/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>11023398
This anon speaks truths

This reminds me of a date i had in highschool

>be me
>16
>go to girls house
>parents come down stairs before daughter
>fuck this is like a movie
>i play it cool
>dad is cool, but mom is concerned she doesn't know me
>i need her to like me
>in movies the guy always charms with a joke
>"i'm taking your daughter to arby's"
>i expected her to ask why arbys
>"what the fuck is wrong with you"
>i answer faster than i realize what she said
>"i've got the meats"
>i do a cheeky pelvic thrust while i say this
>mom is looking at me like im retarded
>i am retarded
>dad starts laughing his ass off
>girl heard me say this
>"what the fuck i thought we were getting pizza"
>i need to save this
>"oh yeah, that's right. You ready?"
>we leave
>date's alright
>mom later asked girl if i was autistic
>tfw i got away with it