/ck/ - Food & Cooking

Microwaving pizza is gross anyway, the only good leftover pizza is pizza that has been left out and unrefridgerrated

Hahahahaha

>try making some kvass
>don't have a big fuckoff glass jar, so i just put it in a 2 liter bottle
>put in a little too much yeast, eh fuck it, more alcohol :^)
>sleeping
>hear a loud bang
>look around the house to see what it was
>it's 4 in the fucking morning and there's fermented shitwater all over my kitchen ceiling

i'm cleaning up right now
it's a fucking mess, i'll likely have to paint over it

>>10919695
pic related

>>10919709
Kewl

>>10919723
no bud it's totally fucked
it's sugary, and the whole room smells like fermented real bad

I left the blender alone and it happened. Everywhere. And I mean everywhere. You are not alone

>>10919730
Dude you're going to be SWARMED with ants tomorrow haha

>>10919761
which is why i'm busting my ass on a stepladder right now instead of going back to bed

>>10919695
ur fookin stoopid m8

i've cleaned the ceiling best as i can, there's a very faint brown shadow and you can see individual drops of you look closely, so that's fucked, but i got all of the actual thing out
cleaning the counter and all the shit that was on there right now
and i'm gonna mop the floor later, quite a bit of it got on the floor yeah

>>10919818
no buly pls

>>10919865
The floor is where insects start, anon. Most of the rest is cosmetic.

>>10919533

THIS.SO.MUCH.

If you reheat pizza put it under the grill in your oven. This is the only legit way.

>>10919709
Are Yuropoors’ homes really this dirty?

>>10919910
That's called a broiler, anon. I prefer a cast iron crisping up the crust from under with a lid on top. Microwave or cold from the fridge also up there for convenience sake.

>>10919921

Yes your method is even better but with the microwave I have to disagree. I literally can not eat food reheated in a microwave. It tastes different and disgusting, especially meat.

>>10919906
i had already soaked up most of it with some towels before getting started with the ceiling, it just wasn't thoroughly done
because i wanted to get onto the ceiling so it wouldn't stain
but oh well, it did already

>>10919920
that was LITERALLY a few minutes after a huge shitwater explosion
the rest of the ceiling everywhere in my house is spotless

>>10919920

>being this mutthurt about being overweight

kek

>>10919972
Hey dumbass, how do you not know how to nigger-rig a pin-pricked balloon over a fermenting substance? I knew this when I was a dipshit high-schooler making sugar wine. Also, better get some rug cleaner or at the very least soak it down with a white vinegar solution.

>>10919921
This man is correct
Cast iron with some oil, and a top. It’s perfect.

>>10919990
>how do you not know how to nigger-rig a pin-pricked balloon over a fermenting substance?
the recipe said to put it in a big hermetically sealable glass jar, closest thing i had was a 2 liter plastic bottle
i thought it'd be ok but clearly i went quite a bit overboard with the yeast
and it's about 28 °C inside too, which surely contributed
>Also, better get some rug cleaner or at the very least soak it down with a white vinegar solution.
for the ceiling?

>>10920014
Ceiling is more of a staining issue. Assuming you're in an apartment, then it depends if you want to tell to or conceal it from your landlord because he'd have a jar of the touch-up paint. May want to clean it up with something decent (vinegar solution does all, but bleach solution or multipurpose 409 isn't out of the question), then maybe nigger-rig some white-out with goof-off and blend the outside paint into the stain.

The first and last time I met my wife's family from Maine, they found out that I make my own pizza every weekend and so decided to make pizza for me. It was the worst pizza I have ever eaten.

First problem, the crust was that Jiffy brand just add water pizza crust that is an abomination. They didn't even bother to prebake it, so it came out underdone.
Then we had the toppings. Store Brand pasta sauce that had been sitting in their fridge. American cheese. Sausage, which would be fine, except it was maple flavored breakfast sausage.

Knowing that I was a big fan of pizza, they gave me the largest slice and insisted that I eat first, and then proceeded to ask me about what I thought of it and such.

To this day, I kind of hope that they were just trolling me, but I'll never find out because we both agreed to never see them ever again. It's been 8 years since and we have not spoken to that side of the family since.

done with the counter and appliances, man it was soaked with the shit
but hey, it's not all bad, a little bit was left in the bottle :^)
i'm filtering it and then i'll give it a taste

>>10920046
thanks, i'll keep that in mind

>>10919985
>using reddit spacing
Go home summerfag>>10919990

>>10919121
Yeah, I'm gonna have to say "ShitThatNeverHappened.txt"

You don't go from politely waiting for food to throwing other people's plates over that.
Just grow up and tell him you're not hungry.

>>10919910
I've had good results from a pan and just putting it on aluminum foil on top of a hot woodstove.

>>10919121
Not as bad as this, but I help my mom cook, and she has no concept of what ingredients are and how to use them.

Its fucking bizaare, cuz she's always cooked, and is full of info if I need to borrow a unitasker or something, but you just can't tell her shit cuz she instantly turns snappy and fights with you.

The three examples that come to mind:
1. she vetoed putting a quarter-teaspoon of salt into some dessert she was making because, "I don't want it to be salty".
2. She had a recipe that called for a tablespoon of mustard, and she starts reaching for the DRY mustard. And when I ask her if the recipe said to use dry or mustard sauce, she's like, "What does it fucking matter?"
3. Similar to 2, she got the idea to make Tomato soup. Found some recipe that called for an insane amount of basil to begin with, and then she used dry instead of fresh without reducing the amount (Cuz what's the difference?)

>>10920107
well that was nasty
it tastes real strong like yeast, with a teeny tiny bit of alcohol
not knocking kvass as a whole though, it's probably decent if you don't fuck it up in half a dozen different ways

anyway, blogposting's over, thanks for tagging along fellas
>6:10 AM
here's hoping i can get a few more hours of sleep in, and that my kitchen isn't filled with ants when i wake up

>>10920186
Ugh. My mother is the same way. She does all sorts of weird substitutions and then blames the recipe and won't cook it ever again. Like, I cooked that same fucking recipe and it was delicious, what did you fuck up?

>>10920139
>Doubting the immaturity of this board
Do you know where we are?

>Eating a hot pocket
>Cold in the middle

>>10920196
You probably lost everything in the top and were left with the dregs. I can say a whole lot of shoulda's, but the best you can do now is filter and freeze-distill, then chug down the resulting disgusting concoction.

a little update on the situation
no ants or any other insects in my kitchen, so that's good
the smell is pretty bad though, i've opened all the windows trying to get some air flowing

>>10920284
i threw everything down the drain last night
might try to make it again and not fuck it up

>>10920102

Lmao just because of pizza?