/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>11919926
So you’re an incel?

>>11919944
>that retarded boomer who thinks he’s going to score with the waitress

>>11919950
But I have several times. Maybe you should up your game?

>>11919926
If the waiter/waitress keeps coming to my table and asking if everything's fine.
I want to eat in peace, not having someone interrupt me and trying to make me feel like royalty by being my 'servant'

>waiter fills up your drink even though it's 90% filled

>>11919944
>incel
>involuntary celibate
>would hate a woman's touch
An incel would blow his load on the spot.

>>11919926
Some 16-17 y/o high schooler called me dear at a grocery store, I'm 23. Shit was weird. I don't give a fuck if that makes me autistic, don't call anyone dear unless you're at least 50+ years older.

>>11920149
she wanted to fuck

>>11920163
>she

>>11920101
A lot of places this is a case of management not the individual waiters. I used to work in a place where we were required to ask if the food was okay after 3 minutes of serving.

>>11919953
Sorry, it doesn't count when you and he are gay, anon.

>>11920181
okay. Good to know

waiters want to make sure you're ok because when its busy everyone wants something from you all at the same time. Fair enough some will patronize you but thats what most people want. For the majority of patrons that tip, they want that attention. Now fuck off

>>11920210
>most people want to be asked if everything's is good
really now?

>>11919926
>eating delicious meal
>see a nigger enter restaurant

>>11920141
Nope. Involuntary celebrate is just a code word for a guy who hates women. In their feeble little brains they’ve convinced themselves that women reject them while it’s really the uncles that drive women away with their hatred.

>>11920188
Wow did your mom help you write that joke anon?

>>11920228
No, your mom did while I was having sex with her last night. She's also fat.

>>11920245
So you’re into fat chicks huh?

>>11920245
not that guy, but I got to interrupt here
she got inspiration for the joke by looking at your penis probably

>>11920248
>chick

a mom can't be a chick

>>11920180
Boipussy is superior anyway.

>enter a restaurant
>people exist
>not abandoned

>>11920424
no

I guess going out to dinner as an incel ruins your meal in general

>>11919926
I had a waiter who was maybe 2 years older than me add the word "sport", "champ", "boss", and some other names to the ends of the sentences. I didn't tip him and ignored him, until I had to order. After I was finished eating he hit me with "Can I take your plate sport, you did a good job eating everything".

>female waitress calls me 'sweety'
>wait for nine hours in the car park for her to finish her shift
>she says she was just being polite and doesn't want to marry me
>police come to my house that night with a restraining order
make up your mind bitch because i'm getting mixed messages

>>11919950
l have actually fucked several just from meeting them at the end of their shift.
women are whores, you're a fucking idiot for calling everyone boomer, btw. no one said baby boomer since the fucking 90s because that was a term used to describe a market demographic.
you are a dumb bitch.

>>11919926
>But when your waitress touches your dick
100% "Tip"

>>11920228
no, my dad

>>11922913
>t.pangry boomer

>>11920181
>after 3 minutes of serving
that seems about right.
everyone has tried the food, can tell you if any complaints and not too far in when they forgot to ask for extra whatever it is they need to make the meal perfect
>>11920221
disgusting

>>11922913
>i wave a crisp hundred dollar bill under the nose of a waitress and she fucks me for it
>my masculinity was reaffirmed, ok? I mean, I grabbed some pussy, right? Just grabbed it with my bills, ok?

>>11922882
lmfao you got rocked faggot. by some lowy waiter no less

>>11919926
>>calls you sweetie, or dear
clearly you don't live in the south.
Go to a local diner and I guarantee you'll have an older lady call you "sweetie", "dear" or "sugar."

Older black ladies more frequently use "sugar" than others.

>>11923008
This black ~19 year old girl called me "honey" at a Waffle House in Atlanta. I'd be lying if I said I didn't like it.

>>11922999

Damn, the projecting is so hard it could lighten the entire Pacific ocean.
He said nothing about paying them. I think what he meant was that they are just as horny as men.
Now wether to believe his story is an other matter...

>>11922913
>that boomer who somehow browses 4chan, yet is oblivious to memes

>>11920223
Then if they hate women and want nothing to do with them, then they're voluntary celibates (or simply, celibates).

>>11920181
I used to purposefully never tip at those places and make a point of telling the staff that it was the reason why I didn't tip.
The look on their faces was always pretty funny.
If I want the waiter I'll call for you. If the foods bad I'll fucking tell you. If the foods great I'll fucking tell you.

>>11920424
poo in (urethral) tube
>>11920223
Is that what the Vice article told you?

>>11919926
thats literally a sign of being autistic OP.

>>11922913
Based boomer

>>11919926
puts mayo on my plate

>>11923073
No, their celibacy is involuntary but they play mental games to convince themselves post facto that their celibacy is due to virtue. A [voluntary] celibate chose to be celibate from the start because it fits into his or her values. A person who would like to have sex and has never done so, but does not blame others for his problem, is known as a virgin.

>>11919926
When the waiter seats me near some loud fucks that stay around for the entire duration of my meal.

11923961
Like how you've done this in order to convince yourself that your misunderstanding of a term was/is actually purposeful and deliberate.

>>11920121
I tip extra for this service.
But then again I chug water like a mofo.

>>11919926
>at restaurant
>waitress touches your shoulder
>calls you sweetie, or dear
100% tip if you know what I mean.

>>11924363
Based.

This is literally the only time I make an effort to give a good tip above the minimum.

>>11919926
>waitress speaks to me

I just get up and leave whenever this happens.

>>11920181
yeah I used to work at a place that told me I had to murder jews but I don't do everything people tell me.

>hands you drink

>>11919944
there was some bullshit study done like 20 years ago that showed people tipped more their waitress touched them. this made it into waitress folklore and got passed down through the generations.

>>11919926
>go to america
>pay for my dinner
>expected to pay waiters sallary
Tipping is the stupidest shit I've ever experienced, why are the people who come to eat meals expected to PAY your fucking staffs wages, stupidest shit ever.

>>11924471
If you served a drink like that in korea, the customer would slap your face.

>>11924479
what if I told you that no one can make you do anything you don't want to.

>ask for half a glass of something
>They give me a full glass
This angers me more than anything. That or
>Order some super common thing (chicken burrito)
>Somehow it's missing a major ingredient (chicken)
>Ask for it and add it in myself so they don't throw out the burrito and make a new one
I don't want to waste it and I'll add it in myself but how do you fuck this up

>>11925131
You're autistic and obnoxious. You don't know better than anyone else. Fuck off.

>>11925135
I don't like complaining when mistakes happen but if I ask for half a glass I mean half a glass
If I order a normal chicken burrito, I expect a burrito with chicken in it.

It's very basic stuff and even then I don't bitch about it often.

>waiting 10 minutes for the check
>waiting to be seated
>needed reservations
>waiting 30 minutes between courses
>each course is a single bite
>$30 spaghetti and meatballs
>$30 dollar cheeseburger
>brioche bun
>gruyere
>"Our special today is a mix of all the things in the fridge that we really need to use up."

I like places where I pay first, grab the food, take it out if I want, and not have to pay salaries for people to carry food and dirty dishes.

>>11925142

Who order half a glass of something?

>>11925142
You expecting a chicken burrito with chicken is perfectly reasonable.

You expecting them to just give you some chicken instead of remaking your burrito entirely suggests that you're very out of touch with the real world.

>>11925142
Why the fuck would you order half a glass of anything? If you want half a glass of water, order a glass of water and drink half of it.

What happens if you finish the first half-glass and want another? Would you order a second half a glass of water?

If you're going to tell me that you would only order half a glass of a drink when you know that's the amount you want to drink, no more no less, I am going to tell you to fuck off again.

>>11925163
>>11925170
>>11925180
I should have mentioned the half a glass was related to refills.

>>11919926
>be me
>sitting alone at ihop
>enjoying biscuits and gravy
>not as good as giant chef's burgers
>waiter comes by
>big fat guy
>"Here's your check sir. Pleeease come see me anytime."
>weird but ok
>look at check
>it has his number on it in the middle of a heart
>dats gay nigga
>pay bill and try to leave
>waiter is winking at me
>hostess comes up to me
>she looks terrified
>"take me with you"
>"have a good one"
>I bounce like I never bounced before
I'm tired of all the gay fuckers in the restaurant business. I would like to go to a ihop/unos/or whataburger without getting hit on by guys

>>11923961
>celibate from the start
damn those kids and their dry dick ways

>implies to be hetero
>goes to a pancake restaurant

pick one

>>11924488
Anon, he isn't American, he probably doesn't know what Freedom is. Be nice

>>11924387
i’d give her more than the tip

>>11925643
>why won't all these faggots stop sucking my dick?

>>11926115
what do you mean?

>>11926164
He would shaft her along as well

>>11925214
That does not make it better.

>>11925643
This definitely happened.

Getting called "dear, hun, or sweetie" is only acceptable if it's
1. a female waitress
2. much older than you
3. prime-Americana greasy spoon diner
Then it just makes the experience more authentic.

>>11923402
and how is the waiter supposed to know you'd tell them?
better for them to ask once and leave you alone.

>>11924462
Are they hiring?

>enjoying my meal
>chewing a mouth full of food
>waiter pops up out of nowhere
>"is everything all right tonight?"
>maintains eye contact with me while I try to finish chewing so I can answer

>go to restaurant
>get female waiter
>she ignores you for your entire meal even though you're her only table
YOBANNOE DNO ZAEBIS

>>11926358
>3. prime-Americana greasy spoon diner

Not a real thing anymore bud, sorry.

Stand offish attitudes from wait staff
>order chicken crispers at chilis
>they're soggy and weren't fried at high enough temp
>ask for new batch cause theyre soggy
>"Im sure they tasted fine."
Thats no the point you cunt. Im paying for crispers not soggers. Its not even your fault so why stand off.

comped

>>11920101
Don't eat somewhere with table service.

>>11923402
please stop going out in public you complete fucking sperg

>>11926730
Just start talking and spew your food everywhere. Pretty sure they won't do it again.

>dad makes drunken rant while weeping in the middle of a restaurant
every time i lose my appetite

>>11919926
What kind of antisocial sperg would be offended by a woman treating them kindly while serving them their meal?

>>11923008
>>11923023
Wholesome southposting

>>11920181
This is the number one thing that blows cock about anywhere with waiters. Fuck this shit. I especially hate it when I and my table partner are CLEARLY deep in a serious conversation and those fucking turds still come up to the table with their fake ass "please tip me a lot" smiles and ask me if everything is okay. Everything WAS okay, cunt.

>>11927457
>Schizo mom talks shit about the waitress for being a cunt (most of the time nobody even knows what she's talking about) openly with the waitress being in hearing distance
Thanks mom, we all love our backwash drinks and our fries salted with boogers.

>>11923023
If ANY 19 year old girl called me "honey" I would fucking faint

>>11922882
get owned bitch

>>11922913
>unironically larping about having sex on a japanese anime based image board

Anon, I....

>>11920223
go away you fat bitch.

>>11927495
>ask if everything is okay
>this shit happens
>don't ask if everything is okay
>get docked for being inattentive

t. Olive Garden server

>>11923402
How much of the cook's saliva do you have in your mouth, you fucking cunt? It's probably more than any female kissing you.

>>11923008
Don't forget being told "have a blessed day"

>>11927582
c'mon man it's not rocket surgery. all anyone wants is their drink kept full

>>11919944
is it funny or heroic to parrot what ever the msm says? Is it good to be an a NPC, anon?

>>11922882
Jesus how fucking short are you

>>11919926
There's a tiny vegetarian indian place near me that does amazing palak paneer, it has an open kitchen you can see into, and the guy who runs it pretends he isn't the only person working there. He has to go through a separated bit when he leaves the kitchen to get to the dining room to take orders and he puts on a wig and a shawl there, i know for certain because i've walked past them hanging on a hook to go to the bathroom.
I've been there atleast a dozen times and I've only once seen other customers, indians, who gave me a look like 'get out while you can'.
and he uses this weird voice but he says hello from the kitchen when i come in and sounds normal

It's honestly all quite scary but the food is so good and cheap as well.

>waitress brings out food
>my order is correct, but my wife's isn't
>don't realize this until the waitress is gone
>wife asks ME to let the waitress know
bitch, it's YOUR order
>do it anyway because I'm pussy whipped

>>11919926
>>waitress touches your shoulder
>>calls you sweetie, or dear
35% tip

>>11919926
>>at restaurant
>>waitress touches your shoulder
>>calls you sweetie, or dear
cum and fart at the same time

>>11920223
Why won't their uncles leave them alone?

>>11919926
>place order
>waiter disappears for 10 minutes
>comes back and puts food on table
>smells like they just dumped an ashtray out on the table while they were at it.
If I ran a restaurant, I'd have a strict no-smoking policy for the wait staff. Unless it was one of the few states that still allow smoking indoors, in which case they'd be limited to that section.

I'm a firm believe that you should be able to do whatever you want as long as it doesn't affect anyone else. To each their own. But walking around a food service area smelling like an ashtray DOES affect other people.

>>11923614
No, autism would be more like their brain seizes up when touched. It's like audible static, except in your head. It keeps you from focusing, thinking, and especially speaking clearly (because speaking is linked to the first 2). It is a persistent discomfort that won't fade until the person leaves your line of sight. Your brain basically shuts down. It's insanely stressful in a way a normal person couldn't fathom. That's why it's literally diagnosed as a neurological disorder and not just social awkwardness. Your brain itself is missing a few offramps.

That is what an autist would feel in that situation. They'd also be more likely to leave a large tip. Autistic people are very good tippers because they really really want other people to like them, and they don't want to be bothersome.

t. autist before it became trendy. diagnosed at 12 years old in 1994.

>>11929685
fucking beta
quit subsidizing these whores and their choices

>>11926730
you shouldn't stuff your mouth full publicly

>>11925643
>Gay
>Fat
It’s an SJW who posts about how the trump administration is just like harry potter.
Men like physical things more so gays range from twinks to hunks.
Women are more into the emotional aspects of people and that’s why lesbians are mostly obese

>eating out with group of friends
>everyone gets their food except one friend
>havent seen waiter again, flag her down like 15 minutes later
>"hey, wheres my friends food at?"
>"oh hold on"
>she brings him his food thats just probably been done and sitting there for 15 fucking minutes
all six of us left no tip, fuck em. Food wasnt even that good.

>>11919926
Was this in the South? Some rural areas do the same thing...I like being called sweetie or honey...they don't mean anything by it...just bein' friendly....

>>11919944
>doesn't know the incel would treasure that moment and think the waitress likes him
this is what happens when you say things other people tell you to say

>>11922913
This is you. This is literally fucking you.

>>11922882
Fricken owned

>at restaurant
>waitress drops the silverware and goes under the table to get it
>undoes your pants and gives you a dry handy
Immediate 0% tip and a guaranteed complaint to the manager and 1 star yelp review.

>>11922913
lol mad as fuck boomer

>>11922882
same thing happens to me all the time since I'm a manlet
saves me the trouble of tipping honestly

this happened to me, and i tipped like $1. went back next week, and she did it again. she even said "h-heh, see i remembered you..." just stopped going there.