/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Put me in the screencap

>>14295867
That looks fine

>>14295956
fuck why do millennial do thise

>>14296018
lol imagine not being the same age as me

>>14296023
they are inexperienced. although odd that he said millennial instead of zoomer.

>>14295956
this honestly is the worst thing i've ever seen

>>14295852

>>14295956
I thought this was a dead toad from the thumbnail.

>>14295852

>>14295852

i wish i could spoiler this webm

>>14296263
I'm deeply saddened.

>>14296263

>>14296263
When I first started browsing 4chan years ago I'd see that webm in gore threads and think he was doing something really bad but I could never understand it or why it got lots of replies usually, now im alot older and actually have to buy my own shit, seeing that really saddens me, in fact it makes me sadder than seeing babys get brutally murdered in the same gore threads.

>>14296062
What is this?

>>14299196
This doesn't seem that bad, does anyone have the ingredients to try it?

>>14296908
My daughter.

>>14300165
Do you willingly eat shit?

>>14296263
meh, it was probably spoiled anyway.

>>14299196
An absolutely JACKED mate of mine makes a version of this with Red Bull instead of ginger ale and sucks the whole thing down before going to the gym.

He calls it 'Fizzy Lifting Drink'.

>>14296255
I've gotten this when I was kid and it's actually pretty good pizza

>>14300308
That's... really fucking clever.

>>14295962
im more upset about serving broccoli with burnt eggs and bacon.

>>14300308
>when you're at the gym and some jabroni starts floating into the ceiling again so you have to get the Gym Catchpoler to get them down

>>14295956
winner winner scrambled eggs dinner

>>14300308
Steal some and let us know how it tastes

>>14295956
Oh no.

>>14295962
That actually looks neat.

>>14299196
>Beef Fizz
I don't like where this is going and I haven't even read the recipe yet.

>>14300279
Hello, Dominoes? Yes, I'll have one cumplosion.

>>14301058
I had this in jail.

pineapple hot dog in a garlic bread with ketchup

>>14301262
What? It looks fine

>>14302327
that looks delicious

>>14295956
Weird looking Beef

>>14302321
How was it

>>14302712
The sandwich was fine, the forced anal sex was painful at first but more enjoyable as time passed.

>>14295896
Idiot

>>14300490
No it's not

>>14303527
How's it taste? Don't those stingers get in the way?

>>14303527

>>14296263
Chocolate milk is pure garbage
He did nothing wrong

>>14304388

>>14299196
>mystery space theater 3000.jpg

>>14296263
does this count as a war crime?

>>14296263
You monster. Why would you post this. Absolutely disgusting.

Time for another rousing round of, “Do Americans REALLY...?!?” Remember; the answer this time around is always “Yes, but only in settings like carnivals, county fairs, and the occasional gathering of food trucks,”.

We’re going to start this off with a 2009 classic; Deep Fried Butter. Yes, you read that correctly. Deep fried butter. Invented in Dallas, Texas by a man known as “Fried Jesus”, it’s prepared by taking frozen, battered butter, breading it, and deep frying it.

>>14304883
The result, I’m told, is something that tastes like a very sweet pancake with plenty of butter. It quickly became a staple of many Midwest state fairs, namely in Iowa, which is cited as being the first state to put deep fried butter on a stick in 2011.

Now, DFB need not be naked. It’s far more versatile than one might think. It’s commonly served with powdered sugar, a glaze, chocolate syrup, candied strawberries, cinnamon, honey, whipped cream, even bacon, sometimes all at the same time. This is to say nothing of all the savory permutations of the dish that exist. Pic related is one of the more decorated DFBs one can eat.

>>14302712
It wasn't that bad with the little bit of butter they gave us.

>>14295852
Not a food item but a weird encounter with my local McDonald's, the cashier must've had a bad day or something because he wouldn't quit riding my ass, this is roughly how the convo went:

>Hello, may I take your order?
Yup.
>....Okay, what would you like?
Yup.
>That's not an item on the menu.
Oh, my bad. Can I get a Quarter Pounder?
>Ok, is that all?
You know what they call that in France?
>Yeah dude, I've seen Pulp Fiction.
Oh....can I change my order?
>Sure
Can I get a McChicken? That's all.
>Alright, your total will be $1.06.
Oh man, all I have are 3 quarters, 2 nickels and a dime.
>So you're telling me you can't pay for your order?
Does ninety five cents equal one hundred and six cents?
>I thought you only had ninety.
I did, but I found a nickel in my other pocket.
>So you're still eleven cents short?
Eleven? I'm close enough, aren't I? Can't you just give it to me for ninety five?
>I'm afraid I can't do that.
I'm afraid you can. Take eleven cents from the register and put it into my hand.
>I can't steal from the store, sir.
Why not? No one will see you. You will get away with it, I guarantee it.
>I suppose, but I won't.
Why is that?
>I don't like your tone.
Then I'll just go to another restaurant.
>And pay with what, your ninety five cents?
No, my card.
>If you have a card, why didn't you pay with that in the first place?
Wanted to get rid of some change.
>We have a box you can put loose change in, it goes to charity.
I don't donate to charities.
>Why not?
I feel like they lie about where the money goes, and I want to get something for my money.
>You get to know you helped some kid eat.
Doesn't satisfy me.
>Well, if you want to get rid of some change, I guess you can give me the change and pay the rest with your card.
You can do that?
>Apparently.
Apparently what? Can you, or can you not?
>You can.
Then I will.
>Here's your McChicken, have a nice day.
Yup.

>>14304966
what?

>>14304966
Holy shit if I see you I'm going to harm you. Remember this.

>>14296263
>makes fatties seethe
based

>>14304966
kek, if this is accurate then you were way more of a fucking weirdo then he was.

>>14303527

>>14303527
This is clearly wasp soup, not bee. And i can see several flies there too

>>14304899
Based

>>14305203
Dude are you really that dense?

>>14305246
Nice

>>14304899
Do Americans really?

>>14307244
You don’t know the half of it. Just consider the following;

Deep fried cookie dough

An assortment of deep fried candybars

Deep fried cheesecake sticks, also known as cheesecake chimichangas, or chimicheesecakes

It’s a big fat trend to just pop whatever into a deep fryer. Deep fried Oreos? Yeah, sure.

Funnel cake burger

It’s a burger, but instead of buns, it has funnel cakes

This is called a Brown Butter Fried Banana and Nutella Sandwich.

>>14309078
Less heavy on the Nutella and that might be kinda ok if you only eat it once a year at most?

There’s also the Ramen Burger.

>>14303475
Yes, yes you are.

Let’s not forget the fruity pebbles shrimp on a stick. It won an award just last year.

With the advent of the deep fried Klondike bar, we end this segment of “Do Americans Really...?!?”

Join us next time when we explore proper Walmart etiquette

>>14309121
The white man took this from us.

>>14304899
Fried butter is unironically delicious

>>14304899
Shit I was living in Iowa when this was invented? I guess I'm honored over the stuff now/

>>14309125
bring back bullying

>>14300279
this is just an ordinary chicago deep dish pizza

>>14309125
the way he eats it at the end...
just
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

>>14304388
>>14304434
Kek

>>14309068
I would murder that thing right now

>>14309110
Thats sollys grille in Wisconsin, i work by that place I need to go try it

>>14309105
Every day, we stray further from God's light.

>>14296263

looks like mud

>>14303527
UMA

>>14295956
That's a frog

>>14296900

(you)

>>14309110

>>14295852
I'm not posting the other half.

>>14311266

that looks fire

Baby come back, any kind of fool could see
There was something in everything about you
Baby come back, you can blame it all on me
I was wrong, and I just can't live without you

>>14295852

>>14303527
Wasps. This is a wasp trap.
Top tier shitpost.

>>14311344
jesus christ lmao

>>14311353

>>14311266

>>14311357

>>14311266
I was here for that fucking thread

>>14304966
worked retail for 6 years and the only thing that pissed me off were retards that asked if theyt can short your drawer. like jump off a building you colossal cock platter

>>14311370

???????

faggots. give me some shit to save to my /ck/ folder

>>14311408

>>14311276
wtf that looks like marshmallow fluff

>>14311444
God in heaven is that all margarine?

>>14311453
You want hell? In the army here they ONLY serve margarine...
I started bringing my own butter

>>14302321
What were you in for?

>>14300279
king ass ripper is in the building

>>14304966
For some reason I imagine your voice to be nasally, high pitched, and unbearable to listen to for more than 5 seconds

>>14305246
Gotta get it out onto a tray first

>>14311252
Its just butter on a burger but I bet your fatass still eat chips and candy everyday.

>>14309113
lot of pickl lol

>>14311447

whats the white shit?

frosting? Ham cake?

you niggers need explainings

>>14311528
>chips and candy

literally never. i'm rather fond of fruit and veggies.

i have steak and tater tots in the oven right now. however.

>>14304966
What’s up Pat?

>>14311274
The entire supper for six sounds pretty bad

>>14309518
Well, this is what it looks like when you take a bite out of it sometimes

nigger

most y'all nigglers dint even into to food.

any culinary fags LGBT

i can slap circles around your dishes. and i don't eva broil. said some the fry, hover. but really. what one of us 4/4 goosk are supreme on the prep and shit>? i'ts barely worth it. hardly. all realt

>Insert E minir

oh. you hae a sauce? wine? red or white faggot? slap some butter. parm. then the oils. chase the venom. feel the power coursing through your viens. trust in me. for i well set you freee. in my life i will save make me pray. make me crave

>>14299196
for someone who actually wants to try this; what volume is a can?

i'll devfour. i empoer god's embrace. trust in me. for i will see. with a seroents kiss.

>>14300279
__ _________ ______..?

>>14311627

7 gallons

>>14311535
lurkmoar

>>14311535
Creme cheese? If it is then at least it would be edible

>>14311619
u wot m8?

>>14311631
Not on the regular, no

>>14311513
Nice

>>14311673
Nu slutar du upp med det där.

>>14311535
>oh, you care about the environment?!
>then why are you eating FOOD when people are starving in other countries?!

conservatives are so retarded

>>14304966
god you're a faggot

>>14309117
cute girl but what the fuck is her problem.

>>14311344
This is hilarious

>>14311768
Det är inget som helst fel på gädda med ketchup

>>14311084
DELICIA

>>14311768
får en norrländsk neger inte avnjuta sin sashimi och bärs i fred? hatare kommer hata

>>14304966
>yeah dude I've seen pulp fiction

>>14295852

>>14299196
This reminds me of when I sodastreamed beef bullion

>>14295956
So if you don't put regular scrambled egg spices on this, isn't it basically some kind of omelette/pancake thing? Like, if you'd add milk and flour you'd have regular pancakes. I can see this not tasting that bad if you don't use salt, pepper and herbs.

>>14311370
Tell me more. Was it on /ck/?

>>14312444
God I hate scandi fags who bring their mongrel tongue online

>>14309059
cheesychanga

My grandmother does this dessert with the green part of watermelon and just loves to serve it to the family. I eat it because i love her very much, she is a really great cook, but this is definitely the worst dish she makes.

>>14313200
whats in it?

my grandparents and parents still make watermelon rind soup

Usually after we ate the red part of the watermelon they would cut off the rind and cut up the white part of the watermelon to make a basic soup or stir fry it

it was like wintermelon

>>14313209
Basically she cooks it with sugar, clove and cinnamon.

>>14313217
that sounds pretty tasty gonna try it next time

thanks

>>14311466
The true redpill that cooklets will never understand: butter is disgusting, sour ass. Margarine is, has always been and shall always be INFINITELY better, because its flavor is subtle and doesn't get in the fucking way of your cooking. Butter ALWAYS makes anything you add it to sour as hell, most "people" simply can't taste this because their tongues are broken.

>>14300279
One slop a shit, please

>>14309129
Tbh id definitely eat that once a year on a hot day. Would you try any of the pictures that you posted anon?

>>14313159

>>14305246
"Pain" in french is bread. Hamburger bun is thus "pain hamburger".

https://youtu.be/ZqB1kcHMe3Q

>>14313413
>Hmmm, eggs in sausage sounds a bit odd but I suppose it could wor-
>Oh jesus christ
>Oh no
>Oh god he's eating it

>>14313413
What the actual fuck

>>14313344
Your butter tastes sour? Either you're eating rancid butter or your taste buds are fucked.

>>14313550
ALL butter tastes sour. Most "people" simply have dysfunctional tongues.

>>14313568
I should caveat this. All butter in america tastes sour. I don't know if it's like this in other countries, but going by what I know of human nature, I'd wager it tastes like this everywhere and people are just too sloppy of bitches to even notice.

>>14312318
>>14312444

Jävla okultiverade fjällnegrer. Så här går det när det finns för mycket tungmetaller från gruvdriften i dricksvattnet.

>>14313577
What a monkey, imagine thinking flavored vegetable oil is better then animal fats.

>>14313703
Now re-read your dumbass post and actually examine it. Why would animal fats necessarily be "gooder" than plant fats? There's no logic in your comment. God damn zoomers are fucking retarded.

>>14295852
>Heart Healthy
disgusting

>>14313708
Because animal products are generally tastier then plant products.

I made this last night

>>14313741
In your retarded opinion.

>>14313761
Ah, my favorite, incorrectly prepared ramen with chopped labia.

>>14313777
I'm sorry you're too poor to afford butter anon, but that doesn't automatically make margerine better.

>>14313681
Käften, sockerbetsblatte.

>>14311665
fucking gross

>>14313568
If butter tastes full and creamy to most everyone, but sour to just you, wouldn't that make YOU the one with the dysfunctional tongue?

>>14314083
No. Most humans support destroying all life on the planet. Humans are a cancer.

>>14313761
Are those dates. also worth mentioning is that flavor packet hanging ominously between the pot and burner

>>14314146
It's mashed kidney beans. I was ask high as fuck when I did that. I call it Polish Stew

>>14313344
get new butter schizo

>>14311266
>>14311360
Forbidden love

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cnhhGk_ALeg

>>14311478
Shitposting

>>14313392
I didn't know we had a genius on this board.

>>14296263
Chocolate milk lives matter

>>14311360
hot

>>14311478
jaywalking

>>14299196
Sounds like something Doc from the Venture Brothers would make.

>>14314963
>Venture Brothers
immediately dropped

>>14313366
Well, I’d be lying if I said I didn’t want to eat most of those. I, too, am an American, after all. I seem to recall having some deep fried cheesecake once upon a time, which was flaky on the outside but melted away in your mouth on the inside.

I’d definitely have deep fried butter, just to try it, simply because common sense dictates that would be a horrible idea if I would like living past 35. It must be good, right? It’s gotta be if no one there even bats an eye.

>>14311248
if thats a potted meat cake, that's a lotta lips and assholes on one dish

>>14311370
same

>>14311276
ive done that to drunk retards who drive thru at 2am with 6 orders and everything is non-standard.

>>14311313
Cthunksgiving

>>14304966
>Does ninety five cents equal one hundred and six cents?
>>I thought you only had ninety.
>I did, but I found a nickel in my other pocket.

>>14309111
Not gonna lie. That looks pretty good.

>>14309100
>that fucking filename
Go to bed, Mandelore.

>>14304966
Looks lame in writing, but with the right performers it could be a decent skit.

>>14305412
Holy shit, that's a compelling argument.
There's even other points in favor of it:
>Bees get everyone involved, no bystander apathy in your moment of need when everyone's getting stung
>Bees are legal
>We need more bees anyways
The list goes on...

>>14305595
???????????????????????????

>>14304883
The deep fried jello was probably the coolest food I have had at the Texas State fair. They figured out how to have that jello still stay simi solid after being fried. Most of the fried gimmicks are ok. Some of the gimmick food is shit. Oreo beer, fucking bad. Best food at the state fair is Fletchers corny dog.

>>14296263
MOOOOOOOOOOOODS

>>14311478
Shitwalking

>>14311461
ah yes the traditional russian new years' demi-corpse

>>14295867
When I saw this:
>Macaroni with sausage
Not too bad
>Macaroni with beans
Probably still edible
>Fudged fries and beans
No

>>14304899
Why I can see this being served with icecream?
Haven't laughed in a while as well as in this thread

>>14311360

>>14297749
Fucking kek, I can imagine someone trying to eat it like this

>>14311478
jayposting

>>14311360
AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

"Spanish tortilla"

>>14317413
That doesn't look edible

>>14317439
could use more egg and not be over cooked but i dont see that much wrong with it desu
tortilla is a pretty boring food to begin with

>>14309121
>not using a lemon piglet

>>14317537

>pizza

>>14317619
reminds me of my childhood

>>14311990
it's because she discarded the crust

>>14296263
Good, he's obviously making a positive impact for his health.

>>14301058
This is Andy's log isn't it?

>>14305412
That's genious, to an extent.
The bee's will probably-likely suffocate because either there are no holes or there are not enough holes, the idea could work if you some kind of specialized jar full of bee's.

>>14311360
I cannot unsee this.

>>14309100
what a waste of food for some lame edgy comedy

>>14309110
Is that butter?

>>14317547
Lesbian bestiality?

>>14313777
>In your retarded opinion.
That is actually quite a popular opinion.

>>14315428
Bet you're real proud of that, McFaggot.

>>14300308
Isn't beef broth really just salt and no protein?

>>14300308
BURP YOU SILLY ASS BURP OR YOU'LL NEVER COME DOWN AGAIN!

>>14304966
Never post on this board again.

>>14309100
I made this dough but I am not its baker.

>>14311264
That file name

I once went to Acadia (the french speaking part of New Bruinswick) and ended up in a local restaurant which servec "Chocolate Spaghetti" in the desert menu.

While this may sound pretty cursed, it was actually really good. I don't exactly know the whole process, but it's fresh-made chocolate spaghetti, served cold, with a filet of hot fudge sauce, ice cream, and brownies bits. It sounds weird because we're used to the concept of salty, savory pasta, but I assure you it's great.

>>14304966

>>14311360
KEK

>>14311360
Did someone creampie that rabbit?

>>14295852
I’d low key try that on a cold day

>>14309068
this cured my ED

>>14309100
>chopped rhubarb
>throws in leaves

>>14320157
those are poison right?

british food

>>14309111
I'd honestly try it, people already pair sweet sauces with shrimp, this is kinda degenerate but still the same sort of profile

>>14320245
That looks fucking delicious ngl

What's in the.. Curry?

>>14320274
Its dinty moore beef stew. I'm sad I can recognize that shit from visuals alone because it is awful

>>14320379
Dinty must be different in the UK. Here it's big chunks of beef, not ground beef

>>14313392

>>14296263

Fuck

>>14305246

>tfw you bought mres and the exact same tray in Amazon.

To be honest many of mres in my box are really good.

>>14311337

Sushi pizza isn't supposed to be cooked. Only the base crust is the rest is supposed to be cold and fresh. I've had a few good ones. This is just horrible.

>>14309121
in a way this seems like a good idea boiling the turkey in it's own juices, even a lemon too, but the same effect could've been done in a deep pot.

>>14314963
oh god Doc's Tomato and Coke vodka drink

>>14311241
Can see that working

>>14303527
this is the future

>>14296900
Wow congratulations! You're now 13 and still can't spell for shit you absolute mongoloid.

>>14314963
>>14320997

RED MOCHO KOOLER RECIPE

Ingredients:
Kahlúa
Hershey’s Syrup
Dash of red Kool-Aid

Preparation:
Mix Kahlúa and Hershey’s Syrup together till thick.
Sprinkle with a dash of red Kool-Aid.
Garnish with fruit and a cocktail umbrella.
Serve chilled.

>>14318189
Yes to make fatties like you seethe

>>14311619
>y'all
Stopped reading

>>14296263
As a lack toes inolerant myself, this image makes me fuckin happy

>>14300490
How so?

>>14309105
whether not not this was a joke, whoever made this deserves to be shot

>>14296263
>premixed
Nothing of value was lost

>>14302327
Honestly the ketchup is the worst part otherwise pretty interesting synergy. It's basically a reconstructed pineapple pork pizza with no cheeze

>>14304883
>>14304899
The name of the thread is cursed foods, not blessed foods

>>14311627
Cans are 12 oz

>>14309110
The cherry on top of the shit cake is that despite using all that butter this bitch still didn't brush the tops of the buns

>>14316070
You fold it in half, take the bite out of the folded section, then unfold it.

>>14309100
oh look a woman got exposed to edgy comedy and tried to make something, wasting way too much food in the process

>>14304966
based

>>14313413
When he runs the jellybeans through it's pure fucking nightmare fuel

>>14309113
needs a little more lettuce and perhaps a bit less mustard

>>14314095
Says the guy buying margarine

>>14314773
>>14320715
Is he wrong?

I've spent the last hour looking it up on my own, and I think he is right that pain in French is bread. I can't of any other good reason for implying he is a retard, since his post is clearly not low-quality or in bad faith, and so does not benefit from mocking and disapproval from others unless it is in bad faith to insult people who do not shitpost to the same degree.

>>14321691
Obvious trolling.

>>14309157
Do you want it back?

>>14321725
you wouldn't want to have a buttery bun, your hands would get all oily.