/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Apply blackface before going into the restaurant so they'll think you can handle it

maybe they just dont give a shit.

next time just make your order and at the end say "diu lay lo mo" they will know what to do

sprinkle chili on it yourself, retard

ask for extra chili oil

>>12438275
at my local joint i tell them "3 times spicy" and now they get it. if you just say extra spicy they don't really do anything.

>>12438312
you mean "cao ni ma"?

>>12438292
>how to get kicked out of any Chinese restaurant

>>12438395
yours is mandarin, his is cantonese

>>12438411
Those are two names for the same fucking language, brainlet amerimutt

>>12438417
>same language
yikes
your ignorant is showing

>>12438417
But that's not right at all, are you retarded?

>>12438417
diu lei lo mo on9 hai

>>12438458
Ching Chong ting tong peepee size of gnat

>>12438472
我肏你妈个屄

Tell them "actually spicy - not white people spicy"
If they laugh, then they understand and you get your spicy food.
This has worked at my local Chinese, Thai, Vietnamese, and Indian restaurants.

They adjust it because they're probably tired of dumb ass people that complain it's too spicy and return the food.

>>12438417
Top shelf bait

>>12438275
easy, they will consider you one of their own and make it spicy as such.

>>12438402
Then you sue them for racism.

>>12439085

>>12438488
tiananmen massacre great leap forward etc

>>12439126
Tiananmen Massacre is a boomer now. It turned 30 a few days ago.

>>12438275
speak chinese

>>12439193
Yuck

>>12438352
3 spicy for free? I'm gonna call you round-eye 3 spicy for free.

>>12439135
30 is millennial, you dumb fuck

Apparently the term 'native Thai' works at Thai places.

>>12438275
You have to ask for 'Ham Lung'

>>12438275
order in chinese

get delivery and give them a ghetto or chinese name

>>12438275
Lawsuits. At the end of the day it's not a wise business decision to let pussy westerners have something as possibly compromising as real actually spicy food to the general public, sure this hurts you the individual but protects the business on a wider scale

Learn enough chinese to directly speak with the manager and tell him that you're dissatisfied with the lack of spicyness in your food and want it very spicy like in china in mandarin or just deal with it

>>12438275
Go make a custom order of General Tso's and tell them that you need it Xtimes as spicy as they usually make it because you really haven't had a very spicy one in a long time and you miss the heat.

>>12438275
If you sat down in the restaurant, you'd have a bowl of chili paste on the table, and you'd ladle out a spoonful to your plate, and dip your fork into the chilies before each bite.
Ask for chili paste on the side when you get takeout.
General Tso's isn't a dish you order in the range of spicy, but you ask for them to add whole dried chilies or just order szechuan chicken like you should.

>>12438275
ask if they have spicy chili oil, or just buy a jar of this stuff from amazon
makes it much better

>>12439126
姦恁娘老膣屄

>>12438275
Mine just gives me some dried red chilis. They aren't that hot tho.

>>12439286
You have to go back

drop some kickin' 'vark on it, my dudette

>>12440178
this stuff is godsend but if you add it after it was cooked it just tastes bad
you have to add it before it went in the pan and let it cook with it
it isn't a condiment moreso it is an ingredient like sambal

>>12440647
i agree but chinks don't
they use commonly it (and sambal) as a condiment

>>12440581
>you have to go back
>for not playing along with my retard newfag memes

>>12440178
>Forgot what this stuff was called
>Search "angry grandma sauce"
>First result
kek

>>12440153
That's a Vietnamese restaurant.
>>12440178
>needing to go online to order angry grandma sauce
Yikes.

>>12438275
chao ji fei chang zhen ta ma de la

i can provide tones if you like but your white ass wouldnt understand them anyways

>>12440919
and a ching chong nip nong to you too young man

>>12440919
>chao ji fei chang zhen ta ma de la
Don't say this, makes mustard gas.

>>12440930
No I was being helpful, it means 'super extremely really fucking spicy'

use with caution

>>12438312
Do NOT do this OP!
I tried it at my local restaurant, I wanted some spicy food, and they kicked me out!
They were yelling at me in Chinese, one of them said something in English about the waiter's mother being dead??? and now I'm banned from China Cottage

Seriously, fuck you for telling me to say that

>>12440930
Shut the fuck up you racist cunt.

>>12438312
Don't say this, it tells them to release mustard gas in your food.

>>12440976
diu lay lo mo

>>12438275
1.) Go to China Town
2.) Take Live Bite out of Squid, Show them how much of a man you really are
3.) Chinese will show you the real secret menu for non-whites

>>12440990
Isn't that guy Japanese?
He's got a wider face, a pug-nose and strong cheekbones

>>12440989
Fuck you it's not funny
There's like 10 other Chinese places near my house but that one was my favorite
What did I say to them anyway?

>>12441002
No. He is a Korean. He had some surgery.

>>12441013
Why would a Korean want to look like a Jap?

Look them directly in the eyes (important) and say "ching chang bing bang bong". Makes you honorary Chinese for the rest of the day

>>12441007
>What did I say to them anyway?
>did
Schizophrenic much?
Your story is pretty funny. Keep it up!

>>12441017
Why not?

>>12441028
Every time I see them on /int/ they act like they hate each other

>>12441032
It's just foreplay.

Maybe order a real spicy dish

>>12438402
Right, forgot the chinks hate niggers

>>12438275
Dude, I am at the point where I request the cook to "make it the spiciest dish they've ever cooked", and emphasize that point. I went to a curry place, they served heat 1-10 on the menu, I asked for 12 and it came back mild. Complained and they told me that they offer 1-100 on the secret menu. So I'm done with that bullshit. If you want it spicy just tell them to make it the hottest they've ever made. Sometimes it still won't be hot enough but I've legit had a restaurant redo their heat scales after seeing me dissapointed.

Hot Chinese food does chilli more than spice. Ask for extra chili oil, maybe they even sell jars of it to take home

>>12438275
Go to a thai place

>>12441224
Do they make General Tso's Chicken spicy?

>>12438275
Why not buy some actually good Chinese food?

>>12441348
Anybody who claims to not like General Tso is an absolute liar. It's impossible to not enjoy. It's a wonderful creation.

>>12441353
General Tso is a shitlord

>>12441353
I'm only lying a little bit. I like sesame chicken and other basic shit, but after having the real stuff, I can't go back.

>>12438312
Careful with that request they will put really spicy sichuanpeppers inside your food if you tell them this

White guy here. Just came to say I always send it back if it's too spicy. I'm why you have to jump through hoops to get spicy food. Haha.

>>12441353
this
chinks even like it as well

there are -seriously- franchises in china which sell western chinese food to chinese people and those franchises have stores in western countries so they are chinese food for western people for chinese people for chinese people in the west

>>12438275
>What's the fucking secret?!

try this:
you makie hottie
you makie hottie,now!

you may thank me later

>>12441564
its fine as long as they don't put gutter oil in it

>>12441576
Haha diu lay lo mo.

>>12440981
massively triggered slanty detected, lmao

>>12440981
You seem to be the racist, as is very common with your types. I simply don't give a shit about your fucking nations and don't want to visit them.
If you want to call me racist for disagreeing with you then you must have been shillary supporters since that's the best that they can do.
Are you still seething in your closets because Trump beat your annointed one?

>>12438812
He wishes.

>>12441007
Ask Google.

Bring a gun.

white ppl baka

>>12440178
If you guys consider this spicy then that's exactly why Chinese restaurants won't make it "spicy" for you

>>12438402
Fuck you, you nigger loving creep.

>>12438292
Nah, blacks think red vinegar and seasoning salt are spicy.

>>12438275
What is General Tso’s? We don’t have it in bongland but it looks similar to Kung Po or sweet ‘n’ sour.

>>12438292
Don’t. I tried this in Greg’s.

>>12441581
Reminds me of the Heinz bean made in the US, exported to the UK, and then imported to the US for UK expats.

>>12442301
You already answered your own question. General Tso is the guy who is famous for his sweet ‘n’ sour chicken.

>>12438275
>reee my Americanized insectoid food isn’t authentic enough

>>12442341
Aah. They give us vegetables and pineapple in S&S chicken over here. I suppose Americans would rather have more sugar (substitute) instead.

>>12442327
The Heinz baked beans we eat in Britain are made in Britain. Cool little anecdote apart from that though.

>>12442397
>britbong unironically feels superior because his sugar cornstarch msg food colouring sauced battered deep fried cat meat from the chink trough is 'healthier' than the near identical amerilard version

>>12442402
Hm, perhaps I'm conflating it with something else.

>>12438275
Just ask for a side of hot peppers or hot pepper oil and add it yourself you fucking cunt. They don't want stuff being send back by assholes.
You could also just say "Thai Style."

>>12442442
Well then I'll send it back for not being spicy enough
The customer is always right.

>>12440903
>when you forgot what that awesome high school band people post in /mu/ cringe threads was but you search "hey this is pretty good not cringe at all" and time machine modulus is the first result

>>12441726
"Diu Lei Lo Mo!" (屌你老母or 𨳒你老母, "fuck your mother") is a highly offensive profanity in Cantonese when directed against a specific person instead of used as a general exclamation.

>>12442516
Next time you're there you'll get that extra special Poo Poo Platter.

>>12438275
Chink here. If your local Chinese resultant serves general tso's chicken/orange chicken or any of that other garbage it's not an actual Chinese restaurant, it's a restaurant that serves over priced food that white people like to pretend is Chinese food. I'd suggest making some chink friends, they don't have to be FOBs, ABCs work fine, and going to that same restaurant with them. I've seen from some of my white friends that once they go to their favorite Chinese restaurants with me we're offered the secret Chinese only menu (this is an actual thing I personally didn't even know about it until I was in high school and my dad asked a waitress for the "Chinese menu" at a restaurant one time), get better service, and the majority of places will even take anywhere from 5 to 10% off your bill if you pay cash (to skirt the IRS and taxes).

>>12442729
>Chink here

Opinion discarded

>>12442737
>a Chjnk's opinion is disgarded in a thread about the discussion of Chinese food
Good one bro.

>>12442737
cao ni ma

>>12442746
I don’t listen to bug people.

>>12442749
The fuck is that shit? Am I supposed to be epic owned by this or something?

>>12442737
you have to be 18 to use this site

>>12442772
Really, why?

>>12442758
That's good, because I'm an American, which means you have to listen to me.

>>12442749
>>12442758
I promise you if you Google'd half the things you read on 4chan that you don't understand, even if it's in a foreign language, you'd find much more success in life

>>12442758
>The fuck is that shit? Am I supposed to be epic owned by this or something?
>using sarcasm to cover his insecure personality
You've already got owned, pretentious little man.

>>12442729
Cringe

>>12438312
Don't do it OP. That's Chinese for "can you add mustard gas to this general tso's chicken".

>>12442916
"And also, please diu lay lo mo. Thank you."

It would be cool if there was a Tiananmen Square dish that looked liked pic related, true Chinese food.

>>12442916
It's pretty good with some Colman's.

>>12442729
>befriend subhumans
Sorry m80, I’d rather spend time with basketball enthusiasts than you fucks.

>>12443159
??

>>12440781
>t. 2016 r/TheDonald transplant

动态网自由门 天安門 天安门 法輪功 李洪志 Free Tibet 六四天安門事件 The Tiananmen Square protests of 1989 天安門大屠殺 The Tiananmen Square Massacre 反右派鬥爭 The Anti-Rightist Struggle 大躍進政策 The Great Leap Forward 文化大革命 The Great Proletarian Cultural Revolution 人權 Human Rights 民運 Democratization 自由 Freedom 獨立 Independence 多黨制 Multi-party system 台灣 臺灣 Taiwan Formosa 中華民國 Republic of China 西藏 土伯特 唐古特 Tibet 達賴喇嘛 Dalai Lama 法輪功 Falun Dafa 新疆維吾爾自治區 The Xinjiang Uyghur Autonomous Region 諾貝爾和平獎 Nobel Peace Prize 劉暁波 Liu Xiaobo 民主 言論 思想 反共 反革命 抗議 運動 騷亂 暴亂 騷擾 擾亂 抗暴 平反 維權 示威游行 李洪志 法輪大法 大法弟子 強制斷種 強制堕胎 民族淨化 人體實驗 肅清 胡耀邦 趙紫陽 魏京生 王丹 還政於民 和平演變 激流中國 北京之春 大紀元時報 九評論共産黨 獨裁 專制 壓制 統一 監視 鎮壓 迫害 侵略 掠奪 破壞 拷問 屠殺 活摘器官 誘拐 買賣人口 遊進 走私 毒品 賣淫 春畫 賭博 六合彩 天安門 天安门 法輪功 李洪志 Winnie the Pooh 劉曉波动态网自由门

>>12438275
make it yourself, stupid

Tell them to give your food the same heat level they feel when they think of the Nanking Massacre. You're welcome.

>>12444222
recipe?

>>12438312
>>12440989
>>12443153
*diu nay lo mo
is the correct pronunciation even if many cantos say it the other way.

>>12443159
That never happened. Stop listening to your media propaganda. I was born in China and have literally never heard of such a thing except in Western media. It's all lies to make you feel superior.

>>12441202
I concur, but /ck/ be warned: never eat this and at any point afterwards trust a fart.

>>12446524
係「屌你老母」先係正確呀 智障死鬼佬

>>12438275

Say, "Herro? Dis China man food support? Give me the ol' spicy General with extra heat. I want my mouth to say TSOWIE ZOWIE after eating so don't skimp on the heat Mr. China man."

>>12438275
>General Tso's Chicken
literally what the F*CK is this

>>12443946
The boomer shit has been around for 2 years max retard

>>12438275
There's a Chinese takeout place near me and the only way I can get it spicy is to literally say extra, extra, extra, extra spicy.
They kind of get the point when I put 4 extras in there

>>12443218
This anon knows

>>12448268
Okay friend

>>12442729
>If your local Chinese resultant serves general tso's chicken/orange chicken or any of that other garbage it's not an actual Chinese restaurant,
No shit, you stupid faggot. Literally no one believes it's authentic Chinese food. I bet you tell people that there's no God or Santa Clause too.

>>12438275
Go to a Chinese restaurant that actually serves it spicy

>>12450557
You seem to be the racist, as is very common with your types. I simply don't give a shit about your fucking nations and don't want to visit them.
If you want to call me racist for disagreeing with you then you must have been shillary supporters since that's the best that they can do.
Are you still seething in your closets because Trump beat your annointed one?

>>12438275
Keep asking them to make it more spicy.
Every local Chinese or hurry house near where I've lived has got to know me within a few weeks because I keep going in asking for the same thing but asking for it hotter, and they remember and being like "hotter again?"... now I don't even need to say anything, they immediately know to make it volcanic.

>>12442402
>>12442417

You're both semi-correct. The actual beans come from the USA. They're shipped to bongland, where they're cooked and canned. In Wigan iirc, which is One of the worst places in the world.

>>12442729
I swear ive seen this posted before

I don't know what general tso chicken is, because I think it's only an American thing, and about as Chinese as I am, but it doesn't look like it's supposed to be spicy, looks like sweet & sour. So why not just order a chili dish?

>>12452309
What dish bro? Help us out

>>12452423

I've no idea what's on your local Chinese menu, but likely something like "twice-fried chili beef", anything with sichuan/szechuan in the name. Most takeaways are based on Cantonese food (loosely), which isn't typically very hot.

>>12452435
Any szechuan dish i've had here in the US is the same sugary syrupy shit like op's talking about.
It's bullshit.

>>12446528
cao ni ma ge bi

>>12452457

That's a shame man. There's a sichuan restaurant in my local Chinatown that makes a chicken dish that's so fucking hot it blows my mind. It's shocking how spicy that kitchen makes things. Those lemony peppercorns can make it extra insane.

Maybe try Chinatown, avoid shitty takeaway places is my advice.

>>12438402
>I'll have the Tianammen square special with the Winnie the Pooh huney glazed chicken

>>12452568
They will just give you minced meat.

You know they freeze this shit. Everyone gets the same.

>>12438275
they'll tell you, but only if you dress up as a cute anime girl, and go "tee-hee-hee!" when you order

>>12442324
It's fucking Gregg's you nonce.

What happened by the way?

>>12454059
>Greggs
I miss it, but I can't go back there. Not after I go called racist

>>12454059
is that bill burr?

>>12438275
nice chinise food

>>12442289
>bb-b-but it's whyte people who can't handle spice :(

>>12455355
>tfw ywn have your wee wee spanked by a librarian looking-ass chinkess deluxe

>>12455355
giwtwm

>>12438275
A lot of times, people at Chinese restaurants know exactly as much English as their work requires, which means all the customer service greetings/platitudes, names of dishes, numbers/sizes, and the most common of requests (like, if they hear, "chopsticks" in a sentence, they'll know what to do).

Long story short, buy a thing of cayenne and handle it yourself, cuz they probably don't know what the fuck you're asking for.

The secret is the adrenaline for the dog being butchered alive

>>12441348
I fucking hate dan dan noodles.

The sauce never mixes well with the noodles so you just get large clumps of the Chinese equivalent of rogue popcorn shell fragments that all get stuck in the gums around your teeth and never leave. I don't have problems with spicy stuff, or other dishes with seeds and shit in them. It's always just the dan dan noodles that fucking ruin my day.

After several years of trying different places' dan dan noodles, I'm sick of trying to like them. Fuck dan dan noodles.

>>12452471
What are you, two weeks into rosetta stone or some shit?

>>12456246
diu lay lo mo

>>12438275
>I'm getting sick of this non-spicy candy glazed chicken
based

>>12442289
>too much salt
>drowned in franks red hot

>>12438292
Everyone hates niggers...chinks really really really hate niggers

>>12458128
You mean "really really really really really"?

>>12458198
I think he meant "rearry rearry rearry"

>>12438275
Nowhere serves food spicy anymore because they go out of business of they do.
Wish I was making this up.

>>12455355
geoduck is quite delicious i can confirm

>>12438275
Do what I do and buy a bottle of hot chili sauce and just add it

>>12455355
The evolution of White man and Asian woman: In the beginning White man and Asian woman were united, physically, sexually, spiritually, as one. The original White man and Asian woman strolled in the Garden of Eden, naked and unashamed, and the world was once at peace, but then, Satan, in the form of Asian misogyny, separated Asian woman from White man and savagely robbed her of her precious White lover. And for nearly two thousand years Asian woman has been thusly deprived of the freedom to worship her White god; she was enslaved against her will, under the tyranny of Asian man’s dictatorship. Asian woman was mercilessly tortured, subjugated, and dominated; she was broken, torn to pieces and even killed for the sick amusement of the patriarchal Asian man who wanted nothing but to make Asian woman suffer for her “sin” of having once being loved by White man. And through her tears and in her dreams and in the slumber of two thousand years she cry for her White god to come to rescue for her.
Lo and behold, for the darkness is over and the light shall shine upon the world once again. White man has cleaved the air like thunder, like lightning and White man has proclaimed, the time is come! For he has come to rescue Asian woman from the Oriental torture chamber of hell, from Satan’s claws he shall steal her, and he will make the world aright and then White man and Asian woman shall be reunited as one once again, for White man and Asian woman so naturally belong to each other, as the original Adam and Eve, and the two-thousand-years dream will be awakened and its natural order restored when White man and Asian woman are reunited!

>>12438275
"Don't give me lo fan spicy" / "Don't give me guai lo spicy"

>>12440983
KEK