/ck/ - Food & Cooking

why does every webm now cut off before the virgin guy. its a fucking conspiracy by that guy I tell ya

>>10895002
no one wants virgin stool boy fertilizing their egg webms

>>10894997
>filename
good job anon

>>10895015
baste

>>10895026
>garlic peel

>>10895026
>free range eggs
oh thank god, I dont know what I would do if they werent free range.

>>10895026
>guanciale chopped into fucking mash
>garlic
>putting pepper onto frying guanciale
no wonder oliver's restaurants are going bankrupt
he cant even make a carbonara properly

>>10895047
>>10895219
Oh hey guys. I also watched the same youtube video you did.

>>10895026
>garlic
I mean the addition is warranted but it deviates

>>10895246
and?

>>10895014
>Overcooked French omelet

>>10895386
>a whole fucking avocado
>healthy

Enjoy your 800 calories you fat cunt

haha lol egg

>>10895386
just get it over with and do porn already

>>10895386
God the movements of this dumb cunt annoys me so much

>>10895403
>not knowing that healthy =/= low calorie
you must be clinically obese senpai

>>10895542
It's 800 calories of fucking fat.

>>10895622
Looks like a comfy existence.

>>10895622
is that a typical egg farm?

Looks super clean and not overly horrible conditions for the chicks

>>10895570
Whats that green stuff he's spreading at the beginning?

>>10895674
Herbs. Probably mint chutney.

>>10895674
goddamn gooks. As if the cooking alive wasn't bad enough, they cut the fucking things head off just for fun. Fucking subhuman savages.

>>10895679
Oh, and here I thought it was one of those joke vids and the guy was spreading green shit all over.

>>10895006
why do japs have an obsession with creampies?

>>10895018
folded 125,000 times.

>>10895674
Remind me why we never stormed the whole of east asia and implemented christian morals there ?
I mean they took to capitalism well enough, it should'nt be that hard to convert them when your base society is so fucking fucked in the head.

>>10895014
elle est trop cuite ton omelette putain.

>>10895018
>cut lengthwise
>on a fucking sewer

>>10894997
Do you actually make OC or do you just post the same fucking webms in every thread?

>>10895018
>cut lengthwise
>on a fucking skewer

>>10895006
that egg is so undercooked that just pouring a sauce on it makes it fall apart

>>10895483
this, I want to wring her neck

>>10895691
Quit your bitching.

>>10895776
>Cut chickens head off, let it run around
>This is fine, christian values
>Cut eel's head off, let it squirm
>Fucking gooks

>>10894997
KEK. Good job on the file name, anon.

>>10895287
>Overcooked
get your eyes checked

>>10895570
indians truly are subhuman

>>10895658
>not everything in real life is a PETA advertisement
well color me shocked!

>>10895700
they're forced to make all of their ice by hand to preserve their honor

>>10895815
why make content when faggots like you do it for me?

>>10895014
Pro tip: brush your omelette with a bit of melted butter so your garnish doesn't ricochet off all over the shop.

>>10896057
>undercooked
i don't know why retards like you even bother to post
no one takes you seriously

>>10896369
legitimately: thanks for the tip. i learned something

>>10895815
lurk more. might be a different op this time but most webm threads are from a single guy who makes clips out of youtube videos. he'll repost the same ones for a couple weeks before making a new batch.

>>10896347
I always wanted to have my ice sculpted by a salaryman.

>>10896385

>>10895026
>free range eggs

lol fuck off hippie

>>10896762
old guy trying to take the chink's chicken is clearly not asian
most likely eastern european or eastern mediterranean

Someone capable of making this a webm?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7ci92bVu6L8

>>10896357
>taps the knife

>>10896915

>>10896347
How do you get ice that's clear like that?

All the ice that comes out of my freezer has that cloudyness in the middle.

>>10896931
Whoops

>>10897046
fold it 1000+ times

>>10895001
Wtf is that

>>10897069
Post it unreversed. I'm interested

>>10896771
I want them in my mouth fuck I'm hungry

>>10897046
Bring the water to a boil twice, then place in ice trays. Cloudy ice comes from undisolved gasses in the water. Boiling releases these gasses.

>>10894997

>>10897363
Yeah, I read up on it after the sarcastic response.

Apparently, you can put ice trays in an open cooler in your freezer, and it eliminates most of the cloudiness by freezing the ice from the top down.

>>10896771
It sucks when those gloves get holes in them. You get hot juices and boiling oil on you and it's not fun.

i made some oc

>>10895776
>Be nip
>Clean by ass with paper, have high level of alphabetization in my land, enough money to buy the planet and high tech powder technology
>A Ork looking fuck arrives in my beach floating in a rudimentar piece of wood full of corpses smelling like shit
>He eats with his dirt hands and asks why the fish isn't salted and dry like a piece of wood
>They call me a savage all of the sudden. we all laugh
>He trows a fit, but we can't understand since their alphabet has too few letters
>They send some bald fags trying to convert us, we decapitate all of then and impale their heads in sticks on our beaches to tell the orks that coming here is a bad idea
>Portuguese/Spanish/Bong orks get pissy, send a bunch of ugly "warboats" with cannons that shoot like a drunk old man pissing
>We stay on land and shoot at them from distance, all ships sink inmediataly. Minimal losses to our side. At least 30 "legendary colonists" sleeping while drinking shark piss
>The orks omit their ass whooping from their books
>Evolve to be even fatter and degenerates orks, getting darker and darker every day
>We still sell them overpriced shit to make their lifes less pathetic

>>10897069
wow life is wonderful :)

>>10897222
big burger maybe

>>10897495
>alphabetization
they have two syllabaries and a system of heiroglyphics/glyphs
no alphabet

>>10897534
food looks disgusting anyways

>>10897612
>t. wh*toid

>>10897495
So why is China always complaining that the West humiliated and weakened them?

>>10897907
hispanic actually

>>10895719
Superior japanese eggs...

>>10897920
because of what happened during imperialism and the early 20th century

>pic related
>its me

>>10896220
I like this

>>10896762
Imagine how happy /pol/ would be if anyone in that webm was black

>>10897222
A bunch of onions, peppers, tomatoes and spices he's cracking eggs onto

>>10898099
Imagine only thinking about /pol/ and DRUMPF all day long

>>10898204
It's hard to get away from you guys on this websight

>>10897944
>t. mutt

>>10898305
>someone who hates /pol/ brings them up
>gosh you /pol/ guys wont stfu!!!!
Zero self awareness

>>10898262

10/10

>>10895570
Fat calories are healthy
It's the carb calories that caused you to weigh 180 pounds

>>10898349
Different anon. I didn't bring you up. But I wish you would just go away

Did someone say eggs?

>>10894997

>>10896771
>ywn wield the costco sword

>>10898541
>The one way you should actually be eating expensive-ass avocados
>You should be throwing them out right in the trash and just using the skins as cookware

>>10898405
Then go somewhere else. Maybe 9gag

>>10895287
>"omelette"
>nothing in it
>just a tube of scrambled eggs with chives on it

Why do the french do shit like this

Egg?

>>10897987
WHAT'S IT DOING??? YOU RUINS IT!!!!!!!!!

>>10898005
I've never seen so much marbling

>>10897369

Does any item at McDonald's have regular mayonnaise on it? I can't think of anything they serve with straight mayo.

>>10897481
First time food gave me a literal boner

>>10898795
Daily double

>>10898795
McChicken

>>10895674
100% 색똥게

>>10898796
yeah, nah
it wasn't the food

>>10898005

If I was rich I'd have a youtube channel where I just bought really nice food and ruined it intentionally, well-done kobe, etc.

>>10897944
>Hispanic thinks a food looks disgusting
Huh?

>>10898441
>semen resembling dipping sauce
Every time.

>>10895014
Everything about this video is reddit. Jesus.

>>10895386
Clearly the only thing their owners eat is avocados and jism. Oh and soy.

>>10898541
Why do people make these shitty leddit videos for the most piss poor, basic ass recipes? You could describe how to make these in one paragraph and only a drooling retard wouldn't be able to do it.

>>10896220
Best food motto ever!

>>10895622
WTF EGG SNATCHER AT THE END

>>10895460
Holy shit, I can understand hating a certain way someone does a thing. But I hate every single thing this person does in this webm. Even the way he talks/shakes his head like a fucking parkinsons patient. Please put him out of his misery.

>>10895463
Why are all food videos nowadays like this? It's not even interesting. It's fucking annoying.

>>10897506
Who in the holy fuck would eat this? Sounds like one of these things that people take an Instagram video of, take one bite, then throw away.

Liberals were a mistake.

>>10899336
what movie is this?

>>10895570
Avocados are between 300-350 cal each

>>10896771
This needs the Isengard theme from The Two Towers.

>>10899110
I love htis one

>>10897495
>>10897920

>>10897046
>>10897363
Don't listen to these guys, it has nothing to do with dissolved gases, it's all about directional freezing. You need to freeze a large chunk at a time in a small cooler in the freezer until it's not totally frozen, the impurities will be pushed out into the remaining water and the stuff that freezes first will be totally clear. Take out your block when there's still about 10% liquid water in the cooler and chop it up as seen in the video.

>>10898608
but how does he get the ball out without breaking all the eggs?

>>10895386
I can never stop watching this video because that woman is so obnoxious that it's a spectacle.

>>10894997
There he is. There he goes again. Look, everyone! He posted it once again! Isn't he just the funniest guy around?! Oh my God.

I can almost see your pathetic overweight frame glowing in the dark, lit by your computer screen which is the only source of light in your room, giggling like a like girl as you once again type your little egg thread up and fill in the captcha. Or maybe you don't even fill in the captcha. Maybe you're such a disgusting NEET that you actually paid for a 4chan pass, so you just choose the webm. Oh, and we all know the webm. The "surly" egg fort guy, isn't it? I imagine you little shit laughing so hard as you click it that you drop your greasy egg sandwich on the floor, but it's ok, your mother will clean it up in the morning. Oh, that's right. Did I fail to mention? You live with your mother. You are a fat fucking fuckup, she's probably so sick of you already. So sick of having to do everything for you all goddamn day, every day, for a grown man who spends all his time on 4chan posting about eggs. Just imagine this. She had you, and then she thought you were gonna be a scientist or an astronaut or something grand, and then you became a NEET. A pathetic Eggfag NEET. She probably cries herself to sleep everyday thinking about how bad it is and how she wishes she could just disappear. She can't even try to talk with you because all you say is "HOW'S HE GET OUT WITHOUT BREAKING THE EGGS?" You've become a parody of your own self. And that's all you are. A sad little man laughing in the dark by himself as he prepares to indulge in the same old dance that he's done a million times now. And that's all you'll ever be.

Forever...

>>10895674
What's the point of this? Uneven cooking?

>>10899151
Can someone explain to me how a non leddit video would look like?

>>10898441
>Flaccid

>>10899694

>>10899557
shamefur dispray

>>10899336
why are you trying to make me gay asshole

>>10896357
Quite right. It's not worth it to make anything new for dipshits who do nothing.

>>10899541
Purple Noon, 1960

>>10897920
opium wars + colonialism by half of europe and the US
normally i would say colonialism had a net positive effect, but this was a certain exception

>>10895460
where is this from? i need to know

>>10899531
>take one bite, then throw away
You say as if we are not human??? I would eat that cheesy shit no matter how cheesy just because cheese.

>>10895386
hahaha shes going to have to shit it all out
shits going to have to ooze out of her ass
she shits, imagine her shitting

>>10895819
https://youtu.be/m1-55FQRU6Y?t=5m22s
You can serve nip omelettes on a skewer, dangus.

>>10899052
the more i see this video, the more i think its satire.

>>10900237
Because it is.

>>10896220
Hoi kou ro is fucking amazing. simple and delicious as fuck. I wish I knew what it was called in English.

>>10898780
Yea a Kobe, Matsuzaka or Ishigaki beef steak like that in Japan would set you back about $100 in a restaurant easy. I had Kobe beef only once, and Ishigaki beef twice. Shit's expensive but if you're there it's worth trying. It just melts in your mouth, it's so good.

>>10900237
That's because it fucking is you moron.
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLVqOKx7e2qhefIG5IEGOKQ4pCzFf8IScX

>>10900313
>Hoi kou ro
well it's Twice-cooked pork, a Sichuan-style dish
not sure if it's going to taste the same though

>>10898305
>implying we like chinks

>>10900340
>>10900286
With the current state of the modern world and Jackposting i dont know anymore...

>>10900375
You're still fucking retarded.

>>10895002
here u go anon

>>10895002

>>10895776
I think spainards tried that in japan and it went really poorly

>>10900107
haha

>>10894997
There's heating pipes under the eggs btw, in case you were wondering how he gets out

>>10900384
glad you know.

>>10897069
Thank you kind sir

>>10900420
Wouldn't that just precook all the eggs?

>>10897495
If you unironically think anything went this way you're a retard.
But its ok I guess considering that 97% of all big and important inventions were invented by whites.

>>10898382
>i dont know what calories are and believe that there are magic "good" calories that don't put on weight and magic "bad" calories that go straight to your thighs.

weight loss and gain is calories in vs calories out you lardass

>>10899658
meat contracts when heated. The entire eel is a meat tube so when one part heats it contracts causing the swishing motion

>>10896220
>fucking raw egg as a dip

fucking gooks

>>10897069
>Magic chickens
What is it

>>10900448
>the moment an energy source touches your tonsils your body is obliged to use it
wew

>>10899992
Ooo my candy godiva

>>10896347
DAT BE 80 DORRAR GAIJIN

>>10898032
>pic related
>its me

>>10896762
Those are probably the best rotisserie chicken I've had from any store.

y the fuck did i ever come to this website

>>10898796
what are you, fucking gay?

>>10900700
you were lonely but too shy for a site that requires accounts and other 4chan boards were too fast for you to ever have a chance to engage

>>10897369
Was this done to show that deconstructing dishes is often pretentious bullshit?

>>10895542
OK well it's also a month's worth of pesticide exposure.

>>10900278
deep fried prions

>>10900375
tfw jack had a stroke and lost use of his right arm :(

>>10895018
>mirin

>>10895776
the eel is dead long before they put it on the grill, bro

>>10900786

>>10898441
these people are turning the children gay and it is considered "harmless fun"
fucking degenerates

>>10898099
why would they be happy? wtf are you even implying??? fucking retarded

>>10897987
All that butter isn't good for you

>>10898305
>websight

it's time for you to go

>>10895460
>>10900076
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YfbVkQHh8s4

>>10900911
I don't know why but this grosses me out and intrigues me at the same time. I wanna try it.

>>10900730
>things that never existed

>>10900786
Rip zyzz, your gains will be missed

>>10900077
t. tasty CEO

>>10895483
>>10899569
(((Weisman)))

>>10900738
And they say Germans aren't funny.

>>10901253
Nevermind, it's apparently Austrian.

>>10901262
Austria is Germany's little brother who wants to feel special and unique while being almost entirely the same, not much of a difference.

>>10895622
sleep tight cluckers

>>10897987
imagine her fingers around your dick haha

>>10895460
>what if reviewbrah turns gay

>>10895674
baby poop

>>10900709
no, he was literally deconstructing a big mac to make it fancy

>>10897506
I can't eat anything that makes my hands feel all sticky

>>10900401
>toasting bread on salty scramble eggs
my throat feels dry just by looking at it

>>10898005
and served on Wonderbread

>>10894997
Eggs, leave, how?

>>10896347
>I ordered this neat

>>10898005
>cut up my food for me
he's not my mom.

>>10897222
It looks like a giant shakshuka

I made some new shit

>>10901927
>>10901934
women are so cringy

>>10901934
Look at that guy trying not to get a boner

>>10901953
>not getting a boner when you can see a thots lady lips with her leds spread

>>10901966
I worked in a restaurant before. There is no way she doesn't know she's on camera

>>10894997
Is he able to not break any eggs when leaving?

>>10901982
DELETE THIS RIGHT NOW

>>10896347
>here's your whiskey on the rocks with ice that i've been fondling with my bare hands for the past 5 minutes, piggu-san. that'll be 1 mirrion yen.

>>10902009
I hope that isn't the same stick they use to beat the dogs to death with. I'm a vegan.

>Food and cooking
>half the webms are just random thots being sluts

>>10902051
/ck/ - Food & Cooking & Tits

>>10901927

The "Late 20s and still single without a child" dance.

>>10901958
>scraping over the cutting board with the sharp side of the blade

>>10901958
>getting a boner to some used up thot you can probably fuck in the next 10 minutes
>giving thots power over you in social situations
>validating thots that aren't boutta put out

>>10901982
I've never seen a spider hatch before, that's so cute!

>>10899505
Made for viewing on a phone.
That's literally it.
Very often people won't bother with sound. These videos are made so that they work silent. Hence the high amount of text.
Additionally you need to keep it short, but snappy, because it's so easy to swipe away. That's why it's fast cuts to keep it (supposedly) interesting without sound.

>>10902309
And people wonder where our attention spans have gone

>>10900911
No idea why he would do that but the guy looks like a major hardass.

>>10900943
Imagine feeling them wriggle in your stomach.

Fucking.

No.

>>10902423
Reminds me of ilovethefishes.com

>>10901963
>squeezing lime juice over a bowl of limes
Genius

>>10895463
looks and sounds absolutely disgusting

why doesn't this guy
>>10894997
just call this guy
>>10895001
to help him get out of his egg fort? it'd take no time at all.

>>10895026
carbonara a la faggot

>>10895386
of course NY steals from LA 10 years too late then makes a jew push it...

>>10902624
>>of course NY steals from LA 10 years too late then makes a jew push it...

erm, schizophrenic jew now that I actually watched it...

>>10900936
>two boots
fuck yeah I remember going there when I was little... they used to let me play with raw pizza dough.
also that guy (in the video, not dabbing-man) looks like man most likely to run a two boots pizzeria

>>10895219
To be fair, he says in the video the garlic is optional.

>>10901469
So, pretentious bullshit with not a hint of irony?

>>10902657
...why do you keep asking questions you know the answer to?

>>10901973
>Does Anon live here
>"no"
>Then who are you
>"anon"
>But you said you don't live here
>"you call this living?"

>>10901973
>papa johns
deserves death

>>10901975
this is so fucking unbearable stupid

>>10901326
Aren't they essentially Bavarians.

>>10898441
uh those dicks are 2x as big as the asian population (yes there are stats) ((yess they include india because they have they tinest peckers))

and uh its semen resembeling icing?? uhh wat


upvote plz

>>10896762
wow im glad I don't live in Canada!

>>10895026
In Jamie's defense, on his own youtube channel he has a real eye-talian who corrects these >>10895219 mistakes

>>10902733
Forgot link https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3AAdKl1UYZs

>>10901927
my city has a really good pizzeria that turns into a nightclub at night. they keep the pizza coming though. it's nice.

>>10902789
Awful recipe. Literally looks like fucking prison food. Garbage.

>>10896357
that will be 20 bucks, whitu piggu


...oh wait

>>10897369
300 dollarruuuz whitu pigguuu

>>10897369
>>no gloves...

um no sweetie, i live in UK and ACHMED touches, you know... (((not piggus)))

>>10894997
How egg??

>>10902855
egg how?

>>10902789
Poverty cuisine

>>10897369
one mirrion dorra whitu piggu

>>10900409
it went great until ameritards nuked the Catholic City of Japan, aka Hiroshima

>>10897987
I wish she could rim my ass like that croissant

>>10897987
would work better if her face was actually round.

concave isn't good as a rolling pin :)

>>10898005
>>10898005
only cook get knife, to cut meat and threaten whittu piggu if no pay. also you eat with stick

>>10898305
8 more years of your growing insanity lol

>>10898541
no homo

>>10894997
Ok let me in on the meme... What the fuck is so special.about this dude and his egg sandwich?

>>10900632
Please tell me this isn't from a reality show and that guy doesn't actually look like a stereotypical jew.

>>10900781
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vnf-XEQCTQg

>>10902499
thx anon, I came

>>10902822
because it is prison food

>>10900929
Being this new on this websight. Maybe you should leave

>>10901927
women were a mistake...

>>10901934
gaaaayyyyy

>>10901932
That looks like a really good Detroit style Za.

>>10903043

>>10902079
it's a santoku, it'll be fine

>>10903069
See? People love 'go 'za. Stupid contrarian /ck/

>>10903069
I feel as if these types of videos are a reflection of human interaction rather than the ratings that individuals give to the food proposed.

>>10903160
What the fuck are you saying?

>>10903160
I mean they go hand in hand, but the social group seems to have more influence than an individual giving a rating based on his/her own views without a group context.

>>10903164
I'm kind of drunk, but i feel as if the social group has greater influence than the individual opinion itself.

>>10903164
but i guess that is why we have leaders, revolution, and war

>>10903175
Post more of your drunken thoughts on human social hierarchy I'm interested

>>10899250
after attempting to teach this board to cook for years, i can patently tell you that this is false. People will starve to death before they can be asked to read a paragraph, and this is precisely why we deserve whatever happens to us.

>>10903164
I'm not sure if a true individual perception can be given in a social setting, or at least it is hard to come by.

>>10903177
I just think that individuals will subjugate their thoughts to fit a social norm when in reality they have other subversive, or contrary opinions.

>>10898382
>It's the carb calories that caused you to weigh 180 pounds
You say that like 180 pounds is clinically obese or something.

>>10903220
It could be. If you're 5'6" or under I think it does.

>>10903203
Very true. But we couldn't have a culture, much less a society, if people did not submit to certain norms.

>>10901942
>That lipstick stain
Gross

>>10901942
Eating raw eggs is such a dumb meme. Don't they know the protein in raw eggs is not metabolized almost at all? That only cooking eggs allows you to metabolize it? Meatheads are such meatheads

>>10903246
Thanks Dr. Retard. Any other Bro Science tips to offer?

>>10903222
>That smug fat face
>That skinny bitch saying how the fat one eats healthier than her
It's like this scene was created for the sole purpose of inducing rage

>>10903259
Dr. Phil is one of the greatest humans on Earth. Spends his whole life just inviting people on his show to prove how wrong they are.

>>10903249
You're the retard, obviously. Less than half the protein is metabolized. It completely misses the point of eating a lot of raw eggs, when you can cook all of them and get more than twice as much protein.

>>10903017
he's gotta cook them all bro

>>10897920
they didn't want to be open, but they got opened so merchants could make money selling opium
also they got the shit kicked out of them in the process

>>10903229
You are right, but I think it is a case of subjugating individuality for collectivity .

>>10895006
>salmonella
no thanks

>>10895386
>avocado everything
>Only go through 200/day
How small are they?

>>10903222
fat people think they eat less lmao

Did you want some oc

>>10901535
At least he looks happy and fulfilled

>>10900786
dude skipped leg day something fierce
mustve been the fact he roided and didnt actually work out

>>10901927
>"""""pizza""""""
>it's just floppy uncooked tomato sauce bread

>>10902696
he's Australia's richest and most successful youtubers and in the top 10 or 20 channels in the world. I agree it's stupid, but its worked for him for years now.
i mean i'd love to be paid millions to smash up my kitchen, not gunna lie.

>>10900632
why did this make me so sad

>>10901428
As an American I'd like to apologize to everyone