/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Red, yellow, orange and green bell peppers are all the same thing at differing stages of ripeness.

Button mushrooms are baby portobellos.

You can consume venom and be fine.
The difference between poison and venom is that venom must be injected into the bloodstream while poison must be ingested.

>>11834868

Fun fact: I'm a delivery driver and if you don't tip me AT LEAST $4 I write your address in my little black leatherbound book and fuck with your pizza for the rest of eternity. The things I have done to people's food....oh man. This one guy makes a habit of tipping me 75 cents EVERY TIME so I licked all the cheese on his pizza last time.

>>11834882

what a fuckin loser lmao. Rest of eternity huh? If you are over the age of 25 and take pride in the fact you deliver pizzas you're a fuckin cuck

>>11834882
Fun fact: I often answer the door totally naked and sporting a massive boner whenever I order a pizza. The exposure gets me off and the pizza guys/girls engage in sexual activity with me far more often than one would ever expect.

>>11834882
BASED

>>11834895
CRINGE

>>11834895

Loser huh? I do really well in fact. $9 base pay hourly and then tips so I often pull about $90-100 on a good night but I have made as much as $150 if people like you are not entitled BRATS and don't tip or barely tip. I Make about $25,000/year. I have my own a car, a truck, ATV, sony PS4, have a mortgage on a house that I own, and get free pizza and chicken wings whenever I want. Literally living the American Dream and the fact that I am only 31 and have all this going for me is a testament to the greatness of our nation. What the fuck do you do with your life instead of mocking other people's livelihoods on 4chan, god damned loser?

We share about 60% of our DNA with bananas.

Eating bananas is cannibalism, you fucking monster.

>>11834906

>tfw I make $220/hour.
>tfw people like this who settle for mediocrity and are proud of it acrually exist.

Fucking depressing. If you had some self respect you would not fuck with people's food. If you had any humility you could say you just do your job to pay the bills. No one aspires to deliver pizza for a living and you know that. 31 isn't too late to get your act together.

>>11834868
If you leave limes to ripen in a paper bag on your counter they will become lemons

>>11834906
>have a mortgage
>on a house I own
If you have a mortgage you don't own the house you fucking simpleton.

>>11834945

Yes I do the house is on my name and I could sell it if I want therefore it's my house

>>11834943

I don't know why but I laughed my fucking ass off

>>11834902

How is fucking with someone's food based? What if it's a family night and they order pizza and tip $2 or $3 because that's all the change they have? That's fucked dude.

>>11834882
lol I've never tipped more than 3 dollars in my life
In fact, I consider 3 dollars to be a higher end tip

>>11834983
>Flyovers actually tip less than 25%
Oh wow... Just wow......

>>11834956
you have equity in a house, not own a house.

>>11835009
I live in wyoming and a $3 tip is enough to cover my entire month's rent

If you close up the seed pod from snow peas, it will regenerate more peas. Big Pea doesn't want you to know this so that you'll just keep buying more peas.

Jolly "Green" Giant - "green" like "money"? Get it? Don't fall for it.

>>11835036

Whoa mind fuck. Does this work for lemon if I crazy glue the copped lemon halves back together and give it water?

>>11834868
Reheating walnuts activates a toxin thats lethal in large doses. The toxin was used to shine shoes up until the 90s when people stopped wearing leather shoes every day. Its still used to buff out scratches in wood

Lemons are not a natural occurrence. They're man-made, like broccoli.

Life didn't give us lemons. We made them up.

>>11834871
I remember the day I found this out. It still blows my mind because each color tastes different and goes with different dishes.

>>11834906
You have a terrible job and are terrible at it, you fuck with people's food like a fucking teenager yet you're 31.
He isn't the loser sunshine.

>>11834882
Make sure to get AIDS and do that. It'll be much more enjoyable.

>>11835141

Fuck you faggotttttt!!

>>11835046
I know that it seems like that should work, and there's plenty of science to suggest it would, but it won't. Crazy glue contains enzymes that effectively sterilize the reproductive organs of lemons, and many other citrus fruits too. It does work for kumquats.

Fun fact: Kumquats contain very little (less than 10%) cum.

>>11834906
Loser because you do disgusting things to other people's food just because they don't give you paper. You make more than minimum along with tips from other people. I worked in food service for over a decade, living off if tips, and never fucked with food. Fuck you.

>>11835035
Thought all you wyoming fags froze to death

>>11834956
and there it is......the stupidest fucking thing I’ve read today
now we all know why you work delivering pizzas
>thinks $25k/year isn’t poverty

Cheese can prevent cavities.

>>11835374

You're just an ignorant stuck up yuppie faggot in the big city. I'm going to spit in every pizza I deliver in this county tonight because of you stupid idiot!!

On Rhode Island pizza comes in a plastic bag. This is because it is a misdemeanor to transport trash illegally, but the definition of trash has been applied to conventional pizza boxes enough to set precedent (DOUGLAS V. WAKEFIELD, CASE 41-2018-01729) that any car with 5 or more pizza boxes would be on the recieving end of a painful $400 fine

>>11835448

wtf are you on about?

>>11835179
Mature response, particularly good use of the letter T.

>>11835929
>>>11835179
>Mature response, particularly good use of the letter T.

Meh. Could have used more exclamation points. That really demonstrates mastery of the written word.

>>11834871
There's no fuckin way this is real

>>11834906
You're a hardcore loser if you fuck with people's food. You're saying you're happy with engaging in nigger-tier behavior.

>>11835035
You're lying. I live in wyoming and I've never seen you before in my life.

>>11836244
http://thescienceexplorer.com/nature/do-you-know-real-difference-between-red-and-green-peppers
It's real.

>>11835137
I think I have a bad pallet because they all taste the same to me :/

>>11834922
based
also what is your job? lawyer, Doc?
450k a year is very very good beyond top 1%

>>11836377
No, I mean it's unrealistic than anybody could think other people don't know that.

>>11834906
That was a good thread mate, I still make more than him at a much younger age :)

>>11834906
>What the fuck do you do with your life instead of mocking other people's livelihoods on 4chan, god damned loser?
4 times as much as you, apparently

>>11834922
t. business owner

>>11834922
>trillionaire says 31 isn't too late
As a 23 year old, I needed to hear that.

>>11834871
What about blue?

>>11835179
Excellent bait man. But this made it too obvious

>>11834906
>$9/hr

>>11837358
Addendum
>pizza boy
>31 yo
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

>>11836244
Same with chiles. Red and green are the same, just different stages of ripeness, yet completely different taste.

>>11836382
I'm sorry for your malfunctioned buds, anon. =,,(

>>11836554

Cheers, yeah I'm a cardiologist.

>>11834882
>I'm an extortionist, and if you do give me money for bringing you pizza; I'll rub my dick on the next one.
Costco or take out. Fuck assholes like these.

>>11834906
>Brags about having a fucking PS4

>>11838835

I bet you play original xbox loser ass poorfag

>>11834906
>i fuck with your food if you don't tip me well!
Uh-huh, so do you tell them this? Otherwise, how would they know and how would they change? How do you even have a job?

>>11839453
Kek

>>11839188
they're not even 300 bucks, why would you brag about that in the same sentence as a car and a house lmao

>>11834906
I get paid 13.50/hour and all I do is sit around playing vidya or watching movies and take a little walk every hour or so.

>>11835394
wait what?

>>11835186
>Fun fact: Kumquats contain very little (less than 10%) cum.
Isn't this false advertising?

>>11839565
It's all part of the food-naming scam perpetrated by the Bilderburgers. Take Polish sausages, for example. I tried to shine my shoes with one, and they just ended up a sticky mess, and dogs chased me wherever I went. My neighbor grows Brussels sprouts, but she's not even Dutch. Rack of lamb? Does NOT come from lamb boobs, I learned. It's a ripoff, man.

>>11839575
>rack of lamb does NOT come from Lamb boobs

And they say this industry isn't corrupt.

>>11834882
Jesus christ
The bait on this board is so lazy and uninspired

I smell of cum : 3

fun fact
if you read this you're gay

>>11839591

Stop cheating on your husband my dick can only get so hard!

>>11839599
>: 3 what do you mean anon?

>>11839591
OwO wanna rp >;3

>>11836566
Uuh, i juzz pretend to be retardred

>>11839645

Nothing I just like infidelity

>>11839645
jesus christ it's a lion
get in the car

>>11834868

what we call "limes" are just unripe lemons

>>11839598
dang, got me.

at least i didn't lose the game

>>11839662
0W0 yesy :3 *drinks your peepee juices*

>>11839742

>>11839575
>Brussels
>Dutch

>>11834906
Im 22 and make $25/hr
You may be a fag

>>11836824
My friend is 30, graduated with aero eng this december, and is now working as an engineer. Its not too late, its never too late

>>11834871
>green bell peppers us all $1 a piece
>orange and red usually 2$ a piece

So I'm paying a dollar more for the same fuckin plant???

>>11834882
I used to give $5 or more (20-30%) for anything over $15, but I'm dropping it to a flat $3 for all orders just because of your post.

>>11840127
They take longer to mature and have a shorter shelf life, resulting in a higher rotting and throw out rate for both stores and restaurants.
It's only natural that they'd cost more.

>>11840508
I'm no economics wiz, but shouldn't they cost LESS in order to sell faster? I mean, most other produce (and food in general) is marked down when it's nearing the end of its life in order to get them off the the shelves.

>>11840708
They are priced according to what it costs the store to carry them.
They have a higher risk of loss, and it's not like people are going to stop buying an entire vegetable just because it costs a little more.

The entire fruit industry works like this too.
Depending on where you are, you can tell what fruits are harder to get for the stores, and how much they expect to lose every month, by how expensive they are.

>>11840738
That makes sense. Thanks for explaining.

>>11840508
at the stores I go to they all cost the same to cost average the shit out, which fucking sucks when I just want some green peppers and have to pay red/yellow prices

>>11838396
>tfw my heart doc is a /ck/ shitposter

>>11841032

>heart doc

Put down the doriots anon san