/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>10871472
How to chop an onion and not cry like a little bitch or look like a retard.
>1. Cut the top off the onion. Not the end with the brown fibers you fucking moron.
>2. Peel off a layer or two, make sure you peel off the skin too.
>3. Rinse the outside of the onion with cold water and scrub with your hand. It has a slimy feeling to it, but as you scrub you can feel it going away. This helps with releasing shit while you're chopping so you don't cry.
>4. Take a sharp chef knife, and I hope to god you keep your knives sharp you mongoloid, and cut it in half down through the root. Sharper knives help with preventing whatever it is onions release and thus making you cry like a little bitch.
>5. Lay the half onion down flat on the cutting board.
>6. Cut parallel lines towards the root. Make them as thin or thicc as you want. Thicker is chopped, thinner is diced, and even thinner is minced.
>7. Cut across like as if you were going to slice it (which was probably your first instinct you retard).
>8. Repeat for the other side, or don't I don't care.
>Tip: A largish white onion chopped is about equal to a cup. Half is obviously half a cup.
Wa la, you've successfully performed a basic cooking task that a lot of people fuck up, end up crying, and looking like a retard.