/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>11750775
How do I get girlfriend

I teach her recipes and then after she’s learned them she cooks for me

My gf is pretty meh at cooking so usually I do it for both of us

>>11750775
I cook, but whenever I got a massive coiler that ruins the toilet (often) her hands are the small enough to fit down the tube and fish it out. We have a good system.

>>11750818
Is there anything she's not meh at

>>11750775
Imagine the huge vinegary greasy shit she's gonna do after eating that slop

>>11750775
It goes both ways

>>11750775
I don't have a GF. BUT if I did I'd probably still cook, I enjoy cooking for friends

>>11750822
Sex.
She below meh (starfish), bites during blowjobs, won't do anal.

>>11750775
I cook the meat she is in charge of everything else.

>>11750824
I-is that a sex thing anon? Because I'm worried you're making it a sex thing.

The great thing about my GF is that she doesn't need to way, as she is a hypothetical entity

>>11750828
Fucking hell dude.

>>11750828
Is she at least pretty to look at? Why do you keep her around?

>>11750775
I cook most of the time but she's quite good at it as well and will spell me off sometimes, or we'll cook together sometimes. Whoever doesn't cook does dishes/finishes cleaning the kitchen. It's a pretty good system.

>>11750833
I'm not making it a sex thing, but just imagine the smell. Maybe if you put your peen in her pooper you'd get shit up your urethra and you could piss the shit back out.

>>11750828
Yeah uh that’s gonna be a YIKES from me

>>11750839
>>11750846
This >>11750828 wasn't me!

>>11750847
Ever mount her from behind as she's doing the dishes?

>>11750855
No she's mostly just around for show. I suck cocks in secret on the weekends.

>>11750848
I think you're making this a sex thing, Anon. Why are you making this a sex thing?

>>11750860
Are you gay btw, if that matters?

>>11750855
Not usually while doing dishes but we've definitely been cooking together and had it turn into sex. Definitely at least once the food never got finished.

>>11750860
Manly cocks or femboi cocks?

>>11750865
It's not a sex thing but just imagine, as a joke if you fed her a few laxatives with her meal and then roofied her.
You could seal your mouth over her anus and just wait, as a joke.

>>11750874
I don't like this sex thing. I'm not imagining it.

>>11750883
What sex thing?
This is food and cooking.

>>11750824
>>11750833
>>11750848
>>11750865
>>11750874
>>11750883
>>11750885
reddit

I had had a girlfriend once. Gave me a bad case of the gays.

>>11750891
I too have the worst case of the gays, but I didn't need a girlfriend to get it.

>>11750887
Actually this is The Chan and an f you don't like it you can head back to ebaumsworld.

>>11750901
Jesus Christ I haven't heard of that abomination in a while.

>>11750909
I figured you and your bros would discuss it all the time over on Reddit

>>11750775
my gf is garbage at cooking. if anything gets made in the kitchen it's usually by me so she doesnt fuck it up.

>>11750936
Does she do anal?

>>11750775
They say food is the way to a man's heart but showing a woman you can cook is a surefire way to her pussy.

>>11750775
Kinda take turns. And by take turns I mean that neither of us end up actually cooking if it's just us and we make mac n cheese and chill.

>>11750775
My trans girlfriend loves to bake, loves decorating cupcakes, all that kind of lady-like thing. If it's meat that needs roasting then as the man of house it's usually up to me.

>>11750964
i am totes going to try out this new #lifehack the next time i buy teavana

>>11750968

im gay btw if that matters

>>11750775
She can't cook to safe her life or is too lazy to cook.
She's seemingly incapable of learning new recipes and has no interest in self development.
She also starts dieting/stops smoking about three times a month, but has no self discipline, so she asks me to buy cigarettes and candy (that she prefers over normal food) after one day. I often decline.

>>11750775
My g/f is great at cooking. Also great at sucking my cock as well. Will marry her this year.

>>11750968
Your “girlfriend“ is not a girl, and you are not a real man.

Fucking faggots everyone

>>11750775
we usually cook together. which ever one of us thinks up a dish to cook and finds the recipe is in charge while the other helps prep ingredients. only really cook for each other if one of us is sick or had a hard day i guess. feels good either way though

>>11750775
Ummm......Girlfriend....Yeah I cook for 'Her'......yeah.....

>>11751055
Terribly unbased and atrociously bluepilled.

>>11751079
why do people make these dumb posts as if having a girlfriend is something special....any fag can have a girlfriend

>>11751086
>fag
>girlfriend
Kek

I originally taught her to cook. But now since our lives are so busy with work and such we usually eat out. I love her biscuits and gravy tho

>>11751055
Fucking newfags taking easy bait. I bet you're circumcised as well

>>11750828
>won't do anal
based

>>11751086
You must be new here.

>>11750775
my what?

>gf

I cook for her. I incentivate her to try to cook something as it can be fun but she won't do it as she once fucked up a couple of dishes and refuses to cook since then

>>11750775
I'm the girlfriend and I usually bake for my girlfriend, and cooking we do together uwu

>>11750775

I cook nine outta ten meals. She's a good cook but not as good as me

>>11751135
To add to this, she has gained 28 pounds since we started dating about 2 and a half years ago. Shes 155 cm (5'1) tall and used to weight 108 pounds, now she's at 136 lbs, I don't consider her obese but she definitely has lost her tight body as now has a gut, it's a shame really.

What do bros? She refuses to diet, she can't/won't intermittent fast or keto or even restrict her calories

I've spent a few years in professional kitchens and I enjoy cooking, so I've generally got more gumption to get up and cook something. Sure, we'd both rather lay around and play video games or watch YouTube - but if I'm hungry I want a good hot meal.

That's not to say she can't cook. She can and would actually make a better cook than me if she spent any time in kitchens. She's got a hypersensitive nose and is really good at flavor combinations. I enjoy her cooking, but she doesn't cook as often as I do, for the both of us at least.

Lol at this larp of a thread

Where y'all think y’all are?

Ck is for fast food and Gordon Ramsey’s eggs and that chick with palsy who is really inspiring

>>11750828

>read this
>"damn man, haha what the fuck"
>alt-tab back to skyrim

>>11750775
I can’t wait to find a girlfriend who cooks for me.

>>11751142
>I don't consider her obese but she definitely has lost her tight body as now has a gut
>it's a shame really

>>11751142
Have you tried getting her into fitness? My wife eats like a horse but it stopped being a problem when we started going to the gym three times a week.

If she can't cook she better god-damn well do anal on a flying god-damn trapeze!

>>11750887
Shut up. you aren't a 4channeler if you don't make ebin virgin shitposts about your interracial anal scat porn fetish and jerk circlejerk about your based patrician tier sexual interests
>hehe anyone else wanna smell her feet
>haha here have a (you), you based and redpilled bastard

>>11751498
Not sure what you are trying to say but whatever.
>>11751510
I'll try, that's my last option but as far as I'm concerned diet is much more important than gym for losing weight, I don't want her to try going to the gym for a couple of months and give up forever just because she's not losing weight for eating too much

>>11750775
We cook together, it's more efficient that way. Normally, he handles the meat and I'll handle the vegetables/sides. Or, I'll do the cooking while he does the prep. Just depends what we're making.

>>11751689
He's basically saying: "Her knees are too sharp, would not date."

>>11750828
Why do man expect woman to like anal?

One question for you. Do you like to get anal?

i cook because women are useless.
>>11750775
>vapid whore
>double bags under eyes
>that shitty eyeliner wispy point
>mustache
>caterpillar eyebrows
>pancake makeup
>1000 cal meal
>side of ranch
>dogtags?
your dream woman i imagine OP? did you shop out the adams apple?

>>11751715
ur a ho
ur expected to take dick in any of your holes

>>11750818
this, my gf hates cooking but she will do it for me but when she's in a bad mood it's got to be me otherwise she'll probably end up mashing tuna into somewhere it doesn't belong and crying

>>11750775
she does

>>11751142
If you want out without telling her she's fat and hurting her feelings, you should send a picture of your dick to her best friend. Her friend might even like it then you can cheat.

>>11750775
Both. I cooked her homemade tomato sauce and alfredo sauce and she made me homemade cajun mac n cheese

>>11753147
I do like it when I'm cooking and she cuts and prepares the ingredients for me

>having a gf
you probably have friends too you normalfaggots

>>11753162
So Anon, how's that crippling loneliness coming along? Feel good yet?

Both, but I'm the better cook and I enjoy it so I cook more often.

>>11750775
Both, but she's gluten avoidant / vegan and there's not much I make that she can appreciate.

My husband and I cook together, it's one of my favorite parts of the day since we always try new things and we're pretty fucking good at it honestly.

we both like receiving anal if that helps

>>11750775
Women are a meme.

>>11751142
Let her catch you jerking off to old pictures of her, extra effective if you stop actually having sex with her fat ass.

>>11750775
god damn that water looks delicious. i need to go get some

>>11750775
My first gf was shit at cooking, the food wasn't that bad it's just that she hated doing it, she'd always get moody and pissy afterwards. It was a big part of why I learned how to cook, so that she doesn't have to, cause the shitty attitude ruined any meal she made.

Since then I've been learning, I don't have a gf now but whenever I've dated one other girl for a few months and she loved it. It's a good skill to have, I also got into plating and shit to impress girls, it works.

My sister handles the cooking these days because she comes home from her classes earlier than I do from work. That and she doesn't want me to worry too much after coming back home which I appreciate, but I actually really enjoy cooking.
But the weekends are my turn, so I at least get a chance to.

>>11753661
But does she do anal?

>>11750775
I cook for myself
I throw shit in the pan and toss it around and call it food
walla

>>11753621
This but unironically
I love water

>>11750775
Anyone have sauce for this image. I'm specifically interested in the tee shirt and the chain on the bag. Thanx.

She's alright at cooking but not great. Usually she mostly helps with prep work and does the dishes and I'll do most of the cooking.

>>11750775

Being attracted to chicks is literally cringe. Considering women are attracted to men, that is disgusting. Intercourse with a woman is arguably one of the gayest things a man could do. Basically the same as doing a guy.

>>11753886
Off-topic /alc/ post reported.

>>11753661
>My sister
yall fuck tho?

>>11750775
I don't have the Bladerunner webm, but this would be the right moment to use it.

>>11750775
i'm still searching for sauce with very little luck.

if anyone has it then i'd be grateful if you shared.

>>11751490
haha

>>11750818
Same here senpai, I do all the cooking. Now that we have a kid I cook for 3. Atleast i dont have to do wash or dishes

>>11751138
nigga that some gay shit
continue

>>11755385

heh....

>>11750821
Oh Anon, thats romantic.

>>11750775
we take turns. I'd say we're equally average to below.

>>11753090
What terrible, completely misguided advice

>>11753425
Does she have a big nose, or he have a tiny nose.? I've been staring too long to tell anymore please help.

>>11753906
haha nice dude
great post!

>>11750775
what the fuck is the point of women if they can't cook

>>11756196
I'm gay, btw. Not sure if that matters.

I'm gay btw not sure if that matters.

She lets me suck her pusy and sniff her brapper and in return I cook and clean for her after work.

>>11751715
I love getting fucked in the butt. Too bad I don't like women.

I haven't dated in 5 years and eat mostly frozen, canned or shelf stable foods

Sometimes I get froggy and cook, like prime rib and what not if I want to treat myself

>>11750775
50/50 whoever's in the mood for cooking

She cooks for me, she does a lot of things for me. When she shower together she even washes me.

I wanted to eat nice things but not pay out the ass and have to go out all the time so I learned to cook and make lattes and stuff like that but I became too powerful and now I handle all the food for both of us.

>>11750775
Who?

Yes she cooks always because she's 25 years older than me :3

>>11750818
>>11750824
>>11750828
>>11750833
>>11750848
fucking cringe

Both. She is really good at asian dishes but other than that I am the head honcho in the kitchen.

None of my previous gf's knew how to cook or even really tried and I gotta say I don't know what I was missing. Never date a girl who doesn't cook, it's a read flag for a lot of other character flaws

>>11750775
She's not going to eat all of that. She's not even going to touch that burger.

>>11756740
That literally and unironically looks like a doll.
Am I the only guy who's so sick of girls who look like that pimples are starting to look attractive? At least then you know what you're getting.

If we are trying out a new recipe, I'll cook because she always fucks new shit up. If it's something she has made many times, and I know she has made it well in the past, I'll let her cook. Sometimes I just wish I had a nice latina gf who is competent in the kitchen.

>>11756765
>Am I the only guy
>literally and unironically
A talking tumor

>>11750775
I cook for her sometimes since she's awful at it. I don't trust her to make much more than a sandwich.

>>11756765
I know that feel.

>>11756765
That's fair. Not a fan of her face but Dat body.
My GF never wears makeup and I actually love it

>>11755897
Post feet

>>11756740
>>11756765

Does she do anal?

>>11750775
she can't handle a pan at all and can only put things in the oven or microwave. best thing she can do is cheesy potato wedges whereas i'm usually making burgers on the pan for the two of us or steak

>>11756825
Bro can I wear makeup? I'm a straight guy if that matters. Got any recs for light makeup?

>>11756825
>My GF
Yeah, but xe's a guy.

>>11750775
>Implying

>>11750775
When I had gf, we were both fairly good in the kitchen. She was better at cooking and I was better at baking, so that worked out.

I cook. She set my kitchen on fire once when she trued to be nice and make breakfast. This is why I cook

>>11750775
I'm single but I was the one who cooked when I was with my ex. I like cooking and she did most of the cleaning and laundry so it was mostly win-win for me.

>>11753084
>sliced cheese on baker
your entire life is a joke

>gf

She doesn't really know how to pick recipes, and once she picks one, she doesn't follow it the first time she cooks.

So it's mostly me.

>>11751111
anon im sorry no one has checked your fucking quads, impressive to say the least.

>>11750775
My what?

My girlfriend can't cook shit if it doesn't come from a box/bag

>>11757573
8 > 1

>>11753813
this! (still)

>>11758888
Nice

>>11756765
I find girls with pimples sorta cute
...pls no bully

It used to annoy the shit out of me when my girlfriend would cook something for me to come home to. I wish I could have given her away to some conservative 4chan cuck.

I was able to convince her to eat out for a while, but she got fat. Double edged sword. Now I'm happily single.

>>11759022
do you throw $100s in the trash too, you fucking idiot?

>>11759027
I'm not sure if this is because you think my ex girlfriend should be everyone's perfect waifu just because she'd have a casserole ready at the end of the day, or if you think eating out is too expensive.

So which is it, desperate beta, poorfag, or both?

>>11750828
Why the ever loving fuck are you with her?

>gf
I didnt know i was on reddit

>>11759060
4channel and reddit are the same thing these days

sad fact

god forbid she does something by herself...

>>11758893
thanx, btw. i baked them myself.

>>11750782
Ask someone who looks interesting to marry you.

>>11756765
Chicks spend hours editing photos before posting them online.

what's a gf and where can i download one?

>>11750775
Where's my fucking chocolate girlfriend? Proof there is no loving god

>>11750775
We cook for each other

>tfw no gf

>>11750824
based and poopilled

>>11751142
if she refuses to change and you're not attracted to her anymore, pull the plug.

>>11753084
Holy fuck, are those your girlfriend's hands?

We have an agreement: She sucks the cocks, I cook the food. Go with your strengths.

Except Thursdays. We switch. Thing is, I'm much better at sucking cocks than she is at cooking.

>>11750775

>>11756478
>love getting fucked in the but
>too bad i dont like women
...

>>11750782
Just be yourself bro

>>11754573
Her IG is triste.insomnioo
She doesn't look as nice in the rest of her photos.

my ex and i would take turns cooking for each other
we also took turns eating each others assholes out XD

>>11750775
>women in 2019 knowing how to cook
heh

>>11756583
Absolutely based.

>>11765831
wow, thanx anon. you're my new favourite person!

>>11750775
She has really nice knuckles for a girl... maybe I'll come around and start dating girls again

>>11753065
>>>/r9k/

>>11750775
Holy shit i fucking hate thots

>>11750848
Based

>>11767239
That's one bad takedown picture of a pretty basic thor of I ever saw one

>>11750775
My wife is 10% the cook my mother was. I married her for the sex I suppose, but even that is meh now.
I want her to get better but with two young kids she doesn’t even try.
After they are old enough to go to school I’m going to start wanting her to try harder.
I either cook myself, get take away, or feel lazy and just put up with her shit tier food.
It’s a good thing she’s a pretty good mum, so at least she has that going for her but once my two sons are old enough to discern the difference between her cooking and actual food I hope she will be forced to learn how to at least learn a dozen or so dishes. Fuck her mum and older sisters for never teaching her how to cook.

>>11767250
wh-what

>>11750775
Me and my gf are making cheesecake later

>long distance retard girlfriend cooks on skype and drops phone in the pot

>>11753084
>squeeze parkay.
a-anon no

>>11751710
Probably some fat hole herself, then.

>>11751482
>chick with palsy who is really inspiring
Inspirin' muh dick. Imagine her flailing extra hard and accidently causing self harm as you fuck her into a mind bending orgasm.

>>11750828
>>11750852

>>11750775
How long did she hold that position for thta picture?

>>11756740
Wew her chest area is so heavily shopped haha what sad vapid whore

>>11756187
small
t. big nose girl

>>11750775
I cook, she cleans and washes dishes, we have a good system.

>>11770047
That's not a system, that's fucking standard.

My wife and I cook plenty, but she's a far better bakist than I am. I'm terrible with dough and precise measuring.

>>11770006
Post nose

>>11770006
i want to impregnate your snothole

>>11751142
>tfw your girlfriend has gained weight and her ass, tits, hips and tummy have gotten a little bigger and it's the hottest fucking thing ever
>plus she's a cute as fuck ginger with glasses
I'm addicted bros. it's interfering with my life. i can't even get off to porn anymore cause she's hotter.

>>11770180
>Wife lost weight for wedding and baby
>No longer thicc
I know this well

>>11750824
>vinegary
what?

>>11770060
Can't a system be standard?

we cook together
The only frustrating thing is she won't eat the same carb two days in a row

>>11767239
Is that Mr death grips gf

>>11750775
I cook for her.

>>11772088
No

>>11750775
>girlfriend
LOL

my gf poured the pasta into the water then put it on the stove. who the fuck do you think cooks?

>>11750775
Neither. Broke up with my girl when I discovered her child-like palate.

>>11751715
i do but i keep it a secret because it attacks my sexuality

Shut the FUCK UP JEVIN YOU STUPID NIGGER

I don't know if I cook better than her, but I cook more than her since I live alone and she still lives with her parents. Cooking for her is one of the things I love doing the most, she knows how to appreciate and compliment my cooking.

She's a godly baker though. Makes cakes and pies that I would pay top dollar for if they were sold in a bakery.

>>11767521
blessed incel kitty

>>11750775
>girlfriend
I haven't even held hands with a girl hahahahaahahahahahahahahahahahaha.

Never heard of such things but I bet they're nasty and want to hurt you.

>>11750775
g-g-girlfriend?

>>11753084
what is that in the tin-foil, it looks good
>everthing else looks trash tho

for all those posting tfw no gf i hope you all get gfs but stop posting tfw no gf please

also the lack of pictures of food in this thread is seriously upsetting

>>11775898
why hasnt she moved in yet

Bf cooks for me and I cook for him

She does sometimes but I'm much better at it. Two days ago she made us medium beef steak, potatoes in the oven and some salad. Was okay but not that creative or refined. 6/10

Also, she will learn soon that I'm leaving her

I'm not the best at cooking, but my boyfriend works really hard so I've been trying to get better at it. As of right now I only have a handful of recipes I can cook casually during the week, like pulled pork, roast chicken, fajitas, pasta, chili, stews, etc. On the weekend I'll try something new, or something that requires a little more effort.

I think the hard part is that I balance all our budgets/shopping, so I want to make nice things all the time but have to think of recipes that will keep well in the fridge, that uses the meat that's on sale that week, can be reheated from his lunchbox, etc etc. Once I graduate I can't wait to have a bigger budget.

>>11750775
It really depends, though I do supervise when she does because she's a little ditzy sometimes.

>>11750828

>bites during blowjobs

Am I the only one who doesn't mind a little playful nibbling?

>>11750775
Both. Depending on what we want and what our days were like. Sometimes it just makes more sense for me to cook what im good at, or for her to cook when ive had a hard day. Thats how relationships fucking work.

>>11750775
I cook for my wife, and she cooks for the dogs.

>>11750874
>muh sides

I'm a better cook than my wife, so I do a majority of it. She certainly loves to help with prep though, and she's a better baker than I.