/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>15114244
Yeah alright, got you, gotcha, ok, sounds good. Thanks, ok?

>>15114244
Bet you like cum too

Before the internet and pop culture made everyone a critic, mixers were invented so liquor would taste better. All muh flavor profiles are marketing and ego stroking.

Don't get the cheapest shit and try different ones to find one you like.

>>15114244
I drink to get drunk so for me it's liquor. It took me about a month into a college to figure out how and what liquor to drink without having to grimace through it.

>>15114282
Yes and theres hundreds of videos out there of liquor experts being fooled by blind tasting. The whole liquor critic shit seems like a huge scam

>>15114244
That's probably a good thing anon, don't let alcohol rule you. There comes a point when you're alone at your computer, crying over photos of your ex, realizing you'll be 30 in a couple of months with nothing but loneliness and a beer belly to show for it.

>>15114378
>There comes a point when you're alone at your computer, crying over photos of your ex, realizing you'll be 30 in a couple of months with nothing but loneliness and a beer belly to show for it.
Hits too close to home, fuck you man

>>15114378
>photo of your ex
Do n*rmalfags really?

>>15114244
I love the burn, reminds me of happiness. But I'm also an alcoholic so there's that.

>>15114244
thats because beer is more air than alcohol. start slow, sip something fine(like scotch or bouron, cognac, mezcal) like you are drinking piping hot tea/coffee and let it rest in your mouth for 5-10 seconds while rolling it around your tongue and when you swallow hold your chin down and let your muscles do the work. that way you will still have a small layer on your palate. now concentrate on the flavors present. it may help to do this in a quiet place with no visual or other distractions. until you acquire the the proper skill to pick up subtleties. also having something like a light tea or something neutral to open and cleanse your palate so that you are getting the most pure profile possible before you start sipping as things you eat during the day can cramp the flavor something awful. thats IF you are looking for flavor. if you are just looking to get pissed quick and cheap then soak a tampon in some nail varnish and put it in your butt for a couple minutes and then rinse it with ice water until its numb.

>>15114583
will ethyl acetate up my ass really get me drunk the cheapest? You sound experienced so tell me more about what you know

>>15114590
Please do not shoot random chemicals up your butt.

>>15114593
I wouldn't, I'm just trying to engage with the liquor tasting autist since he put a lot of effort into his comment and will probably feel hurt if nobody replies

>>15114244
I don't like most liquors and beer, one tastes like acid and the other piss. The only booze I do drink is cider and some weak mixed drinks.
How sissy am I, /alk/? I want to like boize but the only beer I've liked are lambics

>>15114595
Wouldn't shitposts just upset him more?

>>15114609
nah it's all about the you's

>>15114611
I suppose so.

>>15114590
getting "butt-drunk" was something the posh did throughout the annals of history, but can be life threatening if you over do it(easy to do) if you're serious about trying that method with ethyl acetate then you can dilute it a decent margin(try something like 5 parts water to 1 part alcohol, largely depends on things like BMI and blood pressure)to be safe by mixing with water or saline solution. using an actual tampon, homemade or othewise will probably help you absorb the mix slower, but you could also just use something like an enema kit, turkey baster, eye dropper. just so long as you flush the cavity thoroughly with water afterwards you should be fine. remember, babysteps Anon.

Pussy

>>15114595
thats rlly nice actually

>>15114244
>burning chemicals
Too high of a percentage of alcohol sucks, yeah.

I tried a coworker's absinthe and was coughing for ten minutes. Turns out it was 70% ABV. Even 50% is a bit much for me. 40% (80 proof) is fine, though.

Just throw an ice cube in with your scotch or whatever and it'll be fine in a minute.

As far as other flavors, I really enjoy Laphroaig 10, Hennessy XO, Balvenie Doublewood (not the "caribbean" crap), Auchentoshan Three Wood, Kavalan Sherry Oak, and a lot of various mixed drinks. For lower alcohol percentages, champagne (White Star) and wines (rieslings) are nice.

>>15114244
I don't get beer. Shit just tastes like slightly bitter carbonated water.

I like liquor though.

>>15114244
>tfw unironically enjoy the burning ethanol taste of spirits
>tfw despise most beers and other alcohol
Always space my drinking out though.

Do you want to get into liquor, OP? If so. You already like beer, so maybe try some barrel-aged strong ales or stouts (stay away from pastry stouts) and develop a familiarity with the flavors of a barrel there first.

>>15115139
Sorry for the awkward wording, I'm posting on a commute

>>15114378
Don't listen to this guy. I'm 37 and still married and I fucking HATE my wife and every day is never ending misery with her. I would leave her this instant if it weren't for my son. I'm waiting for him to be a little older as I recall my parents' divorce and how much the custody battles fucked up my childhood.

>>15114639
I've got the mental image of some anon with a turkey baster poised at his anus trying to work up the nerve to shove it in and it's fucking hilarious.

>>15115139
Beer stouts? I love them. Im trying to get into liquor and ive tried a shitton. Even bought blue label the other day and yes it was less harsh but it still just tasted like burning chemical

>>15114244
Get yourself some sweet liqeur

>>15114915
The cheaper beers I started with tasted like that, but there’s plenty out there with more flavour. I’ve recently been drinking a bunch of pic related

>>15114333

As a bartender for ten years I can tell you... yeah pretty much. Mid-Tier shit is almost indistinguishable from the top shelf shit and almost anything well will taste fine if you mix it with something.

Liquor is an amazing investment though as a 3,000 dollar bottle of whiskey can sell for like 4,500 a few years later when the supplies start to diminish or if a celebrity endorses it. Great fucking scam.

>>15116414
150% return after ten years before factoring inflation in isn't so good.

>>15115284
You could try diluting it with water, or soda water. Then you'll start tasting the wood of the cask it was aged in, above the alcohol burn. After all, "Scotch and Soda" and "Bourbon and Branch" are both fairly standard drinks.

>>15114244
Then drink beer. To each their own. Cheers!

Blue Label is LITERALLY burning chemical tasting though so no shit. It's mostly grain whisky AKA shit distilled up to near Everclear percent ABV to mix in with better tasting malt whiskies. Some older grain whiskies can be good but most are trash.

If you want a good blend try anything from North Star or past release bottles from Compass Box (anything pre-2016 is fantastic stuff.)

>I can't handle the burn of spirits

>>15114583
God you obnoxious faggot

>>15114244
I'm a bad Irishman. I don't like anything whiskey. I do like Rum tho. And Jager. Sambuca...

>>15114244
Try cocktails then. Some sour, some sweeet, and all of it complimenting the chemicals. shit's better.

Sipping hard liquor is for fags trying to act cool and manly.

>>15118492
That's not true. There are definitely time's I've enjoyed a good straight liquor. Like Moonshine. That shit is not a mixer. That is what vodka is for.

>>15118507
vodka is for cleaning sinks. No rum and gin are for mixing. Vodka has no flavor profile and contributes nothing to the drink on its own except the buzz. And then Tequila is for shots.

>>15114333
>>15116414

The key to making money off people is to convince them your product makes them appear to have money.

>>15114244
It should taste sweet and smokey, add some water and don't drink to fast.
The burn means your drinking to much and to fast.
If you can't taste the sweetness pick something else, bitter grows into sweetness as the complex and hidden flavors unwrap.

>>15114734
It's not just the abv. I've had a 17% abv barleywine(which was way too expensive) that tasted smoother than a steel reserve.
So if your beer or liquor tastes like shit, it could be because of the abv, but it also could be because it's a lower quality product.

One way to prove this, is to do the math, and to dilute with water a 40% abv vodka for example, down to the abv of a beer, say 5%. If it still tastes like shit, then that means it's a low quality product.
I know personally that titos is NOT a low quality product. So if I were to dilute titos down to 5% abv, it would be like drinking a beer. The only problem is titos is way too expensive.

Regardless of the quality, a lot of the time, liquor is not less expensive than buying beer. You have to actually do the math.

>>15119179
>complex and hidden flavors unwrap.
you fucking hipster fuck you

>>15119179

>>15114639
Ethyl acetate isn’t that bad. I sat next to an ethyl acetate still fit 3 years. DMF and n-hexane on the other hand are nasty.

>>15114282
how uneducated can you be to actually believe this?

>>15114244
great low-key whisk(e)y thread opener OP.

>>15117529

>Thinks he's manly because he drinks shoe polish
>Posts anime

Guess it makes sense to call you people faggots since all your shitty personality traits come as a bundle. And because I assume you're also barely literate, OP said it TASTES like burning chemicals, not that he couldn't handle it. Cope harder with your shit drink, faggot.

Drop a single drop of distilled water into your drink (assuming you are drinking it neat). Give it about a minute to rest than consume.

You will be shocked to taste the difference as the water allows the esters to release.

>>15121711
Sciencelet post. All water does is cause guaiacol to float to the top, so your first sip is way more flavorful then all the rest are way less flavorful.

>>15114244
Hahaha i think the same, liquor tastes like chem and wine like puke. Beer i like :D

>>15117116
Blue is fantastic, the issue people have with it is the price.

Also what's your problem with current compass box releases?

>>15121711
>the water allows the esters to release
broscience

im i a retard for only liking vodka?
everything else has a sort of odd sweetness to it that i absolutely hate

>>15114244
You’ll understand when you graduate high school (I didn’t really understand what made Bourbon/Rye/Scotch etc. so good until my mid-late 20’s).
Get a Glencairn glass (or any other decent sniffer glass) and try to take the time to enjoy your liquor, this guy does an excellent beginner’s guide for whiskey:

https://youtu.be/ci1kbjEmWMk

>>15122610
I’m the opposite, I’ll drink anything besides straight vodka but that’s because I’ve never had high quality vodka before.

>>15122646
i just buy the 5 dollar handle of taaka at winco since its cheap and i like the flavor or lack thereof

>>15122635
>that kid who thinks raiding daddy's liquor cabinet makes him mature

What a pathetic post

>>15122671
>that kid who projects on an anonymous imageboard because he can’t handle liquor

>AH YES MMM I CAN TASTE IT CLEARLY A BOLD SPLASH OF RICH ANAL REAMING AND SURPRISINGLY SMOOTH HINTS OF SHIT-SMEARED COCK WITH NOTES OF TOASTED SWEET SUGAR (BROWN) SUBTLY MERGED WITH MEDIUM-BODIED TONES OF CHOCOLATE (BITTER OF COURSE) AND A PLETHORA OF OTHER IMAGINARY FLAVORS IN THIS FLOOR CLEANER COCKTAIL

>>15114244
Liquor is a stronger, more concentrated flavor. Beer is refreshing but liquor is relaxing. I usually start with 1 stiff beer and then switch to bourbon or scotch.

Maybe start with cocktails, even basic ones like jack and coke, then reduce the amount of mix-ins until you enjoy the whiskey on its own. Or, maybe you just need the right liquor. One of the first that I really liked was Glenmorangie 10 year, a light single-malt scotch that's not too expensive. It might burn your tongue at first but you adapt to it, and eventually you crave the burn and seek out higher proofs

>>15118478
I'm of Italian heritage and can't stand sambuca. Amaros are good though.

>>15115147
Bruh I feel you, to an extent. Grass isn't always greener on the other side.