/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Do americans really do this???

>>12443675
>tfw American and loves cakes
>no good bakeries nearby
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! The best bakery I know is like 2 cities south

More like this is what cake amounts to anywhere outside of France. The only real cakes I've had were pound cakes my grandmother used to make. Anyway we don't really eat cake, it's a birthday party food, those are all kid's birthday cakes more or less.

>america
>anglo

>>12443700


They have the same disgusting cakes in the whole white anglosphere.

Meanwhile in France...

>>12443675
They use royal icing, which is loaded with sugar, made with hydrogenated palm oil, and disgusting to save money and extend shelf life instead of Italian or Swiss meringue, which are what you're supposed to be using.

For me, it is princess cake

>>12443776
God why is almond so fucking delicious...

O B S E S S E D
B
S
E
S
S
E
D

>>12443696

Hispanic bakeries are pretty good

>inb4 fuck dirty illegal spics and they need to go back, btw, I hate /pol/

>>12443840
fuck dirty illegal spics, they need to go back

>>12443840
Ironically two cities down is where all the hispanics live.

Fondant gets used a lot

>>12443675
Why did Trump and Melania totally outclass your so called French President and his whoar looking wife today at rememberances in France?
Deal with it or don't.

It's a country for simple food and cakes need patience, time, effort and experience

Obsessed.

>>12443896

>still allowed to show their own flag

but don't you know that's RACIST???

>>12443931
That's why you folk need brexit.
I wouldn't have gotten into that in the first place, but then there you are.
Deal with it.

>>12443698
not the only one who used to love a nice pound from yer nan

>>12443931
It happens here in the USA as well, some little twat gets offended at our flag usually a fucking sand nigger muslim and shit goes to hell because nobody is willing to tell them to shut the fuck up. Same with assholes that want to ban Christmas.

>>12443728
Don't eat them then, I don't. >>12443698 is right - it's mostly OTT stuff for kids (or maybe fifth gender fatties). There are more elegant constructions if you insist on eating cake.

This. Why are american cakes all fucking sponge cakes?

>>12445333
Easier and cheaper for Tyson to manufacture in their automated factory.

>>12445333
What about pound cakes, bundt cakes, angel food cakes, upside down pineapple cake, cheese cake, chocolate lava cakes, ice cream cake, red velvet cake, black forest cake, jelly roll cakes, flourless chocolate cake, etc.

france put frogs and snails on their cakes so?

>>12443728
ddd

>>12443675
You don't have to get a college degree to work at a bakery in the US.

>>12443675

Nice cherrypicking OP. Care to see mine?

Sheet cakes works in terms of catering events and your guest want dessert. Call it the safe option but it is all fun and games until someone has to pay a few hundred for multiple premium cakes.

Only millenials with no prospects will go out of their way to spend 30 dollars on your fancy cakes

>>12443743
meme fiue is possibly the worst taste- effort ratio food in the world

>>12443675
Russian here, literally what is wrong is supposed to be wrong with this picture?
Is this the usual french bitterness about everything?

remember to lacquer your fruit.

>>12445720
all those animal faces look like they're having sex

I like cakes with jelly instead of frosting. Far too often frosting feels slimy and gross in my mouth.

black forest > carrot cake > cheesecake > other cakes >>>>> your favorite cake

>>12445960
Imagine being this much of a flyover.

>>12445773
Look at the one that's cut into, and remember that the picture is the lap-of-luxury version. It's almost always sickly-sweet English pound cake with a single inch-thick layer of sugared crisco between - minimal layering or cook's technique, a bread which is neither dense nor fluffy, moist nor toothy, fillings out of a plastic tub, and an apologetic sprinkling on top of whole pieces of other, more appealing confectionery.

It's basically the least-effort-possible version of an Englishman's imitation of the outside of an Italian cake, bodged with grease paste and an abject refusal to let children be corrupted by the demon rum. You should be able to understand what's wrong with that.

>>12445927

i count 3 pepe the frog cakes in that picture

>>12443840
Rent free

>>12443692
yes.
>>12443675
it's because the 'cake' acts as a carrier for oil and sugar, which caters to america's stress eating/ get-it-over-with attitude towards everything worth doing slowly/ american's hatred of dietary science, etc.
You get get butter creme cake, pound cake, and better quality cake, but they're pretty expensive for the amount. american's never really evolve past their childhood birthday cake.

>>12443840
I have tried mexican baked good only once - a bun with stripped pink icing and a cinammon spiced crumb. It seems that mexican stuff is more spice centric than sweet. Can you recommend any item in particular?

>>12443962
between cops mutilating the colors into white, black and blue for that 'back the blue' propaganda shit, or the conserviatards using a flag as a substitute for a developed opinion, the american flag is owned by the right wingers at this point.
it's like a physical manifestation of the pledge. It's pretty, but it's a lie.

>>12443675
Ate some pastries in France and they were pretty good, but nothing absolutely amazing compared to eating American cakes my whole life.

Still though, not about to claim American cakes are amazing. Tiramisu & crème brûlée are the only deserts that actually deserve being called great, since everything else is just trying to be as sweet and calorie dense as humanely possible. Maybe you could argue a good, homemade pie is deserving of praise, but no pie could ever be as perfectly crafted and complex in flavor as an artisan-crafted tiramisu.

>>12446306
>>12443675
Also this restaurant called "Fruit Paradise" or "Paradise of Fruit" however you want to translate it had the most absolutely bland and horribly cooked food I've ever had in a proper restaurant. Everything was just plain garbage, somehow worse than the worst American restaurant I've ever eaten at, Applebee's, which is saying quite a lot.

Does not help that the only sauce they offered was an "American sauce" which was just mayonnaise. What the fuck is with you Euros and mayonnaise?

>>12446306
>meme brulee
>the most basic custard dessert every country on earth has its own version of
>great

>>12446329
Simple done great is unarguably good at all times, in all things. Insanely hard to fuck up a custard and the portions are generally reasonable, compared to what American restaurants like to call "gourmet desserts".

Truly you are correct though, I was a little too specific. I'll stand by Tiramisu being the best dessert to ever exist but I have had some specialties in places like high-brow Brazilian steakhouses that were pretty good. Still nothing that took actual skill in preparing but again, neither does creme brulee.

>>12446329
Honestly though there's no way you're about to tell me this type of shit has anything on a well done creme brulee.

>>12443896
>thread about cake
>"muh trump"

plebbit plz go

>>12446344
It tastes better

>>12443675
I can't tell if those cakes are disgusting. They just have icing on them. They could be good or bad, I don't know. I don't know that American cake is disgusting. I know that Twinkies are bad cake, but I doubt that is representative of American cake.

>>12446270
Can't get much good stuff that isn't Americanized outside of South Texas, but if you get the chance get some pumpkin and meat empanadas.

>>12443754
Cakes are mainly for children's birthday parties. Do you think kids give a single fuck about Italian or Swiss meringue?

>>12445766
based

>>12443675
Why do stinky euros keep making these threads?

>>12443840
Mexican baked goods are the only part of Mexican food that I think is just not that good. I once had some pretty good Mexican ginger cookie type stuff, but most of what they make is dry and bland.

>>12446306
tiramisu is literally the easiest dessert in the world to make. everything you have said is wrong and shit

Cake is good, French people are annoying. I eat cake in America.

>>12446341
tiramisu is something you eat in a cafe, not a fucking fine dining establishment

pie is better than cake here in America.

>>12445927
I wish that was me...

>>12446306
>Tiramisu & crème brûlée are the only deserts that actually deserve being called great
>complex in flavor as an artisan-crafted tiramisu
Jesus fucking Christ, why aren‘t flyovers euthanized at birth yet?

>>12443692
>>12443675
>>12443696
NJ here. I notice this in every bakery. I also don't think i've ever had a good donut either. I will never have a good dessert :(

>>12446329
There's a reason every country on earth has their own variation retard

>>12443675
Literally none dessert can be disgusting. It's just sugar and shit. Get on with it.

>>12443675
Shartburger here, I agree that the cakes are fucking nasty. It's most likely because, in our superficiality, we care more about how the cake looks than how it tastes (see: fondant). It could be derived from our revolting anglo roots, that I don't know for sure.

I'd take cookie cake or ice cream cake over our tradional cakes any day. They're all shit, it doesn't matter if you go to a boutique bakery or not. Fuck this country.

>>12443743
looks delicious

ITT: Euro-tards who eat plain and dry cakes
>>12447400
We know you're a Bong, lefty.

>>12443675
HFCS
Ours in the UK aren't amazing but fuck me. American desserts are just VILE, their chocolate is like candle wax

>>12443696
just bake your own
if you're in portland an xuyen is a pretty good french style vietnamese bakery

>>12446270
Those two things don't sound mexican

>>12447871
You don't sound very Mexican.

>>12445924
>The green stuff not removed
Go to hell

>>12447877
Yo quiero Taco Bell

>>12446323
"Paradise of Fruit" is a shit restaurant chain idk what you were expected senpai

>Be French
>Finest cuisine in the world
>Snails drowned in butter
>Fatty meat drowned in butter
>Fatty goose liver so rich you can't eat more than a fingernail's worth
>Invent croissants, pastry that's 50+% butter by weight
>Invent brioche, bread that's 50+% butter by weight
>Use buttercream; literally just butter, powdered sugar, and heavy cream
>"Hon hon hon, we are so brilliant"
>Be American
>"What if we used royal icing instead of that butter icing?"
>Frenchmen "Do Americans really? Fat asses. Viva la Franc. Reeeeeeee."

t. American baker who worked with primarily french baked goods. You fucking frogs love butter more than anything else.

>>12443840
based
even the shadiest bodega bakery in the slums of the dirtiest corner in town can produce some top tier shit that BTFOs anything from your typical chain store

>>12443698
>More like this is what cake amounts to anywhere outside of France.
You clearly haven't been to Austria.

desu I'm french and I'd gladly eat all these american cakes here

>>12447041
t. an 8 year old.

I like cuban bakeries a lot desu

>>12445656
Many of those are varieties of sponge cake, you silly goose.

>be euro
>can get delicious-ass cake and other baked goods every-fucking-where
>move to ameriland
>only one place in my big-ass city makes cakes like back home
>closes : (
>another place makes cakes almost as good but not quite
>it's okay, i guess
>no place makes bread like back home

I miss fruits and vegetables from back home more than cakes and bread, tho.

>>12448140
Go back then, fatty

>>12447999
Cuz fat doesn't make you fat eating mass quantities does. If your food is so rich you can only eat a little bit you'll end up eating less calories.

>>12448143
>anon wants to eat vegetables more than cake
>hurr durr you want to eat vegetables so you must be fat
wut

>>12443840
You know.. Those dirty illegal spics sure need to go back

>>12447414
OI WUD YU LOIK SOM STAHGUYZY POI?

>>12448615
>cornwall
crazy celts

Americans do not see cakes and desserts to be on the same level as other forms of cooking. All they ask for a cake is for it to be sweet, use certain classic ingredients and that's about it. They are more ceremonial than something they actually enjoy.
They also think of cake as a base you can add flavor to; a genre of food, not specific dishes, unlike European desserts that show different flavors, structures and concepts while identifying and naming each one as it's own thing, thus each concept is able to evolve and create robust identities.
And just like with animation, they think they are only for children, so why wound they try?
Exhibit A >>12445720

>>12447021
The sweet bread culture of dirty illegal spics (who need to go back) evolved alongside chocolate and other sweet drinks, they are meant to be eaten together and they are also eaten at the beginning of meals, not the end, thus they are pretty simple.
And they also have the same standards for desserts as Americans, Mexico's sweet tooth is filled with candy and fruit, pastries and similar are often forgotten as there are very few Mexican desserts.
I have had great Mexican sweet breads (made by me), but desserts are are often ignored, what we are good at are candies.

>>12446270
Dead bread - Ceremonial sweet buns perfumed with orange bosom and decorated to represent human bones
Cochinitos/Puerquitos - soft Cinnamon and piloncillo (dry molases) shortbread cookies in the shape of pigs
Rosca de reyes - Ceremonial bread in the shape of a ring to symbolize God's infinite love. modern variations are stuffed with fruit, chocolate, nuts, etc. They also have a clay or plastic (heat proof plastic) baby Jesus on the inside
Yolk bread - Soft and dry bread, it can absorb an obscene amount of chocolate or any other drink you pair it with
Coyotas - Shortbread empanadas stuffed with piloncillo or cajeta
Mantecadas - Moist muffins, usually very simple

>>12448147
Who said anything about butter and fats being bad? The French are just hypocrites for calling American baked goods disgusting for all the sugar when French ones are almost nothing but butter. Drowning anything in butter or sugar is equally as nasty, it doesn't matter how 'traditional' it is.

>>12443840
fuck dirty illegal spics and they need to go back, btw Mexican baked goods are the dryest shit you'll ever see, eating them makes me more dehydrated than a night of liquor and dph.

>>12446344
Dude there's no way you're trying to say a fucking cream bruly has shit on a well done skillet cookie.

>>12446270
Sounds like a concha

>>12443675
Why do french people smell bad?

>>12447208
If you live in the good part of NJ, go get a stock's pound cake right across the bridge. That shit is dope, best cake I've ever bought.

>>12450130
sadly no

but have you ever heard of Mr. Cupcakes? They're pretty bomby.

>>12443896
post the real pic