/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>drink gallon of milk
>poop comes out white the next day
>eat the entire bar of chocolate
>poop comes out chocolate color next day
>eat whole jar of pickled beetroot
>poop comes out pink next day
>eat the entire block of cheese
>poop comes out brown with white stripes, THE SAME DAY
Must be because I'm low IQ but I can't find a pattern

niggers are ruining America. why are we defending them again?

>he microwaves his pizza rolls

>be me
>22 year old Uni student
>just got back home after studying 5 hours
>hotaf.weather
>tiredaf.exe
>really hungry
what do ?
>open fridge
>see opened can of beans but i'm not feeling like it
>see bottle of yogurt
>should be nice
>openbottle.exe
>decide to drink straight from bottle
half the yogurt spills out
>mrw when the yogurt was expired
>mrw when I look like I came out from a japenese porno
>feelsbukakeman

>>10540435
>go to a restaurant
>grab waitress by the ass
>waitress doesn't tell me "excellent choice, sir"

>used to think that all women are vegetarian

>>9469150
Wtf i hate tea packets now... really makes you think...

>bread with seasoning

>>9032213
>is given mysterious chinese snake oil
>drinks it anyway

Alright guys- crazy shit just happened.

> go to take a scoot, and leave a post-it note on the front saying "back in five minutes"
> hear the door open and close while I'm busy, but easily finish before 5 minutes
> see no one waiting
> go to the far back kitchen to wash some pots
> I guess the speaker in the back that let's you know the doors are opening failed
> washing dishes
> woman comes out of nowhere and asks where the staff are
> niggaiamthestaff.jpg
> waitwhythehellareyouhere.jpg
> some woman, who had been waiting for 20 minutes at the very most (which I doubt because, again, no one was there when I finished my scoot) decided it was the best course action to walk behind the counter, wander our processing plant where we make and store valuable shit, and locate me in order to buy some sourdough
The only reason I didn't kick her out on the spot was because my brain failed to fully register the situation until she had left and I saw the same facial expression I had on two other waiting customers.