/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>Live in university residence for a few years
>Basically an apartment, individual rooms, kitchen, etc
>Know the people I'm moving in with, so I basically buy all the pots and pans and kitchen stuff
>For 2 years, everything is fine.
>Decide to take a summer off to just chill and work and make a little spending money for the fall
>Tell roommates they can just hand on to all the kitchen stuff since I'm coming back in the fall and will be living back home with my parents over the summer
>university gives roommates get another roommate while I'm gone
>I get back in the fall
>all my Teflon pans are scratched to all damn
>roommates tell me new guy would cook something, it would get burned on, so he would use a fork to scratch off all the burned on debris.
>Pots are burned BLACK
>half the cutlery is gone

Dude was an alcoholic too apparently, drinking like 8 to 16 beer a day, every day. He lives next door now, in the apparent down the hall. One morning he was drunk and trying to get into our apartment, apparently forgot he no longer lived here. Fuck that guy.

Shit stories? Sure, why not
>Be 8 years old
>eat nothing but kraft dinner (mac and cheese)
>don't poop for a few days
>mention this to mom
>takes me to dr
>gives me weird milky medicine
>take medicine
>ohshitgottapoop.jpeg
>working on the biggest shit of my life to this day at age 8
>actually hurts so much
>pray to god to kill me
>notevenkidding.jpeg
>god won't kill me
>I finally pass a shit the size of a softball out of a 8 year old anus
>actually pass out
>wake up the next day an atheist because any god that loved me would of provided me with a mercy killing in my time of need.

tldr: I'm mad God would not strike me down mid shit at the age of 8