/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>11029790
Why did mods ban the dinotendies thread?

How do you know when the pan is hot?

>>11029795
They hate fun.

>>11029798
touch it to find out

>>11029798
spit on it. if it spits back, it is hot.

>>11029795
Was there a post that killed it?

>>11029795
Never knew that was a thing

>>11029798
my mom said to touch the pan and I would learn. I never learned

>>11029802
4chan hates fun

>>11029805
My Uncle told me if you put water and it sizzles its ready, but than I add oil and it pops up and burns my torso.

>>11029795
because they are no fun allowed faggots

>>11029809
Well he tried starting a fire in a toilet. I don't think that's illegal, though maybe it's the part where he took a fish off the ground. That could have broken a law.

The thread 404'd on the front page so unless he deleted it himself, it must have been the mods.

>>11029809
Put a long drillbit connected to a cake mixer into a catfish mouth. It was pretty avant garde desu.

dino tendies is dead
he burned down his house

Do people actually make pasta sauce without meat? I'm doing it now but only because I fucked up last weekend and drank all my money before I could get to the grocery store. I call this "poorfag pasta." It's basically the same as my normal pasta sauce except there's no meat and I added more shredded carrot than usual.

>>11029841
He's posting on twitter still, and apparently he got the whole thing on video.

>>11029851
I do all the time
I usually just do pasta + tomato sauce or pasta + melt cheese on top

>>11029790
What is the best lettuce for lettuce wraps?

How do I cook rice?

>>11029851
>drank all my money
What a degenerate.

>>11029877
iceberg

>>11029881
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jf75I9LKhvg

>>11029859
l-link sama?

>>11029851
I'd rather just eat garlic and oil pasta if I had no meat.

>>11029885
Says the 4chin user. By the way, I'm drinking right now.

>>11029919
https://twitter.com/Dino_Tendies

>>11029885
Can't argue with you there, tbqh

>>11029795
From what I know dinotendies is permabanned, so his mere presence is ban-worthy. It sucks, it was the only good thread on this board.

>>11029795
Probably because it was more like /b/ shit. Just because it involved popcorn doesn't mean it really belonged here. His other threads that actually involved cooking were fine but the last one was kind of dumb.

>>11030024
There was cooking involved.

>>11030030
*holds up spork*

>>11029790
/sqt/ isn't a board.

>>11030069
>I don't know how generals work
do you go outside of this board at all? this is common

>>11030074
generals are the absolute worst cancer of this here websight, /sqt/ excepted

>>11030082
its worth a shot, there's always a million threads that get no where so making 1 general thread to house them all is not going to hurt more so help

How did he even get in there?

>>11030093
We have scientists working around the clock for an answer anon

Keep this retarded Reddit-tier shit on /fit/ you fucking retards. Lurk moar.

>>11030130
Anon, it's ok, why are you so angry. We are all friends here in this kitchen.

>>11030130
You're right. This thread is taking up a slot that could be another thread discussing the finer points of McDonald's

>>11029964
Jesus Christ my world is upside down now. Mods suck cock, they allow all this other trash but Dino is a step too far?

Iunno how dumb this question is, but:
I've been learning how to make burgers. The main obstacle was, of course, the shrinkage, but I figured out what to do here: I put some flour on the board and the meat so it doesn't stick and flatten it with a rolling pin. But I've been wondering if there's anything else I could use instead, maybe something to enhance the flavor?

>>11030339
How think do you make your burgers? If they're shrinking too much make a thinner, wider burger. Also press your thumb down to make a divot on top before cooking them. Idk if it actually does anything but people swear by it.

>>11030494
>think
Sorry. *thick

>>11029798
Cast iron: its smoking
Stainless: throw a drop of water on it. If it sizzles and moves around as a drop your good. Otherwise just heat it for as long as you know to heat it (experiance)
Teflon: ...

>>11030216
He was stupid and planted a bunch of chicken eggs in the sand but claimed they were endangered sea turtle eggs, a violation of federal law. He got rightly btfo, this coming from someone who enjoyed his threads. As dumb as he was he should have known better than that.

>>11029817
If you leave even a tiny bit of that water in the pan it will go nuclear when you add oil. It needs to be 100% dry

Whats the best amount of rum to a can of coke?

>>11030532
my dad normally does 1/2 and 1/2

>>11030601
Pussy drink
Jokes aside its the way to go if you have high tolerance and dont want to get fat(ter)

>>11030690
Imean adide from just scotch ( or bourbon)

>>11029790
Can anyone tell me where to get authentic tacos in Lexington Kentucky?

What do alcoholics do if they get an infection or something and have to take a medication that is not safe to drink alcohol with? Just say fuck it and not take the meds? drink a little bit less? I have always wondered.

can i throw this sweer potato in the oven like this? i coated the slices with olive oil. I threw in a date stamp because i knew no one would believe i had a sweer potato.

>>11031310
Either drink just enough to stop the shakes or ask the doctor for librium while you gotta take the meds I imagine.

>>11032437
I have no idea why you would do this instead of spreading them out

>>11032466
ok i spread them out thank

Got a pineapple waiting and thinking bout making some tepache but it has a little bit of mold growing on the sides. Is the rinds still usable for tepache? I know the bottom should have a little mold going..

Often when I make a tomato based sauce like bolognese I reduce it and it looks fine, but then when I plate everything the water from the sauce separates and my plater is full of water.
How can I prevent this? I don't want to use starch because I can taste it.

>>11030494
Yeah, shrinking isn't a problem anymore. I'd just like some ideas about what to use instead of plain-ass flour to make them not stick while flattening.

Since acidic marinade will make meat horribly tough, does that mean an alkali marinade will do the opposite and tenderise it?

>>11032921
I've never had this sticking problem you're talking about. But I also just use my hands to make burgers, a pin seems unnecessary? What do you season them with already?

>>11032632
Follow a recipe

>>11029790
>/sqt/
>not /qtddtot/
How much of a newfag can you be? God damn.

>>11033042
You're autism is showing

>>11033042
get yo doom cheats outta here son

>>11033048
>you're
God damn it. Now my autism is showing.
*Your

>>11030216
Why do you want to watch an angry retarded man fuck shit up in his nasty house?
It's not /ck/ related, it's not good content, and I reported the dinotendies thread 3 times and I'm glad it got deleted. Nasty trashy faggots like that and anyone who enjoyed his "content" can go back to /b/ where you came from, we have enough problems with relevant material on this board without some retard lolsorandumb shit and an army of enablers.

Where do i buy Cherry jam? i've already checked most supermarkets near me and no look.

>>11033083
Try buying online? Or local farmers markets if you have one.

>>11033114
Thanks anon. I won't buy online though. I shouldn't have to. It has to be available in some form or another where I live.

>>11033131
Definitely try farmer's markets. I'd be shocked if you can't find some there. Worst case scenario you could try to make your own.

>>11033083
Farmer's market, tourist trap farms (like apple picking places,) or your local hippie store.

Does milk with butter taste good?

>>11029881
I'm guessing you're the sommabich who always puts the rice threads up. Never mind these retards, you either have boiled rice or you have to soak the pot whilst you eat

>>11033155
You'd be shocked? That cunt could live in bumfuck nowhere, Albania for all you know. Fucking yanks

>>11033083
The important question is: where do you live? Because it's gonna be different for different countries.

>>11033055
Actual cunt

>>11033083
Cherry manufacturers>>11033692

>>11033692
Grab some buttermilk and give it a whirl

>>11034567
Well excuse me.

>>11031310
*rolls the dice*

FUCK YOU, LIVER!

>>11030519
So if i go put some eggs in the dirt say out loud "these are turtle eggs" im breaking the law?

>>11033049
7/10

>>11029790
Is fish meat?

>>11035154
Good question. Why are birds and fish separate?

Am I supposed to swallow my food and then take a drink of something, or is it okay to wash down the masticated food with the drink at the same time?

>>11035192
Unless something was unexpectedly dry im not sure why you would. But whateves.

>>11035202
Because we're not cultureless swine

>>11029790
HOW likely am I going to meet one of these Russian hotties these click baits keep tempting me with

>>11029925
keep going. don't stop. drink everything.

How can i cook things quitely? Im living with a friend right now but we work opposite shifts. I work nights and he has a morning shift.

What's the closest thing to CalorieMate that I don't have to import from Japan?

Hey /ck/,
I need to make prop (fake) tablets for a short. I looked into machines to make actual tablets but they are out of my budget, so I thought maybe I could just make a tablet like if it was chocolate and then cute it into little triangular pieces and it will sort of look like drugs.

What recipe would you use for that? I don't know a thing about cooking.
It should let me make it into a rather flat surface, and apply some dyes, then harden a bit but not become brittle so I can cut it nicely into small regular pieces and finally harden completely.

There's a popular treat in my country (I'll post a pic in the next post) whose base, I think, is made out of egg whites and sugar. It's very hard, and the white color should be easy to die.

I might use that, but I'd also be interested in other alternatives you might think off.

>>11035688
The treat I mentioned.
I googled the recipe and it is indeed made out of sugar and egg white. And also honey.

The only problem is when you buy it it is very hard and brittle. Do you think it will be less brittle when it is cooling off, if made at home? So I can cut it in regular pieces.

Are pickles on pizza good? I'm a pretty shit at cooking and have never made pizza before either

If i cook rice in chickenbroth will it taste good?

>>11035706
Yes but salt to taste based on the saltiness of the broth.

>>11035688
>I need to make prop (fake) tablets for a short

If they are fake, there is no need to actually make them edible. Just use molding clay or something.

>>11035714
Thanks. Im gonna make that for dinner with some grilled veggies.

>>11035735
You are right, didn't think of that

Resorted to buying boneless skinless chicken thighs due to budget constraints (normally go for breasts). I like to bake them into nuggets nuggets but I see the thighs have a fair amount of fat on them. Should I trim it or leave it on?

The recipe I'm calling for calls for Fresno peppers, and all my grocery has are "red chile peppers." I know they're not red jalapenos, and I can't find anything online about the difference between fresnos and red chiles. Are they interchangeable? Is my grocery store just being vague?

>>11036178
>I'm calling for calls for
Oh boy, I been drinkinh

>>11036178
Should be fine. Fresno’s are basically thin walled jalapeño.

>>11035685
Crush a 1aDay and mix it into a slurry of oil and flour, then fry it up

>>11029833

>>11031310
usually just says that because it will actually enhance the effects of both, which alcoholics are generally pretty ok with

>>11036511
It's more like your liver has work harder to detox both at the same time. It might make them stay in your system longer because your liver can't handle the load. This is usually bad for the liver long-term

Is aardvark sauce actually good?

>>11036797
Yeah but it's not worth shipping costs. It's just an inoffensive viscous hot sauce

For the last several nights I've bought cheap cuts of lamb or beef, and some tomatoes, red onion, and cucumber. I grill the meat and then shave the veggies with a buck knife and eat right out by the fire, pulling smoking cuts of meat and adorning them with raw onion and tomato. I love it and I cant stop doing it. What the fuck is wrong with me? Did I catch cave man disease?

>>11029790
>>11029790
>>11029790
>>11029790
>>11029790
Why is water wet?

>>11035701
Fucking retard
>>11035706
Idk if i pissed in your mouth would it taste like urine?
>>11035750
Vegetables are cancer
>>11036200
Fuck you
>>11035759
Of course you didn't you fucking numbnut
>>11036511
You're an alcoholic
>>11036805
Fucking poorfag, just get a job

>>11035688
Are you planning to sell them like they're real?

>>11036826
You're like some kind of automated nigger response generator. Pls go.

>>11036826 (You)

>>11036828
>nigger
>>>/pol/

>>11036837
No.

Bls..

Go...

>>11036826
literal cancer
>>11036828
Who tune fuck are you?
>>11036831
U nd very grub chi cindy Dustin McNabb

>>11036846
Who the fuck are you?

>>11035700
Are you an idiot that’s nougat and it’s orgasmic

>>11036853
I'm the guy on the ground floor ordering bacon

>>11036857
Fucking pleb doesn't even know the difference between nougat and white chocolate

>>11036867
What

>>11036827
No, I've never done anything illegal and I wouldn't like to get into trouble.
We just need to open a car's trunk and there to be many bags of drugs. I'm also making fake weed.

>>11029790
Onion milk or Soy cereal first?

Can you make chicken alfredo but make it with seafood instead?

>>11037266
Yes. It's called seafood alfredo.

>>11029790
anons, I recently got a sandwich press. give me some recommendations on recipes, whether it is a grilled sandwich or something else that can be cooked on such an appliance

>>11037337
Reuben. Rye, sauerkraut, corned beef or pastrami, swiss cheese, russian dressing. Pile it thick and compress with your press.

>>11037337
A melte con carne with emulcified egg white fedstus

>>11030847
trust me i wish i knew,
i hate this shit town and I wanna end it all so bad.
im so sick of being a professional chef.
fucking kill me

does homemade soup have much less sodium than canned soup?

>>11037492
Depends on whether you put as much sodium as in canned soup.

I changed my diet to mostly vegetarian and less sugar. Now my farts are stinking much more. Is this a good a bad sign?

>>11037684
Are your shits nice and easy? Sounds like your just getting a good dose of fiber

>>11037684
It's normal to have gas anytime you make significant dietary changes. It will go away as your gut bacteria adapt to your new diet.

>>11029790
I got my first set of stainless steel pans and I want to experience the world of deglazing but when I did it it smoked more than I see on cooking shows. Should I let the pan cool off to a degree or use more/less liquid to deglaze? And do I want have a pool left over or just use enough liquid to get the cooked shit off the pan?

what does white barbecue sauce taste like

>>11037798
Like mayo with S&P added.

>>11037802
I like all of those. is it worth making and what meat would it be best on on a grill? Also when I do meat with a sweet sauce I continually brush, flip, and close the lid every 3-5 minutes to get it like candy. I assume I can't do that now

>>11034966
federally protected species are srs bzns. tptb don't take kindly to idiots commiting fraud.

>>11036817
because it is a dipole molecule

>>11029790
How do i cook chicken legs?

>>11037719
>>11037738
It varies. Sometimes a bit fluid sometimes a bit solid but not to bad. Now that I think about it, there are small drops of blood on the toilet paper.

>>11029790
How do I put in the perfect amount of salt? I am too afraid of oversalting it so I always put in too little

>>11038156
It depends on what kind of food you're salting.

>>11038156
Follow a recipe, never cook without one or try "experimenting" because you don't know what you're doing.
Also put it some salt early, and finish salting it before serving.

Holy shit, I did not think my thread would get this popular.

>>11032956
>a pin seems unnecessary?
Eh, it helps make them more evenly flattened, nice 0.5cm/fifth of an inch thick, once they're done, they're about the size of a fast food joint one.
>What do you season them with already?
The basics - salt, pepper, bit of paprika. I hear getting some onion juice in them will make them better, but I never got around to figuring out how to do it.
Really, the flour isn't a _problem_ as it doesn't change the taste or texture of the meat, I was just hoping someone would have an idea that'd add something positive to them.

>>11038742
I've spent too much time improving my burgers, and I've found the miracle seasoning mix is black pepper, garlic power and onion powder, and salt the outsides just before cooking. Shrinkage isn't as much of an issue if you only loosely toss the ground meat to mix in the seasonings rather than squishing it into a paste.
Also, use cast iron.

>>11037821
>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood. Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.
That's a little much.

>>11037492
>>11037266
Some of these questions are the reason I wander into these threads.

Why does my neighbor keep masturbating while I'm in the shower?

>>11038983
How do you know what your neighbor is doing while you're in the shower?

>>11037813
You would be better off making sausage gravy

Has anyone here ever made/tried a Smashburger? Why do they always end up tasting better than regular burgers for me

>>11038994
D-doesn't everyone?

>>11039071
If youre gonna make one, you need 1 part Sonic and 1 part Mario and 2 parts Pikachu. A dash of Link and a sprits of Peach on top.

taste: regret

>>11029790
How do i grill perfect chicken breasts on a propane grill?

>>11040447
Yogurt marinade. It works wonders.

>>11029790
Can you use the salt you used to dry brine a piece of chicken to dry brine another piece of chicken? It's like 99% salt anyway so why not?

>>11040447
also butterfly them

>>11038136
Maybe you're just wiping too hard/too much on account of the occasional extra wetness.

>>11039200
>D-doesn't everyone?
Everyone masturbates while you're in the shower?

>>11040714
I don't see why not, but I wouldn't suggest using the salt for a total of more than 3-ish days, on account of possible bacteria growth.

>>11029851
I have but it just doesn't satisfy. Could you not spring for a can of anchovies?

>>11042572
y-yeah

>>11030030
>didn't even have the decency to remove the toilet seat
Oh god. The smell of burnt plastic.

>>11038156
Taste it you mong

Why is it called bacon mcdouble in certain coutries and double mcbacon in others? Please i haven't slept for days.

Why were al/ck/ threads banned? Looking through archives, they seem no worse than anything else on this board.

>>11042698
Were they?

>>11042698
McDonald's paid off hiro for the right to janny this board

>>11042708
yeh

>>11042625
Neat. I'll be thinking of you next time, Anon-kun. ;^)

>>11042713
I don't understand this as a response to the question.

>>11042726
Does mcd sell alcohol?
Then that thread should be about burgers.

>>11042726
okay.... let me put it in SIMPLERRRR FUCKING TEMRS FOR YA

>Why were al/ck/ threads banned? Looking through archives, they seem no worse than anything else on this board.

1. McDonalds is a restaurant
2. They paid money to Hiro in return for the ability to employ Janitors here
3. (pssstt.... read this one carefully, coward) The new McDonald's Janitors deleted the al/ck/ threads

Got anymore fucking brainbusters?

>>11042721
That's so sweet of you anon. <3

>>11042743
You sperg

>>11042720
this fucking website gets worse by the day

>>11042743
It's been really hard for you since they banned your containment board, hasn't it?

>>11042581
Can bacteria grow on salt?

>>11043114
no. AFAIK

>>11043114
Yes, they're called halophilic bacteria.

>>11042877
>thread gets banned
>he calls it a "board"
>literally calling a thread a board
>LITERALLY calling it the wrong word
>LITERALLY LOOKING LIKE AN IDIOT IN FRONT OF EVERYONE ON "THE CHAN"
lmao fail much??

>>11043256
This is a quality shitpost.

Is raw milk a meme?

>>11043330
>lol gaiz is food a maymay
Depends what the fuck you mean by "a meme." Raw milk has been around a fuck of a lot longer than pasteurized milk has.

>>11043330
No anon. Farmers drink it all the time. The only difference between raw milk and normal milk is that it's pasteurized. meaning it's been boiled of it's bugs and stuff. That's about it. My dad grew up on it. He said compared to pasteurized milk, it's a lot healthier. Reason is because it's like eating anything, it helps your immune system.

>>11043751
True that, that's why I exclusively drink rainwater.

>>11043762
That's understandable. Just be careful if you live next to the ocean or a lake. You might get a fish

>>11043751
>Reason is because it's like eating anything, it helps your immune system.
It's because the pasteurization process breaks down some of the vitamins in milk.

>>11043751
I thought the main difference was whole milk vs. "whole" milk
i.e. the raw stuff doesn't have the good cream and stuff separated out

i had some ground beef (93% lean, if that makes a difference) in the fridge for like a week inside of a plastic bag, and i just looked at it and now a lot of the blood came out into the bag, but i didn't even look at the ground beef part i just threw it in the freezer

is it safe to eat if i let it freeze solid for a few days? that will kill any bacteria right? i might go check to see if it stinks but how do i know 100% for sure if it is bad to eat and should be thrown out

>>11044293 here

ok it has kind of a very slight smell to it, but not horrendous or anything. wat do?

wont freezing it for like a week kill any bacteria? or does it fuck up the ground beef somehow

>>11043798
>the raw stuff doesn't have the good cream and stuff separated out
Whole milk on the store shelf still has all of that stuff. Homogenization makes it so that it all stays mixed together instead of separating out into a layer at the top.

>>11044293
>>11044304
The smell is a concern.
Cooking meat to an appropriate temperature does more to sterilize it than freezing would. The reason people don't simply cook rotten meat and eat it is because
1. It tastes bad
2. Waste products from the bacteria cultures growing in the meat can still make you ill

Just toss the meat, Anon, and don't forget about it next time. It's not worth risking your health.

>>11044293
1. Ground beef is more dangerous than steak because it has a far higher surface area on which bacteria can grow. While steak is a fairly safe meat to store, ground beef is something you ideally want to eat sooner rather than later.
2. Beef isn't shipped with blood in it, that's just water.
3. Freezing is not 100% effective at killing all harmful bacteria. When contaminated meat is frozen it's not guaranteed to eliminate the bacteria, only to slow the spread.
4. The smell test has been used since the dawn of time and with good reason, there are very few things in life worth risking food poisoning over.

>>11043347
>Raw milk has been around a fuck of a lot longer than pasteurized milk has.
So has Salmonella and listeria.

>>11044324
>Whole milk on the store shelf still has all of that stuff
Incorrect. The vast majority of the cream has been removed which is why "whole milk" is only 3% fat.

>>11038195
I have never used a recipe and all my meals turn out just fine. The first step is to not be a retard. Using complementary ingredients and flavours works wonders.
>t. Only started cooking a year ago yet everyone who tastes my meals compliments me

>>11032437
It's shopped

Are there any other hard cheeses that go with chicken besides parmesan?

>>11043249
Is that a thing that is found on meat or is that like the equivalent of those rare bacteria that live in volcanoes?

>>11043790
That too anon. I did forget this.

>>11044775
Gouda and havarti are my personal favorites.

>>11044352
>Beef isn't shipped with blood in it, that's just water.
Well, it's hemoglobin. Basically the same thing.

>>11044374
3.25-5%, just the way it came out of the cow's tit.

Is sushi actually practical or just a presentation thing?

>>11029881
Get a rice cooker, also wash it. I dont consider myself a bad cook but I fuck up rice constantly if I dont use a cooker.

>>11035688
Why not get mint tums? cut them in to triangles with a razor blade and then powder the rest to make fake coke. you could also buy the non mint ones for the colors you are talking about

>>11029790
how the fuck do you score bread

>>11032632
XANTHAN GUM. Flavourless and works with a very tiny amount.

>>11029790
How do I make chicken and rice taste good.

I currently baked chicken breast plain.
I make plain white rice.
I add salt, pepper, and a bit of hoysen garlic sauce.

How do I cook?

>>11045693
1) if you're going to bake the chicken, you need to season it first.

2) If you're going to bake the chicken you should slice it into bite-sized pieces, season it and toss it in a sauce first.

3) Rice is better if you make it with stock instead of water.

4) Rice should be make with salt.

5) What do you have against vegetables? Slice some up, toss them with the chicken and bake them as well. You can also add diced vegetables to the rice. Soft-crisp veg and subtlety flavored rice is the result.

6) Wwhy limit yourself to Hoisen sauce? Try Salsa, Plum sauce, Oyster Sauce, Curry sauces (especially korma curry if you stick with the chicken motif), Italian salad dressing, pesto, Alfredo (Red sauce does not go well with rice, use pasta instead, also, you should dredge the chicken in Parmesan and fry it before using red sauce).

7) Why limit yourself to chicken? Try pork, beef, lamb, goat, mutton, fish, shellfish, hell, if it's made of meat, try cooking and eating it.

8) why do you have seasonings? Ignore the call of the mild anon. The entire seasonings section is calling out to you. Listen for it.

9) Buy/torrent/DL a fucking cookbook. Preferably more than one. Also bookmark allrecipies and foodnetwork.

10) Start watching Good Eats on YouTube. Alton Brown will learn ya right.

I have a pack of chicken thinghs that have been sitting in the bottom of the fridge for a week that I forgot about. It didn't look bad but it had a slight wine-ish smell to it. Made a curry with half of it that tastes fine but the other half I baked has a little wine taste to the meat. Am I going to die if I eat this stuff? It's the only protein I have for the next few days until I get paid.

>>11045746
Oh and for the record i've smelled off chicken before and i've smelled spoiled chicken before. This is nothing close to either which is the only reason i'm asking.

>>11045746
>Am I going to die if I eat this stuff?
No. It's fine.

>>11029851
Yeah my dude it's called Marinara

>>11029877
Iceberg or butter depending how much crunch you want.

>>11045022
>Well, it's hemoglobin. Basically the same thing.
No, it's not.

>>11036817
Water isn't wet. Other things that come into contact with it are.

>>11029851
Vegetable Alfredo is pretty damned good if you have plenty of mushrooms. Red sauce is OK without meat, but always feels kinda thin to me. You can do pesto veg with pasta. Also, vegetable stir-fry goes well on pasta.

bump

Roasting a chicken Monday. Typically, I serve it with a white wine jus but I decided to go gravy this time. The question is: assuming you like both about equally, would you go regular or giblet?

>>11043330
THAT FUCKING DOES IT!
/ck/
YOU NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP AS A COLLECTIVE WHOLE AND GET THE FUCK OUT! NO, SERIOUSLY. LEAVE, LEAVE THE INTERNET FOR FUCKING EVER. BUT THAT WON'T HAPPEN, WILL IT? I'M STUCK WITH YOU FOR A FUCKING ETERNITY. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST. YOU IDIOTS SPOUT MEME THIS, MEME THAT. DO YOU EVEN KNOW THE DEFINITION OF THE WORD MEME? DO YOU UNDERSTAND THAT IT PREDATES EVERYTHING YOU ARE AND HAVE EVER BEEN? THAT IT PREDATES YOUR FUCKING GRAND MOTHER'S GREAT AUNT WHO SURVIVED WORLD WAR I AND EVEN BEYOND THAT?!!!

YOU HAVE NO IDEA HOW TO USE THE WORD MEME CORRECTLY. YOU ARE ABSOLUTE SHITS WHEN IT COMES TO THE ENGLISH LANGUAGE. I AM SO SICK AND TIRED OF SEEING THE WORD MEME BE USED IN THE WRONG MANNER. THE WORD MEME IS A FUCKING MEME OF ITSELF SINCE YOU FAGGOTFUCKS CAN'T USE IT CORRECTLY!
DO YOU EVEN UNDERSTAND HOW TO USE THE TERM ''BAIT'' PROPERLY OR WHERE TO APPLY IT SO IT ACTUALLY MEANS WHAT YOU'RE IMPLYING?!

YOU'RE CASUALLY BY PASSING AN INTELLECTUAL WHO HAS DENOUNCED YOUR WORTH IN THIS WIDE FUCKING UNIVERSE AND DETAILED YOUR EXISTENCE DOWN TO THE VERY CORE OF UTTER SPEWED NOTHINGNESS. YOU'RE LITERALLY STUPID. RETARDED.

I STRONGLY BELIEVE YOU SUFFER FROM SOME KIND OF MENTAL ILLNESS. THE WHOLE OF YOU DO. YOU SEE SOMEONE ELSE USE THE TERM INCORRECTLY THEN LABEL ANYONE WHO IS DESTROYING YOU VERBALLY, IN-FRONT OF YOUR ANONYMOUS PALS, AND SAY EVERY POST THEY MAKE IS '' A TROLL '' '' A BAIT '' '' A MEME.'' I FUCKING HATE YOU! I WANT ALL OF YOUR ADDRESSES, RIGHT NOW! POST THEM IN THIS THREAD AT THIS FUCKING INSTANCE! YOU WILL NOT POST TRUMP'S TOWER OR THE WHITE HOUSE. YOU'LL POST YOUR ACTUAL ADDRESS AND WAIT FOR WHAT COMES, DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME?

>>11048204
Kys pls

>>11048204
I SWEAR TO GOD PEOPLE LIKE YOU ARE THE REASON WHY THERE ARE SO FEW GOOD CHEFS AND PEOPLE WHO LOVE COOKING! YOU MAKE ME SO ANGRY I POP AN ANGER BONER! LIKE GOD DAMN IM RAGING HARD RIGHT NOW! FUCKING GOD DAMN IT! YOU'RE SO INCOMPETENT YOU CAN'T EVEN BOIL WATER! I DON'T EVEN TRUST YOU WITH COOKING RAMEN NOODLES! IT'S SO GOD DAMN EASY YET YOU SOME HOW MANAGE TO FUCK IT UP. HOW DO YOU FUCK UP RAMEN NOODLES? YOU'RE THE GUY IN THE KITCHEN WHO CUTS LETTUS WRONG! I CAN'T STAND PEOPLE LIKE YOU CAUSE ALL YOU DO IS ASK HOW TO DO THE SIMPLIST TASKS! GOD DAMN YOU MAKE ME WANT TO TAKE MY NICE COLD STEEL KNIVES AND SLIT MY WRISTS IN A BATH AND BLEED OUT TILL IM DEAD!

How'd I do /ck/?

Anyone have tips to make whipped egg whites with stiff peaks easier with just a whisk?

>>11048502
great until the very end

>>11048527
dang it. I'll work on it.

Can nuts go bad?
A friend of mine gave me an opened jar of peanuts and an opened bag of pecans that are both at least 6 months old.
I tried a bit, they taste fine to me. The pecans at least are hard to find here.

>>11049313
Commonly, things like nuts are a dry based food, at best they would dry up and just have almost no taste, basically tasting stale. Canned foods — if sealed right — can almost last almost forever
- Adam Ruins everything (source)

>>11049515
If it won't make me sick I'm gonna enjoy these pecans, bro.

Tell me about defrosting meat. My family is kind of white trash and they would leave meat on the counter overnight. I hear you're not supposed to do that. Then again, none of us have died from it, as far as I know. What is the proper procedure for defrosting meat?

>>11049537
That's ok as long as it's wrapped up. A faster method is to put it in a cold water bath and elt it sit there for about an hour. It should work fine. Also wrapped up. My mom does it all the time, you're not white trahs anon lol.

You're only white trash if you fuck yourt cousin and or you have a mullet.

>>11043330
Mostly, old fucks going on about the good old days.

>Pasteurized milk has nearly no chance of making you shit yourself to death, unpasteurized has worryingly high chance of doing so.

>>11048522
add creme de tartar

>>11029790
watching reviewbrah has my craving greasey shitty food

what should i go get

>>11043330
pasteurization became a commonplace thing for a good reason

>>11049589
taco bell
can't go wrong

>>11049615
>>11044359
>>11049546
Does not make raw milk a meme.

While pasteurization is a good thing, the primary issue (probiotics) could be solved by cleaning your animals teats thoroughly and free-ranging the beasts rather than factory-farming them to cut down on exposure to ambient feces. The secondary issue (taste) could really be solved by going to slow pasteurization rather than UHT/HHST or other flash pasteurization.

>>11044374
>>11045026
Cow milk usually tops out around 3-4%. Little if any of the fat (cream) is skimmed from whole drinking milk.

Compare this to goat milk which usually tops out at 6% (except for Pygmy Nigerians which tops at about 11%). The milkfat in goat milk is also significantly more digestible than that of cow milk,

>>11045124
With a knife.

>>11035688
Buy a box of Good'n'Plenty. Those things look pretty much like some of the drugs I've seen. Alternatively, buy a package of empty gelcaps and fill them with something that looks right. Cake sprinkles or powdered food coloring or some shit.

>>11049862
goat milk is fucking great and I don't understand why more people don't drink it

>>11048059
bump for answer

>>11049886
Because the fucking FDA has made it illegal to sell goat milk for human consumption.

What's the easiest way to cook a block of tofu? I'm a barely functioning retard when it comes to food, so cooking shit in a pan is scary and stressful to me.

>>11049988
look up a recipe for tofu "bolognese". just so you know what to look for, basically its crumbling the tofu up and frying it in oil with onions until it browns. then you add tomato paste, chopped tomatoes, red wine and stuff like that to make a bolognese like normal. in terms of spices also pretend its bolognese (basil, oregano, the usual mediterranean suspects). impossible to fuck up and tastes all right. still prefer minced meat.

>>11050007
Perhaps I wasn't clear. I require specific instructions for putting the tofu on a pan and cooking it. I was just planning on eating it raw. How much oil? For how long?

>>11050027
dont do that it always comes out tasting like nothing

>>11050034
>it always comes out tasting like nothing
Literally don't care. I had to live off the same 1000cal/day meal in Japan, consisting of tofu, chicken liver and wombok for half a year. Now as long as a food doesn't taste outright horrible I could easily eat it for every meal of every day.

>>11050043
but if you could make something tasty with 15 min extra effort, why eat shit every day?

>>11049940
Regular. Gibblet gravy always has a weird flavor to it. Probably the residual spinal fluid.

>>11050048
Guess I could chuck some shit in there with it. Can I eat tofu uncooked btw?

>>11050085
you can do that if you hate yourself, its not dangerous. at that point you can just eat a can of beans cold though, thats cheaper and probably tastier

>>11030847
Sabor is bretty good

Otherwise get a manual labor job and have your coworkers bring something. This one guy I worked with would occasionally bring tamales for everyone.

>>11049985
When? I can go to my local big chain supermarket and buy some right now in both fresh and powdered forms, I think. I bought fresh goat's milk a year or so ago, anyway.

What's good to eat with applesauce?
Also, what should I cook with my red lentils, apart from daal?

>>11048522
Add a pinch of salt.
Make sure there is NO fat and NO yolk at all, half a drop will fuck up the chemistry of the whole thing. Wash your bowl and whip with soap if you used them previously with something containing fat.
Add sugar before raising the eggs if you're making meringue, it helps a lot.

>>11050027
If you want to fry it like a steak, you'll have to dry it, like shown here : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CeZlih4DDNg
It'll still taste of fried nothingness if you don't add sauce and spices.
Also look into soylent and similar products, it may be the exact thing you need.

>>11043798
It might be different in your country but as far as im concerned milk is first skimmed of all fat and then brought to the desired percentage with the skimmed cream

>>11051471
Potato pancakes. I eat red lentils for all that preparable, cheap filling protein, i just get premade gravy (not powdered stuff but gelatinous) fry up onions (thats it because i want to keep for a couple days, you might wanna give lentil stew a go), though i leave the house at 7am, come back home at 8pm and smoke so im rather easily satisfied food wise

>>11051218
And if you read the packaging it'll say "not for human consumption" or "pet milk" or "pet food" on it somewhere.

The claim is that goat udders are too low to the ground making it more likely the teats will become infected with Lysteria or E.Coli and thus be more likely to transmit it to the milk.

Yes it's bullshit and yes it's obviously a put-up job funded by the dairy industry, but that's the way it is.

>>11051471
>What's good to eat with applesauce
Pork. Pork chops served with applesauce is a southern classic. Also goes will with goat.

>red lentils
Use them to make soup or to add color and sweetness to humus

does Dr. Pepper have Pepper in it?

>>11030526
You're a fucking autist, you literally wet your hand enough to flick a few drops that will skitter across the pan if its hot enough. You don't dump a cup of water in

Is there some secret to cooking with cottage cheese?
On it's own it tastes fine, but when I put it in eggs or oatmeal or something it makes the whole thing taste bland.

>>11029790
Kind of new to /ck/

Any tips, suggestions or anything to know?

>>11054244
What are you looking for specific?

why do my rice taste bad

>>11054279
Why aren't you sticking your dick in it?

>>11054279
rinse your rice 2 or 3 times with water before cooking it

>>11029790
Does your dog like the president?

>>11054324
My puppers is in heaven anon

>>11054329
Is the sun hot?

>>11054335
No. The sun is an illusion created by the government because the world isn't real. We are all in the Matrix.

>>11029790
>meta allowed
When did this board turn to shit? I swear it didn't used to be as full of blatant shitposting as it has been recently?

>>11054340
Is water wet?

>>11054355
*kernel Panicked!*

>>11054361
Are you a tough guy?

>>11054372

>>11054380
Do you like peanutbutter?

>>11054390
Who fucking told you?

>>11054393
Do you know what im trying to refrence?

>>11054400
No.

>>11054402
Ive failed you

>>11054406
Darn it anon. I'm sorry.

>>11054414
Its fine its better than the inifinte amounts of furry and anime porn threads

>>11054427
I believe it anon.

>>11054430
Are you jesus?

>>11054435
Thank God I'm not or my dad would be pissed.

>>11054442
Are you from the fucking goddamn future?

>>11054454
You dont want that answer man.

>>11054458
But I do daddy peppy.

>>11054474
Don't goto new york in dec 12 2018. That's all I'm allowed to say

>>11054484
K

>>11054261
Mostly how to cook interesting meals and for ways to get into it as a hobby. I hear it attracts the ladies. And also can help you lose weight

>>11054501
I would say, google simple things, learn to make an omelet and scrambled eggs and then slowly build from there. I can cook about anything. I went to culinary for a moment and then started to teach myself a lot of diferent things. Over time, I figured out what is good and not. How to make something amazing and so on. I would say, if you want to learn, literally watch youtube shit. There's tons of good chefs on them. Binging with Babbish is a great start. Also Bon Apetite

>>11054501
Follow some youtube channels, look for recipes in the booru or whatever it's called, cook, learn from your mistakes, cook again. Start simple.

>>11055043
2nd this

>>11043330
People have been doing it for practically all human history as long as agriculture has existed, it only became taboo from (((scientific research))) aka pay for the pasteurization goy

>>11056936
pasteurization was invented for a reason you dork

what are some cheap and easy dinner recipes that you can make with just a sauce pan and a frying pan?
I just moved into a new place and that's all I have at the moment
there's an oven in the unit as well, but it's a bit flaky

>>11056973
Sure, but at same time, you get use to certain things. There was an ep of wife swap where 1 was from a meat eating family and the other was from a vegi family. The meat mom made aligator one night and then almost ASAP they had to take the daughter to the emergency room cause her body didn't know what meat was.

>>11057039
How to Make egg drop soup
(for 1 bowl)
1. 1 egg
2. 1 cup of chicken broth
3. 1 tbs of soy sauce
4. 1 tsp of ginger
5. chopped chives
7. 1 tbs of corn starch!

What to do!
BEFORE heating up the chicken broth, stir in the corn starch on cold. Let it melt, turn on the heat and let it get to a boil, turn it down then add in the soy sauce and ginger and stir it up.

Now crack the egg but DO NOT add in the egg yet. What you're going to do is add in the white and let it swirl in and then try to keep the yolk in till have the white as much out as possible. Now beat the yolk and then add it in. Why? This will allow it to mix better. Drizzle it. Let it cook for about 2 minutes, when you see it hardening up try to chop them up in to smaller bits.

Now add in the chives and fold over the soup. Let it cook for another 3 minutes on low and server

>>11057296
New thread

>>11057308
My thread isn't even remotely dead man. But I do appreciate you helping out

>>11057320
No problem, I do think 300 is the bump limit on /ck/ though so I was just trying to stay ahead of the curve

>>11057332
currently we are on page 1 and its not in the read. This board is a bit slower, It hink 500 is ...?

>>11057342
The webm threads always prune around 315. Still, my bad. Not meaning to be counterproductive

>>11029881
talk to this guy

>>11029877
Butter or Bibb as they actually wrap and iceberg if you have enough and want a great crunch of freshness

Why does Chinese fried rice come out yellow

>>11032437
Sure they will cook unevenly where they are touching but you can man

>>11032946
Yes as that's all the 'meat tenderizer' powder in the spice aisle is
That, egg whites and baking powder are typically the only alkaline things you find in a kitchen everything else is acidic or neutral because almost all veggies abd fruits are slightly acidic in nature as is milk (it's very slightly though but if you blanch veggies the water you used will have a more acidic ph)

>>11034554
Get a Thai Rice Steamer shit will change your life for the best

>>11035154
>>11035187
Structurally speaking no or at least not from a science perspective. Meat is typically fibres that tighten up when denatured by heat where as fish is layers that usually flake, birds are fibres but they peel rather than bind tighter like cow flesh

>>11035644
Stick to braised meats and stews?

>>11035701
They can be as is kimchi pizza with egg and sausage especially white kimchi (a Korean version of saurkraut with seaweed) just pair it with a something to cut the acidity and pairs well with saltiness like a drizzle of crema and pepperonis

>>11035948
Trim off any fat at the edges it's the same as the breast in that way

>>11036811
Nah but that sounds good as fuck though

>>11037266
I'll bet you add cream to your burre blanc you repugnant piece of shit

>>11037454
You are burned out and in a food dessert take a break bro you will fall in love with it again in time travel q little if you can

>>11037794
Use more liquid and yeah a small pool is fine just let it reduce before doing anything else it will take like 30 seconds

>>11037875
Fry them fuckers up

>>11038156
Taste as you go and get a little bolder with it you will only learn the right levels by oversalting a dish or two until you find that sweet spot

>>11042698
Never visited them alot but from my understanding they were frequently off topic with name/avatarfags just talking personal life shit and not food/cooking so they were banished to/soc/ since that's a board that would suit them better

>>11044304
Freezing doesn't kill off alot of bacteria just sort of stops them in place until they thaw out and alot of what gets you sick is bacterial waste that isn't destroyed by cooking when in doubt throw it out

>>11044775
Dutch Goudas, Pectarino is also good as is ricotta salatta

>>11045124
Slash an X in the top of the dough right before you put it in the oven

>>11045746
No it's on its way out but generally that's the surface of the chicken going bad first in a professional kitchen where chef's are shoemakers or the owner is niggardly they would wash the chicken I'm white wine bath before cooking it to counteract that

>>11049313
They can stale but they won't make you sick and generally even that takes a really long time

>>11049537
That's bad as it's dangerous to let it sit in room temp for that long (if you defrost it and cook immediately it's less bad). Submerge it in cold water until it defrosts or in the fridge overnight are better safer ways to defrost

>>11049862
That's because goat milk is naturally homogenous coming out of the goat you need s specialized machine to get the creme from it for something like goat butter

>>11054202
Generally you don't cook it with heat add it in cold for something like muesli or just with mixed fruit

>>11054343
Honestly we've been here for awhile now it's not getting any better