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/ck/ - Food & Cooking

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10967500 No.10967500 [Reply] [Original]

>be me
>cashier at Walgreens
>shitty job but it pays the bills while I wait to go back to school in spring
>slow night, not many customers
>suddenly see the fattest of fat fat fucks approaching register
>cart full of Mountain Dew and Hot Pockets
>has so much fat that he has to lean on the cart to assist him with walking
>so fat that he won't take anything out of the cart, makes me scan everything while it's still in cart
>isthisfaggotserious.jpg
>a guy walks in only wanting a 20oz Pepsi, has to wait behind Fatty McGee
>total comes to 78 dollars
>shoves sweaty $100 bill in my face like an asshole
>mark it to make sure it's legit, go to put it in the register
>"wait let me give you the (whatever) cents"
>starts searching in pockets for approximately a decade looking for change
>by this point there are four people waiting behind Fatfuck McFatterson
>all visibly upset that they have to wait for him
>I call for second cashier
>everyone immediately goes to his line to stop dealing with all the fat
>this guy is seriously now running out of breath searching for change
>starts wheezing
>finally makes the change so I can give him all bills back
>second cashier's line empties
>guy spends a couple minutes sorting hot pockets, wallet, fat
>"I can't wait to get home and go to bed, it's been a long day"
>making small talk I say, "Long day at work?"
>"oh no, I don't have a job, I borrowed that money from my mom"
>"So what do you do?"
>"I moderate the cooking board on 4chan"
>mfw

>> No.10967509

>>10967500
>working at walmart
>being surprised at fat people
You're probably a bit heavy yourself

>> No.10967523

>>10967509
Nice reading comprehension, newfag

>> No.10967527

>>10967500
Yeah, well, at least he doesn't drink alcohol.

>> No.10967540

>>10967500
Kek got me, never thought I'd find a new West Philadelphia or Walk the Dinosaur.

>> No.10967549

>>10967500
Kek

>> No.10967561

>be with a group of friends at a bar one night
>watching Diners, Dives, and Drive-Ins together
>there’s a new guy at the bar
>chris, the bartender, says he’s the new janitor
>but he does a lot more than mop floors
>this fat, short, smelly guy goes table to table, making sure everyone is talking about food and drinks and only food and drinks
>kinda sucks the fun out of the whole place but we try to ignore him
>watch the show, have fun
>show is over, talk about our favorite restaurants and other stuff
>eventually the conversation drifts more towards general shit like life
>the janitor comes waddling over, hot pocket in his hand
>what do you think you’re doing?
>uhh, just talking about shit, I don’t believe this is any of your-
>ARE YOU AWARE THAT THIS IS A EATERY & BAR MEANT FOR FOOD DISCUSSION ONLY
>dude the show is over, I don’t think it’s that bad if we talk-
>NO, he says, lips smacking, THIS IS A EATERY & BAR AND YOU WILL DISCUSS ONLY FOOD HERE
>dude, you’re spraying hot pockets in my face, please move-
>YOU CANNOT BAD MOUTH A MEMBER OF THE STAFF LIKE THAT
>the only one with a bad mouth here is you
>I WILL HAVE YOU REMOVED
>fuck off, you can’t make is do shit
>this guy starts fuming because we’re right. He doesn’t even have any real power
>he has to call the bouncer to remove us
>see him stuffing down another hot pocket as we leave
>the bouncer tells us we’ve been banned from the establishment for 72 hours
>demand to see the owner
>he says we can’t because we’ve been banned for 72 hours or less
>what kind of fucking bullshit is that
>ask them how much they pay that bozo janitor
>nothing, he does it for free

>> No.10968618

>>10967500
>Be me
>No wallmart near me
>Go to one for first time
>All fat pepole buying candy bars and useless shit

>> No.10968638

>>10967500
>7 replies
>No images
Fuck off samwfag

>> No.10968841

>>10968638
>8 replies, 8 IPs
Fuck off newfag

>> No.10968857

>>10967561
this is accurate except that the janitor can remove you himself, he just has to ask permission for it to stick

>> No.10968876
File: 98 KB, 499x817, E2518A25-45EE-409B-AB7C-3C1AFA6ECCFE.jpg [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10968876

>>10967500
>I read the whole thing

>> No.10968906

>>10967509
He said Walgreens you retarded dicksucker
>>10967500
>buying hot pockets at Walgreens
I'm glad this is fake

>> No.10968937
File: 3.03 MB, 218x272, Hillbot Malfunctions.gif [View same] [iqdb] [saucenao] [google]
10968937

>>10967509
>>working at walmart

>> No.10969481

>>10968906
>fake
how do you deduce this?
shitty walgreens sells shitty hot pockets
fatass who gets money from mom to pay for his hot pockets is not concerned with overpaying for them at shitty walgreens