/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>12433228
CHADton brown

I hope your wife enjoyed those jizzpuppies

>>12433228
Nice blog post, faggot.

>>12433257
this. there's no way in hell people who do this don't have their food fucked with

you and your wife are petulant children, you reddit spacing faggot.

>>12433228
>I’m comin’ back there
You come back to the kitchen and you're literally going to die.

alton brown is based
https://cleanplatter.wordpress.com/2011/09/18/the-taste-of-disillusionment/

This is the most pathetic larping I have ever read.

>>12433228
They should have kicked you, your breeder wife and hellspawn to the curb. Sidenote: Stop taking your devil spawn to restaurants, no one wants to see it while they're trying to enjoying a meal. And no, when it starts wailing, throwing food, drooling, shitting and pissing in it's diapers, it is not cute.

>>12433401
Ragey wagie in kitchen cagie.

Yay!

>>12433401
I don’t think a child was mentioned anywhere in the OP.

Alton began the chat with a gift of books to the library, which we cheered wildly! The reason he’d been asked to come to Inside-Out was because many patrons of the Cedar Rapids library had checked out cookbooks – particularly his. So he began with a gift of a complete set of his cookbooks, which he pulled out of a box with appealing fake surprise. “Oh, what’s this? Another one?”

But when he was finished with his own books, I had sort of expected him to stop with the jokes and give some other books to the library – essential cookbooks that had guided him to the place of knowledge where he is now. But, nah – he gave the library The Story of Vinegar and White Trash Cooking – which, okay, looks pretty interesting. But he held up one of the books and said, “So, okay – this book’s from the South, where I’m from, and it’s got a few things in it that might be kind of foreign and exotic to you Iowans.” He turned the page. “Look! A real live Negro!”

>>12433429
>my baby wanted hush puppies
Maybe take a remedial reading course?

>>12433466
It's in the "hey baby how you doin?" context.

>>12433466
>A literal baby specifically asks for hush puppies

>>12433466
goo goo ga ga I want hush puppies goo goo

>>12433496
How else do you hush them up?

>>12433401
I really hope you're 16 or younger.

>>12433401
>>12433466
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>12433466
based and retardedpilled

>>12433228
>Juan step off the line for 10 minutes
>some autistic man wants something and thinks we have all the ingredients to make it based on the menu, get to it
>everyone else, cover for Juan, I know it sucks that it will screw everything up to create a new system just for one bloke
>servers, be warned your ticket times may increase, we had to take Juan off grill

>a seaside restaurant in NC that doesn't serve hushpuppies

>>12433393
Its what Alton Brown claims to have done.

>>12433657
Everyone makes mistakes.

>>12433711
Your mother.

>>12433389
>Look! A real, live negro!

go somewhere that serves hushpuppies you literal idiot

>>12433393
the angry replies from food service workers are even more pathetic, and they're REAL

>>12433228
This guy is such a massive fag. He talks tough and likes to pretend he's manly by riding motorcycles and owning guns, but if a real alpha challenged him he'd cower in the corner and piss his diapers in submission. He only got famous because there was a hole in the food TV show market with all the good PBS ones ending. He'd have never made it in the world of food in the 80s.

95% of the time this would backfire and they'll just say no again and you'll leave angry. Even if a restaurant 'has the ingredients on hand' to make a certain recipe, theres plenty of other factors. Do the chefs know how to make it right? Whats the food cost so they know how much to charge you?

>>12433466
>>12433496
>>12433585
worth coming into the thread just for this, 10/10 keep up the good work fags

>>12433466
kek

Sounds like something he would do. I remember the feasting on asphalt episode where he went to a place and demanded the black waitress make him chicken on waffles and she didn't know how and thought he was crazy but threw it together anyway like she was his slave.

>>12433228

>I knew Alton was a Republican
Holy based Alton. I take back every mean thing I've said about him on this board.

>le customer is always right
nah

>>12433625
As someone from and in NC, this right here. Alton needs to fuck off back to Atlanta.

>>12433466
awwww shid, anon. pls no

>>12433228
>Me and my mammoth sized wench want some literal deep fried batter to gorge our huge heaving bodies on, please accommodate us before we start sweating uncontrollably and die in your restaurant from a stress induced heart attack at the mere concept of not getting fried fat served to us

>>12433389
wtf I hate Alton Brown now

>>12433871
Why are you so angry?

>>12433228
To be fair, what kind of faggot fish place doesn't offer hushpuppies? I'd be pissed too.

>>12433532
>feeding your baby hushpuppies instead of hushbabies
I'm sorry you grew up eating dog food, but not all of us live like animals

>>12433619
>thinks we have all the ingredients to make it based on the menu, get to it
They probably did
Hush Puppies are super easy

>>12433466
best post all day

>>12433466
This is bait, right?"

I went to a taco place very close to closing asked for 4 tacos of tongue when the order was complete, now closing time i changed my mind and told her she didn't hear me right I want 10. She went back to get her dad, the owner. And asked me if I wanted to 10 I said yes. And he gave the dirtiest fucking look I've ever seen any greasy spic give me. Some unsuspecting guy walked in and asked for soup and if it was closing but owner insisted that he place his order. We both got out foods and left. Needless to say i don't go back cause the owner was an asshole.

>>12433228
>You should be able to order off the menu
>forces off-menu order

>>12434529
Because I didn't get the job at a place I put 4 years of volunteer work at and lost $150 yesterday on a camera and spiders are coming into my bedroom.

>>12434882
Came here to post this

>>12433228
Based Boomer

>>12434828
You're a faggot

Restaurants aren’t churches. Uh When you uh go into a uh restaurant, you, uh, the consumer, uh are in charge. You should be able to uh order off the menu. You should uh be able to order anything off the menu.

Me and my uh wife were in North Carolina, at a seaside restaurant uh that had recently revamped its menu such that it no longer included uh hush puppies, and my baby wanted hush puppies, uh so I ordered some.

“I’m sorry, sir; those aren’t on the menu,” said the server.

”They are so on the menu,” I said. “uh Your catfish, here uh, is rolled in cornmeal. Your fried chicken uh is soaked in buttermilk. Your french fries are uh made in a deep-fat fryer. Combine the cornmeal and the buttermilk, make them in to balls, uh fry them, and serve them to my uh wife.”

“I’ll have to go speak to the manager,” said the waiter.

I didn’t get what I wanted uh until I scrawled “I’m comin’ back there!” on a coaster uh and had it delivered to the cook. Everyone should uh try this.

>>12433300
I used to cook for a living when i was 19 and one time after a 16 hour shift a bunch of chad oil faggots came in 5 minutes before closing and demanded steaks and shit even after the waitress told them appies only.

I spat in their food and im still ashamed 10 years later, but yeah the point is dont fuck with people cooking your food because I'm a normie and i still did it

>>12433466
I don't get it

>>12433228
>people who consume bodily fluids

>>12434405
This is one of the most misinterpreted phrases out there and it’s typically entitled retards who seem to think is some sort of written law and not a business philosophy

>>12435286
unfortunately it's more than that when they can call and complain to credit card companies

>>12433228
Yeah.. they likely did disgusting things to those hush puppies. Your poor wife.

>>12433466
You are an absolute retard

>>12434943
LOL, suck shit.

But you should be happy about the spiders. They're true bros.

>>12433228
>be me
>at work dinner
>order a well-done steak
>a colleague says to me that the chef doesn't like it when people order steak well done
>That's alright, the chef's not the one who will be eating the steak
>he glares at me

it's so easy to push normies buttons

>>12433389
I'm really annoyed that Alton is proud that the only reason he got away with it was because he was a celebrity on the Food Network. Assuming this is true anyway.

Who is the OP blogger and why is he credible?

>>12435601
The blogger is the one who suggests that's why he got away with it. Alton was apparently convinced anybody would be treated the same way.

>>12433228

this never happened. you never said any of that.

>>12435687
Read the thread. Alton Brown said it.

>>12433228
This guy is a dickhead who makes recipes with shit no one has in their kitchen.

>>12433228

>>12433228
He's not wrong.

>>12433466
Congrats, moron.

>>12433368

not die but probably do a fuckton of Meth
kitchen workers are high school drop outs who do Meth
why else would a person in their 30's or 40's work as kitchen help?
they should call restaurant kitchens "Meth
Town"

>retard constructs elaborate fantasy to inflate his self-esteem

>>12435700
I remember it took me 5 hours of running around town to find cake flour. Apparently for Alton regular wasn't good enough.

>>12433466
Capped

>>12438385
Should have spent those 5 hours typing cake flour substitute into google noob.

>>12438385
regular and cake flour are nothing alike, don't be a pleb

>>12433393
Not as bad as you larping that you don't have a joke of a life.