/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>13216356
Are we gonna just ignore the glowing green eyes on this porker?

>>13216361
I'm colorblind, so I thought those were cherries. wtf?

>>13216361
They’re just mustard gas pods, pretty standard fare, you can make it at home

On closer inspection, the pictured pig has a tomato in its mouth.

I declare this picture cursed. The apple that is really a tomato, the glowing green eyes, the overall effect...there is something demonic at work here.

>>13216402
>>13216379
>>13216361
>>13216365
DO NOT QUESTION THE AUTHORITY OF THE PIG.

>>13216427
OH GOD, GALZE IT WITH FIRE!

>>13216356
are those green cherries?

>>13216467
They are windows into the undiluted satanic essence of Be'elzebub himself.

>>13216427
>I HAVE THE BODY OF A PIG

>>13216356
Once actually, it was interesting to see in person

>>13216356
Yes, but it didn't have an apple in it's mouth. Spit-roast pig over a charcoal fire is one of the greatest things I've ever eaten.

My dad promised to get me a roasted full suckling pig if I got above a 3.6 GPA in college. A figure which I exceeded at a GPA of 3.86. Which upon receiving and graduating, my family informed me they were just joking about giving me a suckling pig, or a party. So instead we had fried chicken (which I had to cook myself) and a couple of relatives over on the weekend.

This was significantly less disappointing than my mother and father forcing to sell my position in bitcoin to "focus on my studies" otherwise they would stop paying for my college and apartment. Haha thanks mom and dad!!! I totally didn't want to be a millionaire before i turned 25!

haha. HAHA.

>>13216427
We are lord of the flies.

idk if it's related but I cook chicken with a whole onion shoved in its chest cavity.

>>13216506
If there's one thing my parents taught me it's: anything you say can and will be used against you. No matter the context or the people.

>>13216506
>letting mommy and daddy dictate your investments

You got bullied out of a mansion

>>13216361
Those are limes

>>13216506
The eternal boomer strikes again!

>>13216553
>You got bullied out of a mansion
>a mansion
I had several thousand bitcoins, since I was an early adopter. I was bullied out of a life (and following dynasty) of luxury.

>>13216574
If it gives you heart now you might have a different perspective on a system that lets some toil their entire lives without much to show for it and lets others live in opulent luxury because they got lucky. Use this redpill wisely and for the betterment of the planet most dont get this far

>>13216595
Based

>>13216595
sleep tight porker

I had planned to and have a huge party
I was making the preparations but then my room mate went ahead and ended up buying one already roasted from a restaurant and then delivered for the party
the pig was only 30lbs and it cost him $400. I didn't pay him because he did that purchase without running it by me
and of course as food people we here all understand how much he grossly overpaid for it

know what the worst part about it was? everyone was too squeamish to eat it

fucking white people I swear

Anyone who's been to one of those hawaiian luau tourist trap dinners.

>>13216356
Whole pig? Sure. Specifically with the apple? No. In fact I don't think it's usually cooked with the pig and just added afterward.

>>13216506
fuck them out of their money since they fucked you out of yours
you know what they say: turnabout is fair play

>>13216506
why did you even feel the need to tell them about the bitcoin

>>13217710
I wanted them to invest so they could also benefit before the price took off. They didn't "get it" and threatened to make me homeless if I didn't stop "fucking around on the internet".

>>13216755
The luau at the polynesian resort at disney world in kissimmee is actually very very tasty. Or it was about 25 yrs ago when I tried it.

>>13216356
God i wish that were me

>>13216356
>Have you ever ACTUALLY seen or cooked a whole roast pig with an apple stuffed in its mouth

Yes I have seen it exactly once at a housewarming party thrown by an eccentric asian dude

Yeah, my hometown has a football (the European kind) tournament every Summer that ends with a feast of a whole roasted pig. The head is usually cut off and presented on the table with an apple in the mouth, and later when everybody's horribly drunk someone shows off by eating various bits of it.
It is not cooking with the apple, though.

im chinese, whole roast pig is common. not sure why you'd put an orange in their mouth though.

>>13217821

>Seafood

Wut

>>13217785
I don’t believe bdsm is a real fetish, I think it’s just fashionable sex for normies

>>13217845
its a sea pig

>>13217849
If you don't believe submission/dominance and powerful/powerless dichotomies have a role in sex you very obviously have never had sex. I don't hold that against you but maybe you should go around forming these little theories about the "normies" until you've had at least some experience with the subject.

>>13217821
Maybe it's for the same reason that they put tomatoes in the eyes.

>>13216356
no, but yes except for the apple part. It's porchetta.

>>13216506
how much bitcoin are we talking here? and what year?

>>13217849
BDSM can be artistic, but it is very much a real thing for many people. I miss having the power dynamic in my relationship.

>>13217868
I am going to hide the thread before he answers that. I don't think I want to know.

>>13217859
I’ve had sex and I’ve been around long enough to know people do lots of retarded shit just for the image of it, to the point where there is a large group, perhaps the majority of people, who are totally meme addled followers. And I think bdsm is the fashionable politically correct memester kink for this kind of person. It’s the fetish of people who wore supreme brand.

>>13217913
I'm sure some people do it as a fashion statement, but your original post suggested that's all it is, and that's very obviously not true.

>>13217913
The "normies" that show it off are the minority. There are far more people that practice it in private because it is still taboo, and can cause alienation from work and family. Or in some cases could cost you your job.

>>13216721
You can buy a 500lb hog and get the hog butchered for like $900 where I live

>>13216356
Yes

>>13216365
Green fake cherries

>>13216506
Shitty parents

Butchers in Germany that do catering often offer spit-roasted whole pigs/piglets. If presented on the table, it sometimes gets the apple.

>>13216427
Break out the apple sauce

>>13216504
Same here. Absolutely delicious. I have an uncle that raises pigs and we do one at every family reunion. The classic bits like the belly are incredible but the ears, jowls nose, and eyes are also fucking delicious

>>13217821
Same here, we do it for christmas.
It's enough to feed a family of 15 (with all the other food that Chinese families cook)

>>13218148
That smile.

>>13216506
I hope you're already planning for the day of the pillow. Otherwise just find a retirement home with an all black staff.

>>13216721
>fucking white people I swear
Change that to fucking Americans, you swine. Spanferkel (rotisserie whole pig) is a staple and delicacy in Germany. It ain't got nothing to with white, that's an American thing, that whole "eww I don't eat that" BS. The brits love blood sausage and haggis, the french eat snails and frogs.

>>13216721
Sounds very boomer tier to be scared of eating an animal without it being pre butchered. Where the hell do people think their meat comes from?

>>13216574
>several thousand bitcoin

We have great Cochinillo in central Spain. So tender they cut it with a dish just for the laughs.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f7i9SKhdzZk

Pigs are treated the worst from all farm animals. Makes me feel bad because they are very smart and delicious.

>>13216552
mom taught me this tying to send me to court for missing too much class
>>13218367
this is pure evil and I love it

>>13216427
galzed pig mmmm

>>13218400
BASED

friend of mine in Vermont use to do it every year. We'd all spend the day drinking beer and smoking next to the pig. One year it fell on the ground after breaking the folding table we tried to put it on and I ate part of its brain. good stuff

>>13216356
The scout camp I used to volunteer at for free monthly camping trips did a pig roast every summer until they received too many complaints from the hippy faggot parents that it was "inhumane".

They had always removed the head as well as the feet before it was brought out to the spit, though.

>>13220252
Vermont, eh? I guess that pig felt the bern

>>13220295

>>13216356
My sister had her wedding reception catered by one of those crews that do BBQ competitions. They did a whole hog, plus brisket, ribs, chicken, and all the usual sides. Shit was absolutely amazing, and there was still tonnes leftover at the end except for the pig. It didn't have an apple in its mouth, though, but I think it had an apple glaze.
We live in BC, but most of our family came from the Maritimes, if that's any reference for the demographic. Average age was probably 40+.

>>13216356
Hol up that a tomate not a apple.

I'm in a fantasy football league where we celebrate the end of the season with a full pig roast every year. We even go to a nearby farm and one of the members shoots the pig himself some years. Our friend flies in from LA to cook the whole thing overnight, and we've had a ton of celebrity/NFL cameos because the commissioner is rich and wasteful.

We have fire spinners and a bunch of other nonsense too. We were once on Sirius XM radio, and HBO threatened a lawsuit against us because the commissioner was trying to monetize content and our league was called "League of Thrones."

Lori Beth Denberg from All That attended one year. Anyways, he's quit the whole thing because he got sober, so it's not as cool now. But yeah, I have seen a fully roasted pig with an apple in its mouth.

Imagine having the full corpse of a formerly happy intelligent emotional animal before you, and still fail to grasp how you are no different than a chink dog eater.

>>13220775
Don't forget your B12 shot this month. Makes you less irritable.

>>13220775
I can't imagine being a white liberal who's so mentally fragile that they get triggered by what other cultures eat.

>>13220775
Yes white Liberal Jesus, please look down upon us! Save us from our evil backwards culture and our sins! Show us the light and the vegan way!

>>13220775
Imagine being this individual. Joyless, friendless, unloved, incapable of allowing others to have some happiness in their lives. All must be as miserable as this being. Now imagine nobody gave a shit anyway except to throw this sad-sack some sarastic derision on occasion.

>>13217859
Just proved the point normy scum go home

>>13216506
FUUUUUCKKK AAARGHHHH

>>13220775
The difference is that the Chinamen roast them alive.

>>13216356
no, smoked a whole hog for my wedding though.

>>13220775
I'd eat dog, too. What now bitch?

>>13216356
Yep, quite a few times in various countries. Common at fairs and such.

>>13219097
Do eurotrashers really?

>>13219097
>So tender they cut it with a dish just for the laughs.

>>13216476
Yeah, that was creepy

>>13221222
They aren't allowed to have knives, so.

>>13221269
creepy as fuck man

>>13216427
>>13216595
>>13218177

upvote

>>13216356
Filipino here, it depends really

>>13222527
Depends on what? Either you've seen it or you haven't.

Holy fuck I was just looking this up. They put the apple in for aesthetics, at first it was so gases released

Who would win, the Green Giant or the Red Terrors

Yes, Cambridge May balls have them almost compulsively.

>>13216595
Sleep tight porker

>>13222859
Green Giant. It's an Attack on Titan kind of situation, you'd need at least 6-7 Red Terrors to stand a chance.

>>13216356
No. Not with the apple.

Ive done the whole pig on a stick over a fire though.
No apple. If im roasting an apple im gonna roast it, no need to stick it in the pig's mouth.

>>13216356
My wife's filipina. We went there when our daughter turned 3 and I tried it for the first time. Was fucking great. The crackling and fat was amazing and the meat was like butter.

>>13222978
How's the marriage going?

>>13216356
Yes, a couple of years ago we had a Luau Christmas since my parents live in Florida, rented a big charcoal grill to fit the pig in and everything.

It wasn't all that great, not bad but honestly nothing special.

Finally a good thread

>>13222979
Great. 8 years, two children, she'll still suck my dick whenever I want.

Can't ask for more than that.

I want to eat some boar like obelix