/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>14242596
Try eating anything with a pulse. Bats even. Even female aborted babies and oil from the sewers.

>>14242596
Share a menu and I will recommend things

>>14242596
chinese cuisine is pretty broad. pick a specific type.

>>14242596
I don't remember the name but its Gai something or starts with a G. It's sticky rice with chicken and mustard sauce, super fucking delicious.

For me it is orange chicken and beef lo mein

>>14242596
Ask the staff for recommendations

>>14242750
*deadpan asian stare*

>>14242762
What
You
Rike
Eat??

>>14242738
You're thinking of Lo Mai Gai?

>>14242779
Ur pussy. What a green card or no?

>>14242596
Authentic chinese dim sum is the shit

>went to Beijing for a month to visit a buddy
>go eat at this local place down the street from his apartment
>they served beer on ice
Weirdly enough that was the one thing about chinese cuisine that bugged me. There was this awesome vendor though practically outside his house that made the best egg thing though.

>>14242952
perfect combination of carbs, fats, and protein.

Fucking sugar ass refined flour fluffy bums encapsulating sugar brazed fatty pork. Sea food finely minced and overflowing with amino acid rich juices. Refined rice flour made into gelatin, melts in mouth, fried in pork fat. Ribs steamed to a gelatinous mess filling the taste buds.

All without the need of using heavy spices, letting the ingredients speaking for themselves. Now that is civilized food.

i love snow pea greens. bright green, very light garlic sauce, just a hint of flavor. also chinese broccoli, much better texture than western broccoli. i keep dreaming about ma po tofu. so i would try that.

China has this chain place called Flying Noodle.
Their fucking beef udon still haunts me to this day, fuck I wish I could have udon that good again.

>>14242596
This is now about the sixth thread involving fucking gook 'cooking'. There is definitely some kind of CCP troll operating on this board trying to encourage discussion of their filthy 'culture' in order to normalize it again.

Fuck off.

>>14242952
>authentic
>not bamboo
no.

>>14242952
Most of those dim sum are frozen, I fucking see the same ones at every asian restaurant I visit.

>>14242596
Can't go wrong with cat/bat/baby rat breaded and fried to perfection in last night's freshly filtered gutter oil.

>>14243001
> civilized
This about the fucking scum that torture and eat dogs and cats in their millions every year, and are responsible for a global pandemic that's killed tens of thousands because of their savage scum appetites. You ain't 'civilized', Chang. Fuck off.

>>14242952
Pig fucking disgusting. The absolute state of this scum's 'food'.

>>14243308
What I remember as chinese food growing up as a young kid in Hong Kong

>turtle/shark fin soup
>fried chicken feet
>pig uterus noodles
>fried rice with pork knuckle gristle
>unidentifed fish balls on a stick
>boiled dog meat
>one time, monkey brains

Americans have no idea how bad it really is. No one in china knows what the fuck beef and broccoli is or sweet and sour pork. Chinese food is disgusting. Literally the worst parts to eat of any animal. Makes sense because chinks are the race of humans closest to animals. They make disgusting noises when they eat, slurp everything, men in the streets lift their fucking wife beaters over their sweaty stomachs while laughing and chewing with their mouths full of food. Like what kind of idiot decided 2 sticks is the most practical way to eat grains of fucking rice. Starving Nigerians who eat grass have a better diet than the average chinese.

>>14242596

Fried rockfish

Sizzle rice soup

>>14242596
sum yung guy

>>14242596
cuttlefish with cashews and dried chili. Ask for the yam ring if they make it in-house
thank me later

Roast duck or Mapo Tofu.
Greatest of all Chinese dishes.

>>14244064
>thank me later
SUCK MY DICK

>>14243527
Lol imagine being filtered by chopsticks.

>>14242596
Get anything made with rice noodles

>>14244248
>replying to pasta

>>14244140
cope and seethe

>>14243527
This. Even for shitty Chang 'cuisine' otherwise, Hong Kong is on a whole other level of fucking disgusting. Everything's fucking congee, live animals, or animals boiled, and always the most disgusting parts.

Fucking savages. Pure filth when it come to how they 'eat'.

-Clams with black bean sauce
-Lobster with ginger and scallion
-Salt & pepper calamari
-Duck. The Chinese love it and know how to make it absolutely delicious

>>14243001
>perfect combination of carbs, fats, and protein.
Shut the fuck up loser

Fried Uyghur skin

>>14244548
People actually eat food and not the latest corporate pink slime and cured pig anus

>>14244758
Americans have been locking up latinos at the border for god knows what nefarious black magic so now they have to invent another lie about China

>>14242596
啤酒鸭

>>14242596
biangbiang noodles, dandan noodles

>>14244769
> everyone is lying about China!!
Nobody is buying this bullshit anymore, Chang. Get fucked with your CCP propaganda.

小妞阴道

>>14244763
> food
> Actually eats dogs and cats tortured and skinned alive.
Fuck off, sub-human filth.

>>14245135
Keep eating your roadkill Cletus.

reported and saged 2

dumplings with soup inside. called "shaolum bao" or something

>>14245135
>he’s never eaten dog
Don’t knock it til you try it pal

>>14247226
Unidentified meat in dumplings are amazing!
They usually minced up a lot of parts which are normally not be eaten, byproducts that no sane person would eat after they take a look at it, made them into some beautiful dumplings, for those baka gaijin who swear they would not eat animal organs.
You would believe that it tasted so amazing, they can sell food with meat waste, win win !

>>14242942
I'm not your guy, friend.

Help a new fag. I like beef and broccoli and breaded sweet and sour chicken. What else should I try? I want to stop getting general tso because I feel like a retard.

>>14242952
SHOUT OUT TO ASIAN GIRLS
LET THE LIGHTS DIM SUM

>>14248048
Try general tso the vegan.

>>14243527
Jesus, no wonder why so many diseases come out of China. it's funny how places like India and the Phillipines get a rep for being dirty places (and by and large, they are), and yet, China is the country that caused the pandemic.

>>14243001
>letting the ingredients speaking for themselves
Oh, fuck off, spicelet. Herbs and spices enhance the flavor of any dish they are present. Try eating a piece of chicken or bread without herbs and spices. Stop justifying bland food.

>>14248048
pepper steak and onions
hunan beef
chicken chow fun

fuck it, just try anything on a menu that doesnt sound like your regular stuff.

>>14248087
spices have always been about
1- preservation
2- masking old meat.

>>14248111

>>14248135
>buy chinese food
>pay only $5 for a whole bucket of slop
>"oh man its so good"
>its just covered in syrup, oil and the ol' anti-shit-flavor powder
>surprised as worms eat their way out of your asshole from the whole two pennies they paid for their ingredients.

eat a bat!

>>14249075
Do Whites really?

蚂蚁上树

>>14248160
cope and seethe

>>14249148
ching chong pong hong. chang.

水煮魚 - Shui zhu yu
Also called sichuan fish slices in spicy sauce.
The most important flavor in sichuan food is the unique peppercorn, which is a numbing flavor (not the same as hot spicy peppers). So even though it looks insanely red hot, it's fine if you eat with rice (I'm white with low spice tolerance)

You can usually choose whole fish or fish fillets, but if you don't want to deal with bones and fish heads go with the fillets.

>>14252053
Sichuanese cuisine is overrate in my opinion. I've been to the heart of Sichuan to cities like Chengdu and Guang'an and the dishes are oily as fuck and bland. They seem to think that spiciness on par with actual flavours such as sweet and salty when in reality, spiciness is only there to compliment the flavour.
Shaanxi cuisine is where it's at. I'd take Liangpi over tripe in a hotpot any day.

>>14248079
That's pasta dumb newfag.

>>14252146
I've never been to China so my only experience is from living in a US city with tons of immigrants. Maybe only the good dishes get filtered through to restaurants here, because I've had some 紅油抄手 that might be my favorite thing I've ever eaten. (Wontons in spicy sauce)

fish head stew, crispy fried eel, chicken feet, grilled dog, and wuhan bat soup

>>14242596
Chink here. Stir fry udon, mapo tofu, dan dan/zha jiang noodle, xiao long bao (it's a small meat bun) are usually good, especially for the gaijin palate. Beef fried rice is always good in any non shit place. Giant meatballs if they have it (I think most chinese places that aren't deli style don't) and try whatever dish is just eggplant and meat without any other gimmicks. These are my go tos as well.

>>14247226
xiaolongbao
little dragon "bao"(or wrap)
always thought it was a cute name

>>14253855
The middle word "long" is 籠 and not 龍, it's based on the same character and pronounced the same, but actually means basket. small basket bun

>>14242596
Big sroppa shit

>>14253851
This is peak ESL.

>>14253011
I remember ck had a cooking contest years ago (didn't lurk for years just came back maybe it's still up). There was one poster who won it or something, she had a vertical recipe for dumplings in spicy (ma-la) oil. Made it once and it was amazing, I wish I still had it. Maybe someone here can post it if they know what I'm talking about

Try dapanji

>>14253855
>xiaolongbao
Syau Lung Bau*

>It's always sichuan or southern Chinese food
No one else had northern Chinese food? Really?

>>14242596

Is it true that General Tso Chicken is not a recipe eaten much at all by people in China, in any of its regions? Where does it really come from, then, and when?

>>14257423
t. retard

>>14242596
How you finna order if the menu is in chinese?

I only eat Chinese food these days.

Depending on the type of place and what kind of Chinese it is (as there are a billion gooks in China) you will get a lot of variety.
There's also the fusion/lowai versions you see that overseas Chinese go for sometimes too.

Sichuan:
One of the most popular but also the most bastardized of Chinese cuisines, the main feature is Sichuan peppercorn which is mixed with chilli to give "mala" which is a spicy and numbing flavour. If you get sichuan and the chefs are cantonese expect it to be way to numbing but not spicy enough. Sichuan and chongqing are the hot pot capitols of China and when they say spicy they mean it.

Cantonese food is much lighter with smaller dishes, more steaming and seafood (especially shellfish)
Yunanese food tends to be fairly spicy with a lot of grilled vegetables as well as noodle dishes.
Tibetans for some reason don't get many spices except Chilli- but have a very strange variety of dried cheeses, butter in tea, grilled fat, gruels. Shit is wierd.
Shanghai is regarded as the dumpling capitol but is also a major center for fine dining (even compared to other mega-cities)
The further north you go the more pickles you get as a rule, and there are hundreds.
>>14257423
It's a real recipie- but it's just commonly bastardized in Chinese-western places as a inbred kind of honey-soy chicken.
>>14256771
>correcting people
>but even using pinyin
kek
>>14256691
Red oil is a staple condiment and there are many recipes, like many oils you need to keep it in the jar a while to be good instead of something you just throw together before cooking.
>>14253851
>chink here
You smell of white monkey teacher

>>14242596
Shark fin soup

Cheong fun, or rolled/intestine noodle.
It's just a flat sheet of rice noodle which you steam and roll full of usually shrimp if you're in the south- but I've also seen it down with beef (wouldn't recommend)

Takes literally ten minutes and is great for eloquently disposing of leftovers.
Throw some greens in on top of it after 5 minutes and have a full meal

>>14242712
The kind Chinese people eat, retard.

I heard zhejiang food has a lot of seafood and sweetness, and food from shandong is also very seafood oriented. correct me if im wrong chinese anons

>>14242596
Flame roasted dog, live baby mice, and of course bat soup is very popular right now.

Common street grill.
often marinated then grilled while you drink Tsingtao beer.
Unusual ones you might see include lotus root, chicken heart, quail eggs, whole garlic, marinaded tofu.
Best I ever had was south of ping'an in south/central china

>>14243527
No, Australian Abo's are the closest to being wild animals, they still have gorilla faces.

Classic mapu tafo.
Typically served with no ginger and way too much MSG in the west because they use a packet sauce.

Curiously enough I encountered a
RARE
A
R
E
version in Mynamar where whole green onion and mung bean (shan) tofu was used instead of soya bean tofu and the sauce had tomato.
Tibet also produces a whole bunch of wierd faux meat made from tofu that's been textured as you would motzarella

>>14260590
fun fact: aborigines on taiwan are the abbos of china; they have the rape and alcohol problems just like their australian compatriots

>>14260602
Yea but they cute though.

>>14242596
> be me
> 18
> last week
>parents are heading off to the cottage but i'm staying home because of job
> brother is the last one to leave
> reassure him that everything is gonna be alright and theirs nothing to worry about
> brother nods head and drives off
> finally get the house to myself
> fuckyeh.jpg
> get the rumbbles
> open fridge
> food.exe had stopped working
> open freezer
> find a small chicken pot pie that i can nuke
> throw pie into microwave, place plastic cover on top to prevent explosion, and press pie
> wait five minutes
> remember that fridge is empty and friends are coming over for burgers tomorrow
> ohshit.jpg
> hop on bike and ride to the grocery store that's close by
> lock up bike so niggers don't steal it
> step inside grocery store
> grab ground beef, burger buns, a couple drinks, can of peaches, and twinkies
> pay for shit and leave
> go outside and not a single nigger has stolen it
> so close to home and the front weal is fucking up
> flip bike upside down and realize the tire wasn't screwed on right
> fix problem and continue ride home
> step inside house and see smoke coming out of the microwave
> ohshit.jpg
> turn microwave off
> button doesn't work so pried it open with butter knife
> plate was so fucking hot that i got a blister
> grab oven mitts and take the fucking Chernobyl mess outside to spray with hose
> take off the cum looking melted plastic off plate with ease
> chicken pot pie was too destructing to eat so gave it to my pet raccoon
> realize i almost burnt down the house
> spend the rest of the night starving and covering up everything so parents don't beat the shit out at me
> cover up success
> parents come home two days later and not suspect a thing
> am i retarded?

>>14260706
No one's going to read all that.

>>14260706
>18
We all know that's not true. Good luck with your ban, underage faggot.

>>14260995
But her parents went to the cottage without her! She reassured her brother everything would be fine! She opened the fridge first! Don't you understand how important all these small details are to the story?

>>14260706
Is this the /ck/ equivalent to the "dad told my sister it wouldn't last" copy pasta on /b/?

>>14242952
I hated breakfast in China. Always went to a fancy dimsum (dianxin if you were in Beijing like I was) and it always would have chicken feet or eyes or shit like offal in the dimsum. The best breakfast I had was either porridge or leftover bao buns with fried meat and a vinegar sauce. Chinese food is amazing with vegetables though. I think that every meal I ate had some amazing vegetable side dish

>>14242596
har gow is pretty good
shumai as well

>>14260560
>shark fin soup
this but unironically
I always laugh at the gweilos going out of their way to pretend it's the same as any other soup

>>14252146
I agree, Sichuan cuisine is a little too "one note". It's good but it's hardly something you can eat regularly.

And it gets boring quickly.

>>14242596
hamburger

>>14253011
>>14252053
I'm a big fan of Sichuan and regularly eat both of these dishes at a local restaurant. >dumplings
>mapo tofu
>twice cooked pork
>Singapore noodles
>dan dan noodles
>green onion pancake
>eggplant in garlic sauce
Not sure if every one of these is considered a Sichuan chinese dish but I love them, with steamed white rice of course

>>14242596
batsoup

>>14242596
General Tso's Chicken

>>14262737
Also this cold appetizer called sliced beef and mow (mao?) which is beef tendon is another favorite

>>14244061
I only like the cream

>>14242596
Wife just made mapo tofu. You should try it OP

>>14242952
>I'MMMMMM GONNA 喊叫吃吃吃吃吃吃吃吃吃

>>14262748
yep, mao
mao is the bomb
every ch*nese would agree

>>14242596
There CAN be a whole secret (separate) "chinese menu" just for the chinese patrons, with things you don't see on the other menus. Ask if there is another menu. At times, there are chinese restaurants who actually have a slightly different asian nationality chef, like a married owner couple who are really from Laos or Vietnam (ask, always ask where they are from and their favorites or what the chef makes for them), and those comfy items are made daily for staff and there is indeed a second menu for that reason. Are they taiwanese, then get their ramen for the best stock.
Look for items such as frog legs, preserved mustard greens or pickled vegetables in the stir fry, more salt n pepper items, walnut sauce, or black bean sauced items, more duck, more of the rubbery kind of special meat sausage or fish balls, whole fish deep fried, seafood samplers, some of the more fancy seafood underappreciated like soft shell crab mysteriously missing from the other menu. They aren't going to serve it to people who might spit it out or complain about shells. There will be more soups, like chicken corn, or fish cheeks and things scary to some diners. Is there something out of place unusual added to the menu you're scratching your head about? Ask why its there (chef fave).

I look for very labor intensive items like homemade scallion cakes, special dumplings or stuffed steamed buns or shumai and "special wonton" soups filled with 40 ingredients. Mushrooms that are hard to find for me. Soft homemade egg noodles. Look at their veggies and be willing to order (ie pay for one), there can be sauteed expensive mixed vegetables that include something rare they source like the yard long beans, wood ear, taro, crisp baby bok choy, eggplants,bitter melon, ie the good stuff they don't use as garnish in meat.
Try Chicken wings, mushroom or pork egg foo young at least once to judge the cook that way.
Summer?
Hainanese chicken
cold sesame noodles

>>14242596
dog fried rice

>>14264746
nice copypasta

>>14242596
Pangolin and bat wonton soup
Shark fin soup
Snake juice

chicken feet. I will never forget how many bones those little shits have.

the most authentic chinese food that you can eat is salt in a spoon.

>>14265360
?

>>14244252
bingo

>go to town Chinese place
>order chicken wings and fried rice
>go to authentic Chinese place
>ask for chicken wings and fried rice
>get a weird look
>get up and leave because I wanted chicken wings and fried rice

>>14266567
based retard

>>14247643
Hes not your friend, buddy

>>14266567

dont forget the pizza

>>14267221
are you the dude that actually gets the pizza or tendies at chinese buffets?

>>14261171
it is now

>>14264746
>>14264849
maybe but the secret menu is real. had a chinese buffet around and last time i went, a group of chinese girls came in and sat down. none went to the buffet. soon, a waitress came with some bowls and plates and then one huge bowl sat in the middle of the table. they all started dipping out of it into their bowls. you could tell there were some large bony chunks of something (duck?) in there. always wanted to try it but it shutdown because of covid bs.

i'm glad our long time local chinese takeout is owned and run by actual chinese. ive seen chinese buffets and such come and go but this place has been around for as long as i can remember. damn good food. the only other takeout is panda express. never tried it.

>>14267712
Panda Express is dumb Americanized Chinese food, but it's still reliable.
>Sweet Fire Chicken
>Honey Walnut Shrimp
>Super Greens (because fuck more carbs)

>>14267744
Sure thing, fatty

Some of the best chinese food I've had was from a russian-owned chinese place.

>>14242710
are you chinese?

rec me the best shit on this menu for Zhongwuo-ren (boiled frog/pig feet/etc) IDGAF just as long as it's a pleb filter for Meiguo casuals
https://www.sichuanimpressions.com/menu-1

>>14244769
>latino illegal immigrants detained crossing the border = chinese citizens being sent to reeducation camps where chinese men are made to share beds with Uyghur women to make them have chinese kids
kys off chang.
Tiananmen Square protests of 1989 天安門大屠殺 The Tiananmen Square Massacre 反右派鬥爭 The Anti-Rightist Struggle

>>14269651
>actually believing the Xinjiang concentration camp meme
itsallsotiresome.jpeg
https://gowans.blog/2020/01/01/washingtons-xinjiang-smear/

>>14256826
Found a north western restaurant while walking before the outbreak, they had interesting potato noodles.
Hope the place is still open

Big sroppa shit

>>14267692
It's not copypasta.

My grandparents went to the very best, ie one of the top ranked Cardiologists in the country. That's how they rolled, only the best for everything. My grandparents often took my parents out as a treat with us grandkids just to be sweet, and to be honest, probably just to pick up a check occasionally as a treat to their budgets.
Their really personable and nice doctor just happened to be a chinese expat in the US, a university kind of physician with a big family. He's the guy that referred us to his favorite chinese restaurant, and the fact that there is a 2nd "chinese" menu at most real Chinese restaurants that had the Hong Kong style, Cantonese and other familiar American favorites in Chinese food on the normal menu and more scary family meal items on the chinese menu. We already knew ordering special #5 was stupid, and we often already ordered family style and shared at the whole table many items.
We often randomly saw the doctor and his very nice family there if we went out on a Friday night. For more than 25 years, my parents would cycle this restaurant into the takeout kind of lazy weekend meal and I'd see them eating in there during pickups and wave. He knew we loved it as much as he did and he started it all. Haha.
My next education on loving chinese food, as a youth, oddly enough, was Jeff Smith Frugal Gourmet. I was making proper gingery chinese chicken stock with pieces and parts in a pressure cooker, leaving out the parsley, celery, and things in american broth to make it more traditional from Frugal Gourmet Cooks Three Ancient Cuisines. Here's a link to two videos of his soup and his infectious curiosity:
RIP Jeff *sniff*

https://youtu.be/jZKcXJoFux0
https://youtu.be/5Mpvd8wqeZ0

Orange Chicken

My family are chinese and we ate crab noodles, roast duck, sil yuk and shark fin soup when going out to restaurants, otherwise just standard yum cha stuff.
I don't understand any chinese and my family is cantonese so probably clueless.

>>14267395
Tendies can be used to soak up extra sauce. The pizza is just for super picky eaters who come there if it's a family outing, literally the only people I can think of who'd actually eat it are little kids and autists.

>>14269633
Spicy wontons, boiled fish in chili sauce, ma-po tofus. The whole menu looks pretty legit.

Even if you get the kung pao chicken, the taste is a lot different from a legit chinese restaurant compared to the thick brown sauce waiguoren would use. Though at a couple shops they've asked me zhongshi/meishi so you gotta be careful

For me, it's dog fried in gutter oil.

>>14271041
>>>REDDIT

bamp

>>14271035
redpill me on the Big Mouth Ginger Frog of Zigong
https://www.sichuanimpressions.com/menus-2

I like cantonese food

>>14252053
I had something like this at a restaurant that had a pic of Anthony Bourdain with the owner on the wall. It really does numb your face. But after a few spoons you get used to it and it's really delicious.

>>14248108
Best advice right here. I started ordering random dishes from a locally owned non chain Chinese place and and 9 times out of 10
I am happy with what I ordered.