/ck/ - Food & Cooking

>>17168814
I went to bed last night with an itchy crack. The thing is when I woke up in the morning my finger smelled like Gruyere. Now, Gruyere is my favorite cheese and I can not tell you how perturbed I was to make the mental connection between my anus and my favorite cheese. It may have something to do with the fact that I ate a whole block of Gruyere before I went to bed. Never the less, every time I look at a piece of Gruyere my nostrils fill with the smell of an unwashed rectum. With that said, I think I am forever done with Gruyere. I've looked high and low for cheeses to replace my beloved Gruyere. Gouda, no. American, hell no. Havarti, no. Comte, no. Jack, no. Dick, no. Swiss, no. Fontina, no. Jarlsberg, no. Appenzeller, no. Parmagiano Reggiano, no. Now the greatest pleasure in my life has been reduced to horrifying PTSD. How can one continue to go on like this? Without ever being able to experience the hedonistic desire to eat a whole block of Gruyere in a single sitting? Why even live?

I went to bed last night with an itchy crack. The thing is when I woke up in the morning my finger smelled like Gruyere. Now, Gruyere is my favorite cheese and I can not tell you how perturbed I was to make the mental connection between my anus and my favorite cheese. It may have something to do with the fact that I ate a whole block of Gruyere before I went to bed. Never the less, every time I look at a piece of Gruyere my nostrils fill with the smell of an unwashed rectum. With that said, I think I am forever done with Gruyere. I've looked high and low for cheeses to replace my beloved Gruyere. Gouda, no. American, hell no. Havarti, no. Comte, no. Jack, no. Dick, no. Swiss, no. Fontina, no. Jarlsberg, no. Appenzeller, no. Parmagiano Reggiano, no. Now the greatest pleasure in my life has been reduced to horrifying PTSD. How can one continue to go on like this? Without ever being able to experience the hedonistic desire to eat a whole block of Gruyere in a single sitting? Why even live?

>>17160530
I went to bed last night with an itchy crack. The thing is when I woke up in the morning my finger smelled like Gruyere. Now, Gruyere is my favorite cheese and I can not tell you how perturbed I was to make the mental connection between my anus and my favorite cheese. It may have something to do with the fact that I ate a whole block of Gruyere before I went to bed. Never the less, every time I look at a piece of Gruyere my nostrils fill with the smell of an unwashed rectum. With that said, I think I am forever done with Gruyere. I've looked high and low for cheeses to replace my beloved Gruyere. Gouda, no. American, hell no. Havarti, no. Comte, no. Jack, no. Dick, no. Swiss, no. Fontina, no. Jarlsberg, no. Appenzeller, no. Parmagiano Reggiano, no. Now the greatest pleasure in my life has been reduced to horrifying PTSD. How can one continue to go on like this? Without ever being able to experience the hedonistic desire to of eat a whole block of Gruyere in a single sitting? Why even live?