado a bit later today

>>16795713
I don't care for latte art at all - I just let the milk pour as it comes out. Post cortado when you make it.

>>16789253
I like them tbqh but too expensive

>>16789343
>it's 9:45pm
>00:46:04
West Coaster thinking that his timezone is the definitive time zone
Somewhere in the world it's coffee time

>>16789343
>calif*rnian
you are less than an animal

>>16794525
Oh right 200usd~300aud. I should remember this, I just put in a big order with pullman this summer.
>>16795711
Someone last ctg was asking about it. I told him to keep an eye out for og9baranon. Hopefully he checks back in.
>>16795462
netimepal
>>16789253
Back in the based days of fake couponthreads, these were the only ones I could consistently get stores to accept. That and a "free" sandwich from subway with a fake investor relations card. Subway isn't even publically traded...

>>16795926
I've just seen the anon asking about the 9Barista - he got a few replies from other anons. 8 months later and I'm still very happy with it.

>>16789343
Based
>>16795767
It actually is, all the most important clocks in the world are set to pacific time.

>>16796420
There's a coordinated universal time moron. Those clocks set to pst are an offset from utc.

>>16796420
literally all important non-UTC clocks are set to EST lmfao
where do you think the most important stock exchange in the world is, retard

>>16795926
>>16796237
i'm the cappuccino 9bar anon from last thread
i got mine about 6 months ago and it's been a joy so far, it's only getting better with time
boutta pull a cortadito in a few mins

>>16796777
Absolutely based. What grinder do you have?

>>16796803
option-o remi
fantastic little hand grinder, makes for great espresso

>>16795759
>>16796777
>>16796803
i call it "the swan" or "i can't fucking pour latte art"

>>16796777
Figured you'd pop back up. God isn't that breville mini knockbox the cutest little thing. I like that scoop too. Reminds me of my Ishii Koji.

I think I'm going to replace the sweetened condensed milk with evaporated milk that's been slightly thickened using arabic gum. Thoughts? If I'm making this for the average person than it's probably better that they choose the level of sugar.

>>16796819
Seems like a neat grinder.
>>16796876
Not too bad tbqh

>>16796879
i have been working to optimize the hygge in my workflow
it's going wonderfully so far -- pulling espresso brings me such joy

>>16796886

>>16796890
I think you're actually pushing espresso basedpusher.

>>16796914
Thank you anon, very obsessed. I'm still going to be working on it, but I appreciate the reminder that I have room to grow! I love you, anon. and I hope to share something truly special with you by thanksgiving.

>>16796921
damn didn't think about it like that

>>16796914
what an amazing time these past few threads have been

>>16796941
Don't worry, they're gonna get even better. I've got some exciting things planned for the next month and a half as I experiment with every single thing and eventually reach perfection, while anon screeches so hard you'll want to try my new recipe.

>>16796435
>>16796757
>They don't know
Sorry, but the US west coast is currently the center of the world. UTC and EST are offset from from PST. Look up who runs the clocks. You might not like it but that's how it is.
t. Former EST chad

>>16796957
>The current version of UTC is defined by International Telecommunication Union Recommendation (ITU-R TF.460-6), Standard-frequency and time-signal emissions, and is based on International Atomic Time (TAI) with leap seconds added at irregular intervals to compensate for the accumulated difference between TAI and time measured by Earth's rotation. Leap seconds are inserted as necessary to keep UTC within 0.9 second of the UT1 variant of universal time.
>>16796941
You'd think seeing his carefully theorycrafted recipe poured down the drain would be a wakeup call.

>>16796973
Thanks for posting the definition of UTC, but in practice they calculate PST and add 8 hours.

>>16796993
>International Atomic Time (TAI) is an international time scale that is computed by taking the weighted average of more than 300 atomic clocks. These clocks are located at more than 60 timing laboratories around the world. The most stable clocks receive the most weight in the calculation, but the maximum weight assigned to any clock is limited to A / N, where A = 2.5 and N is the number of clocks. Thus, if N = 300, the maximum weight is 0.83 %. While the stability of TAI is achieved by this weighted average, the accuracy of TAI is derived from data from primary frequency standards, which are clocks built at several national metrology institutes. TAI is computed by the International Bureau of Weights and Measures (BIPM) located near Paris, France.

>Coordinated Universal Time (UTC) is based on TAI, but it is adjusted by leap seconds to account for the difference between the definition of the second and the rotation of Earth. This correction keeps UTC in conjunction with the apparent position of the Sun and the stars, and it is the standard used for all general timekeeping applications.

Your entire life is dictated by the french.

>>16796993
idk if you're trying to be funny but you're just reminding me of the unfunny try-hard "comedian" in my friend group
it's embarrassing -- just stop

>>16796973
>You'd think seeing his carefully theorycrafted recipe poured down the drain would be a wakeup call.
Why would I give up anon? Are you so weak that you quit at the first hurdle? Not me!

>>16797014
>French labs run critical timing infrastructure
Yeah, no they just tell them when to add the leap seconds.
>>16797130
Not trying to be funny, actually dead serious, but I'm glad I reminded you of a friend anyway.

>>16797130
Remind you of anyone else?
>>16797137
You should have 20 variations on a recipe before posting it. You came up with some shit on the spot, claimed it was so good you'll cum yourself, now it was just a hurdle after it gets dumped. Are you so weak you'll question your tastebuds and completely change a recipe, just because someone said it tasted like a hangover?
>“So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.”

>>16797175
>You should have 20 variations on a recipe before posting i
I did have a bunch of variations
>You came up with some shit on the spot
Keep theoryposting anon. The fact that you can't just say "The recipe is shit" is very telling that you want to absolutely destroy me, but the fact that I don't give up and stay cherry pisses you off.
>claimed it was so good you'll cum yourself
I got attention and another datapoint, didn't I? :3
>now it was just a hurdle after it gets dumped
Well, yeah. It was a hurdle, because I'm not going to stop until it's actually so good you'll cum.
>Are you so weak you'll question your tastebuds and completely change a recipe, just because someone said it tasted like a hangover?
Are you so stubborn you won't consider every data point, and so selfish as to not try to make adjustments to your recipe, so more people enjoy it? What a shame. I'm going to continue refining my recipe until you can't deny it's good.
>“So we beat on, boats against the current, borne back ceaselessly into the past.”
But we're not stuck in the past, we're moving forward with the current. You should join us with the latest info anon, I was thinking about subbing the sweetened condensed milk to evaporated milk; I realize what I enjoy most about it was the texture of the milk.

>>16797198
>The fact that you can't just say "The recipe is shit"
That is nearly verbatim my first reply 2 ctgs ago. You immediately started crying which caused more people to start in on you, try started trying to correct the shit recipe to comfort the bruised ego. This new attitude you have towards endlessly refining a shit recipe for 4chan clout is all cope.
>it must be just thrilling for you to see your very own coffee recipe prepared by some anonymous fag on seekay but at some point you’re gonna have to realize that we’re just making fun of you

I put a nice bit of salted butter in my espresso this morning. I believe I have ascended to the next plane

>>16797251
You should try salted sweetened condensed milk next.

>>16797241
>That is nearly verbatim my first reply 2 ctgs ago.
You didn't even try it though, you're mad that I didn't stop and go away because you told me to. That's why we're still here 2 threads later, and I'm going to be here for 2 more months making coffee with you. :)
>You immediately started crying which caused more people to start in on you,
You were samefagging bro, and you basically admitted to it.
>try started trying to correct the shit recipe to comfort the bruised ego.
No sir, I'm improving the recipe so more people can enjoy it. See, you bitch about everything because it's not about the recipe. No matter what answer I give you, you always give more excuses. That's okay, anon, we all have our obsessions. You're not going to stop me from doing this, I need you to understand that.
>I think you're just scared that I'll make something good and you'll have to eat your words
>This new attitude you have towards endlessly refining a shit recipe for 4chan clout is all cope.
Here's the thing bro: I don't care about clout. If I did, I would have conformed. You've being the best advertisement for this recipe by bitching endlessly, and giving it publicity. You're giving me incentive to continue. Isn't having a positive attitude great?
>it must be just thrilling for you to see your very own coffee recipe prepared by some anonymous fag on seekay but at some point you’re gonna have to realize that we’re just making fun of you
Like I said, please keep making fun of me. I realize you're doing it, but unlike you, I don't care about people hating me. I want you to keep doing it, tucker yourself out.
>>16797259
Try evaporated milk, it's less sweet!

>>16797267
>You were samefagging bro, and you basically admitted to it.
Again, just crafting your own narrative. Show me where I admitted to it?
> I would have conformed.
Every change you consider is a concession. If you're not here in two threads making the og recipe, it was shit and you admit to it. See how binding 4chan litigation works?

>>16797288
>Again, just crafting your own narrative. Show me where I admitted to it?
Sure thing.
>>16776587
>>16776575
>Admitting to trolling and shitting up the threads
I didn't even need to get that one out of you. You get into a lot of fights, anon. You should take some pills for that.
>Every change you consider is a concession.
No it isn't. I ignored half of your advice, I'm keeping the chicory, I'm keeping the coconut milk, I'm keeping the condensed milk, I'm keeping the cold brew hot bloom, and I'm keeping most of the spices. That's not really much of a consession.
>Are you such a child that you feel the need to win random conversations with strangers?
>If you're not here in two threads making the og recipe, it was shit and you admit to it
I do not consent to your terms, therefore, they are invalid. See how kabbalah works?
>See how binding 4chan litigation works?
Yeah not at all. Lmao. When you did not consent to the contract, you consented to others not consenting to yours.

>>16797310
Admittedly fucking with bozos like you isn't even close to admitting to samefagging to win an arguement buddy. Try again. No 4chanx proof this time? If the recipe wasn't shit and you had confidence in your palate, you wouldn't alter a thing. You see how changing the coffee in iced coffee changes the recipe? Shepard's pie with beef isn't Shepard's pie anymore.

>>16797339
>Admittedly fucking with bozos like you isn't even close to admitting to samefagging to win an arguement buddy
>Bozos
Ooooooo I was waiting for that one! He only says that when it's mad.
>Buddy
It's that extra white levels of anger. Ask me how I know you're 12:00PM type dark?
>"Hurr admits to trolling for years but I couldn't possibly samefag hurrdurr"
Opinion: disregarded

>>16797347
>>Its not me samefagging and obsessing, we just both have the same greasemonkey script and monitor it for new posters whenever I'm getting questioned
Its about time for your friend to show up isn't it?

>>16797158
>Not trying to be funny, actually dead serious
incredibly embarrassing

>>16797175
you seriously have a mental illness

>>16797347
Oh man he used two innocuous non threatening words he must be heated.

>>16797198
you have a serious mental illness

>>16797267
>You were samefagging bro, an
not him -- you sound like the most insufferable faggot in existence and your passive aggression is incredibly womanly in the worst possible way

>>16797388
For you.

>>16797386
>Its about time for your friend to show up isn't it?
I have a friend? Horray. Who is he?
>>16797424
He only says bozo when he's mad.
>>16797443
>you sound like the most insufferable faggot in existence and your passive aggression is incredibly womanly in the worst possible way
I'm sorry you feel that way. Don't worry, you'll get over it

>>16797347
>Ask me how I know you're 12:00PM type dark?
unbelievable mental illness

>>16797545
Unbelievable cope
>>16797425
No thank you

> you don't feel like yourself without drinking 2 liters of coffee
I think I'm an addict

>>16797524
Another wild claim with no proof. Really lending credence to the whole
>you like to craft scenarios where you aren't the faggot
plotline. Shouldn't you be scribbling down little factoids to incorporate into your brew? You've got an entire recipe to change.

>>16797603
are you heckin addicterino'd? you should get a shirt that says don't talk to me without my 2L of heckin coffee.

>>16797682
>Another wild claim with no proof. Really lending credence to the whole
You've said bucko several times, only when obviously mad. Sounds like you're the faggot, friend.
>Shouldn't you be scribbling down little factoids to incorporate into your brew? You've got an entire recipe to change.
How have I changed the entire recipe?

>>16797688
>bucko
>ctrl-f bucko 1 result.
>ctrl-f bozo
>1 of 4 matches. 3 are you sperging out over me using it once
Again, another wild claim with no proof. Completely fagricated scenario.

>>16797704
>3 of them are me quoting you
>go back to >>16762871
>You said bozo several times
Stay mad, bozo
>Again, another wild claim with no proof.
I just provided it
>Completely fagricated scenario.
I like how you sputter nonsense like a rabid dog repeatedly for days on end until you realize nobody cares, and then you spout more random nonsense on repeat. Are you autistic? It would explain the obsession.

>>16797725
Again, zero proof its me.
>Are you autistic?
Here's you diagnosing yourself on monday and apologizing for not being able to distinguish separate posters.
>Listen, I'm autistic face blind retard. I've forgotten my own name 4 times. Sorry.

i wish the FBI would nuke this god-forsaken website.

is there any reason to not make turkish coffee? Literally the easiest way to make coffee. You get the most caffeine, it's not bitter, and it's simple as shit with virtually no equipment.

Am I the only one who prefers cheap ground coffee from a drip coffee maker?

>>16797744
>Again, zero proof its me.
That's nice dear, you're the only one who says bozo.
>Here's you diagnosing yourself on monday
I got diagnosed by a doctor.
>and apologizing for not being able to distinguish separate posters.
That's your defense that you're not a samefag? Pretty weak dude-whos-been-trolling-here-for-two-years

>>16797865
A clinically diagnosed autist trying to call others out for being autistic. Classic projection. You can't make that shit up. I called you out hours before this for confusing posts. I felt that neurodivergent wall you kept slamming your forehead into. No wonder you're fixated on shitty coldbrew and samefagging off your phone.

>tea thread: comfy
>coffee thread: this shit

Just got a Rok GC, grinder is yet to come but for now want to pick up a local blend to start familiarizing myself with the technique. Should I just pick a boring dark blend to practice with so I don't feel bad dumping shots?

>>16797904
these niggas have been seething for a couple days straight. you retards both lose, please fucking stop

>>16797909
Its a big heat sink so yeah, learning on darker beans probably isn't the worst idea. I've heard people preheat the ENTIRE machine, so you may want to start thinking about how you can do that easily. You'll probably also appreciate a real tamper.
>>16797904
Imagine going into /tea/ and posting you've got some so good you'll cum yourself green tea and its lipton bags soaked overnight.

>>16797933
It came with a few real tampers, a bottomless portafilter and a scale. I've looked into it quite a bit and never seen anyone preheat the whole thing though lmao.

The only problem I have is the basket which is loose in the bottomless portafilter. I've looked it up and people say to stamp 3 bumps into it but I'm hesitant. Any advice? I preferably don't want to buy another basket

>>16797933
All this over some cafe du monde? lmao

>>16798109
Nah all this over some fucking attitude over cafe du monde. Turns out he's a projecting autist samefag , just like I predicted a few days ago
>>16798035
>The only problem I have is the basket which is loose in the bottomless portafilter. I've looked it up and people say to stamp 3 bumps into it but I'm hesitant. Any advice? I preferably don't want to buy another basket
You can't slip a spring into the pf?
https://espressounplugged.com/products/portafilter-spring
And yeah that looks fine in terms of ergonomics. I was just making sure you weren't using like a little finger tamper(one comes with the new flair, first thing I replaced) to run through a bunch of shots right off the bat. It would be a shame for a $50 rok to fuk your wrists. RSI is no joke.

>>16798145
>>16798145
>>16798145
>Nah all this over some fucking attitude over cafe du monde. Turns out he's a projecting autist samefag , just like I predicted a few days ago
>don't like faggot's attitude
>i know i'll act like an even bigger faggot for a week
you're both fucktards and you can kill yourselves

>>16798145
was really shocked at how heavy it is, it's almost a pound and half. espresso is so much fun, I love how tactile everything is. I moved the spring to the bottomless one, the only thing is that the spouted one is all kinds of fucked up. how can it even get this bad? I don't mind because It was cheap and I'll only ever use the bottomless one but it's fucked lmao theres like holes and shit

>>16798265
Concentrated coffee is acidic and generally stock "accessories" at that pricepoint are shitty. Just means whatever potmetal foundry in china rok(or whoevers brand is stamped on there) hired cheaped out. Previous owner wasn't rinsing it all the way.

>>16789253
>95g of sugar

>>16798341
do you use a scale? if so, would you mind explaining your workflow? trying to tie down a basic routine to then tighten up, I've come to learn manual espresso is a bit of a dance. thinking out loud here
>kettle to 100c
>warm bottomless pf
>spouted pf in
>rinse 3x hot water
>dry bottomless pf
>measure beans/grind and tamp in
>bottomless pf in
>place glass and scale
>tare the glass and start timer
>15s preinfusion
>30s shot time
>clean up

>>16798456
I've got a flair 58 now. I haven't touched a rok since like 2013. Here's what a little googling turned up.

>I boil a large amount of water in my capresso kettle, and then, with the portafilter inserted into the rok and a mug under the portafilter, i fill the resevoir up with boiling water and raise the arms slightly to let the water drain through into the mug below. after i've done that, i fill my dosing shot glass up with boiling water and let that sit until i'm ready to pull my shot. finally, i take the portafilter out, fill the portafilter up with boiling water, let the water drain through, and then dry the portafilter before grinding into it and tamping. Hope this helps!

>>16798576
i meant with your flair, are you webm anon?

>>16798586
Yep. I turn on the flair, let it preheat for a few minutes, pull the portafilter, set it on top of my kettle to steam the basket(this is only to ensure my first shot is hot enough, I could also just run some boiling water through the machine). I weigh and grind while my kettle boils, wipe the basket, dose, wdt, pullman chisel then tamp and put a screen on top. Its either a ~28s 1:2+ or a 15s 1:2+. Normalizing at a 17g dose for now in a pullman 17/19 basket. Sometimes I'll fuck with the decent 10g basket.

Whats the deal with those OCD tamper things

I love coffee and this thread makes me want to have all the fag coffee you guys make and then hug and kiss you as thanks but it really makes me jittery and anxious sometimes

I wish I could just enjoy coffee without it making me feel like shit

>>16798722
Specialty decaf has gotten really good these days, you should check out some local roasters near you.

>>16798674
They spread the coffee laterally to give you a level tamping bed. Ideally you're not "tamping" with too much downforce while you spread the grounds out, thats why the depth is adjustable.

>>16798727
can there be good decaf espresso? eyeing this decaf colombian

>>16798727
Yeah but presumably you guys all have caffeinated so i cant try yours and give you a long hug and headpats as thanks

>>16798894
You can't have a sip of coffee?

>>16798905
I could but that wouldnt be satisfying, id want a full 4 oz cup

>>16798945
You should get really good at single cup pourovers.

>>16795926
Yeah it was 140 pounds from bellman but 280 aud ree
>>16794353
Well that's what the instructions say
>>16795628
Formerly shoot
>>16795697
>>16795695
I had a moka pot wasn't a fan

>>16797933
>Imagine going into /tea/ and posting you've got some so good you'll cum yourself green tea and its lipton bags soaked overnight.

hey kitchenanon, if you see this you shoukld do exactly this for great justice

>>16799629
First thing you're going to do is warm up some water. 12 seconds in the microwave should do. We're going for a warm bloom cold brew. Next you're going to want to toast some uncle ben's brown rice. Most people would use a skillet, but we're using old chef mike for this. Another 30 seconds for the toast will get that rice nice and fragrant. Next you're going to combine the rice and green lipton bags with 12oz of coooooooooold water. I promise in the morning you'll have so good you'll cum yourself iced riced hojicha.

I love Vietnamese iced coffee. I'm so glad I live in a city with a ton of them
I do feel bad though because I'm pretty sure it's mostly cream and sugar

I want to learn how to do espresso, what should I buy as a cheap entry into espresso? I already have an electronic coffee grinder, do I need to get a higher-end one for espresso?

>>16800712
What grinder? If you're willing to deal with a pressurized portafilter(lets you get away with a cheap grinder) and potentially upgrade later, go with a flair neo.

>>16800718
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B076FJ92M4/ref=cm_sw_em_r_mt_dp_8EGJ9N3JD761SKKG1VD7
This one, 25 dollar Meuller electronic grinder

I need advice anons. I saw a store nearby selling Jura coffee makers (jura ean8 caught my eye). Thing is i know jack shit about coffee, at home i can only make instant or turkish.
Will that stuff make me better coffee? What other stuff should i watch out for?

>>16800726
Yeah you'll definitely need a much better grinder for nonpressurized portafilters. They designed that neo specifically for preground and blade grinders so you should be good. When you feel like dropping money on new grinder, just grab a standard portafilter from them and you're pulling real espresso.

>>16800733
I don't know anything about that brand in particular, but the thing with any sort of automated brewing process, is that you want to obtain a good level of consistency in brewing.
It may somehow do something fancier than just pour hot water at the right temperature over coffee grounds, but you're going to want to learn about basics of coffee brewing at a minimum before splurging on a fancy box. If anything, you probably wouldn't get an amazing return on the results compared to a significantly cheaper machine.
I've just been using a Bunn auto brewer for well over a decade($100USD). Does the job just fine. If I feel like having more control, I'll just use a chemex or french press.

>>16800759
What does automated mean here, it makes coffe on it’s own? How is french press different from it or from espresso machine?

>>16800779
When I say automated, I mean Drip Machines. You put the water and grinds in, and it does the rest.

What would make for a good orangutan themed drink? I've convinced the coffee house I'm working for into doing a fundraiser for the BOSF. Sumatran beans are really the only mandatory part. Coconut milk and syrup and banana syrup are a good start, but I think it'd be boring for it to just be "latte but with these two less than complimentary flavors and a milk alternative pumped in", but it needs to be simple enough that it doesn't hold up our orders.
Name suggestions are appreciated to. I like Pongo Protection Java.

>>16800794
Juras are automated. Drip machines are a hot plate with an on/off switch. You dump a bag of beans into a jura, press a button, and it makes you like 1 of 30 preprogrammed recipes. Pretty sure most of them use ceramic burrs though.

>>16800851
Convenience for only 2000 dollars. What a deal.

>>16800822
Honestly, you'd probably do just fine with what you're suggesting. Most people willing to buy coffee for a fundraiser are going to want to think its 'tasty', and not necessarily a miraculous marriage of the finer flavors in coffee.
Hard to be snobbish over a monkey charity drink, I'd think.

>>16800851
I see, thanks. Is ceramic burr a bad thing? And another stupid question, does espresso only make espresso

>>16800882
Sure I'm not recommending it. But its a bit more than a hotplate plugged into ac mains.
>>16800889
Ceramic burrs are cheaper than milled stainless steel. Here's a little espresso cheatsheet I just ripped off google.

>>16800907
I'm not even knocking it. If you have throw-away cash and are interested, then why not.
I'm just used to being a cheap-ass and using a drip machine and baratza.

>>16800907
>>16800935
Okay, what would you recommend for a good espresso? Up to around €1k euros, so nothing super fancy? If i can spend less for good quality and sameish effort i’d be down for that.

>>16789440

>>16800935
The age old advice is to control as many variables as possible. Grind, temp, time, for pourovers and french press agitation. Juras eliminate all of that for convenience. I could see it working in an office setting where when it breaks you immediately get it serviced, but there are much better ways to blow 2k on a coffee bar. Just tossing out a random combo, you could pick up a df64, a breville dual boiler, and a pourover cone for about the same price. Don't even need the cone if you're just going to make sprovers.

>>16800958
Just watch coffeegays videos and do a little local research. EU market is supposedly GREAT for used espresso machines.

https://youtu.be/7HIGdYy5of4
https://youtu.be/e0kQ5WqjcU8

>>16800907
A good number of these coffee names are wrong.

>>16800822
For naming you could do any amount of alliteration that works with the theming of the organization.
> Sanctuary Sumatra
> BSOF Blend

It'd maybe be a good idea too, to get some custom sleeves made for the coffee cups if your business would be willing, and have the Orangutang or BOSF logo on it.
People get interested in visual stuff like that, so if you had people sitting at tables with the images, or just had a 'model cup' sitting up at the counter for customers to notice, it'd likely generate more sales.

>>16801014
Yeah I had an apology typed out for ripping random shit off google thats wrong 99% of the time. Ended up scrapping it because I really don't care. I wasn't going to link the coffeegay video but I just did with the espresso machine vids so fuck it. I figured an infographic would quickly illustrate the concept of espresso being both a drink and a base.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=93waR1jzoLA
>>16800822
>>16801017
Banana latte, get some gme or rocket stickers to put on the cups. The orangutans will thank you.

>>16800995
Thanks. I found some La pavoni lever machines for 700-800 euros, would they be a better choice? They sure are more affordable

>>16801181
I think they have a shitty workflow, but once you get around that they'll absolutely produce great espresso. You have to be careful refilling them while hot since its literally just a pressurized boiler on the back with a top valve you unscrew. The exterior gets hot enough to burn you and thus "leaks" alot of heat so they're not the most thermally stable without a heatsink on the grouphead (+~80euro).
Just do a little research and keep your eye out. From what I've noticed people who sperg out and NEED to buy an espresso machine rarely use them, so just take your time and figure out what you're actually going to use. What grinder are you planning on using?

>>16801224
Thanks. I have no idea on the grinder yet, coffee making is not something i really did and all this is new to me. I like a good cup or few during the day, but at home i’m limited to instant or turkish which i don’t really enjoy. So i decided to try and get better coffee at home. I didn’t want to go nespresso and get locked in but i have very little knowledge on the good place to start.

I'm mainly a tea drinker but I want to get into coffee somewhat. My only issue is I want coffee I can drink black and not add a bunch of calories and mixers to. I'm fine paying a premium for good coffee, but I don't know what to look for or how to prepare it in a way that's ideal for straight drinking without turning too acrid and sour.
With tea, you have to watch the temperature and brewing time. Are there similar kind of brewing parameters for high-end coffee?

>>16801288
The good news is once you're past the grinder hurdle, you'll be able to make ALL your coffee better. From lazy morning french presses to grinding fresh beans for turkish when you feel like it.
>>16801321
>With tea, you have to watch the temperature and brewing time. Are there similar kind of brewing parameters for high-end coffee?
Absolutely. Knowing your water temp, brew time, grind weight and liquid weight will give you repeatable refinable cups. Check out drinktrade. They've got a little survey and direct you towards popular coffee roasters based on that. Once you start figuring out what you like, just order straight from the roaster.

>>16796876
9bar anon again
made a cortadito today
fucked up the initial pour so i just got a blob instead of a monk's head
gotta pour faster so foam doesnt come out in the initial pour

>>16801495
this tastes absolutely delicious btw
i almost feel bad having made this myself, feels like i should have gotten this from a cafe or restaurant with how good it tastes

>>16801495
Based atomic bomb test art. Makes me want to heat up the flair.

>>16801181
avoid la pavoni
they're more trouble than they're worth, and a lever machine like that would make a very daunting first espresso machine
if you want a lever machine, get the flair 58

>>16801586
>atomic bomb test art
thanks for the laugh, friend
this is just the mental image i needed

heat up the flair and pull a shot and post it

>>16800907
>cappuccino
>chocolate
whoever make that image should be flogged

>>16801605
Okay, what about some semi auto machine?
And would remi hand grinder be decent?

>>16801634
This guy has a remi and loves it.
>>16801495

>>16801634
i have the REMI -- it might be the best hand grinder out there for espresso, can't recommend it enough

as far as machines, i would say get a nice semi-auto machine to start with, for example:
>gaggia classic pro (with some simple mods)
>breville infuser
or, if you can stretch your budget a bit more, something like
>rocket appartamento
>breville dual boiler
either of those last two will last you for years and years and years to come, unless you start becoming really autistic about espresso (which takes time to happen anyways)

the alternative would be to get a much cheaper manual machine, since they are usually capable of making espresso comparable to semi-auto machines 3 or 4 times their price, at the expense of a more inconvenient workflow.
recommendations there include:
>9barista (i have this, it's amazing -- makes espresso as good as or better than a rocket appartamento)
>flair 58
>robot

that should be enough to get you started. i'm the 9bar anon from here >>16801495

>>16801617
You're not wrong on the flogging, but the original cappuccino was coffee, topped with whipped cream and chocolate. If you stumble across a better infographic post it up. I just grabbed the first image that was high enough res for the text to be legible.
>>16801610
Heating up now.

>>16801672
Neat, thanks!
Gaggia looks available here, breville and rocket not so much, looks like i will be going with some gaggia model.

Why do people pretend like drinking coffee black is somehow superior or even a viable alternative to drinking it without milk?

Black coffee tastes like shit, it's the milk that helps create a fuller flavour profile for the coffee.

What electric kettle should I get for an aeropress? I use a plain stove kettle for now but an electric sounds nice to be able to turn it on in the morning, shower, and come back to hot water.

>>16801732
also consider the rancilio silvia

>>16801711

Why do people pretend like drinking coffee with milk is somehow superior or even a viable alternative to drinking it black?

White coffee tastes like shit, it's the origin characteristics that helps create a fuller flavour profile for the coffee.

>>16801753
Thanks. Saved. This is the random shit that should probably be in the ctg pastebin when I get around to writing it.
>>16801746
Bong detected. Get back to flooding earl grey with milk and watering down curry.

>>16789243
Who else here /cowboy/ egg coffee?

>>16801610
Had to take care of some shit outside. I'll try to get the sep graph in the background next time. I'm still bugged by the f58 "sagging" a bit as pressure ramps up, which makes the shots run slightly out of center. Flair says its fine and the puck bottoms look good so theres no massive channeling or uneven extraction. I think I'm either going to have to find a thin mat to slip under the front of the frame to mitigate it a bit, or sand down the back of the maple butcher block I got for a new bar.

>>16801968
yeah i've seen people brace the front of the flair with a bit of whatever to level it out during extraction, so the group and pf will stay level with the countertop

>>16802009
Wasn't a problem at all on my old signature, but the more shallow wider 58mm basket and the longer arm on the f58 give you a bit more muscle to work with. The shots are tasty though. I was watching the recording phone, not the graph so this isn't really "profiled".

>>16801968
This is so out of focus. I could have filmed this way better

>>16802039
very cool man
been really tempted to get some sort of a lever machine to make profiled shots -- the biggest downside of the 9barista for me is the lack of control during extraction

>>16802040
Front facing phone camera propped up on a tea pf with poor lighting. Do you really think ctg deserves any better? Jk I'll work on it. 3mb file size sucks dick. inb4 clean your bar
>>16802061
I'm convinced levers are just magic. I don't even set a baseline "godshot" profile, I just use the data to adjust grind from shot to shot.

>>16801751
microwaving water in a cup has the same performance as any kettle for an aeropress. Anon, look away from your computer screen for a minute and ask yourself, do you really need to consume in this situation?

>>16801746
cringe tastelet

Rest in piece greencoffeecoop. George is shutting down after 17 years. 40lbs left of the ethiopian and 60 of the indonesian highland natty.

>>16800907
legit retard chart

>>16802421
Unironically a better recipe than the cum yourself coldbrew.

>>16802439
really low bar bro, that shit looked fucking atrocious

>>16803103
Obviously those ratios are all fucked but I'd drink a 60ml espresso with an oz of vanilla ice cream. Whip is probably a little unnecessary but a little dollop on top with some coco rouge might work.

What's the difference between the flair neo and the flair classic?

>>16803271
Neo is pressurized(so you can use preground or a shitty grinder), comes with no case, but is upgradable to the classic portafilter(and possibly pro2, not sure) and gauge whenever you feel like it.
Classic is a bottomless portafilter so you need a good enough grinder to generate adequate pressure. Upgradable with a gauge or the pro2 brew head.

Be as cool as Brad Pitt
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xFijeOXI6PM
Ahahah
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Nvlh8Bh-QQA
Hehe

coof tpa0s

I'm a simple man. Black cold brew or a shot of espresso.

>>16804056
>cold brew

>>16804057
I did say I was a simple man.

>>16804059
jap ice coffee is more simple

>>16804069
I like jap ice coffee over regular iced coffee but I still prefer cold brew (assuming it's well-made, bad cold brew sucks worse than mid tier iced coffee)

>>16789582
I use the bellman steamer. Texture is good.

>>16804117
how long does that thing take to get up to temp/pressure? seems like a huge pain in the ass to use

I have a keurig. I don't have a regular coffee maker atm.

I bought an official reusable k cup for your own ground coffee and it keeps tasting acidic, but the coffee I'm using for that is also a year or two old. The disposable k cups taste better than the ground self serves.

Is there a certain brand or type of coffee that would be best to use for my own k cup? Or am I doing something else wrong?

>>16789243
Condensed milk tastes like milk that is on the verge of maybe thinking about possibly considering going bad.

>>16804608
how often do you wash it? or are you just dumping the old grounds and rinsing? I've noticed funny flavors when using reusable drip filters if I don't wash it frequently.

>>16804634
I just bought it a couple days ago. I've only used it four times so far, but yes I dump the grounds and rinse. I still need to get the filters for it too.

>>16804657
clean it properly and see if that makes a difference. otherwise it's probably your old coffee

>>16804608
old coffee wouldn't taste acidic, it would probably taste flat and lifeless
if you're getting an acidic taste it might be from rancid coffee stuck in your pod/machine/whatever
also might just be that the keurig itself is underextracting your coffee
you can check if that's the case by taking your coffee and brewing it using some other brewer for comparison (aeropress, pour over, cupping, etc.)

What instant coffee do I pick to fuel my programming?

i went to a mandatory staff meeting with my crew that's all girls except for one other guy
they kept talking about how they want to start showing their tits for tips and joked about breast milk lattes
my milf manager brought us all into the bathroom to look at how gross the toilet is and when i started to tuck my shirt in she started teasing me and asking if i was gonna whip my dick out for them

>>16805595
lucky bastad

>love coffee
>drink multiple cups every morning
>ravages my bowels every time
What gives?

>>16805595
If the genders were reversed this would be a national scandal where the cafe owners are charged with sexual abuse and human trafficking, funny how that works.

>>16805595
and why the fuck didn't you whip out your dick for them?

>>16802421
I was actually served this (without the chocolate on top) at a hotel in Mexico when I asked for iced coffee so maybe this is a South American thing

>>16805741
>Mexico
>South American

>>16805789
>Mexico isn't in South America
The absolute state of the American education system kek

>>16805806
Grenada is just off the coast of sa and is a north american country.

>>16805844
Where did you learn that? Corn farming class? lmao

>>16804575
It's the first thing I start with, so by the time I've gotten my stuff together, ground the coffee, tamped, pulled the shot, etc., it's not long after that it ready to go. I'm using the Flair, so it's all time consuming, but I figure it takes much longer to get to the nearest coffee shop that makes anything as good as I can make at home.

>>16805806
>south americans dont consider mexico as south american
>neither do amerikeks
>neither do mexicans

>but this one retard on the internet does

>>16805736
embarrassed because i am shy .. i have a great dick though
one girl was going to take her tits out "as a joke" but my manager yelled at her not to because she was in view of the security cam and the owners are lesbians

>>16805898
See.
>>16797130

what flavors would compliment a dirty matcha latte? are dirty match lattes even good? never had one but my staff is brainstorming a new gimmicky drink

>>16789243
Today I had my coffee with some Milo Powder and Monster Java Swiss mixed in

>>16805699
I love coffee too, but I don't drink more than two 8oz cups, or more than two double shots of espresso. Drinking multiple cups back to back sounds like fuck up your guts especially since most people's "cups" are humongous.

>>16806094
See.
>>16805806

>>16805983
>i have a great dick though
You can't just say that and then not post hog bro

>>16806319
unsee cc/album#KKHpEoJmC6G6frRe
here u go bro

>>16806373
That link doesn't work, did you set it to delete after one view?

>>16806406
yeah i think, never used unsee
why u wanna see my dick so bad bro. u gay or something?

>>16806468
I'm not gay I just like to platonically appreciate aesthetically pleasing dicks

Friendly reminder that espresso is for poofs.

>>16806494
You're in a dick admiration thread now princess.

>>16806494
espresso is for mixing with a shot of bottom shelf bourbon and slamming it back before a long day at the office

>>16789243
>whatcha drinking?
Just made a pot of some Dunkin' original blend medium roast. Nothing special.
>how do you take it?
I just put a tbsp or two of Dunkin' creamer in it. I usually get some pumpkin spice creamer around this year. I just haven't been out in a while and got this picked up for me last time a relative of mine picked up some minimal groceries for me. Didn't want to be "complicated".
>how long does a can of milk last in your house?
Depends, but on average around a week.

Coof

>nguyen is the winner

just got my new 58.4mm tamper yesterday and i fucking dropped it why am i a fuck up

>>16807696
I might need to see moar pictures of your fingers to adequately answer your question

>>16807696
Lol that sucks. What brand? Pullman will refinish mine if I ever fuck it up, but I get dicked with ~$75 shipping to aus and back.

>>16807714
no

>>16807724
motta and it is really nice

>>16807729
Nice. I got all the pullman shit on sale a few months ago. Scuff on the distributor, tiny anodizing flaw on the funnel, and this tamper was supposed to be basic all wood without the finger guard and spacers. I guess they hooked me up since I put in a decent sized order. If I paid retail for it I probably would have just sprung out the extra cost for the bigstep.

How do I get into fun coffee stuff without looking like a fool?
My whole life, I've only ever had plain black coffee (Peets House Blend, 4 cups each morning) and the occasional bottle of Starbucks Frappucino...
I think my ex got me to try a PSL once, but I forget
I don't know anything about espresso (what is it?) or cappuccinos or any of that stuff...
I don't know what to try or what to like, or even where to start
There's a nice indie coffee shop on the ground floor of my apartment building I could go to, but I'd look like an idiot
I'm 34 btw... am I too old for this?

>>16808250
Are you too old to weigh things and boil water?

>>16808250
~$200 hand grinder, temp control kettle, scale, pourover cone.
>I don't know anything about espresso (what is it?)
Coffee under under high pressure at low ratios of bean to water. If you drop $200 on a hand grinder you'll be able to grind fine enough to generate the pressure you need for espresso. Cheapest worthwhile way into espresso is refurb flair and those go for 145-285 depending on the model.
>or cappuccinos or any of that stuff...
Just consult espresso for fags here.
>>16801753
>I'm 34 btw... am I too old for this?
Spend your money however you want. If you buy the shit I've laid out you have a half decent low maintenance coffee bar for ~$500.

>>16808250
There's no age limit to coffee (obviously ?). Go to the cafe and ask them for a recommendation. If they're passionate about what they do they'll put care and thought into a recommendation, if they don't give a fuck then it's not a cafe worth going to. If that's the case then you find one that is.
>>16806263
Dirty matchas are fucking putrid, and I don't even hate matcha. Just don't even try.

>>16798351
Compared to how much sugar is in a pint sized rockstar or monster? That's a fucking nothing

>>16807725
nao poast penor

70cc boiling water
2 teaspoon of Kirkland Medium Roast Instant Coffee + 1 teaspoon of cocoa powder + 1 teaspoon of "Unrefined Natural Dark Muscovado Cane Sugar"
15g Monin Walnut Brownie Syrup
70g whole milk
20g heavy cream
-------
i'm poor. can't afford starbucks or any other coffee shop drinks. so this is how i make sweet coffee drinks. ^_^

>>16808250
Go to a specialty coffee shop and try espresso and pourover see which you prefer. No use buying shit if you decide it isn't worth the effort.

For me it’s black & strong, with delicate flavor

Milk & sugar have no place in coffee

>>16809212
Even specialty cofffee shops are still generally pulling espresso just for use in milk drinks. The espresso isn’t going to be made for enjoying on its own unless you see that they’re grinding a different kinda bean just for plain espresso shots. Seeing that is a good sign they might know what they’re doing

>>16794086
edible stuff doesn't generally come in tubes in the US and I find that disappointing

>>16804056

combine both for the redeye

what am i in for?

>>16809747
café de roastie

>>16809747
It’s going to be clean, round, and balanced. You might taste notes of cocoa and baker’s spice with hints of toffee leading to a smooth finish.

NEW THREAD
>>16809792
>>16809792

>>16808719
Thank you for this, though I'm not sure I want to try making things myself, yet.
>>16808721
>>16809212
So as someone who likes plain black coffee but hasn't tried anything else, what should I start with?
(that's more exciting than plain black coffee)

>>16809747
>woman coffee
no thanks

>>16808724
normal monster only has 54g of sugar

>>16809747
Oh those guys are right down the street from me. I think parisi is a better roaster, but they know it and up their price.

>>16808724
you can get either of those drinks sugarfree and they taste better faggot

Thinking of buying a cheap coffee bean grinder of some kind instead of buying pre-ground stuff.

Do you grind everything at once? Or do you grind just enough for how much you're gonna brew that day? I'm guessing you still save the grinded beans in an air-tight jar like normal.

>>16810593
Once the beans are broken open you'll start to lose flavor as the oils oxidize in as little as 30 minutes. Whole beans keep longer since there is way less surface area for oxygen to degrade the oils. Always grind fresh if you can. If you're going camping or whatever and have to take a ziplock of shit you ground for the trip then go for it.

>>16810593
Grinding just what you're going to use is the entire reason for getting a grinder

>>16791279
ill need the font names

>>16789243
>>how long does a can of milk last in your house?
There's been an open can in my fridge for at least seven months now.

Am I the only person here that uses Ovaltine in their coffee?

>>16809891
Liking 'plain black coffee' is like enjoying 'plain neat whisky' there's a whole world of variation and flavour. Espresso is a heavier, fuller black coffee. Filter is lighter, more tea-like. Coffee beans as re like the pip of a cherry. There are two main processes for coffee beans, washed (where the fruit is washed away before drying), and natural (where the fruit remains). Others exist but those are the main two, and are quite different. I would try to find a few washed and natural coffees to find out what you enjoy in broad strokes. Then you can narrow down a region (SA and Africa being the main ones). Really just get your hands dirty, drink a lot of different coffee and learn about it, then you discover what's gonna suit you best.

>>16811609
Thank you
But I think I've already found the particular coffee that I like, it's the Peets House Blend... I randomly tried a whole bunch from the grocery store years ago.
I really don't have the palette to pick out finer details between flavors, and I never will, so that's what I settled on.
(I will say that I particularly dislike pretty much all Starbucks coffees... bagged or from the cafe. I also fucking hate whatever brand we have at my office, but.. whatever.)
But that is pretty much all I've been drinking since then... I'd like to get into entirely different styles of coffee drinks, but idk where to start.
Like, if I go to a cafe, what can I do to not look like a pleb (which I guess would be ordering black coffee)
...or a complete retard? (I don't even know what drink to use as an example for retarded)

>>16811661
The only way to look like a retard ordering at a cafe is by doing exactly what you're doing right now and obsessing over what your drink makes you look like. The workers don't give a shit what you order, they don't care about your autism.

>>16811661
Just order what sounds interesting to you, no need to dwell on it. Try it, form an opinion and then go back with your slightly better understand of your preferences

>>16811672
haha youre right
hey i wonder what would make people care about me, what do you think? haha?

>>16789243
How good is the Moccamaster really? Surely not worth the cost, right?

>>16811672
>>16811677
The Black Eye sounds interesting... what is that like?
Also, what else do I need to know to order? Will they ask me questions?

>>16811719
Never had one but I assume it's all marketing. I mean it probably is a well made device that can last a long time, made of quality parts and whatever, but I can't imagine it making the coffee any better. It's not magic.

>>16811778
My guy nobody can answer that. Go to the cafe, read the menu, order what looks interesting. They might ask you questions, if they do answer them. Congratulations you just had a completely normal human interaction.

>>16811810
Here is their menu
Normally I'd get a friend to take me and show me the ropes (like when my ex took me to try a PSL once... she actually got upset with how poorly I did), but I don't have any friends anymore, since I moved
I just like to do the research before trying a new thing... especially if it involves other people, so I don't fuck up too badly and ruin someone else's day...

>>16811855
>Pick a thing
>Say that thing to the cashier
>Hand them your money
>Step to the side where they deliver drinks
>Wait
>Collect drink
>Drink it

I legitimately don't understand what else to try to tell you

>>16811855
>pour over 3.75
>chemex 6.25
go to a different cafe anon.

>>16811944
This is the closest cafe to me
The next closest is a Starbucks
The one after that is charging 8 for a chemex... whatever it is