/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>15413641
Make a deviled egg recipe, but mash it all up instead. Regular egg salad kinda sucks.

>>15413641
I called my boss a nigger and got fired on Thursday I don’t give a shit I’m just living off the land and raising white children

try mustard egg and mayo

>>15413720
dont do this it creates mustard gas

>>15413641
You're asking here because you hate you co-workers and want to get a good laugh at their expense right? Just get the shittiest cheapest ingredients you can find, I'm talking grade b eggs, knock-off welfare mayo and try to get some msg powder to give the egg salad that extra ooomph in flavor, hell throw in some cheap shit mustard too. Laugh as they eat it away and comment how it's pretty good and tasty. Don't spend more than $3-$4 dollars though for extra laughs at their expense.

>>15413743
Can you turn it up a notch further, like getting them to eat feces or shit their pants uncontrollably?

>>15413743
What is grade B eggs

>>15413753
eggs straight from OP's ass

>>15413766
True story: my dad is transgender

>>15413766
OP has a cloaca

>>15413641
>We are having an office potluck on Wednesday and need a foolproof egg salad recipe.
First of all, egg salad is a weird potluck item. Is it a sandwich party? My favorite features mango chutney, curry powder, lime zest and cilantro but that won't fly with everyone. There's a deviled egg version, but again, people typically like it basic, plus maybe 1 herb, like tarragon or dill. My sister-in-law makes an egg-chicken-potato salad that has a lot of cream cheese in it, which is delicious at parties. I think that's a cuban specialty.
If you really have to make this salad, then make them finger party sandwiches. Firm and dense, very soft and fresh white bread, or combo of wheat and white bread, medium to thin sliced. If not going with your store bakery slicing it, then think pepperidge farm thin sliced.
Eggs, chop the whites separately, and to the yolks mash in bowl or food processor with green onion tops, mayo, splash of pickle juice (or fresh dill), salt, pepper, fold into the whites. Spread between slices. High tea/70s style finger sandwiches. With sharp serrated knife you clean off between each cut, cut off crusts, stack then cut in half or fourths, arrange on platter, cover with barely damp paper towel, cover in plastic, refrigerate til morning. You can coat the crusts in softed butter and lots of fresh parsley if you wish. I sometimes like a bit of baby arugula or watercress in there, slice of roasted pepper, or olives, sandwiched in there but it won't please every palate in a workplace. Go japanese style and show off a perfect cross section of hard boiled egg down the center when you cut into it. If going really generous and/or easy, consider deli ham salad or chicken salad, or pimento cheese, to make variety on your platter. Easy mode is baby rolls lilke hawaiian rolls. They can be sliced down the middle too.

>>15413776
>putting this much effort into replying to a Shitpost

>>15413753
In the US we have egg grades, grade b is basically the worst you can find in a super market usually, I think there's a grade c in the US, but they're strictly for commercial use and broken down into egg powders or egg type products. They're determined graded on yolk height and egg white staying uniform, grade b eggs are basically flat yolks and the whites run like water if you break them in a pan. I mean if you're baking a cake using grade b eggs probably won't make a difference, but think about it, why the hell are grade b egg yolks flat instead of rounded and same with the whites all runny.
>>15413750
Have you ever heard of the tragedy of /k/?

>>15413776
Fucking based.
You are the egg salad king.

>>15413688
Kek. I called a coworker a nigger on Thursday and nothing happened.

>be me
>quit smoking 8 years ago
>still chew nicotine gum like a fiend
>ran out of gum
>forgot wallet at home
>bum a cig from coworker and smoke out back
>old nig nog comes walking by
>"aye oh, hol up, watchoo smokin fo?"
>"I need nicotine, forgot my wallet and I'm out nicotine gum"
>"Sheeeit, you wan sumpin to chew on? I got sumpin fo you to chew on!"
>" I said I need nicotine, not niggertine"

:^)

>>15413776
>chop the whites separately
There is no reason for this if you are adding the yolks in anyways

>>15414394
K

>>15414417
I think it's just because the yolks are mashed separately with the other ingredients so it mixes smoothly, otherwise the whites get in the way.

>>15413743
The msg tip is actually a good one. I use it in egg/tuna/chicken salad and it works well in these.

>>15414394
Based

>>15413641
I just made some and ate it with about 6 slices of bacon on toast

>>15414394
That's funny but the whole point of nicotine gum is to eventually ween yourself off of the dependancy completely

>>15413641
>Egg salad potluck
Why do you hate the other people?

>>15414417
I’ve tried it both ways and adding the yolks separately is the best. It acts as a thickener to the wet ingredients so the salad comes out thicker

>>15414884
>He wants to befriend co-workers
Lmao what a loser

>>15414417
>>>15413776
>>chop the whites separately
>There is no reason for this if you are adding the yolks in anyways
Except when a literal tablespoon goes into a finger sandwich. And, yes, the yolks blend better in a big ass batch of salad when you tip them into the bowl that gets the condiments and seasonings for a good blend up.

>>15414896
There is not making friends and then there is active malice like feeding them eggsalad, he might as well just kick them in the balls and have done with it.

>>15414836
>the whole point of nicotine gum is to eventually ween yourself off of the dependancy completely
Except most people find the addiction too hard to overcome entirely. It's better to chew gum the rest of your life than inhale smoke.
I'm sure most people are chewing gum now to evade no smoking laws in planes, workplace and public places anyway in this age.

>>15414914
It's a work potluck, why would you want to cook something that requires more effort or time for something like that? OP is based fuck them co-workers, eat the egg salad or don't eat it's not like he is gonna get paid for bringing food

>>15414954
Why wouldn't he make an Elvis instead and see who get the trip to flavor town.