/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>14144527
I would.

>>14144527
Yes

>>14144527
>you wouldn't download a deer

>>14144527
you betcha

>>14144527
I've had a hunter buddy cook up deer burgers and you're pretty tasty.

>>14144527
i would first do something else but then i would eat you, yes.

maybe when you get a like more meat on you

>>14144527
not yet my boy, you must grow and be big and strong and more edible.

>>14144527
I shot a baby deer once, well not a baby, he was a young spike, so probably just under a year old, a teenager of deer. Fucking hell was he tender. Probably some of the best meat I've ever eaten.

>>14144541
Canadian spotted.

>>14144527
no, im a friend to the animals

>>14144527
i would smash your head in with a shovel, yes

deers have no souls thats why their eyes are completely black

>>14144527
>you wouldn't eat me, would you anon?
HELL YES!

>>14144527
do not woorry little one... I only eat the soulless flesh of the fishies

>>14144527
it is ethical to let all living creatures experience childhood & adolescence then allow them to reproduce and mercy kill them as soon as the offspring can take care of itself because everything is downhill after that
deer in particular hate living and are very suicidal

>>14144527
No

>>14144527
No, I have bigger plans for you

>>14144527
not when your that small

I WANT TO ____ THAT DEER

>>14144994
>date

>>14144527
of course i would deer arent intelligent.

>>14144527
I wouldn't eat a baby dear, because it hasn't lived a life yet, that's pretty evil. I kill adult deer all the time because they're worthless wood rats though. I live in an area where deer are really docile and stop and stare while you drive past. I stopped my car and shot one in the head with my glock the other day. Park rangers had to clean that shit up lmao. I fucking HATE deer.

>>14144527
Not yet. I haven't check but I'm pretty sure there is a law in my state against shooting underage deer.

>>14144527
I literally shoot you for a job without eating you because you're vermin, what makes you think I wouldn't eat you?

>>14144527
I got some deer cheddar and jalapeno summer sausage in my freezer been meaning to take it out... Deer meat just goes bad to fast

i hate deer so goddamn much

>>14144527
i would wait for you to grow so i can get more meat out of you,. I can't digest grass so eating you now when you could digest more grass and grow more to make more tasty meat for me is stupid.

>>14144895
>No, I have bigger plans for you

*unzips boner*

>>14145058
scum

>>14145098
If you like things like crops and woodland to continue existing, shut up.

>>14145051
isn't it illegal to kill ANY underage game?

>>14145098
You'll stop caring about deer if you live in an area with a lot of them.
The pricks love standing around the curves in the road so you don't see them until it's nearly too late and if they can't do that they'll even just fucking jump in front of passing cars from the sides of straightaways.

>>14145110
it can get you in big trouble. my buddy's now on a registry for fucking a deer that had a fake ID.

>>14144527
no, i gotta wait for you to grow up first. Seriously though get into hunting. Get a meat freezer, take a buck once a year. I have so much meat I can never eat it all and it only costs like $100 (assuming you already have a gun and a vehicle to go out).

Best use for venison, imo, is to remove all of the fat (venison fat tastes like shit) grind it up with some cheap bacon for quality fat and freeze it in logs. You can make burgers, sausages, chili, ect. Not the biggest fan of venison steaks but that's a thing too.

>>14144527
Maybe it's just a species I don't know but the proportion are odd for a baby deer. Also, it is a good idea to wait for them to grow, but deer calf is really good.

not to get too /out/ but man I miss hunting. Blind in one eye, so I'm a fuckawful shot now.

>>14144527
I would rise you big and fat and when you reach the perfect age I'll put a bullet in your head and eat your nummy num meat

>>14144527

Hell yeah I would

>>14144541
Like what

>>14145401
Man what the fuck god damn you

>>14145401

>>14144527
I have and Bambi is really really tasty, eating freshly hunted venison is a northern midwestern rite of passage

>>14144527
Imagine how fantastic it would taste. Like those 2 month old lambs that have only ever fed on mother's milk.

>>14144527
not at all

>>14144527
If I had to?
I would try to catch some fish or some shit

>>14144527
of course not, you are too expensive. I'd rather get a ton of chicken tights

>>14145026
Fucking kek

Is a 9mm in the head enough to kill a deer or I need bigger like .50AE ? I don't know shit about hunting but I want to have a full freezer for free

>>14145807
Pistol hunting is cool, but aiming for the head is bullshit and wasteful.

>>14145807
Please take a hunter's ed course. You very rarely if ever prioritize a head shot, you want to be aiming side profile for a heart/lung. Ammunition is typically a 308 or a 223/556 can work within limited ranges. Smaller arms can kill a deer but the range and accuracy needed for a killshot to prevent the animal from running off for long distances, sustaining a nonlethal injury and all around suffering needlessly are way too clutch.

I don't mean to sound rude or pretentious but there's a difference between killing and hunting ethically and theres a lot more that goes into the latter than most people think and it's worth educating yourself about if it's something you think you may have an interest in.

>>14145401

>>14145341
Just keep the other eye open. Silly goose.

>>14144527
Only if I were desperate. I’d let her grow up before eating her

>>14145524
>>14145686
How new are you?

>>14145401
Me gusta.

DEERGASM xD

>>14144527
You would do well in a stew

>>14145807
>in the head
>.50AE
Fucking hell, son, it's not a rhino.

>>14145061
wtf is deer cheddar? how do you milk deers to make cheese?

>>14144527
Honestly, just putting a BBQ sauce would make me hungry.

>>14145401
Based Japan lmao

>>14145823
This the brain is the best part.

>>14145807
500 magnum +p

>>14145823
>>14145864

there is literally nothing wrong with headshots on game

>>14144527
Wouldn't kill but would eat

>>14144527
I do not eat bushmeat because I am not an impoverished third world bugman. Play stupid games win stupid prizes, that's what daddy always said to me. Give it to me still mooing! And whisky, straight. It's ok to be straight and it's ok to be white and I'm not afraid to say I'm a christian too. Sorry not sorry if that makes me a bigot.

>>14146608
>a fucking kimber
Yep, dumb and poor

venison tastes bad and requires money to process making it a huge waste of time
the hunter larp is the worst larp

>>14145807
Bro just look up snares

>>14145864
The only reason people aim for the heart/lungs is it's a bigger target than the head. That's it. If you're skilled enough who cares?

>>14144527
We’ve been over this. Mechanical planting and harvesting kills between twenty and thirty thousand small mammals per acre, every year. These animals are not instantly killed with a captive bolt gun, but they are crushed to death in their shallow burrows or ripped to shreds by whirling blades. Their atomized gore ends up permeating every single pulse, grain, bit of rice you eat. Unless you believe that somehow a cow’s life is worth more than a vole’s or a rat’s, which is totally stupid thinking as I’m sure you agree, you’re causing more suffering and animal death than if you exclusively ate beef, where you could easily kill only one cow per person per year.

It’s not the meat industry that kills the most animals per year. It’s big grain and soy.

No, only a sick freak of a vegan would eat grains and pulses and beans. It’s absolutely cruel! This is why, as an actually ethical vegan and not just a slave to big grain, you shouldn’t eat mechanically harvested crops of any kind. Imagine this little animals getting crushed, mangled, their guts spurting out in wormlike coils as they are crushed, entire families of them! Tiny little baby bunnies and voles, their eyes just opened for the first time, and the only thing they EVER saw was their poor mommy’s skull getting smashed and her brains coming out, right before that soy harvester kills them too.

Vegan people are sick freaks and they’re in a Satanic death cult - lying and saying they’re saving the planet when their soybean hunger is deforesting the Amazon and they deal much more death than a strict carnivore. All the while lying to themselves and everybody else.

Veganism is positively Satanic unless you do it like the Jain.

>>14146950
>Implying he'll ever actually go hunting
He'll get filtered by the licensing process alone.

>>14145026
>mfw the thought of a deer blindly fixated on a passing car as the driver pulls up, draws a pistol, and shoots it in the head crosses my mind

>>14145026
is a 9mm even enough to kill a deer at point blank range? I would think they have pretty tough skulls from evolution selecting the ones that ram their heads into other deer for mating rituals

>>14145972
Oh FUCK YOU, if you've been coming coming to 4chan longer than me, I'd be surprised. I'm 31 and was underageb& when I started. My point is if I wanted to see deer hentai I'd go to /b/ or look that shit up myself. I don't want to know that shit exists.

>>14147004
It's a fucking goat, even says so on the title.

>>14147004
way to out yourself faker

>>14145401
why am i getting a boner

>>14147004
that is tame AF though lol

its not even showing anything

i will wait some years until its meat will be perfect to make spezzatino

Venison is delicious.

>>14145864
Headshots are superior if you are skilled enough to get them. It's not a marksmanship thing, it's a stalking thing. I can almost always get closer than 100yds without being noticed and at that range a head is a very reasonable target to shoot depending on your angle and what the deer is doing. If you're farther out the lungs are where you need to shoot.

The faster the animal dies the better the meat will be, when you nail them in the lungs they take a few minutes to die and their body is pumping stress hormones the whole time.

>>14145401
/k/ NO!

>>14144527

No I wouldn't, little fawn, because deer are trash animals and your meat tastes like rancid shit.

>>14147182
said literally no one ever

why would I eat you when I could wait 2 years for you to be 8x the size first?

>>14144527
I've never eaten deer.

>>14144527
I have and will again.

>>14144527
Only after someone else killed, butchered, and packaged you into an inoffensive and unrecognizable form that I can use to mentally and emotionally separate the food from its source.

>>14144527
>appeal to pathos

>>14144776
You know that only the dominant deer get to reprocess right? That's why the Tule elk number in the thousands after basically going extinct. They kill off the old breeding males a few at a time to encourage diversity.

>>14145401
So disappointing that this is only six pages long.

>>14145401

>>14144527
look at that stupid fucking piece of shit
i want to hit it with my car holy fuck

>>14144527
sorry little guy, but I would.

>>14146993
A lot of poachers use .22lr on full grown white tail. It will kill if you got proper shot placements. 9mm itself is enough to kill bears too.
https://www.ammoland.com/2020/03/update-handgun-or-pistol-against-bear-attack-93-cases-97-effective/#axzz6Ims0apg7

God damn right I would.

God dammit /k/

>>14144527
I absolutely would

>>14144527
He's like one sandwich at best.
I'm going to need to eat at least 3 of him.

>>14145136
THEY KNOW WHAT THEY ARE DOING

>>14146983
Getting a hunting license is the most idiot friendly thing there is. One of the fucking questions said, and I shit you not:
>You are out hunting with a friend of yours when you hear a turkey in the bushes right behind him. What do you do?
A) Do not take the shot out of fear of hitting your friend
B) I forget
C) I forget
D) Take the shot, it's your only chance!

If you choose the last option, you deserve to be fucking commited.

>>14145401

>>14144527
No but I'd eat your parents

>>14146608
god this brand of instagram faux masculinity is so cringe worthy.

>>14145401

>>14146608
>having a straight whisky
Two straights is gay, so that's why I only drink gay whisky.

does anyone have that copypasta about the guy that fucked a doe?

>>14147004
Back to >reddit

>>14147004
I'll never understand why people like you come to this site thinking there are safe spaces on here or that you aren't one click away from the most disgusting porn you've ever seen.

>>14146436
>higher difficulty shot on highly sloped surface (=deflected bullet)
>nothing wrong
pick one

>>14144527
just walk into the crosshairs bambi
you won't feel a thing...

>>14146964
Nobody never fucks up a headshot.

>>14144527
Nah, you're too small and gamey.

>>14144994
>>14144895
>>14145093
>>14145401
>>14149428
>>14150382
>>>/k/

>>14144527
not yet! you've got to grow those itty bitty bones a bit more first!

>>14144895
>>14145000
>>14145401
why the hell is this a thing?

>>14152745
Deers are feminine as hell.

>>14144527
I would wait until you got older, had a decent life and maybe some kids. I would then kill you, say a prayer to thank you for your body and then use you to feed me and the people close to me.

>>14144527
I'm from China so yes, I will be eating you. Every single part of you.

>>14145401
This brings back memories.

>>14152745
Because subway sandwiches.
Also Mizone - Deer Cracker is better.

>>14145142
kek

>>14145401

>>14144527
well i wouldn't kill you, little baby deer, but if someone served me a piece of your meat i would not object.

I have and I do. you're literally the best meat god put on this planet.

>>14146608
what if I just like the taste of deer? and its more manly to hunt your own food instead of being a fag and buying your meats.

>>14146658
>venison tastes bad
Is this you?