/ck/ - Food & Cooking

oh fuck I can't finish it, Christ it fucking hurts, I 'm in the ahhhhhhhjj

oh god it is so bad. now it is slowly burning the way through my tummy ahhhh I can already see the old bay through my thinning belly skin uuu

oh fuck ofuck, I'm currently in the bathroom letting out small little pebble shits. I can feel my body trying to expel the mistake from its depths. The pain is ungodly but the flexing of my anus grants me momentary relief.

>>13380965
I bought a container of Old Bay. I know the Marylanders love it but I don't know what to put it on.

>>13381020
Pebble shits just mean you're dehydrated.

>>13381036
Anything but fucking pasta, save it for fish or crab boiling! Oh SHiT the pain is unreal, WHATEVER YOU DO ANON USE CONSERVATIVE AMOUNTS!!!

>>13381045
Thank you, I have come to the realization that its not the shitting that gives me relief but rather the Spider-Man like squatting that relieves my pain( also the pantlessness) Ahhhhhhhhhhgggggggg I have begun to drink sink water while squatting on the toilet.

my leg feels like it's vibrating but on a positive note my stomach is better

>>13381104
God is dead, the pain is back

>>13381036
Seafood, eggs, chicken, potatoes, it's good on pretty much everything except pasta apparently.

>>13380965
>this absolute faggot shitting up the board

What kind of absolute degenerate puts old bay in pasta and then replies to themselves over and over about their shit?

Seriously find the nearest toaster and take a bath with it, you absolute nigger.

>>13381036
I never thought I'd get tired of old bay but my ex managed to make it happen. She put it on fucking everything. Every goddamn meal I ate for 7 years had old bay on it.

>>13381036
Marylander here. Old Bay tastes like shit.

>European
>Have no idea what old Bay is
>Some dude puts it on pasta and is giving birth to his soul on shitter

Fuck me sideways, what do you Americans put in your spice blends, powdered glass with a little bit of depleted uranium ?

>>13381680
This is why you never, ever use pre-mixed spices

>inb4 "b-but what about Chachere's??"
Fuck that cajun dingus

>>13380965
how much did you add?

>>13381036
Only correct answer is watery soup

>>13381680
>Fuck me sideways, what do you Americans put in your spice blends, powdered glass with a little bit of depleted uranium ?
The real question is why you guys have such fucked digestive tracts. If Old Bay bothers you, my food would send you to the hospital.

And the uranium is just for an added feeling of warmth, like being near a fireplace at night.

>>13381680
It's celery salt, chili powder, pepper, and paprika. Nothing crazy.

>>13380965
Probably the canola oil + a mild gluten intolerance over the old Bay.

>>13381730
>celery salt
that's not a thing

>>13381835
What'd you say about me?

>>13381868
nice shop

>>13381036
If you like a savory popcorn, it's great on fresh popped, alright on microwave popcorn.

>>13381730
3 of those ingredients are spicehead self torturer ingredients.

>>13381927
It was literally the first Google image search you fucking retard.

Garlic salt is also a thing. Or is that notion too triggering for you too?

>>13381947
>trust me it's on (((google)))!
ok joomer