/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>be 18
>sunday evening, eat some food with the family
>the usual, barbeque, meatballs, etc
>following day
>brother starts having fever at noon, like 39 degrees fever while shaking
>oh crap
>tomorrow i was planning on seeing a crush I've had for 8 years and was planning to confess my feelings to her
>thankfully i have no problems, looks like i'm gonna make it totally fine to the next day
>10PM
>start shaking
>ohshit.jpg
>instantly tell her I can't make it and have to postpone our meeting

>following week
>explosive diarrhea
>shit is black as coal
>shit stinks so back that it almost makes me puke while i'm on the toilet
>intestines hurt so hard that i can barely sleep
>feels like someone grabbed my guts and started twisting them hard constantly
>god please take me
>told later that for roughly 2 days i was mostly passed out

>a couple of weeks later find out that my crush had a bf
>mfw my body tried to shield me from an awkward situation