/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>hold in shit for 4 days
>huge mess that fills the entire bowl comes out

>binge drink for three days straight
>drink ice water on day four
>rumbleguts
>explosive black shotgun shit getting it out of your system
>go back to bed
>eat solid food again
There's your better feeling.

>>10691303
still proud of the one shit i took that was one endless piece filling the entire bowl. almost clogged it too.

>>10691482
that was your intestine dude.

>shit
>its green

a...am I dying? subsequent shits have been regular brown, what the fuck happened?

>>10691556
Captain Crunch, anon

>>10691303
>be mexican
>train your body since newborn to eat spicy food
>own habanero is your if it's your bitch
>White and Blacks complain about canned jalapeno being "too spicy"

Feelsgoodman

>>10691712
what?
I don't eat cereal

>>10691556
did you eat anything green?
Green poop either means you ate a lot of lettuce/broccoli or other greens, or it means you're missing some vital nutrients in your diet
t. someone who spent 5 seconds on google

>>10691734
>be white
>already better than you
>dont have to create scenarios that make me feel better about being a wetback

Feelsgoodman

>>10691766
>be white
>see your race dying in Europe
>Muslim and Jews rape your people without lube
>instead of helping your european brothers and sisters by having white children and strong moral white family, you shitpost on 4chan and talk shit to a anon spic.
>Thinks he better than me

Lmao

>>10691766
>insecurity: the post

>>10691794
>be taco taco don juan
>cry as abuela is thrown into ICE truck and deported
>cry more when white birth rates are on the rise in merica

>>10692356
>Be söy sipping big boy John
>Save up your GBP to get that Nintendo switch that your wife promise to get you
>Maybe 10 more GBP and your wife let you sleep with her on the bed instead of Tyrone.
>Finally get your Nintendo switch with a gaping smile to watch Rick and Morty.

>>10691746
i have green poop after drinking four locos with green or blur dies thats healthy right they get it from the veggies right?

>>10691303
oh that's a good one
Cleanses out the trenches real good.
The only downside is the asshole burn as you shit out your stomach acids as well (probably just the capsaicin coming back to fuck you up one more time)

>>10691303
>eat really spicy food
>forget that you did that
>take some detox pills designed to clear your gut out
>shit out literal hot sauce from my asshole

I have ascended and smiled upon the face of God.

>>10691303
>Is there a better feeling?
Yes:
>Eat Popeye's spicy chicken tendies with mardi gras mustard
>Wash down with tea sweeter than honey
>Begin shitting liquid fire while singing David Bowie's Space Oddity

>drink a shitload during a winter night
>go to bed happily drunk with a glass of water by bed
>wake up, have to take a 5 liter piss
>stumble into cold bathroom, take the greatest piss
>go back to room and crawl into warm, toasty bed feeling 5 pounds lighter
>chug water and pass back out

>>10691309
>hold in shit for 4 days
>get constipation
C-Cool!

>>10693187
wow epic xD cool!

>>10691328
I know this feel

>>10691303
> high fiber diet
> eat 3k cal in burgers and other dense items
> single massive turd of several pounds exits ass
> feel heavy and bloated to light and free in milliseconds

>>10691303
>make food with as much spices and chili as you can without spoiling the flavour
>eat it
>spices rip all the skin off your tongue
>show your annihilated tongue to your friends
>they are all horrified
Is this how an Übermensch feels?

>>10691303
>make bastardized turkey chili bc bulkan
>add chili powder, cayenne and an entire bottle of cholula to the mixture of onion, beans, tomatoes, and ground turkey
>eat with soft boiled egg and avocado
>my farts are hot in both temperature and spice
>drink coffee next morning
>take steaming anaconda that sears my asshole
>lift and then eat more chili to continue the cycle

>>10691734
>>>/pol/
You accidentally typed /ck/ you dyslexic insecure fuck

Why gringos always get diarrhea after eating spicy food?

>>10691303

>fracture leg so severely I require hospitalization and surgery
>now have an external fixator and all the opiates I can eat and inject
>after seven days I attempt to go to the tiny closet bathroom in my room with the nurses helping me
>because it's so small and I can't bend my leg, attempt is aborted
>next day I attempt to use a bedside commode but nothing happening
>day 10
>IT IS TIME
>manage to get on my side and hold the bedpan to my ass because I cannot lift myself at all
>taking deep breaths
>I feel the cosby kid begin to crown
>take it nice and slow, there's not even any pain after the first few initial pushes
>finally it starts to slide out nice and smooth
>for a solid seven or eight minutes of ecstasy
>feel my eyes start to roll back
>hit nurse button when I finish
>qt3.14 thicc black nurse wipes me while giving me more morphine
>mon visage quand

>>10692532
When I was a kid one day I drank a lot of mint syrup and when I took a shit it was light green.

>>10691746
Eat iron tablets and you get a disgusting dark green

>>10691556
i ate an entire box of blue fruit roll ups when i was a kid and my shit was turquoise. it was cool.

>>10691766
What's that? Another white woman loudly moaning Tyrone's name while you continue to shitpost on 4chan

>ITT: halp /ck/ my farts smell like sperm
>>10691734
>own habanero is your if it's your bitch
>is your if it's your bitch
>is if your it is
Oh wait
>be mexican
Found the problem here

>>10692347
Its just banter. No one seriously takes this to heart, r-right?

>>10692510
>be burrito juanito
>killing dragons in runescape is more profitable than an actual job in your country

>>10694823
>I feel the cosby kid begin to crown