/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>weigh fruit without a bag
>select bag as container

>at self checkout
>Do you want bags?
>say no
>carry 30 apples out in my hands
>actually i really did want some bags

>pretend to scan
>put items in bag
>leave

>machine says "Insert cash or select payment type"
>insert card before selecting payment type

It's all fun and games until walmart takes you to court.

>>13293971
i did that once, just because I bought 12 different fucking apples. i've had them all just about. put em all in as delicious reds.

>live in the gayest state in the nation
>have to pay 10 cents for every plastic bag I use
>have to input how many bags I use when at the self checkout
>always ring up zero bags

>>13294431
That's just stealing tyrona.

>>13293971
>machine tells me to please take receipt
>I don't
KILLER INTRUDER HOMICIDAL MAN
IF YOU SEE ME COMING RUN AS FAST AS YOU CAN

>>13294345
theyd have to catch me first

>>13293971
Does anybody else's Walmart have the cable provider salesperson that hangs out by the electronics section asking every passerby "Excuse me who is your cable provider?"
>at Walmart
>walk past cable salesnigger
>Excuse me my dude can I ask who your cable provider is?
>"No you may not."
>continue shopping

>>13294562
wat

>Go to the bathroom
>see "employees must wash hands" sign
>wash my hands even though I don't work there

I'M THE SCATMAN

>>13294495

>>13293971
>Go to le fancy suit store
>try on a suit
>dribble pee pee on the pants and itch my butt with the coat
>Return it to the rack
>"No its not my style"


AND THEY RUN WHEN THE SUN COMES UP
WITH THEIR LIVES ON THE LINE

>>13294613
What the fuck is wrong with you, anon

>>13294613
based

>>13293971
>EXCESSIVE QUANTITY OF BANANAS DETECTED, PLEASE WAIT FOR ASSISTANCE!
>EXCESSIVE QUANTITY OF BANANAS DETECTED, PLEASE WAIT FOR ASSISTANCE!
>EXCESSIVE QUANTITY OF BANANAS DETECTED, PLEASE WAIT FOR ASSISTANCE!

>>13294239
Next level
>>13294562
Quite savage treatment my anon, good show
>>13294613
I'm a fan of a bit of mischief but that might be too far

A few times I've been out of money because I have made a few terrible decisions and instead of humbling myself and asking my family for money for groceries I walked into my local large chain grocery store, filled up a cart and walked out. I don't have a car so carrying 30-40 lbs of groceries a mile or two seems like a decent 10% penance for my sins. I've probably done this 4-5 times. It doesn't make me feel good and I know their margins are short but I've done my pro/con chart and went with it. The bigger bummer is im afraid to shop normally at that store now when I'm solvent so I have to resort to 7-11

My life is a mess but i do love/loathe it
Thanks anons

>>13294910
Food pantries exist.

>>13293971
>one of the workers approaches me and asks me if I need help finding anything
>tell her to get the fuck away from me

>greeter is eyeing me to check my receipt
>ohfuckohfuckohfuckohfuck

>>13294413
This but with peppers. Fucking Harris Teeter didn't have half of the types I bought anywhere on the list so they all got entered as cheapo jalapenos.

>take 2 pack of soda
>dont scan the package
>scan only one of the bottles
>greeter can hear the beep
>pay and walk out with 50% off soda

>be me
>go to my local supermarket in Europe
>use the portable machine provided by them to scan products barcodes as I put them in my bags when I’m shopping
>when I’m done head to the checkout totem knowing already how much I have to pay and with the groceries already perfectly placed inside my bags brought from home
>pay with credit card and leave

Alternative version

>attempt to pay with credit card
>a message appears on the screen
>you have been selected for a random check, please wait the operator
>middle aged woman comes by and checks all my groceries to see if I niggered something
>I didn’t
>thanks sir here’s a 5€ discount for your patience and honesty

Alternative version 2

>I forgot to scan a product
>they see
>it’s the usual small piece of shit product that costs 1€
>ok sir you forgot to scan this one, pay attention because after 5 “mistakes” in a year you’ll be banned from using the scanner machine
>have a nice day

One day I panicked because there were missing products on the receipt so since there were the check out control ladies I scanned the missing product again and paid a second time, for a second receipt.
When I got home I noticed that the first receipt was printed on the back too.

another faggot reddit thread

>Buy expensive/organic produce
>Scan it out correctly as expensive/organic produce because I'm not nignog

"The measure of a man's real character is what he would do if he knew he would never be found out."

>>13294953
true, but not within a reasonable distance for me. It would be probably a four hour round trip by public transport, and I'd have to fill out a bunch of paperwork beforehand. It soothes my degenerate mind to have a single shame hour excursion

>>13293971
>who else here /white trash/ or /nig/?

>>13295631
>>13294239
Do walmat checkouts not have scales? All the self checkouts at stores here have a scale you put your groceries on once scanned so it can tell if you scan one item but put down six and makes an alarm.

If Walmart doesn't do that they deserve people pulling shit like this lol

>>13295776
>if you scan one item but put down six
You put the other five somewhere else

>>13295656
>thanks sir here’s a 5€ discount for your patience and honesty

I really dig that actually. Though I never use the self check out because I know it's just the store's way of cutting down on human workers.

>>13295784
I haven't been in a walmart so I can't say. Here though everything is very open and there are attendees there checking things. It would be pretty noticeable if someone scanned a thing and then put one can on the scale and the other five in the cart or their bag or something. If you were just going to slip it into your pocket or bag it would be much better to do not at the checkout counter.

I have lifted a very pricy 24 year aged cheddar I am fond of but far too cheap to pay for but only a couple of times.

>>13295791
I always use it because I’m an autismo and having to put my groceries in the bag as the lady scans them as they pass by makes me nervous especially when she’s done and tells you the total as you’re here in silence putting things in the bags and the people in line watch you.

Fuck this shit desu.

>>13295807
There's supposed to be staff monitoring the self-checkout, but as >>13295791 says, the entire reason self-checkout exists is so they don't have to pay human employees. They're understaffed and their employees are usually high as fuck and don't care about anything.
They actually spend some of the money they save not paying workers on a "shrinkage" budget because they know people are going to steal shit.

>be in a supermarket in europe
>use the self checkout so I don't have to bother with saying dobriy den to the cashier
>can't read this creole german slavic language
>starts beeping
sheeeiiitt

Had a very weird experience last night at my local grocery store

>Live in ghetto area of northeast US city
>Local grocery store is regional chain with self checkouts
>Usually 1 nog attendant playing on his phone
>NO SCALE ON THE SELF CHECKOUT
>Usually take $8-10 of food by not scanning things (out of a $30 trip)
>Last night as i pretend to scan a $6 Greek yogurt one of the staff stops walking right in front of me, and starts talking about people that always shoplift
>Have headphones in, pretend not to notice
>Steal 2 more items and run out

Kinda worried about going back desu. If they've been tracking me they could have a felony size case against me easy

>>13293971
What do you think that does to your self-esteem?

>>13293971
That's theft, though.

>go to the supermarket in France
>be at the check out machine
>read the instructions on screen
> يرجى تمرير المنتج على الماسح الضوئي
لإضافته إلى حساب
>the first item I scan is a bag of pork meat
>a loud alarm plays
>the sharia police arrives
>they see the non halal product
>get beheaded

>>13295841
The Walmart in the black/Hispanic near me has shut down completely. Every time I went there I’d see dozens of empty packages that the locals stole stuff out of. Now all of that location’s former patrons are ruining the two Walmarts that are closer to me

>>13293971
>devilish
>at Walmart
Way to stick it to the man.

>>13294239
>>13295776
>>13295784
Excuse me anons, I used to work on pic related. The way they work is every self checkout has a scale under the bagging area and a list of the past 20 or so acceptable weights for each barcode. That's why they all say "please place the item in the bag" after you scan something and won't let you scan the next item until you do. If you scan something then put two of that thing in the bagging area, the weight it sees will be more than whats in its list of weights so it will tell you to wait while it calls the cashier. BUT if the cashier approves the weight discrepancy then that weight you just put in the bag will be saved in its list, which means you can scan/bag the same thing again without an error. This also works if you're one of the first people to buy a new item that the checkout hasn't scanned enough of yet to save 20 acceptable weights for. Also produce doesn't have entries in the acceptable weights list since the weights vary so much. So after you put in a plu for produce it will ask you to place it on the scanner scale first, then it will look for that weight in the bagging area.

only poor bad people do this. congratulations on being a boil on society's ass that nobody will miss when you die.

>go to grocery store
>take a perishable item
>decide I don't want it
>leave it on the floor

>>13296021
>scan mckormick pepper container
>put a saffron in the bag, effectively saving 15$

>>13293971
So the cost of your integrity is $1.20lb? Shame.

>can't see PLU on my red pepper, so search by name
>2 normal options, neither distinguished from the other, plus organic
>pick one at random but price is higher than advertised
>ring up only one head of garlic instead of two to recoup my $.50
I don't care, this is justice

>>13293971
My favorite thread!
>inb4 300 posts of petty theft, arguing about store security, and shitposting about niggers

>>13293971
No thanks, I'm not a nigger.

>>13294562
I just tell them I don't own a television or computer lol

Mfw Walmart is putting in new scanners that sound an alarm if it thinks you pretended to scan something.

>>13295656
I only use the remotes because there's always a long gay line at the wagie conveyor belts and some retard always starts arguing about muh coupons and uncounted discounts with the clerk.

One of my favorite things to do is perform petty theft and arguing with store security. I also hate niggers.

>>13294562
I see those fuckers at Costco all the time

>>13296021
A lot of places have done away with the weight scale under the bags due to issues with keeping them calibrated.

>>13296548
They don't sound an alarm, they require employee assistance to continue. Which happens frequently because if the discount labels for clearance items don't completely cover the old barcode it will trigger the alert. Also there is nothing stopping you from simply dropping the item in the bag once the employee has walked off, since it requires you to scan it again but doesn't tell you.

>>13296662
>it doesn't sound an alarm, it just calls the lady over
So basically it alarms the attendant.... With an alarm

>go into Walmart
>Use womens restroom because i identify as one
>Don't flush
>Leave toilet seat up

>>13293971
>>at carrefour self-checkout
> don't go there because there's always an autist that tries a scam and he always gets caught

>>13294431
hello fellow masshole

>>13293971
It's justifiable since businesses factor in theft in the pricing. If you don't occasionally steal this way and are completely honest, the grocery is stealing from you. The only way you can argue against this kind of pilfering is by arguing that it's ok for the grocery to steal from you.

>Grab normal produce.
>Ring them up as organic anyway.

>>13296649
This. Most places don't use that method anymore because it was so fucking awful.

>>13296765
Mostly because people let their crotch spawn crawl all over the fucking scales, destroying them.
I lost count of the times I have seen people let kids jump on the bagging area. "Oh they are so rambunctious." No, they are past-term abortions you lazy fuck.

>>13295558
Is Harris Teeter a good place to shop pricewise? Been going to Aldi and Walshart but honestly sick of them being overrun with sheboons and their slew of niglets....

>Shop at Winco.
>Can't fuck with the prices because the place is too based.
>Stick a cart in the corral backwards.

>>13296039
yummy..... feet milk....

>>13296300
>that image
>that post
yikes

i love shoplifting, what a rush. i SHIT on corporate apologists

>>13293971
>checkout assistant checks receipt
>notices the wrong kind of apples
"Nice try nigger"
>get arrested and raped in Walmart prison

>>13294481
taxation is theft