/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>13771029
she is a stupid bitch and she has been ruining Bon Appetit

>>13771029
God, I hate all of you

>>13771029
this post is advertising or begging

Claire just admitted to having extensive expertise - both eating and making.

>>13771050
No, it's not but abusing the reporting system is an actual thing

>>13771029
I'm making babies with Claire

>>13771059
>reporting off topic threads is abuse
kys e-celeb faggot

>>13771054

Well, she definitely looks like she has extensive expertise eating

These episodes are getting worse and worse. Fucking Bagel bites? Wow she put cheese and sauce on small pieces of bagel, amazing!

>>13771073
>this thread about someone making mini bagel pizzas is off topic

Awww yiss, it's the sauce from her Hot Pockets recipe. How versatile.

>>13771119
Why on God's green earth would you go through the trouble of making sauce from scratch for goddamn bagel bites.

>>13771131
They're gourmet bagel bites

>>13771143
that’s debatable...

>>13771143
Bagel bites aren't supposed to be gourmet

>>13771029
36 minute video with about 6 minutes of useful info.

>>13771073
stupid fucking snitch i hope you get hiv

Is she losing weight? What a shame.

>>13771029
Does that pose imply: fuck me anal but be gentle and i will make you a cookie

>>13771450
ive literally never had anal before!

>>13771073
i bet even that mongrel whore you call your mother curses the day she shat you out in this world

It's beautiful, and actually something I could see making for a party.

why is chris always such a pretentious faggot?

>>13771566
because hes based and redpilled.

I want to fuck Gabby.

But to the point, these become less interesting the more she recycles techniques from previous trials.

>>13771097
this thread is clearly an e-celeb thread, which belongs on >>>/trash/

why doesnt she wear a hair net

>>13771029
I just hate how smug all these cunts act when making Pizza Rolls or Bagel Bites like their Upper West Side asses have never heard of such plebeian things and can't comprehend anyone eating them. Sorry bitch I don't have $600 for lunch at Mise en Place

>>13771751
Fucking city slickers with their fancy German cars

>"Today we're going to be making.....*checks script*.. water."
>"I've never actually had water before, I always saw it in the store, but my parents never let me drink any."
>"Ok let me try this."
>*Drinks a tiny sip of water*
>"Wow, that's....gonna be a challenge."
>"Oh my god Chris, can you come over here and try this?"
>"Oh wow Claire, this water is really good, I haven't had any in ages."
>"I just need to figure out how I can make this gourmet."
>Not even an hour in and Claire is completely lost
>"Brad can you please help me? What do you think needs to stay for it to still be a glass of water?"
>"Well Claire, it needs to be wet for one."
>Claire looks like she's about to cry
>"I don't think I can make the water wet Brad this is going to be way too hard."

>>13771781
kek

>>13771029
I would bite her bagel if you get my drift.

>>13771826
fug

>>13771781
>7 million views
>500k likes
>trending on Youtube
>15 new IWDFCFTBATK fan videos
>6 new "Brad and Claire should totally fuck" compilations

>>13771076

>>13771029
>Aw fuck I shit my pants again

I just want Claire to tell me I'm trash while I fuck her from behind.

>>13771852
i'd def f clare for sure

>>13771029
I'd like to bite her bagel if you know what I'm saying

>>13771950
eMagine the smell

>>13771029
>when you haven’t subverted your hosts nation for over an hour

>pastry chef
>admitted to never having tempered chocolate before
Brad is the only BA person that matters.

>>13772927
But she never claimed to be a chocolatier?

>>13771090
>>13771826
>>13771830
>>13771837
damn she looks like this now? white women age terribly

I WANT TO CUM INSIDE CARMELLA

>>13772933
She's only 27, too.

what do you think the inside of her pussy smells like

>>13771043
you're a stupid bitch and have been ruining your family

>>13773006
Like most pussies. Maybe a little more fecund than other pussies in her age group, but not significantly moreso.

Anyone else miss Brad in Gourmet Makes? The best ones feature him heavily. Brad and Claire are just so funny together.

i worry that she works too much. she stays late until it is full on night

She seems pissed in this video.

>>13773194
probably because she actually ate bagel bites a lot as a kid so she feels she has a lot of memories riding on it

>>13771029
She is exactly who I hate to work with in resturants. Anxiety stricken, on the verge of tears, and always generally upset about something. I agree with other guy that Brad made that show, and now I never watch the new ones.

>>13772927
she says she is no chef

>>13773059
doesn't he still stop by every so often?
I stopped watching when they became 30+ minutes but I remember seeing him in one of the intros recently

>>13773051
Based

>>13773255
Every video she's in is "pastry chef makes x" what a goddam lie

>>13771029
She's been on a streak of zero international appeal.

What does everyone think about this?

>>13771267
you might be the dumbest human being on earth, im not religious but ill pray for you

>>13773255
Ofc she's not a pastry chef. She can't even temper chocolate and throws a tantrum when she has to. She's incompetent, that's why she got fired... Except all you fucks complained that you can't watch your precious claire anymore and they hired her back for "consulting" aka "film gourmet and gtfo".

did sohla come by and show her up again or is she no longer allowed on screen?

i miss the snowsquall so much bros

>>13772759
That's because you're a thirsty simp.

>>13772933
>Claire "Gefilte Fish & Vodka" Saffitz
>white

>>13773519
I wanna take it home and touch it's boobs

>>13771043
>”Okay, so today I’m here to create a gourmet version of (insert extremely common junk food here).”
>Stands behind enormous pile of said junk food
>”Okay, so um. I’ve never actually ever tried (insert extremely common junk food here) before…”
>tentative tiny bite
>makes face
>”Wow this is terrible omg why do people eat this. Oh wow.”
>”but you know I think this is going to be pretty easy to make.”
>dissects piece of junk food
>takes measurements
>”Oh why hello random person who works here who wandered into the shot. Let’s talk about inane bullshit, shall we?”
>tee hee, hah hah, we so hipster
>”Okay so I’m going to look at the Internet for a video on how to make this.”
>”Yes okay this should be very easy. I’ll have this done by tomorrow.”
>”So I’m going to start out using this basic recipe I used when making (insert random junk food item here) for an older episode.”
>proceeds to change at least three things from her basic recipe
>it turns out wrong
>”Oh no. Gosh. Okay this didn’t work. Let’s try again.”
>proceeds to change at least three other things from her basic recipe
>it turns out a little better, but still wrong.
>depression.exe
> “Hello random person working here who just so happened to walk by. Hey taste this for me?”

I mean I could go on, but this is every single fucking episode. Youtube is relentless about recommending this garbage.

>>13771029

>>13773519
>doll is skinny
Off-model tumblr garbage. Claire is a disgusting fat hog who smells like cheap stripper perfume and simmered cabbage.

>>13773519
hot glue

guys which pop rocks was better you reckon?

>>13771029
who cares about this 25 going on 45 kike

>>13771455
>"All my friends loved anal, but my mom never let me have it. We were more of a deepthroat family."

>>13771800
I don't, can you explain it to me please?

>>13771029
GOD I WANT TO FUCK CLAIRE SO DAMN MUCH BROS

>>13771029to
Do you know what you can do when threads are just off-topic bait like this one? You can report it for being off-topic.
Help make this a better board by reporting this bullshit thread.
Thanks!

>>13774604
rollin

>>13771029
It looks like she’s grunting from a tummy ache and is about to let out a smelly brat.

>>13771267
The entire point of her videos is to take shitty snack foods and make gourmet versions of them. How new are you?

>>13774697
A feat she has never actually accomplished, mind you. Artisan in the strict sense of being hand made, perhaps, but never gourmet.

>>13771029
>mushrooms, olives and fucking pineapples
I just lost all my respect for Sohla.

>>13774695
oi its kosher, too!

>>13774742
For me it is the opposite reaction. That is the exact range of toppings you want on a pizza. A salty, a sweet and/or tangy, and mushrooms.

>>13771029
Is this the bob ross of /ck/?

>>13774704
At one point in this episode she makes the bagel base and concludes that they're too good and she needs to undercook them a little so they're closer to real Bagel Bites. They need to change the name of the series.

>>13774221
she literally said in this episode she likes bagel bites you mongoloid. she rarely says she doesn't like the food

>>13774685
i love u long time

>circkejerking this hard over some Jews

Goyim are truly pathetic.

>>13774926
did you watch the video? She says this all the time you libtard

>>13771043
There is something intangible about her that I hate. Brad too.

Crypto-pretentiousness?

>>13773519
I have a jar

>>13774604

>>13775560
Do it you coward

>>13772927
tempering chocolate is legitimately hard though

>>13776839
it's super easy if you sous vide it and she has access to do so

>>13774915
no, the Bob Ross of /ck/ is steve

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HTy5NxcKOx4

is this the video where she is the most attractive? this episode is honestly peak claire qtness

Imagine the genetic deformities.

>>13776839
Sohla doesn't struggle

>>13773255
what on earth is happening to that camera man?

>>13773772
the mexican lady has duct tape holding her clothes together

>>13774497
There is only one thing Claire can do better than Ben.

>>13777125
Thats how she has done it since

>>13777160
wow she was so much thinner back then
i do kinda prefer thicc Claire

>>13774221
You're a huge faggot IRL, right? I can tell from this post

>>13777573
Argentinian

>>13778251
same difference

Brad and Amiel are the only people worth a damn

>>13774697
I don't watch e celeb pretend chefs on youtube like a fag