/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>15657715
10:25 he seethes over his worthlessness

>>15657715
Starts to seethe at how pathetic he is at 10:12

I cooked for Jacques and his buddy Pierre Franey, they both approve their meal.

>>15657752
well to be fair jacques would never tell you how much of an embarrassment you are to your family to your face

>>15657752
also I would be happy to cook for jacques but i think i would just end up getting him and myself shitfaced

>>15657752
what did you cook?

>>15657752
what did you cook? if you are lying i will find you and i will rape you until your anus is permanently prolapsed

>>15657715
Literally who?

>>15657773
peirre had the filet of cock and jac the tossed salad

>>15657776
yeah you literally who'd my cum smooth down your throat

>>15657779
lying fag. jesus christ how would you even know about pierre franey

>>15657787
They were having a lite lunch just prior to meeting a very young Andrew to teach him French Technique in the cabana

>>15657809
you fucking faggots are everywhere goddammit.

>>15657715
And yet, you've met him zero times.

>>15657823
I dont know Jacq from a hole in the wall..I said I cooked for them..

>>15657823
yeah except i live on a boat in madison

>>15657752
I just read Pierre Franey's book "A Chef's Tale", a great read, highly recommend. Now I'm tackling all of the recipes in the back

>calls himself J.Kenji Lopez Alt
>charges $15 for a pretzel
>cooks with a gopro on his head but can't afford socks
he is not based

>>15657823
damn what an own......

>>15657728
Fucking kek. The sighs after he said all that. Like a schoolboy.

>>15657715
imagine being so obsessed with someone that you make a thread about him every single time he uploads a video...

literally nothing you could tell me about him would make him look more pathetic than you do everytime you make one of these embarrassing threads

>>15658208
if kenji is pathetic
and the poster posting about him is even more pathetic
what does that say about the poster posting about the poster who's posting him

Anyone who takes their wive's last name isn't worth my time. What a massive cuckold. And I thought allowing your wife to take a hyphenated last name was beta, good lord.

>>15657715
kenji is a brilliant food science guy, but god is he a pathetic, feeble, insecure little hapa.

>>15658337
Even more pathetic is he uses the same purely to give himself a more exotic flair, as as he shortened James to J. and goes by his middle name. There is 100% chance if his wife's last name was some lame white germanic shit like Alt, he wouldn't be using it.

>>15657715
Never forget.

>>15657715
I like his cooking but wish he wouldn't talk. He sounds like such a god damn queer.

>>15658337
My thoughts exactly

>>15659057
He acts like one too. Let us not forget his mother of all virtue signals when he said he would refuse to serve anyone wearing a MAGA hat at his restaurant. A restaurant located in San Mateo, CA. One of the most liberal places on earth. What a massive faggot.

>>15657715
that burger looks like absolute shit

>>15659157
whats wrong with it?

>>15659049
never forget that the most insecure twerps are narcissists at heart. who sets up a jewgle alert for themselves?

>>15659419
Authors

i thought that was a picture of kay at first.

>>15657715
Pathetic.

you guys ever notice how much this fag ummms and uhhhs in his videos. It makes them borderline impossible to watch

>>15659372
looks like an undercooked meat loaf on a bun

>>15659601
It's the wet chewing sounds after he makes the thing that gets me, no dude I don't need to know how it tastes from your pov, it's not like I can taste it myself

>>15659617
>looks like meat loaf
it doesn't contain anything but ground meat how would it look like meatloaf? Do you know what meatloaf is?

Isn't Pepin like 90 years old? He's barely functioning with his son-in-law (who's his manager) controlling his every move on camera, and his company having the final cut on all of his guest video appearances.

>>15659645
ok

>>15658341
Truest words
His name is gay and fake too.

>>15657715
I'm not opposed to picrel, but the patty in his thumbnail looks disgusting.

>>15658337
>He took his wife's name.
Ahaha, what a fucking cuck lmao.

>>15659675
This is the food "science" every one talks about? I don't get it. Is he actually scientifically knowledgeable? From what I read I wasn't too impressed. Maybe it's an achievement compared to other chefs or something, I wouldn't know, but his scientific literacy doesn't seem to be any greater than a college student who's actually interested in their studies outside of class.

>>15659757
He has an undergrad from MIT so that makes him more trustworthy than bill nye.

>>15659757
It's basic stuff like maillard reaction and things that make baseboys cream their pants.

I had to stop watching his channel since he came out as a radical leftist and tranny enabler.

>>15659724
Reminder that there is NOTHING wrong with taking your wife's last name if it's better than yours.

>>15659823
This is true. But it is completely based on whether or not you enjoy watching your wife being fucked by other men.

>>15657715
Who is this retard and why do I care?

>>15659915
3edgy5me

>>15659815
He genuinely attempted to make a little post once justifying him shoving his gay virtue signaling into his cooking videos. He even very embarrassingly made a post to his subscribers endorsing Joe Biden.

Allow me to summon him

The Food Lab

HEY KENJI, FUCK YOU

>>15658070
>cooks with a gopro on his head
lmao

This guy is monitoring this thread.

>>15660025
lmao, you dumb polshits are the worst.

>>15660048
>you're a polshit if you don't support sniffy joe

lmao alright kenji

>>15660069
>your guy lost months ago
>still seething
cool babyrage, bro

>>15660069
>>15660081
fuck trump, fuck biden, fuck james alt

I watched a few of his late night cooking at home things on jewtube. I must say, his stuff looks like it's too much trouble for the end result. Why the fuck would you bother, it takes him 30 minutes to make a fucking sandwich. Plus he has such a faggoty name. I don't even wanna know how to pronounce it.
Why are food tv people such fucking faggots all the time thinking they are rock stars?

>>15660093
Jenji's never been on TV

>>15660114
Well he's all over YouTube being recommended and selling a cook book so I just figured he would be. Looks like a fat down syndrome hapa

>>15660134
You assumed wrong, retard.

>>15660172
Ok so you still think there's a difference between a chef celebrity doing YouTube channels and being on some shitty tv station. I haven't watched TV in decades. Point still stands.

>>15660189
>I haven't watched TV in decades.
impossible, since you haven't even been alive for 2 decades

>>15660081
don't care, not even american, stop shoving your fucking politics in my feeds

Who and who?

>>15659629
>loud slurping noises
>wet chomping from chewing with his mouth open like a baseborn fucking slob
>somehow swallows the food in a giant fucking lump to make the most awful squelching noise

>>15657715
>make video about jacques pepin
>spends the entire time talking about himself and what he thinks jacques pepin thinks
He's got an insane ego. Jacques just instructs and cooks, he never and has never made it a fucking movement or tried to change things. And clearly he doesn't know shit about Jacques because Jacques never calls his cooking "european", in fact he always says about the opposite.

>>15660602
KEK

>>15657715
J kenji based alt

>>15659601
>>15659629
>>15660602
>>15660688
I've never witnessed a more obvious or pathetic samefag
Holy shit

He went to MIT so he's automatically smarter and of superior genetic stock than every state school peasant in here.

>>15657823
I've met him zero times yet I can easily remember who he is. Kenji must have brain damage.

>>15661711
East coast cope
Plus he studied architecture which is a fucking meme
t. student at St. Anford

>>15662048
>St. Anford
who?

>>15657715
Shouldnt be insulting. Pepin is old as fuck and has probably met a literal million different chefs in his lifetime

>>15661869
>Kenji must have brain damage
Explain, please.

>>15661869
it's pepin who can't remember him you absolute fucking retard
why are ESL spics on this site

Why does he wash his hands with hand soap and then immediately does it again with dish soap? Is this a technique I don't know about yet?

>>15657715
i like his recipes but he looks like a fat lesbian that belongs on orange is the new black getting assfucked by gina carano

>>15662059
I think you're retarded.
Take out the full stop.

>>15662195
>full stop
Huh? English please, my little beaner. I'm really trying here, Paco.

>>15658337
Welcome to the vortex, cucks

>>15662117
I didn't watch the video, I just read the faggot OP's sentence. The way he wrote it it can be read either way, and you're a dumb fucking retard for not realizing that. You have no business criticizing anyone's grasp of the English language when something that fucking simple is beyond you.

>>15662532
>make a glaring mistake like an absolute troglodyte
>"UHHH NOOOO YOU THE DUMBO"

Pathetic display, Amerimutt.

>>15662532
>The way he wrote it it can be read either way
Are you aware of the function of the comma in:
>SIX times, he still

Indulge me real quick. Does it have the same meaning as:
>SIX times he still

>>15662664
>>15662644
Embarrassing imbeciles right here.

>>15662664
The comma in that sentence makes no difference in regard to specifying who "he" is referring to. Keep digging yourself deeper, retard.

>>15662692
>The comma in that sentence makes no difference in regard to specifying who "he" is referring to.
Bzzzt. Wrong. It absolutely does.

Pick up a copy of The Trivium, Paco. You'll learn proper English in no time, ese.

>>15662711
And the digging continues.

Kenji is the biggest pleb filter in cooking. People who are just starting to understand cooking look up to him as some kind of a guru, but in reality he's nothing more than a foodie autist whose claim to fame is having read Harold McGee's "On Food and Cooking" and making a website built around regurgitating the ideas. It's obvious that he only has a very superficial understanding about most topics which he masks by this performative science talk, like using the term "Maillard reaction" as often as possible.

A good example is his guide on chocolate tempering, where he concludes that a sous vide setup is the perfect tool for the job, because he thinks that tempering is as simple as melting the chocolate, lowering its temperature to 26 C, then raising it back up to 31 C and that's all there is to it. It's true that tempering generally follows these steps, but in actuality it's a very complex process with many other considerations, such as agitation, the lack of which in a sous vide process like this typically leads to bad results. If you read the comment section of that article, many of the people who tried his stupid method complain about it.

It's a perfect example of his lack of deeper understanding, because he clearly just read some quick introductory text on chocolate tempering, focused on the few easily digestible details while ignoring the underlying complexity, and then wrote a big article about how he's figured out the perfect method for tempering chocolate. And of course it's sous vide, which every foodie autist is obsessed with because it promises simple answers to complex problems (no, cooking is not as easy as dialing in a time and a temperature). You can see this repeated in many of his articles.

>>15662715
Predictable response.. I'm trying to help you beaners. Stop gnashing your teeth.

>>15662723
Unfortunately you're too retarded to help anyone. Stop trying.

>>15661869
are you retarded

>>15657715
>>15657728
Are you missing the part where Jacques Pepin literally reached out and requested he make a video for his Foundation's video archive, hence, the creation of the video you just fucking watched? You retards have the comprehension of 5 year olds, I swear.

>>15662720
Are there any good resources for in depth exploration of cooking? Is that book worth reading?

>>15658341
This. I trust his methods and experiments in making food better but god is he such a whiny little shit.

>>15662059
Are you actually retarded?

>GUYS
>GALS
>NONBINARY PALS

>>15657715
he looks like an alcoholic lesbian.

>>15659419
people who make a business out of their name maybe?

>>15659815
very fragile post

>>15659143
And then backtracked like the absolute bitch he is after his investors spanked him.

>has his bin on the fucking table right next to where he's preparing the food because he's too fucking lazy to walk back and forth
anyone else bothered by this?

>>15657828
opera bar in Sydney, was having a beer there the other day, unfortunately Hitler wasn't in at that particular time which really got me down.

>>15659601
where can I watch your cooking videos, chef?

>>15659049
lmao does he really follow 4chan of all things?

>>15664427
Did he? Source?

>>15664705
No, he just has Google alert him if his name pops up. Although, it wouldn't surprise me if supposed SJWs acts different here. Kinda like how Joss Whedon acts like a feminist on Twatter but calls actresses fat and ugly if they get pregnant while being one of the ugliest, bald, fat guys on set.

>>15659143
The thing is, San Mateo is truly the opposite of the “liberal” dream. Or maybe it is emblematic of the “liberal” endgame. Imagine a world where money rules everything. Have you been a bad boy? Money takes care of that. Have you been violent and committed the cardinal sin of being caught? Money takes care of that.

On the flip side, want to get ahead? Parrot the talking points. Want to get ahead further? Parrot the talking points with implicit threats of violence, just enough to dogwhistle it, nothing more. Thankfully, this same BS he’s partaking in shut his ass down for a full year as a sacrifice to moloch, I hope him and his staff go bankrupt and die homeless.

>>15664749
>No, he just has Google alert him if his name pops up.
what kind of an absolute idiot does this?

>>15662532
>"I was wrong"
>start schreeching like some retarded American

>>15664813
A narcissistic. Plus, like most people in media, he wants to see the praise. Most surprising to me when comparing his diligent recipe tips is his how filthy his kitchen habits are. Sometimes after touching raw meat, he would just wash with plain water. Also, he added a camera to the pan so when he starts stir-frying, he can give the viewers motion sickness.

>>15662720
My grandma used to temper chocolate by laying on a marble slab and working with spatulas. She didn't even have a thermometer.

>>15664272
He really does kek

>>15659815
very based post

>>15664586
What you mean like a compost bin or do you mean a trash can? I cut up vegetables with the compost bin right next to me all the time.

>>15657715
Is kenji becoming a tranny?

>>15665574
compost. idk about you but i don't like having decomposing food right next to fresh food

bump

>>15657715
Why is he fat? Has he tried not being fat?

Fucking freak. I bet his wife hates having sex with him.

>>15657715
>um
aaaaaaaaaAAAAAAAAAAA SHUT THE FUCK UP

>>15665704
I give it less than 3 years and we'll hear an announcement.

>>15657715
I genuinely don't see how a woman can be attracted enough to this man to have children with him. He must have a lot of money.

I know who Jacques Pepin is but don't know who James Alt is so fuck him I guess?

>>15667309
Quarantine must've been rough, looks like some pretty dramatic weight gain

>>15664844
>after touching raw meat, he would just wash with plain water
i do this all the time desu. never had food poisoning once

Is that the spergaloid who says the asian food isle in the grocery store is racist?

>>15657715
First time I ever watched a video of his

>Touches raw meat, then touches olive oil, camera
>Burger patty has no crust
>Dog bowls in the kitchen
>Cheese was not melted

Why do you guys constantly cream your pants over this man?

>>15659419
The guy makes a living off of people trusting his name, so for him thats just doing business.

>>15667309
His wife is an engineer at Google. He's the gold digger.

>>15657715
>talks constantly
christ is this guy allergic to silence or something?

>>15659772
His degree is in architecture though, not any scientific discipline. Though IIRC he started out as a biology major so presumably he had some formal coursework in science.

>>15667309
You must not be a very good cook anon

>>15664648
were you drinking the same beer?

>>15658321
What about the poster posting about the poster who's posting about the poster who's posting him?

>>15671272
ha ha le updooted!

>>15670178
Maybe he's anxious. When I started making videos back in the day, I kept running my fucking mouth a mile a minute because of some weird stage fright. It's a lot better with more people.

>>15671340
Adam?

>>15662999
You actually think Jacques, and not some 18 year old dipshit YouTube addicted Secretary, reached out to this faggot?

>>15658208
I’ve never made any threads about this fat headed little bitch I just thought him crying on camera about how Jacques doesn’t remember him was hilarious.

Why is he always using a lighter for his stove? Is his stove a piece of shit?

>>15671272
I'll keep you posted

Kenji Lopez abcdefg of whatever his name is, is so hideous and unpleasant to look at, but his cooking is ultra based.

>>15657715
PUT SOME FUCKING SOCKS OR SHOES ON FOR FUCK SAKE

>>15671899
Oh and your burger looked like shit

>>15671340
He's constantly stuttering and dropping shit in his videos so yeah he's a scared little bitch.

>>15671340
he's been making videos for years though and clearly doesn't have a problem putting his face out there, he shouldn't be getting nervous at this point

>>15657715
How much estrogen is this mutant taking?
Also for google alert, "kenjicuck".

>>15672496
And yet he is. I've also seen him literally say in some of his videos that he gets nervous making them.

>>15664936
too bad your grandma is laying on a marble slab in a mausoleum now instead lmao

>>15657828
That girl should lose some weight

>>15672577
Kek found the gay!

>>15671452
He said it's a brand new stove but the ignition broke.

>>15657715
Tomato’s don’t belong on a burger

>>15661869
>>15662532

>>15673565
talk about a short temper

>>15662504
huh?

>>15664768
I was with you until you implied covid was a supernatural ritual or whatever

>>15657809
quite possible young zimmern was sucking backalley cocks and snatching purses in his early days as a hustling jewish street urchin

>>15673855

>>15674290
>implying that you can defeat the literal Leprechaun

>>15657715
Like John prine said, if you meet someone at the Armadillo World Headquarters you could hang out with them for a week and still not know their name.

>>15674433
except he didn't say that he didn't remember his name...he said doesn't remember him

>>15674448
In the context John prine meant that as well. He was talking about how people were looking at him strangely for asking who was Blaze Foley.

I fucking love Kenji threads on /ck/ hehe
I remember when people here were lapping up his cum when he had no audience
But now since his channel has grown and he's shoving his SJW drivel more and more into his videos /ck/ did a 180. Fuck this round looking mutt freak

>>15674488
ok move the goalposts that's fine but i don't think john pine would make a youtube video crying about how no one remembers who he is

>>15674519
>/ck/ did a 180
as should anyone in the face of someone blatantly using their modest popularity as a soapbox to shill tepid neoliberalism to other neoliberals. no one gives a fuck about your retarded political opinions (except the people with the exact same ones), just show me the best way to make gazpacho

The Food Lab
J. Kenji Lopez-Alt

just so this pings his name alert and he reads this

>>15657715
>Guys, gals, non-binary pals
Dropped the video right there.

>>15657715
i genuinely thought that was Kay at first.

I genuinely liked Kenji and still think he's a decent dude but his videos started to get annoying to me and not for the polshit reasons like the incels are seething about. The "I fucking love science!" long winded bullshit to describe why he's doing something instead of being concise and to the point started to get on my nerves. I was finally pushed over the edge when he went on for like 5 fucking minutes about salting your eggs before cooking talking about protein matrixes and other gay shit when he could have just said "hey retards salting your eggs before cooking is fine".

Ironically someone who got on my nerves before but has become my go to and is insanely based is Chef John. Just gets to the fucking cooking, no focus on him as an individual unless it's for humor and great recipes anyone can follow at home. His tonal inflection is still kind of grating but it's starting to normalize to my ears.

>>15657715
Christ, when did he get this fat? He looks like absolute shit.

>>15676818
>polshit reasons
Him forcing his politics and pronoun shit into things is a negative regardless of /pol/.

>>15657715
>guys gals non-binary pals
Why does he do this fag shit lmao

>>15677072
cause he's a bitch kek

>>15664749
https://www.eater.com/2019/2/1/18206921/kenji-lopez-alt-maga-hats-wursthall-controversy

>>15657715
be straight with me niggas, this boi a cuck?

>>15677072

y'all are obsessed huh? things change, keep up

>guys, gals, non-binary pals

Jacques should have deboned him like a chicken all those years ago

>>15676818
Gimme your top 3 chef john vids

>>15677389
Yeah I fuck his tight Columbian wife on the regular. Kenji cooks us food afterwards. It's comfy.

>>15677480
post pics of wife

>>15677485

>guys, gals, non-binary pals

>>15659757
well he does do research and actually tests stuff so I trust his stuff more than most other blogs. doesn't mean he isn't soy. Some of his recipes are actually pretty good.

>>15677647
what a bitch

>>15657715
>Guys gals non-binary pals
What did he mean by this?

>>15677647
that's a funny looking dog

>>15679521
I mean yeah she's a little rough but most latinas become that way.

>>15676860
Read your own post again and admit why you’re retarded

>>15679521
come on man don't speak about his wife that way

>>15679548
Raising dogs takes its toll on a woman

KENJI IS A DUMB NIGGER. THERE, I FUCKING SAID IT.

>>15659757
He's got nothing on Alton Brown. Good eats and the new good eats returns are food based science goldmines.

>>15657715
who are either of these people?

E-celeb threads are cancer and against >>>/global/rules/11 and >>>/ck/rules/1
OP is a faggot.
Do your part to help purge this board of subhumans like him by reporting this thread.
Here's a link so you don't have to scroll up to the top of the page.
https://sys.4channel.org/ck/imgboard.php?mode=report&no=15657715

>>15680256
1) nobody gives a fuck about the rules.
b) that rule doesn't apply here.

>>15677647
qt3.14 tbqhwyf, would colonize

>>15672550
got his ass

>>15680256
>against >rule 1 FOOD AND COOKING
>video about a dude cooking
uhm okay hon.

>>15679604
Read yours instead idiot, not wanting any of that garbage on a cooking channel has nothing to do with being a "/pol/ incel/"