/ck/ - Food & Cooking

nigger

>>13899116
Every webm thread is just the same shit reposted. Keep it in one thread unless you have something original to post.

>>13899116
you never flip the fish if it's open because it only needs to cook on one side, and if you do only with the clamped grill.

>>13899116
Fuck up thread? Fuck up thread.

>>13900522
thats what you get for buying an oval dutch oven

>>13899116
The cooked side of that fish looks delicious damn

>>13900524
No that's just babish being an incompetent retard as usual.

>>13900524
More like that's what you guy for pouring through a fucking handle.

>>13900543
people who only like fake syrup and dislike real maple syrup upset me highly.

>>13900504
Ayyo dis nigga eating bugs

>>13900621
>>13900614
these are just depressing

>>13900457
wow i've just recently started making egg sandwiches like this, but it a pan, and i just mean a simple eggs and cheese, without 10 different sauces haha
but making a egg pouch of the cheese and folding it like that is next level
and i cook it in a good amount of butter so i don't have to bother buttering the toast

>>13899191
fpbp

>>13900513
I looked this up. Literally against the law, it's protected. And why not start at the head? Why kill it like this

this is almost exactly identical to the last webm thread
we should wait a while for some new content to be generated / manifest
but in the meantime, can someone please post the "He posted it again!" pasta in response to this >>13900353

>>13900681
nobody spoonfeed this faggot
learn to use archives you son of a pig

>>13900614
Has potential, poor execution

>>13900670
Brad also did it on BA. But without all the sauces.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aC1gX08CM9M

>>13899116
So /jack/ thread

>>13900706
I want to see jack attempt haute cuisine.

>>13900621
Fuck me. People who eat eggs like this. Jesus Christ.

>>13900679
because the chinese are barabaric pieces of uncaring filth, they are literally unable to care about animals

>>13900757
This. Gooks are fucking baseline degeneracy that should be wiped from humanity permanently.

>>13900582
Unironically my girlfriend. It pisses me off, too.

>>13900785
I chock it up to poor parenting, it was likely all they had growing up and now real syrup just doesn't taste right to them.

>>13900803
who...who is this?

>>13900819
It's Kay
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeKWgImK1RAD9IGjWZqxmIw

>>13900353
>>13900455
>>13900457
Every thread.

>>13900621
Based and Pasipilled

>>13900819
>>13900820
Sorry, here's the one she posts on
https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCeKWgImK1RAD9IGjWZqxmIw

>>13900582
Tf is fake suryp?

>>13900727
Here you go

>>13900832
corn syrup with maple flavorings and colorings is NOT real maple syrup.

>>13900713
God I hope the Wuhan Virus kills them all.

>>13900899
And this is funny how, exactly?

>>13900832
99% of american "syrups" its all just corn syrup, coloring and flavouring.

>>13900949
you've never been in a crab webm thread on here?

How new are you?

>>13899116
Jesus christ...fucking throw the entire man into the trash.

>>13900835
What the fuck
Did he try and fail to soft-boil an egg instead of poaching it
How is this guy still alive

>>13900470
Not to this ridiculous degree but I've had 'walking tacos' at fairs that are just tacos but the tortilla is replaced with a bag of crashed up doritos.

nothing
In
This
Thread
Is
Funny

>>13900513
Supposedly the Chinese have a long-standing old-wives-tale that suffering makes meat taste better

Even if you're a complete psychopath, the opposite is true. Pain causes the muscles to tense.

>>13900957
I mostly hang out on /fit/ and /k/. And while both boards have their fair share of faggots, cretins, and retards, this is a new low.

>>13900899
>>13900949
>>13900957
>>13901002
The crab that escapes turns off the burner.

>>13901002
well if you dislike that, never go in a crab thread, just webm's of factory lines where crabs get cut up and have their innards removed with a high degree of automated precision and velocity.

>>13900974
this is unironically based

>>13900877
>The only time Jack wasn't the reason for a fuckup

>>13899676
ill be sure to let him know

>>13901044
This remains the most baffling thing I've ever seen. It's clearly supposed to be a desert, but it's filled with unwhipped unsweetened cream cheese and shitloads of cheese and celery? The fuck?

>>13900974
Cool.

>>13901066
>thick white strands of unrendered fat
I know they say to cook buffalo rare but that's blue

>>13900803
ah fuck. every time

>>13901082
Got me gud

>>13901119
>American Cheese
>hot sauce
fucking disgusting

>>13901082
Link to the full video?

>>13900835
is that horrid shit supposed to be a croque monsieur?

>>13900455
Lmao, their faces

>>13900621
ALL THE EGGS!

>>13901167
I think it's supposed to be a fucked up fast version of eggs benedict

>>13901145
That would literally make me vomit.

>>13900800
>God of Cookery
Never thought I'd meet a fellow man of culture here.

Does anyone dare post: THE FORBIDDEN WEBM?

>>13900974
How does any air get into the pit?
Fires require oxygen

>>13900978
How do you eat it?

>>13901026
All of this is just such awful cancer, it's funny in a sad way

>>13901186
As someone who unironically buys that exact cheese, i have never had this problem, cutting through the plastic is easy for anyone with over 85 IQ. Above 100 and usually they're cutting it straight too.

>>13901128
What would you use instead of American

>>13901291
Cheddar

>>13901287
He's not using a very good knife for the task of slicing a solid hunk of cheese straight down like a neanderthal.

>>13900466
this shit looks abysmal but tastes great when you're feeling depressed

>>13901040
oh dear that is adorable

>>13900765
Tough words gweilo, what are you actually going to do about it?

>>13900966
>>13901167
Just the way jack like his egg

>>13900461
Where's the nasi lemak tho

>>13901021
>The only time Jack wasn't the reason for a fuckup
Wrong, thats red cooper chef, the instructions clearly say "do not latch while cook" in bright red. Jack being proud of never read any instruction latch it anyway and called the product dangerous and defective he was sued by the company who make the cooper chef and was forced to make another video
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGleZj-w59Y

>>13900800

absolument basé mr chow

>>13901352
Lose the guac, add a decent stock and this could be tasty.

>>13901026
chinks would actually do this on hotels and ruin the appliances for every human who had the misfortune of having the same room afterwards

>>13900513
Are they eating an American?

>>13901424

based jacky boy historian, hillarious lore as always

>>13900466
The Americas were a mistake

>>13900771
why the fuck would the japs do this

>>13901310
Joe Biden please stop

>>13899116
A fish died for this

>>13900771
Dumb.

>>13900974
>Falls into it

>>13901002
>this is a new low

Reddit seems more suitable for ya bud

>>13901119
Isn't she Jewish?

>>13901149
Worst part is I bet my ass they didn't use that shitty sprayer to make the sandwich or the pancakes

>>13901582

>>13901310
This is just sad, really.

>>13901379

>>13901639
this is giving me intestinal distress

>>13900593
why did this give me a boner

>>13900845
It doesn't claim to be maple suryp tho? Syrup is just a blanket term for a solution of sugar and water is it not?
>Dark syrup
>Light syrup
>Malt syrup
>Simple syrup
>Maple syrup

>>13901727
They can't call it maple because it has no actual maple syrup in it, that doesn't mean that isn't what they're trying to copy.

>In a recent consumer survey, the Washington Post found that while 27 percent of the Americans polled liked real maple syrup, nearly 70 percent preferred artificial versions (25 percent chose Aunt Jemima, 24 percent picked Mrs Butterworth’s, and 14 percent preferred Log Cabin)

>>13901713
At least it's not tile patterns

>>13901257
Before the lid? The mouth is big enough for some circulation

After the lid? It's and oven not a grill

>>13901458
I dont see any guacamole in there?

>>13901634

>>13901040
Thanks for reminding me I still have a working ticker

>>13900771
>boiled eggs
they had me until then, overall this would just be better if it didn't have the extra dough on it.

>>13901736
Well i can see how the packagin might be misleading especially in a region where maple syrup is prevalent but a single glance tells you its not maple suryp but dark suryp.
Imo calling dark syrup "fake maple syryp" is like calling orange juice fake apple juice. They're just two different things entirely.

>>13901776
it's got artifical maple flavorings, i mean, what the fuck else is it?

"Dark syrup" doesn't imply a maple taste, but that's what you get in aunt jemima's.

>>13901291
swiss, gouda, smoked chedder.

>>13901810
Well if it's got artificial flavourings then i get your point

>>13901257
>Americans thinking fire equals heat
nigga this ain't minecraft

>>13901813
None of these melt like American does. Get over your Reddit-tier fear of American cheese

>>13901310
DementiaJoemakesasandwich.webm

>>13901910
gouda melts pretty good, I don't hate american cheese I just like those other cheeses more.

>>13901582
/co/ here, Harley is indeed jewish. It's rarely mentioned though.

>>13901616
So other men can have sex with you obviously.

>>13901956
>gouda melts pretty good
Not in the same way as American. Grilled cheese is as much about mouthfeel and contrasting textures as it is about flavor. Though you can emulsify Gouda and make good melting slices with a few grams of emulsifying salt. It's great for burgers.

>>13900466
why are food(?) like this never served in adequate containers or plates large enough to hold it all without it going to spill?

>>13901986
probably cheaper to buy the normal sized containers than slightly larger ones.

>>13901379
this gave me flashbacks from accidentally witnessing prolapse porn

>>13901997
>accidentally

>>13900713
For some reason the knowledge that most Indians don't use cutlery is more disgusting than them shitting in the street

>>13902018
>Steak Americano
>prepared by a literal goblin
>also that filename
fucking pottery

>>13902034
wait until you hear they also don't believe in toilet paper and use their bare hands to wipe their asses

>>13901978
>>13901956
>>13901910
>none of those melt like american does
because they're actual cheese and not "cheese-like dairy product"
You can still get fantastic coverage with cheddar or swiss or gouda and it actually adds a flavor and texture that's not like yellow cement

>>13901390
Jesus christ you can see the white around the yolk isn't even set what a fucking animal

>>13900800
Is this where they stole the idea for Avatar the Last Airbender from lmao
Those fucking hacks

>>13902051
>le fake cheese
>le yellow cement
Reddit-tier

>>13900826
>nooooooo you can't have a board culture you have to entertain me with new novelties

>>13900949
Life is empty and meaningless. We spend it isolating that understanding from our thoughts. When we are reminded of the absolute absurdity of existence, the inevitability of death, we can only laugh at the incongruity with our sense of place in the world. This is the essence of most humor. Arguably all humor, but I will not make that argument.

>>13902067
American cheese is fucking gross, man. Yeah, I get it, it "melts into every crevice," but it tastes like a fucking trash can and feels grimy after a single bite.

People who enjoy large amounts of American cheese or nacho cheese disgust me

>>13902081
>American cheese is fucking gross, man. Yeah, I get it, it "melts into every crevice," but it tastes like a fucking trash can and feels grimy after a single bite.
It's just milder cheddar/colby. You're Redditposting.

>>13902096
why would someone without tastebuds browse a food and cooking board?

>>13902109
Enjoy your Dunning-Kruger. Hopefully you grow out of this.

>>13899220
No.

>>13902116
>Use big words
>Instant expert on the matter
reddit

>>13902137
God bless.

>>13900771
What the fuck. That uses like 20 eggs and looks like shit.

>>13902096
No. What you are describing may be a type of cheese made in America, but it is not what is meant by the term American cheese.

>>13900457
The 6" mudding knife is a nice touch

>>13901260
Fork or spoon

>>13902196
>Modern American cheese is a type of processed cheese made from cheddar, colby, or similar cheeses.
First sentence on Wikipedia.

>>13900974
Absolute legend.

>>13901379
Jessie Slaughter Fleshlight

>>13900739
>corn dogs
>use flour for the "batter"
Kay is based.

>>13900585
Alpha chad food right here.

>>13900593
At music festivals on the camping ground people used to put ravioli cans on their grills to explode them. you could hear the bang all over

>>13900585
Which pandemic will eating this cause?

>>13900974
what meat is that?

>>13901002
>Thinking /fit/ is above /ck/ in terms of post quality

when jack dies will he go to heaven?

>>13901203

>>13901350
they call me the ching chong slayer

>>13900513
I fucking hate niggers and chinks that do shit like this.
Fucking disgusting. Thats a whale shark, an endangered species, just a single whale shark is worth more than every single nigger and chink on this earth combined. Fuck those fucking animals.

>>13900800
Based

>>13901424
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SGleZj-w59Y
This thing seems to be made for literal idiots seeing as he made something edible looking for once

>>13901578
jack and oil

>>13901002
>a fucking crustacean thinks he can tell me what to laugh at
I will come at you with the kitchen shears you bug

>>13902308
He goes straight to hell and his punishment will be learning to cook under deceased pro chefs until he learns to not be a retard. Then he can reincarnate and try again

>>13900513

Chinks are insects.

>>13901576
Fucking thots and their ahegao faces

>>13902372
i hope they kill every whale shark just to piss you off racist

The filenames make it even better, I'm cracking up over here.

>>13900800
culinary kino

>>13900771
I wish someone would nuke the fucking Tasty HQ

>>13901474
I've done it with ramen before, when in a hotel with no microwave.
just put a ramen brick into the pot, and fill the back up with water like normal.
it cooks it really slowly and the noodles get super plump and fat.
then you just put the seasoning in your bowl and pour it the noodles in.

>>13901080
it looks like it's still cold on the inside

>>13902642
Fuck you you piece of small dicked garbage chink

>>13902777
you sound like a pussy getting mad over a fish.

>>13901761
top kek

just want to say that I've been lurking ck forever, rarely post tho
but I want to thank you guys making webm, especially jack webms, because I cant be bothered to go look at his youtube channel, even tho I always like watching them, I watched them so many times actually I just know each one that is posted from the thumbnail
that said, make more pls

>>13901061
Good Lord. Is there more?

>>13901986
Seems like it's by design. It makes the dish look fuller. So much food that it's overflowing. It's over the top decadence. Same way classy foods use minimal portions. Makes it seem subtle and elegant. Basically, it's stylized plating.

>>13902109
Have you never been to /ck/ before? I think you should go back where you came from.

>>13900845
fuck me so does that mean I have never tried real maple syrup.

>>13901186
>>13901287
>cutting through the packaging, pushing all the shit thats on the packaging like literal rat shit and dust and bug shit and all sorts of germs, into the cheese
Just take the fucking wrapper off, you subhuman.

>>13902955
if you thought aunt jemima's was real, then yea probably.

If you like that, the closest approximation in terms of real maple syrup would be something like pic related
>Grade A - Dark Robust

It's technically the lowest quality, but it has the most maple flavor, which is overly sweet, but is closer to the sweetness level of the fake syrup you're used to.

>>13902976
>>13902955
I would recommend staying away from Grade A - Golden color (delicate) because the flavor is much less in your face and many people don't like how subtle it is if they're used to the fake stuff.

>>13900800
dubs confirm based

>>13902096
Government cheese back when was a mix of cheddar and colby

These days American Cheese is less than 50% cheese.

>>13900771
I want to try it.

>>13901054
bite of fail

>>13900657
This one >>13900614 is a joke. The guy's a top tier shitposter.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tom_Willett

>>13900800
there needs to be more movies like this

>>13900974
the stuffed peppers look shite

>>13901634
number 14, taco bell piss tacos

>>13902018
holy shit she's ugly

>>13900466
There’s a Mexican restaurant in my town that does this shit

>>13900593
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNb1vHzm-BY

>>13902642
>racist
oy vey

>>13901040

>>13900522
That's literally what it looks like when I shit lol

>>13901310
this is what happens after your wife dies lads

>>13901517
>>13901546
>>13901774
>>13902182
>>13902690
>talking shit about timpano
watch big night and then kill yourselves

>>13900780
ngl this shit is pretty gross. i have a fairly strong stomach for different foods, but the slushy noodle soup is honestly something i wouldn't eat again. more power to u if u like it tho

>>13903210
God I wish I had a wife

>>13901466
didnt that dude jump off a building?

>>13900513
>rathian tail farming

>>13900764
based

>>13900713
I thought this was a joke until I went to an indian buffet with a friend of mine. Granted, my friend is filipino, but he still ate like 4 plates of food like this. Kept licking his hands and shit and then going to get more. Was back at the beginning of March, so after Coronavirus had already breached the US.

>>13901350
Riddle me this, how many innocent people died at Tiananmen Square on June 4, 1989?

>>13903431
How many innocent people died in Iraq in 20xx?

>>13901488
>t. never met a Mexican
They do that stuff all the time, it's not Americans

>>13903553
Holy shit you're retarded

>>13901310
Reminds me of that Swans song about being fucked up.

>>13901310
>They don't know about Featureman
damn this place really does have a lot of new users

>>13901424
Damn where is the original one?

>>13901424
>but you'll read that in the warnings
What a stupid fuck

>>13903349
what

>>13903349
no, he's still alive

>>13901046
That is clearly a first timer

>>13901145
i would definitely try this

>>13901342
anyone have the video of the chinese restaurant with the grill table that fucking explodes into a fireball?

>>13900796
was not expecting that lol

holy shit

>>13901061
I need to feed my gf that recipe.

>>13900353
You know what they say, can't get out without breaking a couple eggs

>>13900457
thats looks pretty damn good ngl

>>13900614
based featureman
an inspiration

>>13902317
Is this a joke about how poor russians are? Been waiting years tp find out why people post this webm. Dosent make sense

>>13903577
Yeah, and they need to all GO BACK. Fucking hell.

>>13900489
So does this trash american food have a name?? What do these thing taske like? Ive always been curious about the cup ramen one.

>>13903586
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QGzMkaH4VCs
He failed to read the safety instruction twice and call the indian customer service employee to bitch about his own idiocy

>>13903651
Jack is proud of never reading any instruction as seen in this video where they have to put a card in bold lettres that say "ALL PRE-HEAT FOR 3 MIN" for mouth breather like jack. As excepted jack pre heated nothing and complain about the finished product
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fGjPSMcGmlA

>>13900979
>I've seen enough hentai...

>>13903493
About tree fiddy

>>13900585
seahorses are endangered. fucking cunts i swear

>>13900593
That took way longer to explode than I expected

>>13900621

These are the people who go to Applebees and think it's fine dining. Because they're used to eating literal dogshit at home and the taste of a microwaved meal might as well be from a 5-star hotel.

>>13900800

Holy shit is this the dude from shaolin soccer and kung fu hustle? I had no idea he had a cooking movie too, need to watch this shit where is it

>>13900843
im not even sure what that is

>>13901040
it makes me wonder if the dog steps into the bowl as a way to sacrifice himself or to leave no room for a puppy

>>13901514
it pisses me off the way he cuts it, what an asshole

>>13904353
With that smug self-possessed look, as though he considers this stupid behavior puts him above the rest of humanity.

>>13901514
Very American webm. The complete destruction of aesthetics for a perceived utility.

>>13904364
couldn't said it better

>>13903553
You realize that Mexico is in America, right?

>>13903493
not enough

>>13901418

>>13902096
Based. American cheese is my go-to for burgers. Nothing else like it. Redditfags can go back to soiboi mouth gaping about bacon and get the sand out of their vag when it comes to American cheese.

>>13903034
>These days American Cheese is less than 50% cheese.
No. You're not allowed to call it American Cheese if that's were the case. It would have one of many FDA designated names depending on the composition.

>>13901291
velveeta

>>13904007
That’s Mexico man not America

>>13900582
That was me as a kid but then as I got older I discovered the wonders of real maple syrup, I can eat both but real maple syrup is so much better.

>>13900713
Don’t forget to shit in the street and wipe your ass with your hand before this.

>>13902973
do you realize how much literal shit you breathe in on a daily basis. who cares. you wont be laughing when covid takes you because your immune system isnt used to fighting off shit like jacks

>>13901026
Who the fuck owns a coffee maker but doesn't have an oven or a stove top or something Jesus Christ this shit makes me so angry.

>>13900455
I feel bad for the guy at the end.

>>13900949
I bet you are super fun at parties

>>13900974
Pretty dope

>>13904237
What did they do wrong? How do you do this the right way? Let the omelette cook through before adding the bread?

>>13904103
>>13901424
he also caught his grill on fire because he didn't use the product correctly

>>13901514
Dangerously based

>>13901776
You can’t actually be this dense

>>13901738
This one always kills me

>>13904103
After watching a few of his videos I honestly wish someone would beat him severely.

>>13901680
>filename
my fucking sides

>>13901605
the character is jewish

>>13900621

>>13901257
Ever heard of charcoal?

>>13902080
got nothing better to do

>>13901082
Daily reminder that this cunt comes from a wealthy family and paid to get his TV show produced and aired. He has no culinary skill whatsoever.

>>13904553
It's not an omelet for a start.

>>13902212
>Quotes wikipedia
>Expects to be taken seriously

Yeah, pick one bub.

>>13900353
yes but who supplies the egg

>>13901291
cheddar jack you nigger

>>13900513
This is a whaleshark, they are super cool. It's a shame that these insects do this.