/ck/ - Food & Cooking

nobody values your opinion, hole

>>12517190
*farts*

t. NEET incel trying to troll a blue board. I am a total asshole to waiters/waitresses and none of my girlfriends including my babymommas have cared. Cucking a beta waiter or delivery boy is so fucking funny

ITT: OP saw the bountiful (you)s harvest in the other thread with the alleged waitress and wanted to get in on it

>>12517190
you're a guy, but for your effort here's your (you)

>>12517190
>le thinly veiled falseflagging /r9k/ loser piece of shit thread

>>12517190
>drinking anything other than water
enjoy heart disease

>>12517209
appreciate the sentiment, but you can do that and also write 'sage' in the option field to avoid bumping these low quality threads you want to reply to

>>12517190

I'm glad I'm an actual faggot because women are disgusting.

>>12517190
dilate

>>12517190
I'd probably ghost you kek

>>12517190
>when he won’t leave you alone
>when he types “haha” and “lol” in every text

>>12517190
get a life redditor.

>>12517190
> no water
> no soda
> no cheap beer
> no fruity cocktail

What the fuck am I supposed to drink during the date then? Exactly what you want me to, it sounds like. Maybe you shouldn't be so controlling.

>>12517190
aaaaand what did YOU do to bring the value to the date?

>>12517190
>>Orders water
>>Date is ANYTHING but a dinner date
>>Date is less than $50
>>Orders on the cheap
>>Drinks coke or cheap beer
>>Orders any "fruity" cocktail
>>Orders sickeningly sweet desserts
>>Choice of restaurant is a meme or shitty ethnic place

SHUT YOUR WHORE MOUTH, BITCH. YOU DON'T SPEAK FOR US.
t.been happily married over 15 years to my husband, and you're going to end up alone and sad if you keep up with all these idiotic "rules".
Some of these are acceptable (like picky eaters being a big no, and non-tippers), but most of what you typed is your own neurotic bullshit, not all women. You don't speak for us.

>>12517190
>femanon here

women are such me mes. all for themselfs. Being a woman doesn't make you superior over everyone else.

>>12517261
at least this thing calling itself a woman anyways.

>>12517190
Good thing I don't have to put up with your stupid rules and lard ass since I already have a cute girlfriend.

>>12517190
post feet

>>12517224
post feet

>>12517190
Leave it to a woman to repeat literally everything most men know through sheer common sense.

>>12517190

>>12517200
>babymommas
Nigger detected

>Femanon here
lost interest here.

>>12517260

>>12517224
Haha wouldn't it be weird if someone sniffed your asshole hahahah

>>12517190
You're not female, I am, and I much prefer making something at home with a person I met instead of going out to eat. If we have to go out then we split the bill.

You're just a complete silly-willy trying to bait for (You)s and it's clearly working.

>>12517190
I get bored of women really quickly

And when I force myself to stay, its pointless because women have that intuition and pick up my fakeness, and get nervous and shit. Sometimes they just dump me first.

Like damnit woman. Cant you see im trying here.

kys coal burner. sage

>>12517190
why are you posting on 4chin when you're supposed to be in the kitchen making sammiches????
also, show bobs and vagene

all women ITT post feet
thank

Let me preface this by saying that it’s my body, and I do what I want to with it. Only God may judge me. Fuck any haters!

I’m an escort, or a call girl if you must, and I’m ruthless with who I accept as clients. I only sleep with someone if they are on a similar level of intelligence, highly successful in business or if they are extremely good looking. That way I can be sure that I am not lowering myself in any way. If you aren’t at the top of your game why would I accept your money to fuck me?

I have a couple of tattoos, classy ones BTW, and they enhance every aspect of my body!!

I've cut out two or three different friend groups and a few family members (including my father) because of how negative, bitter and cynical they are. I don't want that shit in my life.

I don't drink alcohol and rarely go out drinking, spend very little money on clothes, I don't have a car and use public transport and I still live with my parents. This means I save a lot of money while being able to eat high.

I go to counseling / therapy and have went for years and spend a lot of time on self care / introspection. This means I get to have a positive mindset and why other people act like idiots. I think everybody could benefit from therapy, it's the people who think they don't need therapy are the ones you need to worry about.

I don’t waste time on small talk, you know why you’re paying me, and I’m charging high by the hour, I’m talking more than $50 per hour here, so I don’t want people wasting my time.
I have a large debt from my younger days and I’m paying it off each month, though im still waiting for that prince to sweep me away and save me, not that I’m looking for a saviour, I’m perfect as I am.
A lot of people consider me to be a quiet and Mousey girl, and I conform to those restrictions since they suite me just fine.
A lot of people, mainly virgins, call me a roastie, but fuck them. Actually I’m not, so it’s even more painful for them.

>>12517190

>>12517190
Whatever. Nobody cares about a cunt like you. I'd ghost you first, bitch.

>>12517190
Get me a beer and a cig, and change that screaming brat's diaper while you're at it, bitch.

>>12517190

>>12517190
>or go bowling
You can talk while bowling, you know.
Its a lot easier to talk while playing a game, it gives you something to focus on, and you can see how good a sport the other person is. And most bowling places have food too.

>anything else that I could already do with friends
>she doesn't eat dinner with her friends
Shit friend detected.

>>12517190
real femanon here. heres a shitty dinner date in a nutshell (RE: dont do any of this shit and youll be fine)
>treat the waitstaff like shit/gripe about the food service in general
>talk about what a connoisseur you are of whatever shit you're eating. everyone has eaten steak before, darrin, and no one gives a fuck. stop being a pretentious faggot.
>be a picky eater, or so much as utters the phrase "rabbit food" ever in his life
>has no awareness of proper table manners/eats like a fucking child/doesnt seem to know what a napkin is or is used for
>be an utter buffoon with your eating utensils
>fried ANYTHING anywhere on your plate. may as well go to a fucking mcdonalds and ask for a large cup of frier oil to go, you fat fuck.

>>12517190
why is there a wojack version of Jessica from DQ8?

>>12517190

I get so sick of incompetent women OP. Let me give you some personal insight on the matter.

I've been with my wife for 10 years now. We met in high school, and I got her pregnant.
She is and always has been a lazy person and a shit cook. I wouldn't even mind eating shit food if she at least made it on time. But she rarely did.

We'd get into screaming arguments constantly about how lazy and worthless she was. I felt like an asshole for it, but goddamn she was a real piece of work. The only reason I dealt with all this was for the kids, and also because the sex is great.

But one night, I got fed up. Not only did she get drunk, neglect the kids, and made me top Ramen for dinner, but she decided to give me attitude too. She was being real fucking bitchy. So I told my grandparents to keep an eye on the kids and told my wife we were going to go out and have dinner together. I drove maybe 3 blocks to a quiet area (we live in Oregon, it's not hard to find a quiet field) and I got out of the car, went around like I was going to open her door for her and let her out, and I just beat the shit out of her while she was still seatbelted. After a few punches, I asked her if she wanted to go back to her parents. She started screaming and yelling and said yes, so I beat the shit out of her again. Then I asked her what she wanted to do. She finally got smart and said she wanted to go home. So I took her home and dared her to start trouble. I even handed her my cellphone and dialed her mom's number on the drive home. I made her talk to her mom, while daring her to fucking say something.

Before that incident, I had never laid a hand on her. But I had always threatened it. I told her "one of these days, if you don't straighten up, I'm going to lay hands on you."

All my meals have been on time, and she just recently tried to make a meatloaf. It was mediocre, but I was just thrilled that she tried.

Do with this information what you will.

>>12517524
this is my first time on /ck/ but I feel like I have seen this pasta at least 5 times

>>12517190
>Femanon here.

>>12517190
having seen your thought process, i'd be very okay with you ghosting me provided i dont do it first, ofc

>>12517190
I'm not spending $50 on a first date. We go out for coffee, that's it.

post vagina (dilated)

>>12517190
tits or gtfo
sage

>>12517190
You are one judgmental cunt.

Also tits or gtfo.

Hello would any femanons like to be my e-gf?

>>12517440
>>12517440
>That way I can be sure that I am not lowering myself in any way
except when taking cock in the ass

Unironically based

>>12517524
This pasta is so stale.

>>12517440
>, it's the people who think they don't need therapy are the ones you need to worry about.
Truer words have never been spoken.

>>12517190
t. roastie

>>12517200
>and none of my girlfriends including my babymommas have cared.

i have no idea what you're talking about but i have hard on

>>12517469
>>fried ANYTHING anywhere on your plate. may as well go to a fucking mcdonalds and ask for a large cup of frier oil to go, you fat fuck.
I was with you until this. There's quite a few high end / gourmet dishes that use frying as technique. You just proved how uncultured you yourself are by using that as a restriction. Everything else was acceptable, but you had to fuck it up at the end.

>>12517634
She may not do that. Every escort/call girl/high end prostitute has their own set of rules and what they will and won't do.

>>12517190
women are insufferable cunts. next

>>12517190

these are honestly good and sensible tips.

now if only i knew a girl i could ask out.

>>12517572
you sound mad, did someone hurt you?

>>12517190

god you sound like a right cunt, i bet you did most of those guys a favour ghosting them jeez.

What exactly goes wrong in a young man's early childhood development that one day he wakes up and decides "yes, today I will go on 4chan and make a post where i pretend to be a woman so I can get some sweet (You)s".

>>12517720

yes they are.

but they do have cunts which i need to stick my pickle into so i'llj put up with their inane bullshit.

>>12517241
sweet tea, nigger

>>12517736
Some ugly entitled cunt aka OP

>>12517440
So exactly how stupid does a client need to be to creampie your butthole?

>>12517739
It's called being bored and easily amused. Welcome to the Internet, by the way.

>>12517257
I always knew there were genuine soccer moms on this board

>>12517775
Honey, I was never a soccer mom.

>>12517190
I won't even interact with a girl IRL unless she's just eaten a full Carolina Reaper pepper. Yikes.

>Femanon here
This is bait and this isn't how women think. Go read crystal.cafe to get real female opinions on this kind of shit.

sage

>>12517784
What kind of behemoth suv do you drive, soccer mom?

>>12517784
Soccer mom, regular mom, what's the difference? My point is I always knew they were here somewhere