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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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14420454 No.14420454 [Reply] [Original]

Hello. I lied to a girl and told her I've been honing my culinary skills these past few weeks as an excuse to invite her over for dinner. Restaurants are closed and I wanted to do something nice for her and maybe impress her.
But I can't cook shit. I can make eggs, use the oven, and use the stovetop.
Do you have any suggestions on foods that are easy to learn but seem impressive? Thanks guys.

>> No.14420484

Get a Stouffer’s lasagna (or better yet, a take and bake from Costco) and put it in your own pan. She’s just a dumb girl she’ll never know.

>> No.14420498
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14420498

>>14420454

>> No.14420601

>>14420454
fuck this guy >>14420484, just make a home made lasagna. lasagna is basically just food lego, the only way to fuck it up is to over/under cook it. sauce noodle sauce noodle sauce noodle.

>> No.14420640

>>14420454
Fuck this guy >>14420601, just make a pot noodle. Noodle is basically just food drinking, the only way to fuck it up is to not open the cup. slurp noodle slurp noodle slurp noodle.

>> No.14420659

>>14420454
Fuck this guy >>14420640, just put cheese on tortilla microwave for 30 seconds. Tortilla is basically just cheese, the only way to fuck it up is to not microwave for 30 seconds. cheese beep cheese beep

>> No.14420669

>>14420454
unless you're a spastic retard just follow a recipe for something that you think looks cool, anything goes, veal in tuna sauce, stuffed peppers/zucchini, mushroom risotto..., make it a couple times beforehand so you get a feeling of what it's like and you should be able to make it look presentable

>> No.14420693

Honestly, you COULD just cheat and claim it's your own when she asks. It's not like she has background knowledge of your previous cooking skills. Ask her if there's anything in particular she really likes and give it a shot, if you're feeling brave. Youtube can probably walk you through the process step by step. Give it a shot!

>> No.14420962

>>14420669
seconding risotto, bitches love risotto

make sure she's cool with mushrooms though

cook some diced bacon in a big soup pot, use the bacon fat to sear a couple of chicken breasts (get the nice ones that aren't pumped up huge with broth)(also they won't be fully cooked after their sear, so toss them in the oven), saute some mushrooms and onions in the fond (the brown stuff left on the bottom of the pot), add some garlic, maybe add some tomato paste if you feel like that sounds good, then add some arborrio rice and cook it for a bit. then just add hot chicken stock to the pot in stages.

time it so she comes over as you're grating the parm to put in the risotto. then talk to her as she watches you chiffonade some basil (just watch a video) to put in the risotto and slice up the chicken breast.

risotto in bowl, sliced chicken on top. get a side salad, bitches love side salad. oh and ask her as an afterthought if she wants more parm on top of the risotto (she will)

i guarantee that this will work if you are not an idiot.

>> No.14420977

yeah how are you going to pretend to have been working on improving cooking for a couple weeks

>> No.14421005

>>14420962
>risotto
>add hot chicken stock to the pot in stages
fucking am*ricans

>> No.14421012

>>14420962
>I guarantee that this will work if you are not an idiot
I've got some bad news for you anon...

>> No.14421030

>>14421005
you're right, i forgot the wine.

make it a nice one, op, and serve the rest of the bottle with dinner. make sure she knows that it's the same wine that's in the risotto

>> No.14422054

>>14421005
that's how I've been making risotto for as long as I can remember, and adding stock little by little is how risotto is traditionally prepared
t. Italian

>> No.14422109

>>14420454
Tonkatsu plated up all pretty. Japs electrify the panko bread for extra tastiness. You DO own a rice cooker right anon? Careful not to cut your fingers cutting up the cabbaged. She doesn't know anything about cooking herself right?

>> No.14422115

>>14420454
Steamed hams.

>> No.14422444

>>14422109
>You DO own a rice cooker right anon?
Nope. I usually just boil water on the stove and throw the rice in.

>> No.14422464

Fuck this guy >>14420659, just make a McChicken, the best fast food sandwich I even ask for extra McChicken sauce packets and the staff is so friendly and more than willing to oblige.

One time I asked for McChicken sauce packets and they gave me three. I said, "Wow, three for free!" and the nice friendly McDonald's worker laughed and said, "I'm going to call you 3-for-free!".

Now the staff greets me with "hey it's 3-for-free!" and ALWAYS give me three packets. It's such a fun and cool atmosphere at my local McDonald's restaurant, I go there at least 3 times a week for lunch and a large iced coffee with milk instead of cream, 1-2 times for breakfast on the weekend, and maybe once for dinner when I'm in a rush but want a great meal that is affordable, fast, and can match my daily nutritional needs.

I even dip my fries in McChicken sauce, it's delicious! What a great restaurant.

>> No.14423906

>>14420454
https://youtu.be/PAmctHjPAlQ