/ck/ - Food & Cooking

sounds like a chad, meanwhile you seethe and blogpost about him

>>15410643
I don't seethe about it, I find his eating habits funny and bizarrely endearing

>>15410654
If you think he's so funny and bizarrely endearing, maybe you should suck his cock.

>>15410629
You’re getting alphaed by this total chad. Everything he’s doing is a power move to make you feel insecure. And you’re playing right into his giant bull hands by posting about it to a bunch of alcoholic food autists.

>>15410670
Why exactly are you so upset anon?

>>15410629
>jar of parmesan cheese

Anyone using that Kraft stuff is trash

>>15410629
sounds like my roommate except he knows how to say spaghetti and eats popcorn and coke instead of the stuff you listed

Literally nothing wrong with canned sauce.

>>15410743
My roommate quenches his thirst with Dr. Pepper

>>15410629
Fun Fax: roommates are garbage 100% of the time, and yours is no exception.

Every time he says spaghetti wrong you should very quickly, in passing, correct him and see if it every sinks in

my roommates only ever eat frozen fried foods and it makes me genuinely worried for their health

>>15410774
Air fryer?

pull out your junk next time and ask if he wants some extra pegsketti and meatballs

>>15410629
You may be living with a retard

> he won't drink water

>>15410629
>Half a jar of parmesan cheese
Based

>>15410760
Is your roommate a mad scientist?

tell him to heat the sauce in a pan and season it. But at least he's not leaving shit to spoil.

>>15410629
>>A few times a week he cooks a box of spaghetti, pours a whole damn jar of spaghetti sauce into the cooked spaghetti, and about half a jar of parmesan cheese
That's literally the recipe for busketty. You're confusing it with spaghetti.

My best friend from high school lived with me for a year and he had some weird food quirks. He put soy sauce on everything, pizza, mashed potatoes, broccoli, on tacos. Same with ranch. He lived on the outskirts of New York for a couple months with his ex and would always talk about how everything in New York was the best and so much better than anything I got. I’d order pizza and he would complain the entire time about how the pizza is New York is better, same with pho and literally everything. Love the dude to death but holy fuck that was the most annoying year of my life.

>>15410629
>be me
>get roommates because money
>one of them is a high school football star now drop out ex weed dealer do nothing lay about
>eats nothing but large Uber eats fast food take out meals big enough for 3 people funded by his grandma
>calls grandma once every 3 days for a reup on fast food
>roommate actively gets out of shape over the span of a year and gets psychically upset by it.
Pretty funny to watch in retrospect

>>15410891
Fuck new yorkers.
>Oh the water here tastes funny its not as good as back home
Its spring water, from a spring 2 miles away that has its own purification system. Fuck off with your 19th century plumbing you fucking snowbirds.

Not a roommate, but a guy who lived in my freshman dorm. I went to a liberal arts college, and the freshman dorm I was in was tiny, only around 50 kids.

>NEVER went to the dining hall
>Spent almost all of his time in his dorm room
>Ordered a medium Pizza Hut pepperoni pan pizza for lunch and then ordered another one for dinner
>Also ordered a 2 liter of soda with lunch
>Between the pizza and soda he was consuming over 5,000 calories per day
>On weekends he'd sometimes order a THIRD medium pizza to eat while he gamed all night long
>Room smelled horrible, but his roommate couldn't move because there weren't any open rooms
>Made zero effort to socialize or interact with anybody
>If you tried to talk to him he'd just sort of grunt, mumble, or nod
>Guy packed on so many pounds that his clothes were way too small at the end of the first semester and part of his stomach was exposed when he left his room no matter how he tried to pull his shirt down to cover it
>He had to wear his stretchy athletic shorts instead of pants because his pants no longer fit
>He sat there hunched over his gaming laptop, mostly just getting up to get his pizzas and only sometimes going to class
>RA desperately tried to get the guy to go to counseling, start showering, and clean the fucking room
>RA even contacted a dean and the head of residential life to try to get somebody to step in
>Pizza Guy had random angry outbursts while gaming and would slam his fists down on his desk
>His roommate started sleeping on the floor in another dorm room already occupied by two guys because Pizza Guy was stinking up the whole room

He failed out and didn't return after first semester. I still wonder how he paid for all that pizza.

>>15410629
You should twirl your hair playfully next time he says that and with a sly smile say, "Ay, bruh. I think it's cute the way you say spaghetti like that and the quirky way you make it. I have a quirk too. I love buh-sketti but with manicotti and to suck out the loads and loads of ricotta inside until I'm completely stuffed. Maybe we could both make some and then proceed directly to your room." Then come back with a dictionary.

If things go well, he'll perceive your bafflement and question belief in what spaghetti is called and you can both look the word up. Then he can try something new for dinner like stuffed manicotti and not eat the same things all the time and you can share it.

>>15411041
I'm so glad he was in my dorm because he was fascinating. Being his roommate would have been horrible though. Every few months I wonder what he's up to. Nobody stayed in touch with him and he doesn't have Facebook. I don't even remember (I might never have known) where he was from and he had a fairly common name.

My mom called spaghetti spook-ghetti when she served it around Halloween and that was always fun :3

>>15411534
Based.

I noticed my roomate doesn't spice any of his food.

>>15411701
What about salt?

>>15410718
He's not upset he's a relationship guru

>>15410760
What a fucking chad. I kneel.

>>15411701
This is fairly common with homosexual men who prefer to bottom. It prevents the top from getting a spicy wiener and the sex smells muscly better. The more you know.

>>15410629
Sounds like you don't have to share the kitchen with him much, compared to if he was cooking real food every day.

>>15410629
That's a weird way to write spapeggy.

>>15411041
absolutely keyed

>>15411534
Based mom.

>>15410629
Not really an eating habit but I had a roommate in college that had to "one up" me on everything I cooked. For instance, if I made spaghetti he would go to the high end grocery store the next day and spend 5 times as much on ingredients then spend 5 times as long in the kitchen making his version. Rich, snobby white kid named Caleb

>>15410629
>he doesn't say sketti
NGMI

>>15412490
Did he share tho ? Sounds like a great way to get free delicious food lmao

>old roommate teaches me what he knows about cooking and we proceed to learn more together for years
>still best friends to this day

>>15412523
Did you kiss?

>roommate was a serious alcoholic and would sometimes pass out on the kitchen floor while cooking
I had to watch the kitchen when he started cooking while drunk

>>15412528
Yes, on our wedding day

>>15412552
3dpd

>>15412506
Yes he shared but would look at me expectedly while I ate, waiting for me to tell him how good it was and how it was better than mine. I took great pleasure in never giving him the satisfaction, always downplaying my reaction and not engaging in conversation for him to tell me all about his quality ingredients and superior cooking techniques

>>15412528
I wish

>>15412569
That news story was just a joke, it did not really happen.

>>15412582
Caleb sounds like a bro and you sound like a bitter and jealous poorfag

>>15412603
I don't believe you, that's totally something a woman would do.

>>15412615
look it up you goofazoid

>>15410629
I would wonder what my roomates thought of me since my diet was 40%burgers 30%indomie 20%beer for about 14 months

>>15412628
They probably didn't care to notice.

>>15411041
Imagine the smell

>>15412569
What’s 3dpd?

>>15412651
deez nuts

>>15412651
Your mother

>>15410911
Imagine being mad at water

>>15412642
Yeah true

>>15412757
>this is your brain on patriotism

>>15411057
Kekd

>>15412582
You sound like an autist

>>15412613
This, just muse his mild autism and tell him it was great but yours was better. Rinse and repeat, get free meals while potentially maintaining a friendship

Autist.

>>15410718
It’s your roommate trying to get his cock sucked you dumb faggot

>two roommates
>one was pretty alcoholic and rarely ate
>made amazing food when he wanted to, I'm talking restaurant level food that was usually pretty healthy too
>roommate #2
>his mom always dropped junk food off for him.
>his diet was spaghettio's, box mac n cheese, sugary cereal and chips.
>would regularly drive to McDonald's when he was black out wasted cause he was too lazy to make his own can of food.
2nd one disgusted me but he had a terrible past of drugs

>>15413430
This, you know what you have to do, anon.
t. filthy fujo

>>15410629
ask him to replace spaghetti with crumbled oven-ready lasagna noodles (not that shitty gluten free one) and throw it all in the same pot

>>15410629
>a box of spaghetti, pours a whole damn jar of spaghetti sauce into the cooked spaghetti, and about half a jar of parmesan cheese
I'm doing some Sunday morning drinking and that sounds really good to me right about now.

I lived with a Bosnian girl once who got super offended about a dinner I cooked one time because "you can't have ground beef with rice, ever"
I still think she was in the wrong on that one, although every other aspect of that trainwreck of a relationship was definitely on me.

>>15413479
I want to impregnate that woman