/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>hawaiian
>""""""""cuisine"""""""
nah its ok, but it's like if some fat retard ate japanese food on a plane once, and tried to recreate it from memory

>>14831326
this/thread
now everyone can go fuck themselves

>>14831326
This may possibly be the best description for Hawaiian food I've ever read.

>>14831252
I've never tried it to be honest.
What's it like?

>>14831374
imagine, with a hamburger patty with a sauteed mushrooms with brown gravy, with a fried egg on top...it tastes exactly as it looks shit head

>>14831326
>some fat retard ate japanese food on a plane once, and tried to recreate it from memory
Hawaiian cuisine in one sentence

>>14831388
*rice with

>>14831326
The funniest thing is historically they had no fucking food. They had one shitty tuber that was all they ate until trade with the polynesians brought coconuts. Naturally Hawaii had jack shit. Now they have axis deer venison but they prefer spam and freeze dried hash browns.

>>14831399
>had one shitty tuber that was all they ate until trade with the polynesians brought coconuts
The first settlers brought both taro and coconuts (and chickens and pigs). Neither were native to Hawaii.

>>14831252
BRAHS

>>14831399
That isn't very funny at all, let alone "the funniest thing"

>>14831508
Its pretty funny

>>14831326
>nah its ok, but it's like if some fat retard ate japanese food on a plane once, and tried to recreate it from memory

so.....like most american cusine?

>american chinese food
sloppa shit
>american italian food
pizza the thickness of a telephone book

>>14831519
>american chinese food
much better than the food you get in China.

>>14831519
Well, Hawaii is in America after all.
>>14831536
False

>>14831399
>fresh fruit
>fish
>molluscs

>>14831536
Haha no, it actually isnt and that's just a sad reflection on America.

>>14831388
>sauteed mushrooms

>>14831536
t. has never even set a toe in china

>>14831559
unlike you ive actually been there.
westernized chinese food is much better.

>>14831565
>unlike you ive actually been there.
press [x] to doubt

>>14831565
>westernized chinese food
>literally deep fried garbage slathered in sugar sauce
>good

>>14831568
shi ma? wo huaiyi ni neng yong Google fanyi zhe juhua

>>14831565
>westernized chinese food
so you like fried chicken and rice. how very "chinese"

>>14831573
go to china and try it for yourself.

>>14831581
The only thing better in china is the Beijing duck

>>14831581
at least Its better than chicken feet and hotpot

>>14831252
looks pretty good

>>14831573
deepfried food is tasty, yes.
sugar is tasty, yes.

>>14831591
Chicken feet is pretty damn good when it's done right. The flesh should be able to easily slide off the bones using just your tongue.

>>14831399
nah they had dog and pork

>>14831326

>>14831252
looks like pretty good gains grub but sparingly unless you want acid reflux

>>14831576
>what now? I am better than you at Google translate

>>14831388
That sounds delicious but it ain't in the picture

>>14831576
ni laowai bu shuo zhongwen

>>14831252
Chud

Rainbow Drive-In, Best drive in.

>>14831326
fpbp

>>14831573
have sex

>>14831252
Aren't Hawaiians extremely fat or is that just a stereotype?

>three carbs in a single dish
Jesus

>>14833074
They evolved with slow metabolisms to cope with the scarcity of food on a pacific island. Then American business and military interests flooded the place with their high fat, high salt, high calorie cheap food. Hawaiians couldn't handle it and became irreparably fat.

>>14831252
>not knowing the difference between Hawaiian food and "local" food
go back mainland fuckin haoles

It's all a weird combination of shit I don't always love, but a loco moco is about as filling and rich as it gets when I'm craving that kind of thing.

>>14833142
Makes sense but do they really have much of a cuisine to mention then that isn't just very unhealthy stuff and besides that it sounds like a pretty sad fate but not surprising as the only thing Hawaiian that I can think of that likely isn't even hawaiian at all is pineapple on pizza

>>14833193
Besides stuff like poi, eggs, chicken, seafood, and pork they didn't have much of a cuisine because they didn't have a lot of ingredients to work with. When American G.Is showed up with stuff like spam, dried pasta, powdered milk, canned chili, mac n cheese, etc the locals incorporated the surplus into what they were already cooking.
That's why the most iconic hawaiian dishes are spam and eggs with rice, or something like Plate Lunch which is basically what OP posted. The most authentic version might have Poi as an option or some kind of panfried fish.

>>14831565
retard

>>14831800

How can an island nation with no contact with other cultures learn to grow and cultivate rice?

>>14831519
obsessed

>>14831326
kind of this

>>14831326
oh so that's why I like it so much

>>14834724
you must be a fat retard

>>14834746
Yes.

>>14834752
>knowyourmeme
dun goofed

>>14831565
I lived with a chinese student at university and they much preferred the greasy as fuck cheap shit we get here to his home cooking. No fuckin' joke.

>>14831326
kek

>>14831252
that looks like filipino breakfast more than anything

>>14834688
It can't. Rice was introduced later

>>14833074
Lot's of Pacific Islanders are actually really obese, but not so much in Hawaii. People there are generally very active, which is why they can regularly eat the carb and salt bomb that is your standard plate lunch. Of course there are exceptions, but most Hawaiians look more like Eddie Aikau than IZ. Back in the day all the royalty was fat because that was considered a sign of wealth and ebullience.

>>14834688
There's traditional Hawaiian food like Poi, Kalua Pork, and lau lau, and then there's "modern" Hawaiian food that resulted from colonialization and a bunch of people coming from Japan, Korea, Philippines, China, and Portugal (don't even ask) to work on the sugar plantations in the 19th century, and then a few things like Spam resulting from WWII. Some stuff has become a complete hybrid of all those influences at this point, and most people generally don't make much of a distinction between "Hawaiian" and "Local", since everything and everyone is a mutt in Hawaii - unless you're a haole.

>>14835383
>Portugal (don't even ask)
Ha. Someone else on this site understands the Portuguese mutts we have out here.

>>14835857
>portuguese mutts
I moved away long ago. Is it no longer normal to call them podagee?

>>14835869
It's all about the Micronesians. They are what every island nigger uses to make them selves feel better about themselves now a days. Also I refuse to use pidgin or even common Hawaiian words like keiki, pau, mauka.

>>14835881
I went to kindergarten/elementary school pretty deep in the boonies with a bunch of valley folk, who mostly dropped out before 5th grade. So even being haole as fuck I had enough street cred to hang out at pretty much any beach without getting my ass kicked by iced up mokes. I hated growing up there, and lost all my pidgin by the time I was in high school, but I've been on the mainland for so long that I have a certain nostalgia. I honestly just want some legit lau lau, and the only place that even serves it is L&L, and the only time I went to that shithole back in the day was when they had li hing mui icees.

>>14831252
based but makes you fat as fuck

>>14835908
You grow up on the Big Island? Oahu is pretty modern these days, well as modern as a third world country pretending to be a part of a first world country can be. I hear Vegas has a lot of island food from all the transplants so if you ever take a trip out there you could get some I think they are even building a Zippy's out there.

>>14835925
Kauai. I've lived in NorCal and the PNW, which is where most transplants seem to end up outside of Vegas (which I've never understood), but even the Hawaiian places that are run by legit locals have maybe oven kalua pork and loco moco, and the rest of the menu is just generic fish and shrimp and teriyaki whatever with rice. It's hard to find anything with luau leaves, let alone ti leaves or butterfish. That "poke bowl" fad from a few years ago is a fucking abomination.

>>14831326
/ck/ - Why is it not in a burger or deep-fried?

>>14831351
And this is why the world hates Americans and their arrogance.
They are poorly educated, don't read books and can't spell to save themselves, yet they think they know fucking everything about the entire world, despite most of them not having a passport.

>>14834698
Cunts like you that post replies like this, need a fucking bullet, it brings nothing at all to the discussion.

>>14831252
Does hawaiian cuisine actually exist still? I mean the stuff actual hawaiians made before japan and america came in and displaced it with bits and pieces of their own culture and left the place eating spam sushi

>>14836019
HAWAII IS AMERICA YOU FUCKING RETARD THIS THREAD IS ABOUT AMERICAN FOOD

>>14835908
>haole as fuck
Is this a typo or is it a new stupid fucking "word" from Reddit/Twatter?
Fucking keep it out of here, you bloody children....

>>14836035
>Does hawaiian cuisine actually exist still?
Yes.

>>14836039
haole is butthurt hawaiian indian's attempt to create a "slur" towards the white people who built everything they have

>>14836039
>is "haole" a typo
Because you totally understood what "iced up mokes", "lau lau", and "li hing mui icees" meant, right? Fucking retard.

>>14831252
Poke and musubi are pretty much the only things worth eating.

>>14831252
>3 pastas
the meat looks nice

I've been cooking a lot of it recently, dunno why. Football day my dinner is going ro be kalua pig with cabbage (actually gai lan but whatever; cabbage gets boring), rice, mac salad and green salad with miso dressing. I'm also going to try making haupia again because the flavor was right but the cornstarch didn't set up right so I'm saying fuck it and using agar instead. I recently made chicken long rice and shoyu chicken too and those were pretty good. I'll probably make some shoyu pork and saimin next week and I'm debating whether or not I want garlic chicken or salt and pepper pork chops enough to try to deep-fry on a piece of shit electric range. I'm still pissed at my local L&L for dropping garlic chicken from the menu because that was my favorite and deep frying at home sucks.

Wish Pats-Chiefs was on SNF instead of the fucking iggles and 69ers.

>>14833074
Fatter than most of the rest of polynesia, not as fat as micronesians.

>>14831576
ding dong gwailo gochujang ramen noodle bat soup dynasty warriors 3 extreme legends?

>>14836219
Share recipes pls

>>14831326
yes

>>14831252
People on these islands were constantly starving and therefore liked fatty foods so when whitey imported fatty chicken butts and other slaughterhouse refuse everything went to shit.

That picture looks delicious

>>14831252
i love it. lived there as a kid so it probably gave me a taste for it. it's kind of ghetto but you start missing it when you realize you will never find the real thing again, it exists nowhere else. i'd kill for some plate lunch like that now. i miss going to the convenience store and getting passion orange drank and a couple of spam musubis.

>>14831326

forgot pic

>>14833074
A lot of them are actually quite fit

>>14835881
Only the old timers can pull off pidgin, modern pidgin makes a person sound so retarded

>>14831326
put me in the screencap

>>14831540
>>14831545
>>14831559
lmao seething Changs
You guys are so easy to spot.

>>14836795
that's the Samoans. they love their turkey tails

>>14831326
had the “best plate lunch on oahu” a couple times, can confirm

>>14836680
Check out Foodland's website and youtube channel. They have hundreds of recipes and all of them have videos. I especially like them because their recipes are more "what people in Hawaii eat" instead of "Hawaiian food". They have recipes for stuff like kalua pork and mac salad and all the usual suspects from the rest of the pacific rim but they also have recipes for stuff that came from resorts and restaurants and white retirees and temporary residents (like military wives) that you find a lot in home cooking and entertaining but that doesn't bring to mind "Hawaiian food" - stuff like hot crab dip and kale salad and baked salmon and pot roast. You never find anyone on the internet who does "Hawaiian" food recipes ever talking about shit like this but if you actually go to Hawaii and get your hands on some local cookbooks and get invited to dinner you see what a hodgepodge Hawaiian food really is. If you go to a potluck hosted by a Japanese/white hapa and her Korean/Hawaiian husband you could easily find pan sushi next to pot roast next to poi next to broccoli beef next to mac salad next to adobo next to cheeseburger sliders on hawaiian rolls next to kimchi next to chicken satay next to ambrosia salad next to malasadas next to mochi next to key lime pie and the cooler has Chu-Hi, beer from Japan, the US, Korea, Germany and China, wine from the US, France and AUS/NZ and sodas for the kids from Japan, the US, Hawaii and Mexico. It's well known that Hawaii is a culinary clusterfuck but a lot of people don't know how deep the clusterfuck runs.

Also the two biggest secrets to top-tier grilled/BBQ meat are to use a marinade that has miso in it (I use Halms) and to hit it with some melted butter once it comes off the grill, ideally by putting it in a foil pan that has some melted butter in the bottom so it has time to sit and soak between then and serving.

>>14833142
It’s like that with all Polynesians. Western diet is killing them.

>>14836019
So why did you attack a person agreeing with it instead of the one who said it, butthurt faggot?

>>14837907
only thing thats good

>>14831326
Damn... imagine the poor native Hawaiian reading that post. That Would be one hell of a site

>>14831252
S'food. Most of it is pretty good for gainz since they don't eat much carbs other than rice Seeing food as more than just fuel is pretty soy and manchild

>>14831252
>What’s the /ck/ consensus on Hawaiian cuisine
Have you seen the size of the average native Hawaiian? The food is made to get people big then kill them off with heart disease and diabetes.

>>14840413
They would have to agree anon. I mean, on of their only icons is morbidly obese ukulele man.

>>14840444
Checked lmao

>>14831252
Fuck them, they're a bunch of cannibals.
the Hawaiian Islanders who killed Captain Cook were not cannibals. They believed that the power of a man was in his bones, so they cooked part of Cook's body to enable the bones to be easily removed. It was the cooking of his body which gave rise to the rumour of cannibalism.
Not just that but they're arrogant scumbuckets.

Anyone that goes around wearing vans and sketchers and calling people howlies is pretty pathetic and useless. They're not the only ones that live by an ocean.

>>14831326

as someone who lived in Hawaii for four years this really hit home

>>14837914
>A lot of them are actually quite fit
lol
A lot of Americans are quite fit.
A lot of Norferners are also quite fit.

>>14836042
>the white people who built everything they have
You mean the people who stole their land and made speaking their language illegal for a while?

>>14836019
Hey faggot, answer my fucking question. >>14839222

Lau Lau and poi is better than any american food

>>14841037
>Stole
Lmao. If you can't defend your land, you don't own it.

>>14841049
ok haole

>>14836029
rent free

>>14840427
You’re on a cooking board numbnuts

>>14840456
More like Captain Cooked amirite

Wish someone made a SPAM shaved ice and/or li hing mui shaved ice syrup...

Bump until I can take pics

>>14836029
Ok chud

>>14836019
We don't care about you chud

Got some pics. However, like the dunkass I am I left my camera on macro so these images are kind of bad

Firstly, the piece of pige.

And here's the pige after scoring.

Then, rubbed with liquid smoke and coarse salt. It looks like a lot, but almost all of the salt goes into the drippings and you only add some of those back to the shredded pork.

In the pan. I always use foil.

And here's a secret ingredient: green tea. Traditionally, kalua pig is wrapped in Ti leaves and that gives it a subtle grassy and sweet flavor as it cooks Some people sub banana leaves but I tried that last time and wasn't impressed with the results so now I'm trying this instead.

There isn't much in the pan, probably just a couple of tablespoons.

And here's the kalua pig, covered TIGHTLY. Seriously, you want this as air-tight as possible so the shoulder steams instead of roasts.

>>14831326
100% true, and it's really good.

And into the oven at 250F it goes. At two hours per pound, it should take four hours. When it's done and I cook the rest of my dinner I'll be back with more pics, should be about four hours from now. On the menu is Kalua pig, white rice, sauteed yu choy (experimental; if I don't like it I'll just cook up some cabbage instead), mac salad, green salad with miso dressing and lemon-pineapple haupia for dessert.

Thanks for reading my blog

>>14831252
Dude, i'm gonna type as sober as possible, that honestly looks fcking pathetic and digusting compared to my meal. and I'm being one hundred percent serious. Sorry we dont cook sht that was perviously in cans. you're a fuking joke dude, and im dead fuking serious. gert areal family that cooks good food, drinks beer and wine and winecoolers and has a good fuking time, and has a milliondollar house on the beach, im seriously.. dont eever potst your poverty dinner on these forums ever again bro.

>>14844807
>thinking a million dollars is a lot for a house
Lmao k

>>14841184
>he thinks that you have to enjoy food and cooking on this board
Sounds pretty soy to me.

>>14844749
yeah but what does it look like when it's done?

i can't make this shit for myself so i need you to show what it looks like so i can pretend i made it

>>14831252
Lol, are eggs ‘Hawaiian Cuisine?” They didn’t have chickens until white people arrived. Nor did they have spam or ketchup or rice. They mainly ate poi. You know how I feel about poi? You can flush it down the poilet
https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cuisine_of_Hawaii

>>14831252
Steal food ideas from japs and Kpop land + gravy = hawaiian

>>14844807
low iq post

>>14844986
>yeah but what does it look like when it's done?
Like the same piece of meat except cooked.

>i can't make this shit for myself so i need you to show what it looks like so i can pretend i made it.
You don't have an oven? Lmao.

UPDATE: The entire downstairs of my house now smells like smoked pork with the barest hint of green tea. Dis gon b gud in another 100 minutes or so.

Another update: while the yu choy is tasty, I'm going to stick with cabbage. T-50 until the pork comes out and then probably 15 more until dinner is served.

PORK TRUK JUST ARRIVE

The reveal.

And a close-up. Still has to set for a little bit before I tear into it, which is good because I forgot to start the rice.

PORK TRUK JUST ARRIVE

>>14846149
Post dinner faggot

The pork, shredded

The salad ingredients

The completed dinner

>>14846293
Looks great. Minus one point on the loser-forever bagged salad though.

>>14846293
Nice job anon looks great

>>14831252
Kona coffee is really good.

>>14846293
are you top or bottom tonight?

>>14846310
I used it as a nod to the typical salad you get in Japanese restaurants; I would have used mizuna and a ponzu vinaigrette.

>>14846317
Thanks. It's also really easy - the pork just sits in the oven, you can make the mac salad ahead of time, the rice is done in a cooker, the salad doesn't need any cooking, the soup is instant and the cabbage takes less than five minutes.

>>14846340
>tfw no big tiddy freckled redhead gf
I can't get the taste of freshly scrubbed milkers out of my mind.

Hawaiian food is pretty trashy, but it hits the spot and I'm very nostalgic for it

>>14846879
It's very much poorfag cuisine, yeah.

>>14836029
so what did your impotent seething about america add to the thread?

>>14846366
Sweaty tits are hotter plen

I made chef johns loco moco, and it was a lot of work for something kinda pointless

>>14831800
such a beautiful soul

>>14836019
Remind me again what country Hawaii is part of

>>14837929
fucking kill yourself

>>14831252
never had it

Hawaiian food is so good. for me its local boyz in corvallis oregon

>hawaiian
>""""""""cuisine"""""""

>>14831252
Hawaiian food looks tasty but it's just a mish-mash of whoever was colonizing it at the time (not an SJW by the way, they were literally colonized so shut tf up)

>>14831326
This. I feel the same way about Filipino and Korean food (just a rip off of Chinese cuisine Tbh).

>>14846293
your miso soup looks depressing. Is it a picture of it after you started drinking it?

>>14835908
do natives hate whites? is kill a haole day still going?

>>14831326
This is Reddit gold!

>>14848844
Any tits you can lick are great and sweaty ones are my second favorite but when a girl is fresh out of the shower and all you can taste is skin it's enough to make a grown man cry.

>>14849196
The only time Hawaii was ever colonized was by the austronesians. It was an independent kingdom before becoming a US territory and then a US state.

>>14849339
It was instant and extremely cheap and unfortunately I didn't have an appropriately sized bowl.

>>14831326
Nuggets of wisdom and insight like this are why I come to 4chan.

>>14831519
American pizza > Italian pizza

When I first went to Hawaii, I was surprised at how poor it was outside of the main tourist areas. Hawaiians are low-class and trashy, always talking about fighting other people over trivial shit, while they are fat and poor from their under-developed, tourism dependent economy. The food reflects the people, high carb, greasy processed meats, lack of technique, slop o shit on a plate.

>>14851288
Hawaii has nothing but tourism and the military.

>>14846293
Damn, that's absolute garbage.

>>14831326
I was once invited to a Hawaiian "restaraunt" in Oregon, and this is spot on.

>>14851288
So basically you went to Honolulu, and couldn't afford to stay anywhere other than the fucking ghetto in Honolulu. Congratulations, even paradise has shitty areas full of shitty people.

>>14831252
Fun fact, pineapples are not native to Hawaii, so anything "Hawaiian" with pineapple in it is likely not authentic Hawaiian food.

>>14831326
>le funny witty soijack screencap bait

>>14852971
he's not wrong though

>>14845864
What's that design on the center of the plate, it looks like you stole that plate from a hotel.

>>14852949
>no tomatoes in authentic italian food
>no potatoes in authentic irish food

>>14852949
We're not native to this galaxy but I call it my home

>>14853102
Lel. Knowing my grandmother I wouldn't be surprised (there are like three ashtrays from different Vegas casinos currently floating around her house) but that one is just a cheapo italian pasta bowl; in days of yore there existed a set of five but decades of regular use have whittled the count down to two.

>>14831252
I’m going to have Loco Moco for lunch later

>>14852281
Unless you are talking about Hawaii Kai, Honolulu is one big ass ghetto. Even Waikiki is bad after sun down.

>>14853114
true but pineapple on pizza and burgers were both invented in canada